CI Happy Bird Anonymous : ait ' Replies:
I only have a few hours to write this. After that, Happy Bird will be off the market I' ll likely be gone forever. This serves as a warning to anybody thinking about playing
Happy Bird: DONT. Your soul will be consumed.
It all started last week. All of my annoying friends on Facebook were posting about a game called flappy bird, and about how hard and addictive it is. What' s the deal with
this'?, I thought. Then after days of hearing about it nonstop I caved and downloaded it in the app store. Little did I know this was the beginning of the end.
The game is stupid and there' s no point to it, it' s just so impossibly hard that you can' t help but keep playing. At firsti laughed and asked myself, "why am I playing this"?"
but about 2 hours in, I knew I had a mission. I had to get the platinum medal. Monday came around and I kept my phone under my desk to play without the teacher' s
knowledge, sometimes even excusing myself and hiding in the bathroom to play it, skipping multiple classes. I don' t think the teacher could do anything about it though,
she just sat there with a blank expression on her face, iphone loosely hanging in her limp hand. She had already fallen victim to Happy Bird. Anyways, I started to get the
hang of it, at first getting past it obstacles then finally being able to go past 20, earning me the silver medal.
Then things took a turn for the worse.
laas on a roll, well past the gold medal point and determined to score higher than anybody has before. So I sat there in my room, ignoring my mother, eating Twizlers and using old soda bottles in
place of bathroom breaks. I was so focused on the bird on the small screen. I didn' t know what my score was so I checked. 50. That' s a platinum medal, but I didn' t feel like celebrating.
CI Anonymous "ll T: 24 Replies:
I thought the game would end at that point but itjust kept on going, the obstacles never got harder and there were no new elements of the game. It was a test of patience. Focus. will to become
one with the game. The barely alive, shallowly breathing hivemind that is Happy Bird.
en you die, the game is over and starts again on the same screen and you' re made to play all over again. You' re stuck in an infinite loop and you can' t stop because you have to win. You may
advance, but after a paint there' s no further to go and you just start over again.
WI]. 500. Then, finaly after a good 48 hours, Willi]. My screen went black, and my consciousness being sucked from my body, into the phone. I was falling. I could look up and see myself,
only the whites of my eyes showing. I had been separated from my body and was a slave to Happy Bird.
I woke up and thought "wow, what a bad dream, now it' s time to try and get the high score again." I groped for my phone to find that my fingers had no dexterity and had turned into win gs. I
opened my eyes. etwas time to fly. my wings in vain, darting to avoid running into pipes, but it was no use. I kept crashing. I tried to scream but only squawks came out The city in the
background is abandoned.