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#82 - Sure. How does dual wielding bastard swords work? Aren't they …  [+] (8 new replies) 11/12/2014 on Crossover Campaigns +1
User avatar #91 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
7) They kill the first boss without much of a problem. Then they antagonize a blacksmith that tells them to get the fuck out of her workshop. When they forcefully try to kick them out, the party ends up killing all her assistants and almost murders her. Then they proceed to not even fight the final boss of the dungeon before escaping, which was disappointing.
They'll run into him later, since he got demoted for letting something run through his research outpost and kill almost everyone.
After that they went to this town and I told them to guard these two walls from Shamblers. Shamblers look like Illithids but are stupid and not psionic. I thought it wouldn't be much of a challenge. Instead, two NPCs from the town that were on those walls ended up dying horribly because the party couldn't protect them, along with another NPC who was fated to die. So that threw off the entire town and put them in serious jeopardy. It'll be fun to see what they do next.
User avatar #93 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
You mentioned playing Dark Heresy. I'm really into WH40K lore and it looks interesting. Do you have any stories about that?
User avatar #94 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
Dark Heresy... I only played one game and it ended after a few sessions because the rules were that bad. It took us two hours to kill five guys just because it's a d100 system and you have to roll underneath your scores. So that's a 30~% chance to hit every time you roll.
As for what happened, I ended up favouriting my sheet because it was a random-rolled family background. I'll quote it for you. "Your mother's name is Midkiff. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your father's name is Jericus. He walks the path of the Guardsman. Your sister's name is Millicent. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your brother's name is Ramirez. He walks the path of the Guardsman."
Amazing. Unlike the rest of her family, Zeke decided she was going to join a freaky-ass Death Cult and become an assassin, which gained her 8 Insanity points. That's two away from gaining a minor mental condition that persists throughout the rest of the game.
Everyone woke up in a pit, our NPC named Chains got mauled to death, and we saw our boss (an inquisitor) had been taken apart by an altered medicae machine. Everyone other than Zeke failed their save and gained insanity points. Zeke also had to carve a symbol into her skin for every kill she got since her Superstition was Living Record. I also remember that someone tried to play a cop, but really poorly.
User avatar #95 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
So it's better to just use gurps with WH40K story?
User avatar #96 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
If you're going to play a 40k story, yes, I would suggest against the d100 system. The GURPS system isn't the best, but it's balanced enough for use.
User avatar #97 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Alright thanks.
User avatar #89 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
5) Count Opheron the Preserver. His mother is the cleric I mentioned before that drugged the paladin's drink. His father is the same paladin she drugged. So his parents absolutely hate each other and it's fabulous. He took his father's greathammer and decided he was going to make the world a better place by pasting one enemy at a time. "The Preserver," references the fact that he turns his enemies into "strawberry" preserves with the hammer. It's what his father used to call himself. I haven't actually gotten to play him yet but I know it's going to be crazy. He's in a party with a quarter-orc paladin who is a total wuss, and a ranger with a superiority complex.

6) "Sal", or Salthruuviastinx. Poor Sal. You see, Sal is a dragon. Or rather, Sal was a dragon. Sal was a dragon that liked to disguise herself as a mortal to go do paladin stuff among the mortals. Due to her paladin oaths, she isn't allowed to own any land, so she can't have a lair or really any treasure, so she wanders around everywhere doing good for the people. She decided to take the form of a teifling to try and give them a better reputation by overthrowing a tyrant while disguised. Some magic ended up sealing her in that form, so now she has to help stop a war between the gods AND find a way to get back her true form. Until she does, she's not only locked into a teifling's body, but restricted to its lifespan as well.

7) So my campaign... where to even start? All the characters woke up in the middle of a dungeon, all naked. Completely, buck-ass naked. Now I planned that and it made sense in context. However, only one person was smart enough to make himself a loincloth out of the items in the room, so the rest went out naked. Also they were supposed to have another player, but he didn't show up so I let someone who was going to join after the dungeon control an NPC. That NPC was a catfolk warrior named Ryzor, and his player made him so stereotypically black that it almost hurt.
(cont)
User avatar #86 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
She was seven feet tall. And yes, they are ridiculously long. Speaking of her height, once she crouched down behind a four-foot goblin so she could sneak up on the one facing him. It worked.

