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turtletroll

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Date Signed Up:7/18/2012
Last Login:3/31/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#257
Highest Content Rank:#1834
Highest Comment Rank:#79
Content Thumbs: 4257 total,  4966 ,  709
Comment Thumbs: 30480 total,  32777 ,  2297
Content Level Progress: 22% (22/100)
Level 139 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry → Level 140 Content: Faptastic
Comment Level Progress: 4.2% (42/1000)
Level 325 Comments: Covered In Thumbs → Level 326 Comments: Covered In Thumbs
Subscribers:4
Content Views:289820
Times Content Favorited:288 times
Total Comments Made:7267
FJ Points:16204
Favorite Tags: OC (3)

latest user's comments

#43 - What league are you if you are 30? I like talking abo…  [+] (5 new replies) 03/16/2015 on Playing Ranked with friends... +1
User avatar #46 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
I'm still level 26 on NA, but 30 on my EUW account. However, I don't play ranked (not until I manage to gather five men for team ranked to make it less serious) since I feel like people take it too serious.
User avatar #47 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Yeah that's true.

I got reported for being a troll when I picked nautilus jungle today but I finished 7/1/22
User avatar #52 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
Wat

Nautilus jungle is the epitome of jungling
User avatar #53 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
He's not like tier 1 but still especially after that score to say i was "troll picking" is insane.

And this is in gold where you think some people would know a thing or two about the game
User avatar #57 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
Yeah he's decent, but I prefer him as support. Anything with hooks and other forms of CC works as support.

Also, I gonna go bed. For real this time. Add MarsBlade on NA if you want to play and have some fun experiments.
#10 - Just wonder what you think about the new wutang album 03/16/2015 on wutangswords's profile 0
#42 - i could maybe see that working with your voidling attacking wh… 03/16/2015 on Playing Ranked with friends... +1
#38 - Ad malz doesnt really make much sense considering non…  [+] (8 new replies) 03/16/2015 on Playing Ranked with friends... +1
User avatar #39 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
Voidlings! You want to spawn one a few seconds before you're gong to gank. It's a bit more difficult than your average jungler, but I have the highest success rate with him in the jungle. The voidlings scale 1:1 with your AD, so having about 220-250 AD on him is more than just sufficient. Plus, you still do decent magic damage without ability power, and his E is enough to finish off enemies early on.

As I said, I'm not the best player, but if there is one thing I'm good at it is AD Arab mode.
User avatar #43 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
What league are you if you are 30?

I like talking about new champ roles
User avatar #46 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
I'm still level 26 on NA, but 30 on my EUW account. However, I don't play ranked (not until I manage to gather five men for team ranked to make it less serious) since I feel like people take it too serious.
User avatar #47 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Yeah that's true.

I got reported for being a troll when I picked nautilus jungle today but I finished 7/1/22
User avatar #52 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
Wat

Nautilus jungle is the epitome of jungling
User avatar #53 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
He's not like tier 1 but still especially after that score to say i was "troll picking" is insane.

And this is in gold where you think some people would know a thing or two about the game
User avatar #57 - greedtheavaricious (03/16/2015) [-]
Yeah he's decent, but I prefer him as support. Anything with hooks and other forms of CC works as support.

Also, I gonna go bed. For real this time. Add MarsBlade on NA if you want to play and have some fun experiments.
User avatar #42 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
i could maybe see that working with your voidling attacking while you ult.

Theoretically I don't see it working at the higher leagues because it must lack in team fight potential.

Zed jungle is fun but his laning phase is so strong it seems a bit off to take that from him.

And the jungle meta right now tends to be tankier more cc engagey champs not assassins so with both him and malz it's definitely not meta but you can still do it if you try to play the pick game
#2744 - The mighty konradkurze now a anon kek  [+] (16 new replies) 03/15/2015 on turtletroll's profile 0
#2745 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
only using anon at home
i log in when out at a cyber cafe

so how are you mr chav
#2746 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
how am i
#2747 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
youre always broke
youre british
#2748 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Good thing I only live on cheap cider and chips
#2749 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
fukken cockney
#2750 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Take that back right now
#2751 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
#2752 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
being a northern socialist republican and being called a cockney
#2753 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
> socialist republican
> russia was united soviet socialist republic [ussr]
> communism was created by karl marx observing british hippies
> aka british invented communism

> turtletroll confirmed COMMUNIST
User avatar #2754 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
"turtle stoner lel"

Hippies are stoners
#2755 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
BEHOLD THE COMMUNIST TURTLE
User avatar #2756 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Must collect more crumpets for the motherland
#2757 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
red alert 1 when USSR takes england
skip to 34:00

C&C Red Alert (Soviet story)
User avatar #2758 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Those russian girls I talk to are actually KGB agents.

