Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search

hide menu

xxELITExx

xxELITExx Avatar Level 209 Comments: Comedic Genius
Offline
Send mail to xxELITExx Block xxELITExx Invite xxELITExx to be your friend flag avatar
Last status update:
-
Personal Info
Gender: male
Age: 67
Date Signed Up:4/01/2010
Last Login:12/07/2014
Location:Bratislava
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Thumbs: 3382 total,  4004 ,  622
Comment Thumbs: 1107 total,  1853 ,  746
Content Level Progress: 91% (91/100)
Level 133 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry → Level 134 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry
Comment Level Progress: 90% (9/10)
Level 209 Comments: Comedic Genius → Level 210 Comments: Comedic Genius
Subscribers:0
Content Views:104975
Times Content Favorited:346 times
Total Comments Made:1393
FJ Points:264
Favorite Tags: Insanity Wolf (5) | Awesome (2) | battle (2) | epic (2) | kitchen (2) | Pipboy (2) | Signs (2)

latest user's comments

#29 - 98 M3 track ready. i will own one of these someday. 03/08/2014 on Post your dream car 0
#21 - ******* midday and i yawned twice lol 03/02/2014 on domino effect 0
#5 - HA! 02/27/2014 on Mother of Signature 0
#7943599 - god i hate yolo  [+] (1 new reply) 02/27/2014 on autism autism autism autism 0
User avatar #7943601 - overjoyed (02/27/2014) [-]
oh ok.
#84 - all of my zelda skill i owe to my gma and dad 02/23/2014 on If games where relatives 0
#39 - i modified this list a little but i saved it in my broken …  [+] (1 new reply) 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse +1
User avatar #42 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Yup, I feel bad for people in a Z-endworld scenario who don't do things like count shots or prepare for hits and end up getting eaten alive because they didn't anticipate things like that.
#40 - people dont usually think moose are that vicious, but they are… 02/23/2014 on attack on moose +5
#37 - one of my favorites, i find it the most useful  [+] (3 new replies) 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse +1
User avatar #38 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Few obvious problems with this one, first, it's from Zombie-Land, second, vehicles are like big beacons saying, "HEY ZOMBIES, FOLLOW ME, I'LL STOP EVENTUALLY." Because those ghouls won't stop because you blew their legs off, what makes you think they'll stop because you're faster than them? Second, unless you live within walking distance of a gun store or own plenty already, weapons will be long since gone. So having two or more lethal weapons is unlikely, the best you can do is outrun them, which is why cardio is correct in this. Outrun, find a safe place, stay quiet, stay down. And for the sleep portion, as I said, above ground at least 12 feet with no easy way up.
User avatar #39 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
i modified this list a little but i saved it in my broken fucking ipod. it does have some good points in it though. the calculus one was pretty good. alot of people dont think of the little things like that.
User avatar #42 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Yup, I feel bad for people in a Z-endworld scenario who don't do things like count shots or prepare for hits and end up getting eaten alive because they didn't anticipate things like that.
#34 - Oh yeah, that goes for anything really. Thats why im going int…  [+] (5 new replies) 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse +1
User avatar #35 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Roads mean travel, travel means Zeds on the road and trashed cars. Avoid roads and sleep above ground, always have an escape plan and always know where you are. Always be armed and use silent weapons, basic things that people leave out in their survival plans.
User avatar #37 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
nerdfighters.ning.com/forum/topics/rules-for-surviving-the-zombie

one of my favorites, i find it the most useful
User avatar #38 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Few obvious problems with this one, first, it's from Zombie-Land, second, vehicles are like big beacons saying, "HEY ZOMBIES, FOLLOW ME, I'LL STOP EVENTUALLY." Because those ghouls won't stop because you blew their legs off, what makes you think they'll stop because you're faster than them? Second, unless you live within walking distance of a gun store or own plenty already, weapons will be long since gone. So having two or more lethal weapons is unlikely, the best you can do is outrun them, which is why cardio is correct in this. Outrun, find a safe place, stay quiet, stay down. And for the sleep portion, as I said, above ground at least 12 feet with no easy way up.
User avatar #39 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
i modified this list a little but i saved it in my broken fucking ipod. it does have some good points in it though. the calculus one was pretty good. alot of people dont think of the little things like that.
User avatar #42 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Yup, I feel bad for people in a Z-endworld scenario who don't do things like count shots or prepare for hits and end up getting eaten alive because they didn't anticipate things like that.
#32 - Yeah me and my buddie are have plans for **** lik…  [+] (7 new replies) 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse +1
User avatar #33 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
I have a tip for survival preparation, when packing food, when you think you have enough for a year, double the amount, food goes by fuckin' fast.
User avatar #34 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
Oh yeah, that goes for anything really. Thats why im going into the backwoods. lots of small animals and deer are really popular up there. they like headlights up there
User avatar #35 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Roads mean travel, travel means Zeds on the road and trashed cars. Avoid roads and sleep above ground, always have an escape plan and always know where you are. Always be armed and use silent weapons, basic things that people leave out in their survival plans.
User avatar #37 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
nerdfighters.ning.com/forum/topics/rules-for-surviving-the-zombie

