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Rank #3449 on Subscribers
swimmingprodigy Avatar Level 339 Comments: Practically Famous
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Date Signed Up:3/17/2010
Last Login:8/20/2014
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#3644
Highest Content Rank:#341
Highest Comment Rank:#131
Content Thumbs: 18091 total,  20996 ,  2905
Comment Thumbs: 39993 total,  49917 ,  9924
Content Level Progress: 2.6% (26/1000)
Level 218 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 219 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 42.1% (421/1000)
Level 339 Comments: Practically Famous → Level 340 Comments: Sold Soul
Content Views:383594
Times Content Favorited:1902 times
Total Comments Made:13742
FJ Points:58459
Favorite Tags: a (3) | Apple (2) | epic (2) | justin (2) | lol (2) | Mario (2) | remi (2)

latest user's comments

#1 - ImOKwiththis.jpg 07/22/2012 on JailBait Time . -1
#10 - Dont do this guys, first time I trited it about a year ago, … 07/21/2012 on It's so crazy, it might... +3
#19 - nonuple yellow line God… 07/21/2012 on You Shall Not Pass 0
#9 - I did not notice the wetness of the road. Never crossed my min… 07/21/2012 on Always Keep a Safe Distance 0
#4 - if the driver of the car out of control was more pro, he'd ste…  [+] (3 new replies) 07/21/2012 on Always Keep a Safe Distance 0
User avatar #8 - thepalmtoptiger (07/21/2012) [-]
Hitting the break while Hydroplaning is possibly the worst thing you can do. You're supposed to turn in the direction the car is headed and take your foot off the gas. Once you see feel that the car is stable again then you can do whatever the hell you want.
User avatar #9 - swimmingprodigy (07/21/2012) [-]
I did not notice the wetness of the road. Never crossed my mind he was hydroplaning. In that case what I said was wrong.
User avatar #6 - sidefxninteen (07/21/2012) [-]
Easyer said then done, that car was hydroplaning, that means there is just about no controll at all, stop watching to many movies.
#181 - no offense but thats a really ******** excuse. I … 07/21/2012 on Average day 0
#111 - how the **** did the writers of the Bible know wh…  [+] (1 new reply) 07/21/2012 on Now I Actually Want To Go... +1
#124 - maysonlee has deleted their comment.
#7404987 - but...but...so many things I havent done. Like her <--- 07/21/2012 on FJ Pony Thread 0
#179 - -_____- Im still a while away from moving out. Living at home …  [+] (2 new replies) 07/21/2012 on Average day 0
User avatar #180 - razorwind (07/21/2012) [-]
I don't have a job because there's too many people in VA. I'm only getting checks from my dad for now, but I hope that if I apply for a couple more jobs, I'll get one.
User avatar #181 - swimmingprodigy (07/21/2012) [-]
no offense but thats a really bullshit excuse. I live in NYV, am 17 years old, and still found myself a job. Usually employers dont like employing minors but i still got one. And this is a real job too, one that is on the books and pays taxes
#267 - same. Avatar was good, ponies I can tolerate. This new "w…  [+] (1 new reply) 07/20/2012 on criticism -1
User avatar #269 - creosote (07/20/2012) [-]
Okay, well, yes, the Whose Line Is It Anyways is getting old, although I absolutely love that show, but for me, all of the recent fads have just been simply tolerable so far (I'm not an Avatar fan). But yeah, this last one is just too much. Enough with the fads already!
#13 - she pushed her mom halfway across the house and then assaulted…  [+] (3 new replies) 07/20/2012 on moves like jagger +58
#28 - Jameshaich (07/20/2012) [-]
"Assaulted her"
"Halfway across the house"
Jesus christ, you'd make a good lawyer.
User avatar #22 - toosexyforyou (07/20/2012) [-]
assaulted her? really? Go sue McDonalds for making you fat
User avatar #16 - badluck (07/20/2012) [-]
In the video you can see her smiling.
#12 - who the **** listens to the cupid shuffle when th…  [+] (13 new replies) 07/20/2012 on moves like jagger +4
User avatar #60 - velutluna (07/20/2012) [-]
I listen to a variety of music every day. One day I'll listen to Cupid Shuffle, the next I'll listen to Vivaldi. Day after I'll listen to Disturbed. Music is my life. Thanks for asking though!
User avatar #15 - spacefield (07/20/2012) [-]
velutluna <--this guy