Now, as for the tale of Opheron, Sal, and the misadventures of my players...
#110 - Xander Corvus is my pick. He seems like a bro. 11/12/2014 on My top 10 pornstars 0
#77 - I love reading rpg stories.  [+] (11 new replies) 11/12/2014 on Crossover Campaigns 0
User avatar #80 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
3) After trying to get back into town, she was caught by the captain of the guard, a guy named Rydock. Now, because the capitol city of the humans had been burned to cinders by a giant daemon named Altruis, Rydock was actually next in line to be king. He was very disappointed in her, since they'd actually gone on a mini-adventure together. He ordered her executed, and banished her to the sewers for execution by combat. She and her friends managed to wipe out the entire thieves' guild at the cost of their fighter named Brawl. Shortly after, their party fell apart because Thalra hated the sorcerer (she was racist against elves) and she blamed herself for Brawl's death.

4) I played a giant warforged named SCAR (Self-Commanded Aggression Redirector) who was created by an arch-wizard. He loved books, and was bonded to an elf in the party since he thought his master was dead. However, recently they got into a fight that lead to him leaving the party. The monk and the paladin wanted to destroy this book because it belonged to a lich. The book said it didn't want to be made into a book, but they wanted to burn it anyway. SCAR kneeled on top of it and wouldn't let them have it. He almost knee-capped the paladin, actually. After that, he felt the party had insulted part of his reason for existing and he fucked off out of there, which emotionally destroyed the monk. Fun times.

I have a story about two characters I'm playing now, and the campaign I've made. Want to hear any of those?
User avatar #82 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Sure. How does dual wielding bastard swords work? Aren't they kinda long?
User avatar #91 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
7) They kill the first boss without much of a problem. Then they antagonize a blacksmith that tells them to get the fuck out of her workshop. When they forcefully try to kick them out, the party ends up killing all her assistants and almost murders her. Then they proceed to not even fight the final boss of the dungeon before escaping, which was disappointing.
They'll run into him later, since he got demoted for letting something run through his research outpost and kill almost everyone.
After that they went to this town and I told them to guard these two walls from Shamblers. Shamblers look like Illithids but are stupid and not psionic. I thought it wouldn't be much of a challenge. Instead, two NPCs from the town that were on those walls ended up dying horribly because the party couldn't protect them, along with another NPC who was fated to die. So that threw off the entire town and put them in serious jeopardy. It'll be fun to see what they do next.
User avatar #93 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
You mentioned playing Dark Heresy. I'm really into WH40K lore and it looks interesting. Do you have any stories about that?
User avatar #94 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
Dark Heresy... I only played one game and it ended after a few sessions because the rules were that bad. It took us two hours to kill five guys just because it's a d100 system and you have to roll underneath your scores. So that's a 30~% chance to hit every time you roll.
As for what happened, I ended up favouriting my sheet because it was a random-rolled family background. I'll quote it for you. "Your mother's name is Midkiff. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your father's name is Jericus. He walks the path of the Guardsman. Your sister's name is Millicent. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your brother's name is Ramirez. He walks the path of the Guardsman."
Amazing. Unlike the rest of her family, Zeke decided she was going to join a freaky-ass Death Cult and become an assassin, which gained her 8 Insanity points. That's two away from gaining a minor mental condition that persists throughout the rest of the game.
Everyone woke up in a pit, our NPC named Chains got mauled to death, and we saw our boss (an inquisitor) had been taken apart by an altered medicae machine. Everyone other than Zeke failed their save and gained insanity points. Zeke also had to carve a symbol into her skin for every kill she got since her Superstition was Living Record. I also remember that someone tried to play a cop, but really poorly.
User avatar #95 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
So it's better to just use gurps with WH40K story?
User avatar #96 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
If you're going to play a 40k story, yes, I would suggest against the d100 system. The GURPS system isn't the best, but it's balanced enough for use.
User avatar #97 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Alright thanks.
User avatar #89 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
5) Count Opheron the Preserver. His mother is the cleric I mentioned before that drugged the paladin's drink. His father is the same paladin she drugged. So his parents absolutely hate each other and it's fabulous. He took his father's greathammer and decided he was going to make the world a better place by pasting one enemy at a time. "The Preserver," references the fact that he turns his enemies into "strawberry" preserves with the hammer. It's what his father used to call himself. I haven't actually gotten to play him yet but I know it's going to be crazy. He's in a party with a quarter-orc paladin who is a total wuss, and a ranger with a superiority complex.