All comes together
#2759 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
they wanted to link up with the communist turtle and bring the UK into the USSR
User avatar #2760 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
United Komrades
#11 - I think you are great compared to the other themed accounts  [+] (1 new reply) 03/15/2015 on ISIS vs North Korea +4
User avatar #12 - compared (03/15/2015) [-]
Thanks!
#81 - I imagine that tasting like mt dew 03/15/2015 on I hope this one wins 0
#89 - Listen to dont stop believing by journey 03/15/2015 on Rednexball 0
#4 - nerd 03/15/2015 on (untitled) +4
#170 - Picture 03/15/2015 on /b/ +11
#21 - ISIS Thats not even a valid question 03/14/2015 on Feminism in action #259 +11
#14 - im saying in real life though. Get caught doing some…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/14/2015 on Words are my weapons 0
User avatar #16 - emiyashirou (03/14/2015) [-]
The law of mistake for one. Thank god I only need to have a basic understanding of law for my course, the law of mistake is convoluted as fuck. God save all the law students' souls.
#2741 - they released a shoegaze rock song called On GP You …  [+] (1 new reply) 03/14/2015 on turtletroll's profile 0
#2742 - anonymous (03/14/2015) [-]
listened to 20 seconds
ears bled
shit song
#169 - thanks m8  [+] (1 new reply) 03/14/2015 on Ouo 0
User avatar #170 - jokeface (03/14/2015) [-]
It's actually kind of adorable if you can find it with sound. I watched it twice.
#34 - JUST ONE MORE TIME  [+] (1 new reply) 03/14/2015 on Rednexball +9
User avatar #36 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
SOME'LL WIN
#33 - PAYING ANYTHING TO ROLL THE DICE  [+] (1 new reply) 03/14/2015 on Rednexball +9
User avatar #35 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
JUST ONE. MORE. TIME
#9 - What laws could they even say I saw a guy get into a …  [+] (3 new replies) 03/14/2015 on Words are my weapons +4
User avatar #13 - dbBlues (03/14/2015) [-]
Well the girl in the content tried to invoke the freedom of information act to get photocopies of notes from her classmate.
User avatar #14 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
im saying in real life though.

Get caught doing something wrong and what law could you possibly bring up to protect yourself
User avatar #16 - emiyashirou (03/14/2015) [-]
The law of mistake for one. Thank god I only need to have a basic understanding of law for my course, the law of mistake is convoluted as fuck. God save all the law students' souls.
#14 - JUST A CITY BOY  [+] (25 new replies) 03/14/2015 on Rednexball +18
User avatar #17 - ericarthurblair (03/14/2015) [-]
Born and raised in South Detroit
#18 - telfyr (03/14/2015) [-]
HE TOOK THE MIDNIGHT TRAIN GOING ANYWHERE!
#19 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
A SINGER IN A SMOKEY ROOM
User avatar #20 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
THE SMELL OF WINE AND CHEAP PERFUME
User avatar #21 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
FOR A SMILE THEY CAN SHARE THE NIGHT
User avatar #22 - babydingo (03/14/2015) [-]
It goes on and on and on and on
#23 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
STRANGERS



WAITING
#49 - superblade (03/14/2015) [-]
Mfw all these comment
User avatar #89 - turtletroll (03/15/2015) [-]
Listen to dont stop believing by journey
User avatar #25 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
UP AND DOWN THE BOULEVAAAAARD
User avatar #26 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
their SHADOWS



SEARCHING
in the niiiiiiight
User avatar #27 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
STREET. LIGHT. PEOPLE
User avatar #28 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
Livin' just to FIND EMOTION
User avatar #29 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
HIDIN SOMEWHERE IN THE NIIIIIIIIIGHT
User avatar #37 - hidin (03/14/2015) [-]
motherfucker its 3:40 pm, get your god damned facts straight.
User avatar #38 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
HIDIN SOMEWHERE IN THE MID AFTERNOON*
User avatar #39 - hidin (03/14/2015) [-]
THAT'S BETTER
User avatar #30 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
WORKIN' HARD TO GET MY FILL
User avatar #31 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
EVERYBODY WANTS A THRIILL
User avatar #33 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
PAYING ANYTHING TO ROLL THE DICE
User avatar #35 - mymommasallama (03/14/2015) [-]
JUST ONE. MORE. TIME
User avatar #32 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
PAYIN' ANYTHING TO ROLL THE DICE
User avatar #34 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
JUST ONE MORE TIME
User avatar #36 - friedgreenpomatoes (03/14/2015) [-]
SOME'LL WIN
User avatar #24 - babydingo (03/14/2015) [-]
*DUH, DUH*
#148 - Sound doesn't play on this video for me  [+] (3 new replies) 03/14/2015 on Ouo 0
User avatar #168 - jokeface (03/14/2015) [-]
Standard little girl voice declaring that whoever watches this is her new best friend and can never leave, threatening to find you if you try to escape, being generically creepy.
User avatar #169 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
thanks m8
User avatar #170 - jokeface (03/14/2015) [-]
It's actually kind of adorable if you can find it with sound. I watched it twice.
#33 - It's false advertising is what it is you can't even g…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/14/2015 on ...the cat did it 0
User avatar #34 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Thats bogus
#31 - Picture  [+] (3 new replies) 03/14/2015 on ...the cat did it 0
#32 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
That's a bit strange.
User avatar #33 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
It's false advertising is what it is

