so? you jelly?

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my herd in the Navy Moose, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret migrations to the watering hole, and I have over 300 confirmed tramplings. I am trained in moose warfare and I’m the top mounter in the entire United Moose armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another fleshbag. I will wipe you the fuck out with goring the likes of which has never been seen before in this forest, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of moose across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the stampede, human. The stampede that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can trample you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hooves. Not only am I extensively trained in unhooved combat, but I have access to the entire herd of the United States Moose Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your little miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you could have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you moosedamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, human.