6) "Sal", or Salthruuviastinx. Poor Sal. You see, Sal is a dragon. Or rather, Sal was a dragon. Sal was a dragon that liked to disguise herself as a mortal to go do paladin stuff among the mortals. Due to her paladin oaths, she isn't allowed to own any land, so she can't have a lair or really any treasure, so she wanders around everywhere doing good for the people. She decided to take the form of a teifling to try and give them a better reputation by overthrowing a tyrant while disguised. Some magic ended up sealing her in that form, so now she has to help stop a war between the gods AND find a way to get back her true form. Until she does, she's not only locked into a teifling's body, but restricted to its lifespan as well.

7) So my campaign... where to even start? All the characters woke up in the middle of a dungeon, all naked. Completely, buck-ass naked. Now I planned that and it made sense in context. However, only one person was smart enough to make himself a loincloth out of the items in the room, so the rest went out naked. Also they were supposed to have another player, but he didn't show up so I let someone who was going to join after the dungeon control an NPC. That NPC was a catfolk warrior named Ryzor, and his player made him so stereotypically black that it almost hurt.
(cont)
User avatar #86 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
She was seven feet tall. And yes, they are ridiculously long. Speaking of her height, once she crouched down behind a four-foot goblin so she could sneak up on the one facing him. It worked.

Now, as for the tale of Opheron, Sal, and the misadventures of my players...
User avatar #78 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
1) Once I was mad at this paladin for some reason. I forget the specifics of it, but I wanted to get back at him. My cleric bought a Potion of Unnatural Lust from an alchemist and spiked his morning drink with it. The paladin proceeded to try and hook up with the bartender, who was a fat middle-aged man who hid in the back room of his inn until the potion wore off. After that the paladin absolutely hated me. OOC it was totally worth it to see the look on his face and hear the realization in his voice. I'd told him I was going to spike his drink, but not with what.

2) Another time I was playing an Obitu, which are skeletons that have a few biological processes, yadda yadda. This Obitu, called Dusty Bones, made it her mission to destroy every and all undead and necromancers in existence, including all the undead of her own race. After getting flung across the solar system to an ice planet that everyone assumed was the plane of frost, she met a drake who made her face a shadowy version of herself to test if she was really dedicated to her cause of murdering all undead, including herself. After the dragon was satisfied, she gave the skeltal two weapons specifically for murdering the undead. Later she touched a magical dome of bullshit and had to make a fortitude save to avoid dying from pain. She succeeded and her body returned to life, turning her into a male orc. The DM ended the campaign after that though.

3) Thalra, also known as The Rogue Who Stole Everything. Thalra was a seven-foot tall Dragonborn rogue. Yes. A rogue. Her signature fighting style was dual wielding bastard swords, because they have a racial feat that lets them use them. Bastard swords counted as one-handed exotic weapons, so the DM let me one-hand them. Now for the fun part; she was really sneaky. At night she broke into a magic shop and stole literally every item out of the shop. Every single one. Then she sneaked out of town to bury the stash.

(cont...)
#75 - You are welcome. I only know about it because I watch Rollplay…  [+] (13 new replies) 11/12/2014 on Crossover Campaigns +1
User avatar #76 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
It depends on the DM you have and the players you have. You can have weirdos like the infamous "Semen dungeon" guy, or the other person in this thread who got raped by a dragon and died giving birth to its spawn. You can have other annoying That Guy players. Or you can get a good DM who creates really rich worlds of their own with a special plotline, and players who are invested in their characters. If you want I can tell you a story from each of the characters I've played or campaigns I've been in/created.
User avatar #77 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
I love reading rpg stories.
User avatar #80 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
3) After trying to get back into town, she was caught by the captain of the guard, a guy named Rydock. Now, because the capitol city of the humans had been burned to cinders by a giant daemon named Altruis, Rydock was actually next in line to be king. He was very disappointed in her, since they'd actually gone on a mini-adventure together. He ordered her executed, and banished her to the sewers for execution by combat. She and her friends managed to wipe out the entire thieves' guild at the cost of their fighter named Brawl. Shortly after, their party fell apart because Thalra hated the sorcerer (she was racist against elves) and she blamed herself for Brawl's death.