you can't even get to the end of a rainbow
User avatar #34 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Thats bogus
#29 - You never tried to get the leprechauns treasure?  [+] (5 new replies) 03/14/2015 on ...the cat did it 0
User avatar #30 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Who's treasure?
#32 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
That's a bit strange.
User avatar #33 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
It's false advertising is what it is

you can't even get to the end of a rainbow
User avatar #34 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Thats bogus
#27 - you can never reach the end of the rainbow and get the pot of gold  [+] (7 new replies) 03/14/2015 on ...the cat did it 0
User avatar #28 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
wait that's a thing?
User avatar #29 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
You never tried to get the leprechauns treasure?
User avatar #30 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Who's treasure?
#32 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
That's a bit strange.
User avatar #33 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
It's false advertising is what it is

you can't even get to the end of a rainbow
User avatar #34 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Thats bogus
#25 - oops meant turtles > faggot birds  [+] (9 new replies) 03/14/2015 on ...the cat did it 0
#26 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Oh.
What's wrong with rainbows?
User avatar #27 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
you can never reach the end of the rainbow and get the pot of gold
User avatar #28 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
wait that's a thing?
User avatar #29 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
You never tried to get the leprechauns treasure?
User avatar #30 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Who's treasure?
#32 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
That's a bit strange.
User avatar #33 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
It's false advertising is what it is

you can't even get to the end of a rainbow
User avatar #34 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Thats bogus
#23 - turtles < faggot birds  [+] (11 new replies) 03/14/2015 on ...the cat did it 0
#24 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
"Turtles are Less Than faggot birds"

Welll I mean I guess. I mean I wouldn't say birds in general are better than turtles or the other way round, but faggot birds is oddly specific. I guess they're better in the rainbow department, but I don't see how thats exactly fair to turtles.
User avatar #25 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
oops

meant turtles > faggot birds
#26 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Oh.
What's wrong with rainbows?
User avatar #27 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
you can never reach the end of the rainbow and get the pot of gold
User avatar #28 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
wait that's a thing?
User avatar #29 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
You never tried to get the leprechauns treasure?
User avatar #30 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Who's treasure?
#32 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
That's a bit strange.
User avatar #33 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
It's false advertising is what it is

you can't even get to the end of a rainbow
User avatar #34 - mcburd (03/14/2015) [-]
Thats bogus

items

Total unique items point value: 6100 / Total items point value: 218800

Comments(2849):

[ 2849 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#2953 - rageblade (13 hours ago) [-]
**rageblade used "*roll Magic 8-Ball*"**
**rageblade rolls It is certain**
should i find Turtle a british Overly Attached Girlfriend
User avatar #2954 to #2953 - turtletroll (12 hours ago) [-]
better a psycho one then no gf at all
#2955 to #2954 - rageblade (12 hours ago) [-]
unless they have british vags

seriously WHY does england have the highest occurrence of this
User avatar #2956 to #2955 - turtletroll (12 hours ago) [-]
British teethcare is notoriously bad

When we eat out a girl they just fall out and get stuck there
#2957 to #2956 - rageblade (12 hours ago) [-]
hmmm reminds me
manga had a girl who fits british image

undergroundanimation.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Wicked_City-05.jpg
#2915 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
*dresses turtle up in one of elton johns sparkly outfits*
User avatar #2936 to #2915 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
I got a player in fifa 13 who had 98 pace.

The rest of his skills were **** so I just discarded him thinking he wasnt worth much

Realize later that I couldve bought an entire great team with what he was worth
#2937 to #2936 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
**rageblade used "*roll Magic 8-Ball*"**
**rageblade rolls Signs point to yes**
is turtletroll really Scott Sterling
User avatar #2938 to #2937 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
Greatest goalkeeper in the world

No ball gets past his impenetrable face of steel
#2939 to #2938 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
if only he had a turtle shell...hed never have gotten the multiple concussions
User avatar #2940 to #2939 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
SHELLS DONT COVER FACES STUPID
#2941 to #2940 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
DUH
thats why sterling could have curled up INSIDE his shell till the game ended
User avatar #2942 to #2941 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
What kind of keeper would that make him though?
User avatar #2944 to #2943 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
Well franklins a cunt anyway
#2945 to #2944 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
CUNT
completely
unappreciated
Nice
Turtle
User avatar #2946 to #2945 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
You dont have to spell it out for me

what else could i have meant
#2947 to #2946 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
yer still a cockney m8
User avatar #2948 to #2947 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
And you're west german techno trash
#2949 to #2948 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
and youre a little peasant living in a cottage in the country
User avatar #2950 to #2949 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
I'd rather live there then the city i'm in now

Lowest average IQ in the north west
Lowest life expectancy in the north west
One of the highest crime rates in the north west
One of the most non white cities in the whole of the UK
#2951 to #2950 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
YOU LIVE IN DETROIT?
User avatar #2952 to #2951 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
The english version

