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trollmetoday

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Date Signed Up:3/27/2011
Last Login:4/02/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#10242
Highest Content Rank:#6027
Highest Comment Rank:#1245
Content Thumbs: 1830 total,  2250 ,  420
Comment Thumbs: 7047 total,  8224 ,  1177
Content Level Progress: 29% (29/100)
Level 118 Content: Funny Junkie → Level 119 Content: Funny Junkie
Comment Level Progress: 60% (60/100)
Level 269 Comments: Pure Win → Level 270 Comments: Ninja Pirate
Subscribers:5
Content Views:68884
Times Content Favorited:265 times
Total Comments Made:1465
FJ Points:9175

latest user's comments

#148 - took me a while, but I found the gif version! 12/21/2013 on The Simpsons 0
#538 - **trollmetoday rolls 27** 12/11/2013 on if you are bored today 0
#49 - Finger prints sounds like finger prince. 11/10/2013 on A gem from my childhood. 0
#16 - Maybe you just aren't looking hard enough  [+] (3 new replies) 11/09/2013 on don't judge a book by it's... +3
User avatar #17 - thechosentroll (11/09/2013) [-]
Still harder than finding McNuggets.
User avatar #31 - witislimited (11/09/2013) [-]
Cut up a salad yourself. It's not too much trouble, you can put whatever fucking vegetable, fruit, dressing and condiment you want on your own and however you want it. Example, I like to shred carrot and cucumber (corn if some is on hand) into a bowl, drown it in lemon juice, with a dash of olive oil and rosemary.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tabbouleh
A middle eastern parsley salad that's incredible if done properly.
#18 - anonymous (11/09/2013) [-]
But that isn't really a decent salad anyway.
#60 - Bend over and find out 11/06/2013 on The Truth 0
#30 - Ingenious plan. I might have to try it at some point.  [+] (1 new reply) 11/06/2013 on The Truth +4
User avatar #34 - imofcnotharveydent (11/06/2013) [-]
won't work man, promise from a guy going in a class full of girls, got my gf through some of my friends in class, quite epic indeed
#29 - IT WAS ONE TIME! 11/06/2013 on The Truth +6
#2 - ******** , I've been telling my mom that I'm not gay for…  [+] (13 new replies) 11/06/2013 on The Truth +85
User avatar #54 - empithree (11/06/2013) [-]
even I don't believe you.
User avatar #60 - trollmetoday (11/06/2013) [-]
Bend over and find out
User avatar #52 - uncledick (11/06/2013) [-]
Fuck a guy right in front of her.
User avatar #33 - rasins (11/06/2013) [-]
I guess you can say time flies when youre a faggot.
User avatar #20 - turboderp (11/06/2013) [-]
Have you considered to just roll with it?

Let her think you're gay, act a bit feminine arround her. Her friends will hear about it, and they have doughters. "hey, why don't you go hang out with that nice boy, I hear he's gay"

*omg gay guy he must become my best friend*

then be like "you be turnin' me straight gurl"

