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swimmingprodigy

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Date Signed Up:3/17/2010
Last Login:5/23/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#1874
Highest Content Rank:#341
Highest Comment Rank:#131
Content Thumbs: 18100 total,  21008 ,  2908
Comment Thumbs: 45242 total,  55851 ,  10609
Content Level Progress: 2.9% (29/1000)
Level 218 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 219 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 29.5% (295/1000)
Level 343 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 344 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:24
Content Views:388846
Times Content Favorited:1896 times
Total Comments Made:15101
FJ Points:62335
Favorite Tags: a (3) | Apple (2) | epic (2) | justin (2) | lol (2) | Mario (2) | remi (2)

latest user's comments

#150 - cis is pronounced like sis and if basically means you're norma… 03/31/2015 on Fucking Stupid Feminazi Comp 0
#123 - Well everybody ******* knows that. But you don…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/30/2015 on It's clever I guess +1
User avatar #129 - stallwallwriter (03/31/2015) [-]
Actually, the rate of false accusations when it comes to rape is estimated to be between 3 and 8%, comparable to the rates of false reporting for burglary and auto theft. So as long as you're getting a big a-okay from her when you go to have sex, you can probably rest easy.
#51 - actually more that that. It would take a little over a year to… 03/30/2015 on Mighty Title 0
#50 - A typical beginner cycle of steroids is 500mg of testosterone-…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/30/2015 on Mighty Title 0
User avatar #51 - swimmingprodigy (03/30/2015) [-]
actually more that that. It would take a little over a year to put on that much muscle naturally
#22 - good thing cuz that's a sauna 03/30/2015 on comfy +8
#45 - Daily reminder that there's a very high chance that Bieber was… 03/30/2015 on Mighty Title 0
#44 - there's no way bieber isn't (wasnt) on steroids. He got ripped…  [+] (3 new replies) 03/30/2015 on Mighty Title 0
#49 - anonymous (03/30/2015) [-]
Exactly how quickly? How many weeks? What's the average amount of time it would take to do that many muscle without steroids?
User avatar #50 - swimmingprodigy (03/30/2015) [-]
A typical beginner cycle of steroids is 500mg of testosterone-e per week for about 14-16 weeks. Because test-e is a long ester, it takes 4 weeks for the test to build up in your blood stream to its max. Because of this people often take an oral steroid such as dianabol for the first 4-6 weeks of their cycle, about 50mg per day.

A 16 week cycle of test with 6 weeks of dianabol, it's very possible that with proper diet and routine he put on 25lbs total, of which 15-20lbs would be muscle.

By contrast, it would take a beginner who just started training at least 30-40 weeks to put on that much
User avatar #51 - swimmingprodigy (03/30/2015) [-]
actually more that that. It would take a little over a year to put on that much muscle naturally
#13 - whatever is in DEBATE **** is what they presented and l… 03/30/2015 on School 0
#99 - Netflix is a huge company dude, they'd have more than enough m… 03/29/2015 on What James May has been up... 0
#80 - It's hard to say. But it's (now) very clear that all 3 are lea… 03/28/2015 on What James May has been up... 0
#76 - there have been talks that the 3 and the main producer have al…  [+] (5 new replies) 03/28/2015 on What James May has been up... +5
User avatar #98 - aabbccddeeffgghhii (03/29/2015) [-]
Censorship? What censorship?
User avatar #95 - vgmddg (03/29/2015) [-]
Maybe, but I'm guessing most of their money for the show came from the BBC, so if they went solo they wouldn't be able to show off the supercars they did before. without that it's mostly just the skits and that throws off the balance of the show.
User avatar #99 - swimmingprodigy (03/29/2015) [-]
Netflix is a huge company dude, they'd have more than enough money for supercars
User avatar #79 - maximumpotato (03/28/2015) [-]
Man, that actually sounds great. Of course, the rumor-mill will be working nonstop right now so I wouldn't get too excited, but I would be surprised if they all just went their seperate ways.
User avatar #80 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
It's hard to say. But it's (now) very clear that all 3 are leaving the show. On Wednesday when it was officially announced that Jeremy got sacked, reports were outside May's house for a reaction and he said that "the 3 of us are very much a package deal".

I would be surprised if they dont do another show though. At least May and Clarkson like working with one another, I know they're not as buddy-buddy with the Hamster
#74 - doesnt matter if another channel buys the rights to top gear. …  [+] (7 new replies) 03/28/2015 on What James May has been up... 0
User avatar #75 - maximumpotato (03/28/2015) [-]
That actually seems exactly like the kind of thing Jeremy Clarkson would do.
User avatar #76 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
there have been talks that the 3 and the main producer have all been considering a deal with Netflix and basically continuing the show. And on Netflix they'd have no censorship at all and Clarkson could make all of the mexican and pollack jokes he already does.