I went to the worst high school in the city aswell

I'm surprised I even got C grades
User avatar #2916 to #2915 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
*sets fire to self*
#2917 to #2916 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
fire = flame = flaming = turtle is a flaming homo
User avatar #2918 to #2917 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
a gay mind is a gay kind
#2919 to #2918 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
so why dont you accept being gay

british be gay
User avatar #2920 to #2919 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
your greatest leader bismarck had a butt plug on his head
#2921 to #2920 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
actually more like a rhino horn

i saw a comic where when germans ran out of ammo in WW1....the biggest guy in the group started picking up his men and throwing them like spears at the brits and impaling them on the helmet spikes
User avatar #2922 to #2921 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
Is that why you ******* put up such a fight.

Run out of ammo so you just become the ammo
#2923 to #2922 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
while you brits wore helmets shaped like UFOs

original neckbeards
User avatar #2924 to #2923 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
We had them shaped like that so the aliens knew we were friends
#2925 to #2924 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
britis:
love the alien anal probing so much they make helmets to attract their attention

so fukken gay
User avatar #2926 to #2925 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
Why do you think the muricans got nuclear bombs before you

the aliens
#2927 to #2926 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
england jelly

you take the anal probes and yet still get nukes AFTER usa
User avatar #2928 to #2927 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
implying america hasn't taken the most probes

they were doing it way before they realized they could get nukes from it
#2929 to #2928 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
well question is...have americans actually been probed or has that all just been hype from retarded rednecks drunk on moonshine and ******* each other and saying "aliens did it"
User avatar #2930 to #2929 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
probably the latter

gets drunk and gets destroyed by sister wearing a strapon

"must be dem darn aleyuns wit der gawd blasted incest rays"
#2931 to #2930 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
sister?

arent most rednecks who talk about aliens MALE?

*southpark gay pile*
User avatar #2932 to #2931 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
honestly when youre so fat gender just becomes indistinguishable
#2933 to #2932 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
and dont forget the inbreeding
kinda surprised the rednecks dont have flippers for limbs or antennas on their heads by now
User avatar #2934 to #2933 - turtletroll (03/30/2015) [-]
"in some parts of the world people are screaming REVOLUTION REVOLUTION. In Alabama they're screaming EVOLUTION EVOLUTION WE WANT OUR THUMBS" -Bill hicks
#2935 to #2934 - rageblade (03/30/2015) [-]
and in england...all the screaming is over sports games
User avatar #2900 - MasterMario (03/27/2015) [-]
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
User avatar #2902 to #2901 - MasterMario (03/27/2015) [-]
SIT IN THE DARK AND PONDER HOW I'M FIT TO MAKE THE BOTTOM FALL THROUGH THE FLOOR AND THEY ALL
FALL
DOOOOOOWN
YAH
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES
User avatar #2903 to #2902 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
OUT OF THE SHADOWS BARRAGE OF WITCH TONGUE
COBRA SPIT OVER APOCALYPTIC CULT KILLER CAULDREN SMOKE
STOMP MUSIC SERIOUSLY YAH
User avatar #2904 to #2903 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
So how about that Jenny Death holy **** AOTY
User avatar #2905 to #2904 - turtletroll (03/28/2015) [-]
The powers that B as a whole is ******* 10/10
#2906 to #2905 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
>when Bjork records original vocals for Death Grips
User avatar #2907 to #2906 - turtletroll (03/28/2015) [-]
And her new album aswell though

Been a good year for music and were only 3 months in
#2908 to #2907 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
>when Bjork tells you to have a sad cum

Also yes it has been a good year
User avatar #2909 to #2908 - turtletroll (03/28/2015) [-]
Do you like Kendricks new album?

That's another 10/10 imo

******* rare to get 2 near perfect albums in one month
User avatar #2912 to #2909 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
holy **** TPAB is amazing
User avatar #2913 to #2912 - turtletroll (03/28/2015) [-]
Yeah I can't decide which one I like more.

TPAB or TPTB
User avatar #2914 to #2913 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
I think it's a tie for me
User avatar #2911 to #2909 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
Just finished GKMC. Pretty damn good.
Time for TPAB
User avatar #2910 to #2909 - MasterMario (03/28/2015) [-]
I haven't listened to it yet I've been but I've been meaning to. I have to listen to Good Kid M.A.A.D. City first though. I'll probably do that right now after I finish listening to Jenny Death for the 17238283562856th time this week.
#2885 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
gay marriage will lead to people ******* turtles
User avatar #2886 to #2885 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
implying we'd let a ******* lower class specie like humans bring us down like that
#2887 to #2886 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
whats your opinion on bats
User avatar #2888 to #2887 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
Gives you diseases.

Otherwise they're like bird dogs
#2889 to #2888 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
ill be sure to have bats squirt guano all over your turtles
User avatar #2890 to #2889 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
We have shells that protect us from all diseases and attacks.