one of my favorites, i find it the most useful
User avatar #38 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Few obvious problems with this one, first, it's from Zombie-Land, second, vehicles are like big beacons saying, "HEY ZOMBIES, FOLLOW ME, I'LL STOP EVENTUALLY." Because those ghouls won't stop because you blew their legs off, what makes you think they'll stop because you're faster than them? Second, unless you live within walking distance of a gun store or own plenty already, weapons will be long since gone. So having two or more lethal weapons is unlikely, the best you can do is outrun them, which is why cardio is correct in this. Outrun, find a safe place, stay quiet, stay down. And for the sleep portion, as I said, above ground at least 12 feet with no easy way up.
User avatar #39 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
i modified this list a little but i saved it in my broken fucking ipod. it does have some good points in it though. the calculus one was pretty good. alot of people dont think of the little things like that.
User avatar #42 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Yup, I feel bad for people in a Z-endworld scenario who don't do things like count shots or prepare for hits and end up getting eaten alive because they didn't anticipate things like that.
#30 - Valid point. either way im taking my guns and im head…  [+] (9 new replies) 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse +1
User avatar #31 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
That'd be your best bet if every human being in the scenario who wasn't having a mental breakdown didn't have the same idea. Your highest chance of survival is to go WAAAAY High north, like, Canada north, past the snow line, and hold out through the winter. Anything not properly prepared will freeze, but you'd also have trouble surviving so... Bring some friends! You may run out of food.
User avatar #32 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
Yeah me and my buddie are have plans for shit like this. Not like hardcore plans, we're not paranoid lol but we have a general idea of where we're going, who we're taking, and what we're going to bring. for multiple scenarios.
User avatar #33 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
I have a tip for survival preparation, when packing food, when you think you have enough for a year, double the amount, food goes by fuckin' fast.
User avatar #34 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
Oh yeah, that goes for anything really. Thats why im going into the backwoods. lots of small animals and deer are really popular up there. they like headlights up there
User avatar #35 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Roads mean travel, travel means Zeds on the road and trashed cars. Avoid roads and sleep above ground, always have an escape plan and always know where you are. Always be armed and use silent weapons, basic things that people leave out in their survival plans.
User avatar #37 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
nerdfighters.ning.com/forum/topics/rules-for-surviving-the-zombie

one of my favorites, i find it the most useful
User avatar #38 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Few obvious problems with this one, first, it's from Zombie-Land, second, vehicles are like big beacons saying, "HEY ZOMBIES, FOLLOW ME, I'LL STOP EVENTUALLY." Because those ghouls won't stop because you blew their legs off, what makes you think they'll stop because you're faster than them? Second, unless you live within walking distance of a gun store or own plenty already, weapons will be long since gone. So having two or more lethal weapons is unlikely, the best you can do is outrun them, which is why cardio is correct in this. Outrun, find a safe place, stay quiet, stay down. And for the sleep portion, as I said, above ground at least 12 feet with no easy way up.
User avatar #39 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
i modified this list a little but i saved it in my broken fucking ipod. it does have some good points in it though. the calculus one was pretty good. alot of people dont think of the little things like that.
User avatar #42 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Yup, I feel bad for people in a Z-endworld scenario who don't do things like count shots or prepare for hits and end up getting eaten alive because they didn't anticipate things like that.
#28 - about the military aspect. they would be useful because there …  [+] (11 new replies) 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse +2
User avatar #29 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
The military would prove a good stand, but in anything except for minor skirmishes with maybe forty to two hundred Zs? And if they had tanks and artillery more than a few thousand? Even the best sharp shooters have a breaking point. And some will get through, and soldiers will start dying, and when soldiers freak out, the battle is over.
User avatar #30 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
Valid point.