and me
User avatar #61 - velutluna (07/20/2012) [-]
Wanna go to prom then? We could rock the house :)
User avatar #62 - spacefield (07/20/2012) [-]
I sprained my ankle last time I did the cupid shuffle at school. It was like a domino effect of people. Let's do it.
User avatar #63 - velutluna (07/20/2012) [-]
YES!! We'll do it again on purpose! Show these bitches what it's about :D I would use reaction pics but all of them are on my laptop.
User avatar #64 - spacefield (07/20/2012) [-]
I would use reaction pictures but my computer doesn't want me to. My ankle doesn't want me to either. haha.
User avatar #65 - velutluna (07/20/2012) [-]
aww well is your ankle getting any better?
#66 - spacefield (07/20/2012) [-]
yeah this was at homecoming a couple years ago.
User avatar #67 - velutluna (07/20/2012) [-]
Homecoming was fun. I never went to prom. Wanna be my date? lol
User avatar #68 - spacefield (07/26/2012) [-]
With out knowledge of gender, I will say yes. Reason being is that this is the internet. lol.
User avatar #69 - velutluna (07/27/2012) [-]
I'm a woman lol but I don't care if you are a man or a woman. Fun is fun, regardless of gender.
User avatar #70 - spacefield (07/28/2012) [-]
I be of the male gender:D
Fun is fun, until someone sprains an ankle lol.
User avatar #71 - velutluna (07/28/2012) [-]
hahahahaha that be funny. LET"S BOOGIE!!!!
#29 - >Knows how to mix work and play >Great view from off… 07/20/2012 on Now for something... 0
#14 - did she just ask to grow up in a single parent household? 07/20/2012 on Quality parenting +22
#27 - do your parents not give a **** or something? My …  [+] (4 new replies) 07/20/2012 on Average day +1
User avatar #162 - razorwind (07/20/2012) [-]
My mom does give a shit, I'm about to move out soon, so I don't think she really does anymore.
User avatar #179 - swimmingprodigy (07/21/2012) [-]
-_____- Im still a while away from moving out. Living at home for college, dont make enough money at my job to live on my own. Fucking rent in NYC is insane.
User avatar #180 - razorwind (07/21/2012) [-]
I don't have a job because there's too many people in VA. I'm only getting checks from my dad for now, but I hope that if I apply for a couple more jobs, I'll get one.
User avatar #181 - swimmingprodigy (07/21/2012) [-]
no offense but thats a really bullshit excuse. I live in NYV, am 17 years old, and still found myself a job. Usually employers dont like employing minors but i still got one. And this is a real job too, one that is on the books and pays taxes
#61 - you can use the idea of YOLO, just not the way all the teenage…  [+] (4 new replies) 07/20/2012 on Old funnyjunk? -2
#93 - peanutshawny (07/20/2012) [-]
or carpe diem=yolo for smart people
#64 - anonymous (07/20/2012) [-]
Other way around. Carpe Diem is YOLO for the intelligent.

Pic semi-relevant.
User avatar #74 - rokkarokkaali (07/20/2012) [-]
How would you pronounce Carpe Diem?
I feel like using it in real life situations.
And not in the,"I'm gonna get aids because YOLO kind of way.
User avatar #85 - axeul (07/20/2012) [-]
Car pay dee um
#13 - no wonder ur still a virgin 07/19/2012 on Motivation at the Gym -1
#677 - btw, what do you mean 'you want to be done with it'? You are d… 07/19/2012 on They have been deceiving us! 0
#676 - You seem like quite the catch. Too bad he didn't see that 07/19/2012 on They have been deceiving us! 0
#45 - my best friend (a straight girl) said she's hot. In this s…  [+] (2 new replies) 07/19/2012 on burned +1
User avatar #46 - DingoJ (07/19/2012) [-]
yeah it's probably her voice, it's so high whiny and annoying, i dont think i could deal with it
User avatar #55 - vatra (07/19/2012) [-]
Exactly, if she wasn't allowed to speak, it would be great
#43 - shut up, meg Is all I think of when I watch…  [+] (4 new replies) 07/19/2012 on burned +4
#44 - DingoJ (07/19/2012) [-]
jesus exactly XD i don't see why so many people find her attractive, but thats just me
User avatar #45 - swimmingprodigy (07/19/2012) [-]
my best friend (a straight girl) said she's hot.
In this show I dont see it, but in the few movies she's done...yea she actually is quite appealing. However I probably could not last longer than 1 night with her because every time she spoke an image of Meg would pop into my head
User avatar #46 - DingoJ (07/19/2012) [-]
yeah it's probably her voice, it's so high whiny and annoying, i dont think i could deal with it
User avatar #55 - vatra (07/19/2012) [-]
Exactly, if she wasn't allowed to speak, it would be great
#32 - exactly, it wouldve obliterated the whole front of the ship bu…  [+] (1 new reply) 07/19/2012 on Titanic 0
User avatar #33 - brainydud (07/19/2012) [-]
That's what I always heard. I never thought they would have sustained less damage smashing it.
#10 - you really need 4 lights??  [+] (1 new reply) 07/19/2012 on Zombies Beware 0
#18 - dshfdgf (07/19/2012) [-]
yeah, you're right.
I guess I need more like 5.