4) I played a giant warforged named SCAR (Self-Commanded Aggression Redirector) who was created by an arch-wizard. He loved books, and was bonded to an elf in the party since he thought his master was dead. However, recently they got into a fight that lead to him leaving the party. The monk and the paladin wanted to destroy this book because it belonged to a lich. The book said it didn't want to be made into a book, but they wanted to burn it anyway. SCAR kneeled on top of it and wouldn't let them have it. He almost knee-capped the paladin, actually. After that, he felt the party had insulted part of his reason for existing and he fucked off out of there, which emotionally destroyed the monk. Fun times.

I have a story about two characters I'm playing now, and the campaign I've made. Want to hear any of those?
User avatar #82 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Sure. How does dual wielding bastard swords work? Aren't they kinda long?
User avatar #91 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
7) They kill the first boss without much of a problem. Then they antagonize a blacksmith that tells them to get the fuck out of her workshop. When they forcefully try to kick them out, the party ends up killing all her assistants and almost murders her. Then they proceed to not even fight the final boss of the dungeon before escaping, which was disappointing.
They'll run into him later, since he got demoted for letting something run through his research outpost and kill almost everyone.
After that they went to this town and I told them to guard these two walls from Shamblers. Shamblers look like Illithids but are stupid and not psionic. I thought it wouldn't be much of a challenge. Instead, two NPCs from the town that were on those walls ended up dying horribly because the party couldn't protect them, along with another NPC who was fated to die. So that threw off the entire town and put them in serious jeopardy. It'll be fun to see what they do next.
User avatar #93 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
You mentioned playing Dark Heresy. I'm really into WH40K lore and it looks interesting. Do you have any stories about that?
User avatar #94 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
Dark Heresy... I only played one game and it ended after a few sessions because the rules were that bad. It took us two hours to kill five guys just because it's a d100 system and you have to roll underneath your scores. So that's a 30~% chance to hit every time you roll.
As for what happened, I ended up favouriting my sheet because it was a random-rolled family background. I'll quote it for you. "Your mother's name is Midkiff. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your father's name is Jericus. He walks the path of the Guardsman. Your sister's name is Millicent. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your brother's name is Ramirez. He walks the path of the Guardsman."
Amazing. Unlike the rest of her family, Zeke decided she was going to join a freaky-ass Death Cult and become an assassin, which gained her 8 Insanity points. That's two away from gaining a minor mental condition that persists throughout the rest of the game.
Everyone woke up in a pit, our NPC named Chains got mauled to death, and we saw our boss (an inquisitor) had been taken apart by an altered medicae machine. Everyone other than Zeke failed their save and gained insanity points. Zeke also had to carve a symbol into her skin for every kill she got since her Superstition was Living Record. I also remember that someone tried to play a cop, but really poorly.
User avatar #95 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
So it's better to just use gurps with WH40K story?
User avatar #96 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
If you're going to play a 40k story, yes, I would suggest against the d100 system. The GURPS system isn't the best, but it's balanced enough for use.
User avatar #97 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Alright thanks.
User avatar #89 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
5) Count Opheron the Preserver. His mother is the cleric I mentioned before that drugged the paladin's drink. His father is the same paladin she drugged. So his parents absolutely hate each other and it's fabulous. He took his father's greathammer and decided he was going to make the world a better place by pasting one enemy at a time. "The Preserver," references the fact that he turns his enemies into "strawberry" preserves with the hammer. It's what his father used to call himself. I haven't actually gotten to play him yet but I know it's going to be crazy. He's in a party with a quarter-orc paladin who is a total wuss, and a ranger with a superiority complex.

6) "Sal", or Salthruuviastinx. Poor Sal. You see, Sal is a dragon. Or rather, Sal was a dragon. Sal was a dragon that liked to disguise herself as a mortal to go do paladin stuff among the mortals. Due to her paladin oaths, she isn't allowed to own any land, so she can't have a lair or really any treasure, so she wanders around everywhere doing good for the people. She decided to take the form of a teifling to try and give them a better reputation by overthrowing a tyrant while disguised. Some magic ended up sealing her in that form, so now she has to help stop a war between the gods AND find a way to get back her true form. Until she does, she's not only locked into a teifling's body, but restricted to its lifespan as well.

7) So my campaign... where to even start? All the characters woke up in the middle of a dungeon, all naked. Completely, buck-ass naked. Now I planned that and it made sense in context. However, only one person was smart enough to make himself a loincloth out of the items in the room, so the rest went out naked. Also they were supposed to have another player, but he didn't show up so I let someone who was going to join after the dungeon control an NPC. That NPC was a catfolk warrior named Ryzor, and his player made him so stereotypically black that it almost hurt.
(cont)
User avatar #86 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
She was seven feet tall. And yes, they are ridiculously long. Speaking of her height, once she crouched down behind a four-foot goblin so she could sneak up on the one facing him. It worked.