Nice try
#2891 to #2890 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
so youre okay with stuff ******** on your clothes as long as it doesnt touch skin?
User avatar #2892 to #2891 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
We're turtles.

We live in the sea unlike those pleb tortoises. The mother ocean will clean our shells.
#2893 to #2892 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
unless you go near american waters

then your people are ******
User avatar #2894 to #2893 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
Sneaky jews and their sneaky plastic traps looking like jellyfish and ****
#2895 to #2894 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
so you'll need schnizel syrianassassin and i to help remove kikes
User avatar #2896 to #2895 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
We took hitlers gene seed and will bring him back when the time is right.

They will have their day
#2897 to #2896 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
Schnizel already has space marines on the way
User avatar #2898 to #2897 - turtletroll (03/27/2015) [-]
And we have their leader.

It's all coming together. Snizel will probably get killed for being a bosnian but he'll cross that bridge when he comes to it
#2899 to #2898 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
idk
his father survived the yugoslav wars....sniz was raised by a survivor
#2884 - rageblade (03/27/2015) [-]
**rageblade used "*roll cah answer*"**
**rageblade rolls Anne Frank.**
how gay is turtletroll
User avatar #2882 to #2880 - turtletroll (03/25/2015) [-]
I got 4 votes

Im surprised that many people know me
#2883 to #2882 - rageblade (03/26/2015) [-]
possibly joshlol ************ lordgeneral and another brit wanting you in the teacup gay pile
#2879 - rageblade has deleted their comment [-]
#2875 - rageblade (03/24/2015) [-]
oi m8y
wake the bloody hell up and talk with me
User avatar #2876 to #2875 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Are you kidding

I went to sleep at like 7pm I was so tired. **** hanging around until 3 in the morning to talk to your banned ass
#2878 to #2876 - rageblade (03/25/2015) [-]
sleep is for the weak you git
#2862 - misskayla ONLINE (03/24/2015) [-]
Treat me well.
User avatar #2849 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Been watching March Madness?
User avatar #2873 to #2849 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Im definitely going into mechanical either way but still it's irritating because electronics is obviously going to come into the tests and our coursework in that class is graded aswell
User avatar #2874 to #2873 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
What components other than power source, resistors, and switches have you used? Keep in mind speaker, LEDs etc are all essentially resistors.
User avatar #2850 to #2849 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
We don't ever really get american football here

The superbowl is the only time I ever see it on TV
User avatar #2851 to #2850 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Psst. March Madness is basketball.
User avatar #2853 to #2851 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Well then we definitely don't get that

Don't really like basketball either to be honest
User avatar #2855 to #2853 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
68 teams enter, 1 leaves.
User avatar #2856 to #2855 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Basketball just doesnt interest me

I just find it really boring to watch
User avatar #2857 to #2856 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
I bet your college doesn't even have sports.
User avatar #2858 to #2857 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Got a football team I think
#2859 to #2858 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
"You think"

>Not having a 85000 seat stadium on your campus.
User avatar #2860 to #2859 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Most people either play for a professional team or just like playing for fun
User avatar #2861 to #2860 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Here in America we force players to play in college for at least 3 years before going to the pros. But hey, at least they are compensated with a college education.
User avatar #2863 to #2861 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Professional teams pick up people from really young ages for training.

My dad's friends son is 6 and had offers from manchester united and a lot of other big teams for training.
User avatar #2864 to #2863 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Are British colleges even fun?
User avatar #2865 to #2864 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
its almost like school

I can walk there in 20 minutes and im only in for 3 days
User avatar #2866 to #2865 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Well. I'm in there for 5. But only one class on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. And I live on campus. And I skip on a lot of classes. I remember when I used to feel guilty about it.
User avatar #2867 to #2866 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
Tomorrow i'm only in for like 3 hours

The other two days are until 5.
User avatar #2868 to #2867 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Wouldn't happen to know robotics would you? Gotta test tomorrow lol. Only 4 more test until I am done with tests forever. Unless I decide to go back to grad school sometime in the future.
User avatar #2869 to #2868 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
I'm doing engineering and the electronics side is so let down by the teacher I don't know a ******* thing.

If he knew what he was doing I might know a thing or two but honestly at this point I still don't know how to make basic circuits
User avatar #2870 to #2869 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Well, I could help you with that. Of course I am Mechanical so I only know basic circuits. Are you talking physics or a dedicated electronics class?
User avatar #2871 to #2870 - turtletroll (03/24/2015) [-]
I honestly don't know. He just throws a circuit board at us with pieces and we just solder them in. We've all complained about him a hundred times but the college has done **** all
User avatar #2872 to #2871 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
Sounds like electronics. All you need to know is the KCL, KVL, V=IR, and P=IV. Once you start throwing in OP amps and micro controllers it gets harder though.
User avatar #2854 to #2853 - damping (03/24/2015) [-]
But the madness! Upsets, brackets destroyed!
#2848 - anonymous (03/22/2015) [-]
*prods turtles tummy*