or 6.
#27 - This is the Internet, leave your morals at the door 07/19/2012 on hero's 0
#26 - yes but they did it cuz of hitler's birthday, not weed day 07/19/2012 on hero's 0
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User avatar #134 - swimmingprodigy (12/05/2013) [-]
**swimmingprodigy rolls 86**
User avatar #135 to #134 - swimmingprodigy (12/05/2013) [-]
**swimmingprodigy rolls 01**
User avatar #119 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
Trying to ask everyone I encounter on here, haha.
I started a creative writing channel, to share and provide criticism on stories.
You write? Would love some contributors.
User avatar #120 to #119 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
Well I''ve been told by many people that I'm an awesome writer, but I guess that's only when I have to be; in all honesty I hate writing with a burning passion. I'm not creative at all, I have no imagination, and I'm more of a science person.
User avatar #121 to #120 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
I've been told the same.
I'm creative, but my problem is my ideas sounding cool to all my friends (My current project is a source mod, but I'm writing it first.) Friends ******* ate up the concept and said I pitched it very well, but the things I think of are in my head just developing in there, so I've got soo much detail when I finally explain it to someone. I felt like I sounded high (My pills don't count as high, that ****** just there to calm me down. don't change my thoughts and I'm more concentrated so if anything it helps.)

Do you also have this problem with conveying your concepts after they've just been festering in your head? It's a really frustrating thing to happen and by the time I have it ready to write I don't know where to start, but I still remember every last little detail that I think of.
Sorry for getting ******* off-topic, sheesh, I'm a rambler, skipped the pill this morning.
Sorry if a waste of time.

By the way, depending on what kind of science you're into, (Aeronautics for me, especially, and weapon-science) I could tell you about my story concept.
It involves a space program, but it's action/horror-ish.
Also, main character sports a Mercury spaceuit (best spacesuit) and the MBA GyroJet as signature weapon (because it can fire in space).
If you'd bare with me, I could find you the one I'd written down previously.
Just warning you now though, it's a ******* run on sentence, I was in no way in the mood to tackle the entire story or oragnize my thoughts, so I just jotted down main ideas basically.
#122 to #121 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
I find when I'm writing essays for school I'll think of an epic line that I want to use in like a minute or two, and then I forget it and I'm so pissed at myself because nothing else sounds a good as what I originally planned. But I'm never written anything nearly as long as what you're describing, so I can't relate. Longest thing I've ever written was a 22-paged technical description of the longboard I made from scratch last summer.

As for the science I'm into; Im mainly into cars (that's my hobby) but when I was little I was really interested in military aircraft because I always wanted to be an Air Force Pilot. Now my major in college is civil engineering so I focus mainly on buildings. But I do know a lot about space because that interested me too when I was a kid. I used to read ******** of books when I was little; my friends say I'm like a walking encyclopedia. I just know tons of facts about everything. I would kick ass at Jeopardy
#123 to #122 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
10/10 seems like a pretty cool dude. We could definitely get along.

And that was a very frustrating thing for me, too, but doesn't even happen very often anymore, so I am glad I am able to remember so that I am not pressured to write it right on the spot.

I am planning on taking a creative-writing class once I go to college.
Kinda bothers me that they have stuff like Japanese, but they can't have a creative-writing class.

And I assume then that you know of the Mercury Space Project?
User avatar #124 to #123 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
You're most likely going to have to; everyone freshman is required to take a writing class. Mine was called Freshman Inquiry Question-based Writing Seminar (FIQWS for short). It was a pain in my asshole. And yes, Inquiry Question is redundant. Idk why they chose that name lol.