Now, as for the tale of Opheron, Sal, and the misadventures of my players...
User avatar #78 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
1) Once I was mad at this paladin for some reason. I forget the specifics of it, but I wanted to get back at him. My cleric bought a Potion of Unnatural Lust from an alchemist and spiked his morning drink with it. The paladin proceeded to try and hook up with the bartender, who was a fat middle-aged man who hid in the back room of his inn until the potion wore off. After that the paladin absolutely hated me. OOC it was totally worth it to see the look on his face and hear the realization in his voice. I'd told him I was going to spike his drink, but not with what.

2) Another time I was playing an Obitu, which are skeletons that have a few biological processes, yadda yadda. This Obitu, called Dusty Bones, made it her mission to destroy every and all undead and necromancers in existence, including all the undead of her own race. After getting flung across the solar system to an ice planet that everyone assumed was the plane of frost, she met a drake who made her face a shadowy version of herself to test if she was really dedicated to her cause of murdering all undead, including herself. After the dragon was satisfied, she gave the skeltal two weapons specifically for murdering the undead. Later she touched a magical dome of bullshit and had to make a fortitude save to avoid dying from pain. She succeeded and her body returned to life, turning her into a male orc. The DM ended the campaign after that though.

3) Thalra, also known as The Rogue Who Stole Everything. Thalra was a seven-foot tall Dragonborn rogue. Yes. A rogue. Her signature fighting style was dual wielding bastard swords, because they have a racial feat that lets them use them. Bastard swords counted as one-handed exotic weapons, so the DM let me one-hand them. Now for the fun part; she was really sneaky. At night she broke into a magic shop and stole literally every item out of the shop. Every single one. Then she sneaked out of town to bury the stash.

(cont...)
#62 - Stars without Numbers?  [+] (15 new replies) 11/12/2014 on Crossover Campaigns +1
User avatar #67 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
Yes, thank you. I played a giant bug-monster in one of those. 10/10 would do again.
User avatar #75 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
You are welcome. I only know about it because I watch Rollplay Swan Song in youtube. Never played a tabletop rpg before but it seems like fun.
User avatar #76 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
It depends on the DM you have and the players you have. You can have weirdos like the infamous "Semen dungeon" guy, or the other person in this thread who got raped by a dragon and died giving birth to its spawn. You can have other annoying That Guy players. Or you can get a good DM who creates really rich worlds of their own with a special plotline, and players who are invested in their characters. If you want I can tell you a story from each of the characters I've played or campaigns I've been in/created.
User avatar #77 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
I love reading rpg stories.
User avatar #80 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
3) After trying to get back into town, she was caught by the captain of the guard, a guy named Rydock. Now, because the capitol city of the humans had been burned to cinders by a giant daemon named Altruis, Rydock was actually next in line to be king. He was very disappointed in her, since they'd actually gone on a mini-adventure together. He ordered her executed, and banished her to the sewers for execution by combat. She and her friends managed to wipe out the entire thieves' guild at the cost of their fighter named Brawl. Shortly after, their party fell apart because Thalra hated the sorcerer (she was racist against elves) and she blamed herself for Brawl's death.

4) I played a giant warforged named SCAR (Self-Commanded Aggression Redirector) who was created by an arch-wizard. He loved books, and was bonded to an elf in the party since he thought his master was dead. However, recently they got into a fight that lead to him leaving the party. The monk and the paladin wanted to destroy this book because it belonged to a lich. The book said it didn't want to be made into a book, but they wanted to burn it anyway. SCAR kneeled on top of it and wouldn't let them have it. He almost knee-capped the paladin, actually. After that, he felt the party had insulted part of his reason for existing and he fucked off out of there, which emotionally destroyed the monk. Fun times.