you porker
#2843 - anonymous (03/21/2015) [-]
**anonymous used "*roll cah answer*"**
**anonymous rolls Handcuffs, without the key.**
how fat is turtletroll
User avatar #2844 to #2843 - turtletroll (03/21/2015) [-]
So my wrists are so fat if you put on handcuffs they are just stuck on tight
#2845 to #2844 - anonymous (03/21/2015) [-]
youre so fat the handcuffs barely fit around one of your fingers

turtletroll is actually american
User avatar #2846 to #2845 - turtletroll (03/21/2015) [-]
No im british so only my wrists are fat
#2847 to #2846 - anonymous (03/22/2015) [-]
< turtletroll in a nutshell
#2840 - rageblade (03/20/2015) [-]
and then this one time......when turtletroll was at a pub...and the bartender needed to make a drink that had lime juice....he stabbed turtletroll and collected his limey blood juice to mix in the drink

fukken crumpet munching limey teacup
User avatar #2841 to #2840 - turtletroll (03/20/2015) [-]
God I hate it when that happens

The amount of times i've been stabbed for tea or lime is insane
User avatar #2835 - Epicgetguy (03/19/2015) [-]
Psst, hey.

Jenny Death Now.
User avatar #2836 to #2835 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
DEAR LAWDY

Im not ready
User avatar #2839 to #2837 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
Turned off though holy ****
User avatar #2838 to #2837 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
Im so hyped

Been waiting 10 months for this and I preordered the album
User avatar #2834 to #2833 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
"island stealing **** " seems more appropriate for someone british
#2821 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
Hitler: we remove gypsies
Churchill: nope...dont do it
Hitler: we gun do it anyway
Churchill: okay invasion time
Hitler: WTF BRO
Eisenhauer: RAPE TIME
Stalin: SPITROAST GERMANY
Hitler: ****** bandwagoners
User avatar #2823 to #2821 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
More like

"Dont you invade poland"
"We got a reason doe"
"u wot m8"

Then japan commits sudoku by attacking america and then hitler goes and declares war on russia because it was inevitable

And the Italians. Holy **** even with german support they couldnt beat Greece. They are ******* useless
#2824 to #2823 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
they left mirrors all over the place and the italians stopped to look at themselves instead of fight

vain twats
User avatar #2825 to #2824 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
"Lets just leave some tomatos and pepper as a trap"
"mama mia letsa make some spaghetti"
#2826 to #2825 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
easy way to beat italians

< hang some question mark bricks just above head height and watch the italians bang their heads into them trying to get coins or mushrooms out of them
User avatar #2827 to #2826 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
Open a coffee shop and cover it in mines

Watch them run to their death like moths to a flame
#2828 to #2827 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
nah id get too many white milennial girls in there before italians

plus they wouldnt even know theyre dead because they never look up from their phones
User avatar #2829 to #2828 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
"lol just got blown up haha "
#2830 to #2829 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
easiest way to fight british troops

scream "omg commandos snuck in and stole the tea" and watch the retreat to make sure
#2831 to #2830 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
implying we hadnt already drunk it all

Our real weakness is saying "have you heard america is backing out"

im going bed now. Too tired to be dealing with your goon ass
#2832 to #2831 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
sleep tight you lazy goit
#2807 - rageblade (03/17/2015) [-]
hey Nigel
hows me favorite cockney
User avatar #2808 to #2807 - turtletroll (03/17/2015) [-]
hows me favorite west german
#2809 to #2808 - rageblade (03/18/2015) [-]
.......well played you bastard
#2810 to #2809 - turtletroll (03/18/2015) [-]
Your move mr kraut
#2813 to #2810 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
did it hurt losing the british empire...once you used to be able to just make indians give you tea now you actually have to pay for it

wrekt
User avatar #2814 to #2813 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
At least i'm allowed to be white in my own country you anti semite
#2815 to #2814 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
im sorry,,,.....how many arabs are in the UK

at least we dont have neighborhoods where theres so many of them they can go whole days without ever speaking the national language

england = turkey 2.0
User avatar #2816 to #2815 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
I live in kebab territory

I might aswell migrate to iraq at this point

#2817 to #2816 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
englandistan
User avatar #2818 to #2817 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
Take them over gypsies anyday
#2819 to #2818 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
well we tried removing gypsies but then you allies invaded us to save them
User avatar #2820 to #2819 - turtletroll (03/19/2015) [-]
Biggest mistake ever

Britain almost allied with germoney aswell too bad you hopped on the invade train too early
#2822 to #2820 - rageblade (03/19/2015) [-]
kinda ****** up given General hindenburg said in ww1 "never again trust the italians"

then hitler gets to power...italy acts like a dick while england begs to join germany.,.hitler takes italy

fukken jew sperg
#2811 to #2810 - anonymous (03/18/2015) [-]
here
i found your family photo

you limey bastard
#2812 to #2811 - turtletroll (03/18/2015) [-]
you are clearly very ignorant   
   
We british are very understanding of different cultures as shown here
you are clearly very ignorant

We british are very understanding of different cultures as shown here
User avatar #2761 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
You are going to love what me and my friend did across Europe.
User avatar #2789 to #2761 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
I'd invest it all in VR sex games.