If you're referring to the early Space Race and NASA trying to put at guy into orbit around space before the Russians, then yes I know
User avatar #126 to #124 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
and yes that is the space program of which I am referencing.
User avatar #125 to #124 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
Sounds like my thing, unless if the professor is a pretentious left-wing douchebag who'll **** on you if your work reflects anything but a positive portrayal of complete government control and Totolitarianism/Dystopian societies (Many times I have heard tales of these types of guys treating students they didn't agree with politically like **** .)
User avatar #127 to #125 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
Nah that's mainly a movies thing. Most professors have to be tolerant. Mine was pretty cool. I had to write an essay about classifying things that usually people never put into categories. For example, my essay was "the three types of guitar players" (I play guitar so I have a sort of inside knowledge). The entire essay was hilarious and my professor loved it. Here's my intro paragraph:

All guitar players seem to have an air of arrogance and think that they're better than everyone else, whether they're just starting out or have been playing for years. All three believe that their guitar playing will make them popular, in one way or another. This is why I don't like guitar players even though I am one myself. Guitar players can be classified into three major categories according to how well they play and how highly they think of themselves: the attention whores, the "I'm gonna be a rock star", and the snobby musicians.
User avatar #128 to #127 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
I agree with that opening 101%

Snobby musicians- Do the douchebags that bring their guitars to bonfires fall under this one?

Also, I wasn't trying to make a jab at all left-wing-ists. I have common ground with many liberal topics, even though I believe in free enterprise, capitalism, and the second ammendment.

I'd kinda put myself under liberitarian, maybe, that's as close I can think of, fiscally conservative, (Gotta admit, liberals=not the best with money Most jews are liberal, but I mean liberals in power don't spend on the right stuff )
but socially liberal i.e gay rights, ( I disagree with a lot of their other social points, but there are a good handful I completely agree with.)
What are you when it comes to politics?

Before I asked all this, I should've found out what country you're in, though, aha
User avatar #129 to #128 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
Im in New York, US of A.

BTW here's my paragraph about the snobby musicians. I think it's pretty funny:

Lastly we come to the snobby 'professional' musicians. You know these too. Especially living in New York City and going to school in Manhattan, you've seen them. Their parents are artists, but at the tender age of six they had an epiphany (meaning their parents decided for them) that they're going to be professional musicians. They can be easily spotted walking out of Starbucks with a venti-sized caffe vanilla frappuccino light, 1 shot of espresso, 2 sugars, a metric ounce of soy milk, 3 drops of unicorn blood, and a sprinkle of edible gold foil no foam while on their way to the Julliard School. If you say you play guitar around them, they will quiz you. They will judge you. And if you can't repeat the D-flat-7 augmented 5th pentatonic scale in 6th position off the top of your head, they will shun you. The snobby musicians practice guitar for 19 hours a day, or until they get blisters on their blistered blisters. They are more finicky and more anal at getting a piece right than NASA is about landing a Rover on Mars. It is true that they are great musicians; I just don't think they have to be so conceited about it.

As for politics, I try not to involve myself too much in that. It's not that I'm completely ignorant; I know what each party is and what they stand for; I just don't really tend to agree with any one group and it just doesn't interest me enough.
#133 to #129 - tender (09/20/2013) [-]
Name was mentioned, TL;DR'd the **** outta here
User avatar #130 to #129 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
I'm heading off FJ because there's a friend that need some help right now, but I want you to know you're the best conversational partner I've encountered on FJ thus far.
Continue "doing your thang", you relatable man, you.
User avatar #131 to #130 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
same here dude. Check ya around. Tell me how it goes tomorrow (Friday right?)
have fun man
User avatar #132 to #131 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
haha, of course!
User avatar #117 - pellonpoika (07/09/2013) [-]
Your gifs with source- posts are great. You earned a new subscriber, keep it up man!
User avatar #118 to #117 - swimmingprodigy (07/09/2013) [-]
when i get back from work today around 9 PM EST ill post a few more
User avatar #113 - khl (05/12/2013) [-]
Hey man I know the dude below me asked but are you trading points for items ?
User avatar #114 to #113 - swimmingprodigy (05/12/2013) [-]
nah Im hoarding my points for some reason
User avatar #115 to #114 - khl (05/12/2013) [-]
your choice man, cheers anyways
User avatar #109 to #108 - swimmingprodigy (09/28/2012) [-]
**** yea.