I'm sad that the old Top Gear ended but excited to see what will happen
User avatar #98 - aabbccddeeffgghhii (03/29/2015) [-]
Censorship? What censorship?
User avatar #95 - vgmddg (03/29/2015) [-]
Maybe, but I'm guessing most of their money for the show came from the BBC, so if they went solo they wouldn't be able to show off the supercars they did before. without that it's mostly just the skits and that throws off the balance of the show.
User avatar #99 - swimmingprodigy (03/29/2015) [-]
Netflix is a huge company dude, they'd have more than enough money for supercars
User avatar #79 - maximumpotato (03/28/2015) [-]
Man, that actually sounds great. Of course, the rumor-mill will be working nonstop right now so I wouldn't get too excited, but I would be surprised if they all just went their seperate ways.
User avatar #80 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
It's hard to say. But it's (now) very clear that all 3 are leaving the show. On Wednesday when it was officially announced that Jeremy got sacked, reports were outside May's house for a reaction and he said that "the 3 of us are very much a package deal".

I would be surprised if they dont do another show though. At least May and Clarkson like working with one another, I know they're not as buddy-buddy with the Hamster
#117 - You're right. I sort of interpreted your original comment as y… 03/28/2015 on Fat Shaming Friday Comp 3 0
#115 - ah, I had no idea you're a woman. That does change things. 220…  [+] (2 new replies) 03/28/2015 on Fat Shaming Friday Comp 3 0
#116 - delphine (03/28/2015) [-]
I eat all of those things. I don't like to track my diet, I figure as long as I eat only when I'm hungry, and eat things that are nutritious, I'll be fine. I have absolutely no problem lifting all the clay, and people are surprised that it's easy for me, because my muscle is pretty lean you don't really notice it until I actually lift something. I feel good, and have a lot of energy.

I was just trying to make the point that women can lift, but will typically just look lean instead of bulky (unless there's steroids involved)
User avatar #117 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
You're right. I sort of interpreted your original comment as you questioning why you're so tiny if you can lift 50lb bricks.

In the end I'm saying you would grow more muscle if you ate more, but you eat enough to build strength. There's two different types of hypertrophy and to a certain extent you can get stronger without getting bigger, but that's mainly the central nervous system adapting to progressively heavier loads
#112 - I find it hilarious how women think they'll get huge from a fe… 03/28/2015 on Fat Shaming Friday Comp 3 +2
#108 - that's because you dont eat enough. The protein may be there b…  [+] (4 new replies) 03/28/2015 on Fat Shaming Friday Comp 3 0
User avatar #113 - delphine (03/28/2015) [-]
I am a 5'1" woman. There's no way I can fit 3000 calories into my stomach unless I eat nothing but protein shakes. And I eat just fine.
User avatar #115 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
ah, I had no idea you're a woman. That does change things. 2200 calories should be enough for you to put on muscle.

And you'd be surprised; I make shakes which total 1500 calories of which protein powder makes up only about 300 calories. The main portion is banana, cottage cheese, peanut butter, oats, and milk
#116 - delphine (03/28/2015) [-]
I eat all of those things. I don't like to track my diet, I figure as long as I eat only when I'm hungry, and eat things that are nutritious, I'll be fine. I have absolutely no problem lifting all the clay, and people are surprised that it's easy for me, because my muscle is pretty lean you don't really notice it until I actually lift something. I feel good, and have a lot of energy.

I was just trying to make the point that women can lift, but will typically just look lean instead of bulky (unless there's steroids involved)
User avatar #117 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
You're right. I sort of interpreted your original comment as you questioning why you're so tiny if you can lift 50lb bricks.

In the end I'm saying you would grow more muscle if you ate more, but you eat enough to build strength. There's two different types of hypertrophy and to a certain extent you can get stronger without getting bigger, but that's mainly the central nervous system adapting to progressively heavier loads
#28 - The Next Episode by Dr Dre ft Snoop Dogg  [+] (1 new reply) 03/28/2015 on Assorted Internets 12.5 :... 0
User avatar #52 - assdoreponyfucker (03/28/2015) [-]
tty
#62 - looks like exactly what I said, he clocked her right in the ja… 03/28/2015 on Don’t Be Surprised if He... 0
#85 - that looks ****** awesome, If that was around my neighb… 03/28/2015 on Sure, why not? 0
#58 - I haven't seen the video so I dont know but you'd be surprised…  [+] (2 new replies) 03/28/2015 on Don’t Be Surprised if He... 0
User avatar #62 - swimmingprodigy (03/28/2015) [-]
looks like exactly what I said, he clocked her right in the jaw. Instant knockout, it doesnt even take that much force
#45 - she's right though; I dont have the 8 inch dick required to pe… 03/28/2015 on nice meme lardass +4
#59 - it's an ebin maymay whose format follow as such: "So … 03/28/2015 on Graduation Troll Sister +2
#66 - contacts 03/27/2015 on Black Twitter Compilation #54 0
#65 - hairspray cant melt steel beams 03/27/2015 on Black Twitter Compilation #54 +1
#22 - Not everything is CSI, dumbass. He'd go to the hospital, t… 03/27/2015 on Become a 4chan user with... +6

items

Total unique items point value: 2100 / Total items point value: 2300

Comments(134):