It's the porn of the future
User avatar #2790 to #2789 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Haha. But the smart thing to do would be keep your job, invest the money in an S & P index fund, and supplement your income with the juicy interest.

Every time someone wins the lottery and quits their job, you know they are going to be broke soon.
User avatar #2794 to #2793 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Exactly. If I ever won the Mega Millions not like I would ever buy a ticket I would put all $ 200+ million in an index fund and just live off the interest. It would be around 5 million a year conservatively.
User avatar #2795 to #2794 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Well he was a chav so what do you expect

But if I got $200 million I would keep 5 mill for myself and put the rest in for the interest
User avatar #2796 to #2795 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
I pay for most things in cash so I recognize the money I am losing. It physically hurts me. With credit cards, many people don't recognize the money they are spending. They just see it as a swipe. That is why many live above their means.
User avatar #2799 to #2796 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
That's true

I end up spending a lot on cds or whatever and before I know it i've got nothing left in my account. But if I was to be buying all of that in shops I wouldn't buy half of it
User avatar #2800 to #2799 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Only thing I am not cheep about is food. During my internship I went out to lunch every single day.
#2804 to #2800 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
trust an AMERICAN to respect FOOD
User avatar #2806 to #2804 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Best food in the world baby.
User avatar #2802 to #2800 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
I'm the complete opposite

I could live on total ****** food if eating unhealthy food made me feel ******
User avatar #2801 to #2800 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
cheap*
User avatar #2762 to #2761 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Experienced glorious socialist states?
User avatar #2763 to #2762 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Yes, Hungary and the Czech Republic are bastions of greatness. Austria is pretty good though.

We pretended we were from Liverpool. You have heard my British accent before right? Sounds nothing like a scouser. We met a bunch of British people on the trip and drank with them on pub crawls. Most of them were from Manchester. So we talked all about the reds. They were dying in laughter.

vocaroo.com/i/s0LAazJRTric

This is what it sounded like.
User avatar #2764 to #2763 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
That's as bad as my scouse impression

this is how its meant to be Scouse Monsters Inc. (OFFICIAL VIDEO) (By Josh Owens)
User avatar #2766 to #2764 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
I was also assaulted by 3 different hookers lol. 2 in Prague and 1 in Budapest. I have a way with them.
User avatar #2769 to #2766 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
I get assaulted by short fat drunk bitches who cant dance in clubs and you get assaulted by hookers

How come you get so lucky with who you get attacked by
User avatar #2770 to #2769 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
I have a mustache and stubble.

I hate beer, yet I ended up drinking over 3 liters per day. Oh, Europe. Beer definitely tastes better.
User avatar #2771 to #2770 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
I can only drink whiskey, cider or vodka mixed with something. Everything else tastes like ****
User avatar #2772 to #2771 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
I normally only drink Rum. Ever had a Mojito? AKA the best drink ever made?
User avatar #2773 to #2772 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
I actually haven't I think

Also Desperados is actually nice. Normally hate beer
User avatar #2774 to #2773 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
>Implying I got anything other than the cheap beer that cost less than 2 dollars for 1.5 liters.

#2776 to #2774 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
> rich kid
> cheap beer

....you ****** scrooge.....
User avatar #2777 to #2776 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Exactly how do you think rich people become rich?
#2778 to #2777 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
only some get rich by being scroogey

others like steve jobs get rich by stealing **** and cashing in
User avatar #2779 to #2778 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Poor people win $400 million in the lottery. End up back in the poor house 2 years later.

Rich people make poor people buy stuff for them.
#2780 to #2779 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
well thats because poor dickheads have been taught by media to live beyond their means while rich can **** money with no worry for the future

User avatar #2781 to #2780 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Rich people don't do that. That is why they are rich. Sure Bill Gates can, but he deserves it. Most fortunes are lost after one generation, because the kids don't see the value of money like their parents who became rich did.

People always call Jews cheap. That is part of the reason they are rich.
#2784 to #2781 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
dude.you do know bill gates has set up millions in trust funds for grandchildren he doesnt even have yet

and most likely he'll groom his kids up to carry on in mocrosoft when hes dead and in turn theyll groom the grandkids

or the rothschilds...or rockerfellers...bushes...and more....they groom each generation up to carry the torch
User avatar #2785 to #2784 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
You do realize Bill Gates is donating 95% of his fortune to charity and is telling his kids he wants them to make their own fortune right?
#2803 to #2785 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
how does charity donations work in usa

and what charities are your parents donating to
User avatar #2805 to #2803 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Food for the rich. And it never amounts to the same amount. You do get a lot back though. Donate old clothes, and **** that would normally go into the trash.
#2797 to #2785 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
dude do you know how it works

ricj guy donates a ******** to charities..gets a receipt from each charity....then at the end of the tax year...sends in the forms with the receipts and claims it all back under the charitable donations rebate

so he can get the good PR for having donated to charity while never getting any poorer
User avatar #2798 to #2797 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Not how it works brah. Take it from someone whose parents donate to charity for tax breaks.
#2791 to #2785 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
right.....like i dont hear tax rebates for charitable donations
User avatar #2792 to #2791 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
There isn't enough tax rebates to make up for donating 40 billion dollars.
#2782 to #2781 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
We could do a social experiment   
   