either way im taking my guns and im heading up north into bumfuck nowhere MN haha
User avatar #31 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
That'd be your best bet if every human being in the scenario who wasn't having a mental breakdown didn't have the same idea. Your highest chance of survival is to go WAAAAY High north, like, Canada north, past the snow line, and hold out through the winter. Anything not properly prepared will freeze, but you'd also have trouble surviving so... Bring some friends! You may run out of food.
User avatar #32 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
Yeah me and my buddie are have plans for shit like this. Not like hardcore plans, we're not paranoid lol but we have a general idea of where we're going, who we're taking, and what we're going to bring. for multiple scenarios.
User avatar #33 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
I have a tip for survival preparation, when packing food, when you think you have enough for a year, double the amount, food goes by fuckin' fast.
User avatar #34 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
Oh yeah, that goes for anything really. Thats why im going into the backwoods. lots of small animals and deer are really popular up there. they like headlights up there
User avatar #35 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Roads mean travel, travel means Zeds on the road and trashed cars. Avoid roads and sleep above ground, always have an escape plan and always know where you are. Always be armed and use silent weapons, basic things that people leave out in their survival plans.
User avatar #37 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
nerdfighters.ning.com/forum/topics/rules-for-surviving-the-zombie

one of my favorites, i find it the most useful
User avatar #38 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Few obvious problems with this one, first, it's from Zombie-Land, second, vehicles are like big beacons saying, "HEY ZOMBIES, FOLLOW ME, I'LL STOP EVENTUALLY." Because those ghouls won't stop because you blew their legs off, what makes you think they'll stop because you're faster than them? Second, unless you live within walking distance of a gun store or own plenty already, weapons will be long since gone. So having two or more lethal weapons is unlikely, the best you can do is outrun them, which is why cardio is correct in this. Outrun, find a safe place, stay quiet, stay down. And for the sleep portion, as I said, above ground at least 12 feet with no easy way up.
User avatar #39 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
i modified this list a little but i saved it in my broken fucking ipod. it does have some good points in it though. the calculus one was pretty good. alot of people dont think of the little things like that.
User avatar #42 - noobtankz (02/23/2014) [-]
Yup, I feel bad for people in a Z-endworld scenario who don't do things like count shots or prepare for hits and end up getting eaten alive because they didn't anticipate things like that.
#27 - so many people say they would be survivors in a zombie apocaly… 02/23/2014 on Possible zombie apocalypse 0
#71 - nope just a dick 02/23/2014 on Single for too long 0
#66 - This is completely accurate. I just torched a possible relatio…  [+] (2 new replies) 02/23/2014 on Single for too long 0
User avatar #70 - chodestroker (02/23/2014) [-]
You're such a badass. Lol
User avatar #71 - xxELITExx (02/23/2014) [-]
nope just a dick
#4 - try not to have a wet dream when in a high school classroom '_' 02/20/2014 on Have you ever been this... 0
#12 - im actually buying one of those guns tomorrow haha  [+] (1 new reply) 02/20/2014 on gun gif with 3D effect 0
User avatar #14 - roliga (02/20/2014) [-]
I'm so sorry
#11 - **** i wasnt logged in  [+] (1 new reply) 02/20/2014 on Why Everybody Loves Black... -1
#24 - anonymous (02/20/2014) [-]
nobody cares.
#2 - YES¡ 02/19/2014 on Minnesnowta 0
#43 - Comment deleted 02/13/2014 on ohgod 0
#42 - Comment deleted 02/13/2014 on ohgod 0
#41 - Comment deleted 02/13/2014 on ohgod 0
#6 - Comment deleted 02/12/2014 on OH MY...... 0
#11 - good to know 02/12/2014 on how cold? +4
#2 - glocks dont have kick. not ever their 45.acp  [+] (7 new replies) 02/12/2014 on ohgod +3
User avatar #20 - jjamesgordon (02/12/2014) [-]
Glocks aren't all .45 ACP. I own a 17, 19, and 26. Those three are 9mm.
My Glock 20 is a 10mm. Just saying.
#43 - xxELITExx has deleted their comment.
#42 - xxELITExx has deleted their comment.
#41 - xxELITExx has deleted their comment.
User avatar #4 - pizzaweed (02/12/2014) [-]
it's the only pun I could think of
User avatar #7 - pyromanicturtlez (02/12/2014) [-]
And it made me recoil in horror.
#37 - atma (02/13/2014) [-]

Comments(0):

 

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
No comments!
 Friends (0)