I have a story about two characters I'm playing now, and the campaign I've made. Want to hear any of those?
User avatar #82 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Sure. How does dual wielding bastard swords work? Aren't they kinda long?
User avatar #91 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
7) They kill the first boss without much of a problem. Then they antagonize a blacksmith that tells them to get the fuck out of her workshop. When they forcefully try to kick them out, the party ends up killing all her assistants and almost murders her. Then they proceed to not even fight the final boss of the dungeon before escaping, which was disappointing.
They'll run into him later, since he got demoted for letting something run through his research outpost and kill almost everyone.
After that they went to this town and I told them to guard these two walls from Shamblers. Shamblers look like Illithids but are stupid and not psionic. I thought it wouldn't be much of a challenge. Instead, two NPCs from the town that were on those walls ended up dying horribly because the party couldn't protect them, along with another NPC who was fated to die. So that threw off the entire town and put them in serious jeopardy. It'll be fun to see what they do next.
User avatar #93 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
You mentioned playing Dark Heresy. I'm really into WH40K lore and it looks interesting. Do you have any stories about that?
User avatar #94 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
Dark Heresy... I only played one game and it ended after a few sessions because the rules were that bad. It took us two hours to kill five guys just because it's a d100 system and you have to roll underneath your scores. So that's a 30~% chance to hit every time you roll.
As for what happened, I ended up favouriting my sheet because it was a random-rolled family background. I'll quote it for you. "Your mother's name is Midkiff. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your father's name is Jericus. He walks the path of the Guardsman. Your sister's name is Millicent. She walks the path of the Guardsman. Your brother's name is Ramirez. He walks the path of the Guardsman."
Amazing. Unlike the rest of her family, Zeke decided she was going to join a freaky-ass Death Cult and become an assassin, which gained her 8 Insanity points. That's two away from gaining a minor mental condition that persists throughout the rest of the game.
Everyone woke up in a pit, our NPC named Chains got mauled to death, and we saw our boss (an inquisitor) had been taken apart by an altered medicae machine. Everyone other than Zeke failed their save and gained insanity points. Zeke also had to carve a symbol into her skin for every kill she got since her Superstition was Living Record. I also remember that someone tried to play a cop, but really poorly.
User avatar #95 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
So it's better to just use gurps with WH40K story?
User avatar #96 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
If you're going to play a 40k story, yes, I would suggest against the d100 system. The GURPS system isn't the best, but it's balanced enough for use.
User avatar #97 - trollzoll (11/12/2014) [-]
Alright thanks.
User avatar #89 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
5) Count Opheron the Preserver. His mother is the cleric I mentioned before that drugged the paladin's drink. His father is the same paladin she drugged. So his parents absolutely hate each other and it's fabulous. He took his father's greathammer and decided he was going to make the world a better place by pasting one enemy at a time. "The Preserver," references the fact that he turns his enemies into "strawberry" preserves with the hammer. It's what his father used to call himself. I haven't actually gotten to play him yet but I know it's going to be crazy. He's in a party with a quarter-orc paladin who is a total wuss, and a ranger with a superiority complex.

6) "Sal", or Salthruuviastinx. Poor Sal. You see, Sal is a dragon. Or rather, Sal was a dragon. Sal was a dragon that liked to disguise herself as a mortal to go do paladin stuff among the mortals. Due to her paladin oaths, she isn't allowed to own any land, so she can't have a lair or really any treasure, so she wanders around everywhere doing good for the people. She decided to take the form of a teifling to try and give them a better reputation by overthrowing a tyrant while disguised. Some magic ended up sealing her in that form, so now she has to help stop a war between the gods AND find a way to get back her true form. Until she does, she's not only locked into a teifling's body, but restricted to its lifespan as well.

7) So my campaign... where to even start? All the characters woke up in the middle of a dungeon, all naked. Completely, buck-ass naked. Now I planned that and it made sense in context. However, only one person was smart enough to make himself a loincloth out of the items in the room, so the rest went out naked. Also they were supposed to have another player, but he didn't show up so I let someone who was going to join after the dungeon control an NPC. That NPC was a catfolk warrior named Ryzor, and his player made him so stereotypically black that it almost hurt.
(cont)
User avatar #86 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
She was seven feet tall. And yes, they are ridiculously long. Speaking of her height, once she crouched down behind a four-foot goblin so she could sneak up on the one facing him. It worked.

Now, as for the tale of Opheron, Sal, and the misadventures of my players...
User avatar #78 - derpwolf (11/12/2014) [-]
1) Once I was mad at this paladin for some reason. I forget the specifics of it, but I wanted to get back at him. My cleric bought a Potion of Unnatural Lust from an alchemist and spiked his morning drink with it. The paladin proceeded to try and hook up with the bartender, who was a fat middle-aged man who hid in the back room of his inn until the potion wore off. After that the paladin absolutely hated me. OOC it was totally worth it to see the look on his face and hear the realization in his voice. I'd told him I was going to spike his drink, but not with what.