you forgot his 3rd leg which is supposed to be holding a bottle of vodka
#105 - mniam (09/22/2012) [-]
kurwa, znalazłam! Polak!
kurwa, znalazłam! Polak!
User avatar #107 to #106 - mniam (09/22/2012) [-]
#103 - filsoc **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #104 to #103 - swimmingprodigy (08/16/2012) [-]
siema, kolego!
User avatar #87 - seniorpokeman (08/07/2012) [-]
I feel like I see a ******* of your comments around...
Hi swimmingprodigy ._.
User avatar #88 to #87 - swimmingprodigy (08/07/2012) [-]
it might be because I comment a ******* on most posts lol
What's up?
User avatar #89 to #88 - seniorpokeman (08/07/2012) [-]
Not much. Just bein' German is all. You?
User avatar #90 to #89 - swimmingprodigy (08/08/2012) [-]
eh not much. Enjoyin summer vacation in between work as much as i can
User avatar #91 to #90 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
same here. (at least I was, then I quit my job) You still in high school too?
User avatar #92 to #91 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
graduated this year. Whyd u quit?
User avatar #93 to #92 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
I was one of 4 maintenance guys. 2 of the others had mothers that worked there and the other one had special needs, so in turn, I was the only one my boss was able to express his anger towards without getting problems. Plus, one of the other guys there became a massive douche and started ignoring me after I yelled at him (He was eating ice cream during the hours we still had to work, forcing me to finish up one of the jobs that he didn't do even though I had my two cousins waiting in the parking lot with no airconditioning, [plus one is severely autistic, so he basically made my autistic cousin wait in a hot car for a while because he wanted to eat ice cream]). So after he started being a dick to me, even though he used to be one of my best friends, I decided that the pay (which was far under minimum wage) wasn't good enough, and I left. My boss was also a major douche to me on the way out, claiming I needed my hand held for everything I did, even though he always was the one interfering with what I was doing without me asking for his help.

What makes me laugh though is that I was out for one day, and when I came back the next day, my boss was complaining about how the day's job was done terribly, and that we needed to make sure we never ****** up that badly again. Or, in other words, when I'm not there, things get ****** up.
User avatar #94 to #93 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
wow, sounds like a pretty ****** story. Nice to know I dont have these problems and I work for over minimum wage pay. You should try lifeguarding. It's worth the 300 bucks u pay for the course
User avatar #95 to #94 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
Hmm... I am part Cuban... this could work
User avatar #96 to #95 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
do eet. Idk about your local area, but where I am, EVERY SINGLE YMCA is short on lifeguards so youre guaranteed a job
User avatar #97 to #96 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
But at the same time, I'd like to be able to focus on mein writing a bit. I'm still 16, so this may be one of the last few summers I have to work on my novels before constant work.. so I don't know
User avatar #98 to #97 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
you dont need constant work. ur 16 that means ur gonna be a junior right?

And u can set your own hours and it doesn't have to be constant work. For example, I only work Mondays Wednesdays and Fridays
User avatar #99 to #98 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
yeah, i guess that's true. but being a lifeguard also seems like a job that needs aLOT of fucos, which I do not have :I
User avatar #101 to #99 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]

Youre SUPPOSED to be focused, but most of the time i zone out. Actually a lot of the time i zone out. No one gives a **** . Dont worry. I highly recommend it, easiest job on the planet
User avatar #102 to #101 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
lol, very true.
There was one girl in my old school that was a big-time stoner. She even took pictures of herself with a massive bag of pot and put it on facebook. Now she's the head life guard at the pool of the town i used to live in. :P
User avatar #100 to #99 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
User avatar #86 - unncommon (07/07/2012) [-]
Someone **** all over your pillow man.
#85 - anonymous (07/07/2012) [-]
Dude, someone made a poopie on your pillow.
#84 - spursfan **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #83 - irenecloud (07/07/2012) [-]
I shat on your pillow, dude...
Just saying.
User avatar #80 - TheAnonLord (03/25/2012) [-]
Easier to chat hear but my brother is using the PS3 right now :/
User avatar #82 to #146 - swimmingprodigy (03/25/2012) [-]
ok i successfully added you
User avatar #81 to #146 - swimmingprodigy (03/25/2012) [-]
i see. Could you type your PSN name exactly for me one more time so it's easier for me? Also, what are 'those dopes'?
User avatar #79 - redfang (03/16/2012) [-]
User avatar #78 - fizzled (03/16/2012) [-]
NIGER ****** ****** NEGRO
User avatar #76 - doctorbamf (03/16/2012) [-]
******* ******* these days...
User avatar #77 to #142 - swimmingprodigy (03/16/2012) [-]
Im sorry! I couldnt help it, your bike was just so shiny
#73 - pemdazfunny (03/16/2012) [-]
User avatar #71 - samxdaxman (03/16/2012) [-]
nigger nigger nigger nigger
#70 - mrteabag (03/16/2012) [-]
I'm truly sorry to say that you're a ****** .
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