and you live happily ever after.
#30 - trollmetoday (11/06/2013) [-]
Ingenious plan. I might have to try it at some point.
User avatar #34 - imofcnotharveydent (11/06/2013) [-]
won't work man, promise from a guy going in a class full of girls, got my gf through some of my friends in class, quite epic indeed
#25 - butterisgood (11/06/2013) [-]
#9 - supbroskiman (11/06/2013) [-]
"Just because I sucked the neighbor's dick doesn't mean I'm gay mom!"
User avatar #29 - trollmetoday (11/06/2013) [-]
IT WAS ONE TIME!
#24 - Flail (11/06/2013) [-]
Hahahaha
#26 - pwnmissilereborn (11/06/2013) [-]
User avatar #3 - willshire (11/06/2013) [-]
maybe she thinks the lady doth protest too much? maybe if you just brought a girl over and just nailed her on the living room couch she would stop.
#11 - Who nose.  [+] (2 new replies) 11/04/2013 on Dose of cute +14
User avatar #12 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
was that a fucking pun... if it was well played
User avatar #27 - datlaugh (11/04/2013) [-]
I thought you were trolling him because of his name...
#9 - The definition of a nose is above the mouth, and containing no…  [+] (4 new replies) 11/04/2013 on Dose of cute +1
User avatar #10 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
so then since my nose is on my face my face is my nose?
User avatar #11 - trollmetoday (11/04/2013) [-]
Who nose.
User avatar #12 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
was that a fucking pun... if it was well played
User avatar #27 - datlaugh (11/04/2013) [-]
I thought you were trolling him because of his name...
#7 - That's a nose too  [+] (6 new replies) 11/04/2013 on Dose of cute 0
User avatar #8 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
isn't the nose of a duck on the beak... I'm pretty sure they are two different things
User avatar #9 - trollmetoday (11/04/2013) [-]
The definition of a nose is above the mouth, and containing nostrils for breathing and smelling. So if I'm not mistaken, the beak is a form of nose.
User avatar #10 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
so then since my nose is on my face my face is my nose?
User avatar #11 - trollmetoday (11/04/2013) [-]
Who nose.
User avatar #12 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
was that a fucking pun... if it was well played
User avatar #27 - datlaugh (11/04/2013) [-]
I thought you were trolling him because of his name...
#5 - A beak is still a nose.  [+] (8 new replies) 11/04/2013 on Dose of cute 0
User avatar #6 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
well.... elephants have trunks
User avatar #7 - trollmetoday (11/04/2013) [-]
That's a nose too
User avatar #8 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
isn't the nose of a duck on the beak... I'm pretty sure they are two different things
User avatar #9 - trollmetoday (11/04/2013) [-]
The definition of a nose is above the mouth, and containing nostrils for breathing and smelling. So if I'm not mistaken, the beak is a form of nose.
User avatar #10 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
so then since my nose is on my face my face is my nose?
User avatar #11 - trollmetoday (11/04/2013) [-]
Who nose.
User avatar #12 - randomwanker (11/04/2013) [-]
was that a fucking pun... if it was well played
User avatar #27 - datlaugh (11/04/2013) [-]
I thought you were trolling him because of his name...
#5 - She dooooooooooooo 11/03/2013 on real man dont give a fak... +68
#4 - Do she got a booty?  [+] (1 new reply) 11/03/2013 on real man dont give a fak... +50
#5 - trollmetoday (11/03/2013) [-]
She dooooooooooooo
#11 - I remember when I was just a wee lad, this used to be my favor… 11/03/2013 on Smurfy Tiger 0
#21 - I have experienced the pain of eating an entire pineapple, eve…  [+] (1 new reply) 11/02/2013 on worth the read +1
#52 - taurusguy (11/03/2013) [-]
I just couldnt taste anything, tongue was as numb as a pornstar's vagina.
#273 - You know, I was thinking about that; still not sure why I didn… 11/02/2013 on Friends from Great Places +1
#261 - Anna ****** up. On a side note I thought…  [+] (2 new replies) 11/02/2013 on Friends from Great Places +8
User avatar #271 - deathleprechaun (11/02/2013) [-]
You missed a golden opportunity to tell us her name is Eva.
User avatar #273 - trollmetoday (11/02/2013) [-]
You know, I was thinking about that; still not sure why I didn't do it.
#6448895 - Please stop rolling me, it makes me think that someone wants t… 11/01/2013 on Autism Board 0
#61 - Am I watching Roseanne? 10/30/2013 on My friend on reddit lost... +1
#1 - Comment deleted 10/29/2013 on Squirrel +1
#58 - I remember the last time I got fight 10/15/2013 on Man of Kaka Carrot Cake 0
#29 - That's usually the type of container that would be used for de… 10/15/2013 on Cannibalism 0
#138 - *tips fedora* 10/15/2013 on So I heard you like bad boys +1
#2 - Kung Lao usually wears a hat with a blade around the brim whic… 10/12/2013 on Mortal Kombat Mistake +18

items

Total unique items point value: 550 / Total items point value: 750
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #11 - zameckis (10/29/2012) [-]
do troll me today
User avatar #12 to #11 - trollmetoday ONLINE (12/31/2012) [-]
No
User avatar #8 - badboywantsu (01/05/2012) [-]
hello fellow pittsburgh resident, i saw your comment.
uh what's up?
User avatar #9 to #8 - trollmetoday ONLINE (02/16/2012) [-]
Taking a month to reply ftw! Nothing much, and you?
User avatar #10 to #9 - badboywantsu (02/16/2012) [-]
work, losing 20 pounds, working out, looking for people to hang out with.

User avatar #6 - ihaventsleptyetfml (12/18/2011) [-]
i rolled your username because a post told me so. well here you go happy fapmas http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZlvgBxtLgI
User avatar #2 - hotvagina (11/24/2011) [-]
Nope, why don't you drive right on over to the good old capital of Canada just to take me out for a coffee?
User avatar #3 to #2 - trollmetoday ONLINE (11/24/2011) [-]
I'll be there in about 10 hours
User avatar #4 to #3 - hotvagina (11/24/2011) [-]
Sounds good, person whose age I don't even know, let alone anything else! Lol, but seriously, where are you from? It snowed here today :)
User avatar #5 to #4 - trollmetoday ONLINE (11/24/2011) [-]
I'm from Pennsylvania, it's pretty cold here. But nothing like when i was in Qubec and Ontario
User avatar #1 - TheSuperHobo (10/18/2011) [-]
You are amazing. Keep it up, bro.
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