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> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#2 - rockstarbabyyyyy [OP]
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(02/15/2013) [-]
what do you mean by work on the lyrics?
User avatar #3 to #2 - nogphille
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(02/15/2013) [-]
sorry, you should've replied to me if you want me to get a notification though.
and i mean...
though the rythm is good, the vocals aren't bad.
the lyrics just seem uninspired.
the chorus could use a rhyme so it'll stick in your head easier, and it just lacks something essential.. something recognizable.. humor or depth.. something.

but hey, you're welcome to do it any way you please.. it's not bad.
or if you want, i could try to help out if you wish.. i'm not that good of a songwriter, but i do know good poetry and/or humor..
User avatar #1 - nogphille
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(02/15/2013) [-]
it's not bad, but it's not that good either..
work on the lyrics especially..

and don't compare yourself to the 'other boys'
you're not a boy, you're a MAN.