2) Another time I was playing an Obitu, which are skeletons that have a few biological processes, yadda yadda. This Obitu, called Dusty Bones, made it her mission to destroy every and all undead and necromancers in existence, including all the undead of her own race. After getting flung across the solar system to an ice planet that everyone assumed was the plane of frost, she met a drake who made her face a shadowy version of herself to test if she was really dedicated to her cause of murdering all undead, including herself. After the dragon was satisfied, she gave the skeltal two weapons specifically for murdering the undead. Later she touched a magical dome of bullshit and had to make a fortitude save to avoid dying from pain. She succeeded and her body returned to life, turning her into a male orc. The DM ended the campaign after that though.

3) Thalra, also known as The Rogue Who Stole Everything. Thalra was a seven-foot tall Dragonborn rogue. Yes. A rogue. Her signature fighting style was dual wielding bastard swords, because they have a racial feat that lets them use them. Bastard swords counted as one-handed exotic weapons, so the DM let me one-hand them. Now for the fun part; she was really sneaky. At night she broke into a magic shop and stole literally every item out of the shop. Every single one. Then she sneaked out of town to bury the stash.

(cont...)
#75 - What the **** ? This article is reeking of femina…  [+] (1 new reply) 11/11/2014 on Kotaku supports people like... 0
#87 - Womens Study Major (11/12/2014) [-]
It was worse.
There are wikipedos fighting tooth and nail to make it less biased against GG, but there's also the resident feminazi libtard circlejerk fighting them at every move.
#222 - Dat streisand effect. 11/11/2014 on Read Desc. +1
#97 - You seem like one of those people who talk to someone 1 year y… 11/11/2014 on Anon buys a game +1
#65 - One of my favorite movies. 11/10/2014 on /k/ in a gunfight +1
#16 - Wow thanks admin. One shotted, there was nothing I could do. 11/06/2014 on gamedefine +1
#76 - Recently got interested in W40K. Thinking of buying Dark Venga… 11/05/2014 on watch out 0
#74 - Look at him with his huge shoulderpads thinking he knows everything. 11/05/2014 on watch out 0
#28 - Only half. Wat r u lightweight? 11/05/2014 on Drunk 2 +1
#119 - What pattern does GoT follow?  [+] (2 new replies) 11/05/2014 on Law and Order 0
User avatar #143 - hanabro (11/05/2014) [-]
>Awesome, well beloved character is introduced.
>TV show cuts said character to make room for more tits and Dany/Tyrion dickriding

I thank the show for introducing me to the books, but it makes me sad how much awesome shit they cut to give memedwarf a few ebuk scenes.

I love you Victarion. Why did they do this to you? I miss you too, Coldhands, Strong Belwas, Arianne, and Quentin.
User avatar #138 - velho (11/05/2014) [-]
Everybody dies?
#77 - Comment deleted 11/05/2014 on Are you ready kids? 0
#141 - Hold your grenades bro. 11/04/2014 on This is war -1
#45 - Better hide that big ass forehead. 11/03/2014 on Dwayne The Rock's Johnson +1
#39 - Hehe harder... 11/03/2014 on Pink and Juicy 0
#63 - Yeah he is the only one I even watch these days. 11/03/2014 on Totally not a scam! +1
#60 - He is just pissed off because he is a fatass and was never goo… 11/03/2014 on Totally not a scam! 0
#59 - I wonder why they haven't kicked him out yet for not being a S…  [+] (2 new replies) 11/03/2014 on Totally not a scam! +1
User avatar #61 - mudkipfucker (11/03/2014) [-]
I would assume he gets the most views of any contributor other than Doug or maybe Louis thats why
plus he's the best one
User avatar #63 - trollzoll (11/03/2014) [-]
Yeah he is the only one I even watch these days.
#18 - Ur a witty little kunt I give you that m9 11/02/2014 on Chivalry Ain't Dead +3
#253 - ***** you gon die. 11/01/2014 on Cod players playing dark souls 0
#147 - Thay are both FeMale. 11/01/2014 on Anita and Sarah 0
#34 - Download dolphin emulator and Smash Bros ROM on your com… 10/31/2014 on Wii U 0
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