Give me all of your family's money and we'll see how long it lasts
We could do a social experiment

Give me all of your family's money and we'll see how long it lasts
#2787 to #2782 - anonymous (03/16/2015) [-]
> turtletroll
> money

first thing i see is half the worlds drug supply being sucked into a black hole called turtles house
User avatar #2783 to #2782 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
I give it 2 months. If you were given 5 million, what would you do with it?
User avatar #2786 to #2783 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Try to make it into a source of income

just seems like the smart thing to do
User avatar #2788 to #2786 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
Ahh, classic Athlete style. Make a bunch of poor investments in Bars and Restaurants eh?
#2775 to #2774 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
tfw no job to pay for the bad drinking habits I wish I could have so its just cheap cider and whatever is on special for student nights
tfw no job to pay for the bad drinking habits I wish I could have so its just cheap cider and whatever is on special for student nights
User avatar #2765 to #2764 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
It was supposed to be bad. That is what made it funny.

My friend committed to Liverpool. But we claimed we went to Oxford. So we claimed we picked up the Oxford accent.
User avatar #2767 to #2765 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
I went to a festival and I used to be able to do a great Schwarzenegger impression so I did that for the 5 days and said I was from austria
User avatar #2768 to #2767 - damping (03/16/2015) [-]
I asked the Brits to do an American accent. Only one person did a good one. Super Cali accent.
#2738 - anonymous (03/14/2015) [-]
wake up nigel
dont you spend most of the day on FJ....why arent you on now
User avatar #2744 to #2738 - turtletroll (03/15/2015) [-]
The mighty konradkurze now a anon

kek
#2745 to #2744 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
only using anon at home
i log in when out at a cyber cafe

so how are you mr chav
#2746 to #2745 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
how am i
how am i
#2747 to #2746 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
youre always broke
youre british
#2748 to #2747 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Good thing I only live on cheap cider and chips
#2749 to #2748 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
fukken cockney
#2750 to #2749 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Take that back right now
#2752 to #2751 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
being a northern socialist republican and being called a cockney
being a northern socialist republican and being called a cockney
#2753 to #2752 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
> socialist republican
> russia was united soviet socialist republic [ussr]
> communism was created by karl marx observing british hippies
> aka british invented communism

> turtletroll confirmed COMMUNIST
User avatar #2754 to #2753 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
"turtle stoner lel"

Hippies are stoners
#2755 to #2754 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
BEHOLD THE COMMUNIST TURTLE
User avatar #2756 to #2755 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Must collect more crumpets for the motherland
#2757 to #2756 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
red alert 1 when USSR takes england
skip to 34:00

C&C Red Alert (Soviet story)
User avatar #2758 to #2757 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
Those russian girls I talk to are actually KGB agents.

All comes together
#2759 to #2758 - rageblade (03/16/2015) [-]
they wanted to link up with the communist turtle and bring the UK into the USSR
User avatar #2760 to #2759 - turtletroll (03/16/2015) [-]
United Komrades
#2736 - anonymous (03/14/2015) [-]
seriously chav
change your profile pic, im tired of seeing that nignog
#2739 to #2736 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
Mess with my waifu and ill take your laifu
#2740 to #2739 - anonymous (03/14/2015) [-]
pick a human to be your avatar not a monkey
#2741 to #2740 - turtletroll (03/14/2015) [-]
they released a shoegaze rock song called On GP    
   
You might like it but i know the vocal style isnt really your thing. The instrumental is insane and the lyrics are pretty personal talking about the lead singer struggling with depression and talking about getting past that for his family   
   
And the music video is incredible      
   
Only mentioning this because I know you hate the hiphop side so just wondering what you think of this.   
   
last night three thirty in the morning death on my front porch   
can feel him itching to take me with him hail death 			****		 you waiting for   
like a question no one mention he turns around hands me his weapon   
he slurs use at your discretion its been a pleasure stefan
they released a shoegaze rock song called On GP

You might like it but i know the vocal style isnt really your thing. The instrumental is insane and the lyrics are pretty personal talking about the lead singer struggling with depression and talking about getting past that for his family

And the music video is incredible Death Grips - On GP

Only mentioning this because I know you hate the hiphop side so just wondering what you think of this.

last night three thirty in the morning death on my front porch
can feel him itching to take me with him hail death **** you waiting for
like a question no one mention he turns around hands me his weapon
he slurs use at your discretion its been a pleasure stefan
#2742 to #2741 - anonymous (03/14/2015) [-]
listened to 20 seconds
ears bled
**** song
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