[ 134 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #139 - cognosceteipsum (04/23/2015) [-]
Silly Polack, you sit on top of toilets, not dive into them
#138 - anonymous (02/18/2015) [-]
*roll 00-99*
User avatar #137 - patriotprideboy (12/25/2014) [-]
PolskaRezystans?
User avatar #134 - swimmingprodigy (12/05/2013) [-]
**swimmingprodigy rolls 86**
User avatar #135 to #134 - swimmingprodigy (12/05/2013) [-]
**swimmingprodigy rolls 01**
User avatar #119 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
Trying to ask everyone I encounter on here, haha.
I started a creative writing channel, to share and provide criticism on stories.
You write? Would love some contributors.
User avatar #120 to #119 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
Well I''ve been told by many people that I'm an awesome writer, but I guess that's only when I have to be; in all honesty I hate writing with a burning passion. I'm not creative at all, I have no imagination, and I'm more of a science person.
User avatar #121 to #120 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
I've been told the same.
I'm creative, but my problem is my ideas sounding cool to all my friends (My current project is a source mod, but I'm writing it first.) Friends ******* ate up the concept and said I pitched it very well, but the things I think of are in my head just developing in there, so I've got soo much detail when I finally explain it to someone. I felt like I sounded high (My pills don't count as high, that ****** just there to calm me down. don't change my thoughts and I'm more concentrated so if anything it helps.)

Do you also have this problem with conveying your concepts after they've just been festering in your head? It's a really frustrating thing to happen and by the time I have it ready to write I don't know where to start, but I still remember every last little detail that I think of.
Sorry for getting ******* off-topic, sheesh, I'm a rambler, skipped the pill this morning.
Sorry if a waste of time.



By the way, depending on what kind of science you're into, (Aeronautics for me, especially, and weapon-science) I could tell you about my story concept.
It involves a space program, but it's action/horror-ish.
Also, main character sports a Mercury spaceuit (best spacesuit) and the MBA GyroJet as signature weapon (because it can fire in space).
If you'd bare with me, I could find you the one I'd written down previously.
Just warning you now though, it's a ******* run on sentence, I was in no way in the mood to tackle the entire story or oragnize my thoughts, so I just jotted down main ideas basically.
#122 to #121 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
I find when I'm writing essays for school I'll think of an epic line that I want to use in like a minute or two, and then I forget it and I'm so pissed at myself because nothing else sounds a good as what I originally planned. But I'm never written anything nearly as long as what you're describing, so I can't relate. Longest thing I've ever written was a 22-paged technical description of the longboard I made from scratch last summer.

As for the science I'm into; Im mainly into cars (that's my hobby) but when I was little I was really interested in military aircraft because I always wanted to be an Air Force Pilot. Now my major in college is civil engineering so I focus mainly on buildings. But I do know a lot about space because that interested me too when I was a kid. I used to read ******** of books when I was little; my friends say I'm like a walking encyclopedia. I just know tons of facts about everything. I would kick ass at Jeopardy
#123 to #122 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
10/10 seems like a pretty cool dude. We could definitely get along.

And that was a very frustrating thing for me, too, but doesn't even happen very often anymore, so I am glad I am able to remember so that I am not pressured to write it right on the spot.

I am planning on taking a creative-writing class once I go to college.
Kinda bothers me that they have stuff like Japanese, but they can't have a creative-writing class.

And I assume then that you know of the Mercury Space Project?
User avatar #124 to #123 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
You're most likely going to have to; everyone freshman is required to take a writing class. Mine was called Freshman Inquiry Question-based Writing Seminar (FIQWS for short). It was a pain in my asshole. And yes, Inquiry Question is redundant. Idk why they chose that name lol.

If you're referring to the early Space Race and NASA trying to put at guy into orbit around space before the Russians, then yes I know
User avatar #126 to #124 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
and yes that is the space program of which I am referencing.
User avatar #125 to #124 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
Sounds like my thing, unless if the professor is a pretentious left-wing douchebag who'll **** on you if your work reflects anything but a positive portrayal of complete government control and Totolitarianism/Dystopian societies (Many times I have heard tales of these types of guys treating students they didn't agree with politically like **** .)
User avatar #127 to #125 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
Nah that's mainly a movies thing. Most professors have to be tolerant. Mine was pretty cool. I had to write an essay about classifying things that usually people never put into categories. For example, my essay was "the three types of guitar players" (I play guitar so I have a sort of inside knowledge). The entire essay was hilarious and my professor loved it. Here's my intro paragraph:

All guitar players seem to have an air of arrogance and think that they're better than everyone else, whether they're just starting out or have been playing for years. All three believe that their guitar playing will make them popular, in one way or another. This is why I don't like guitar players even though I am one myself. Guitar players can be classified into three major categories according to how well they play and how highly they think of themselves: the attention whores, the "I'm gonna be a rock star", and the snobby musicians.
User avatar #128 to #127 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
I agree with that opening 101%

Snobby musicians- Do the douchebags that bring their guitars to bonfires fall under this one?

Also, I wasn't trying to make a jab at all left-wing-ists. I have common ground with many liberal topics, even though I believe in free enterprise, capitalism, and the second ammendment.

I'd kinda put myself under liberitarian, maybe, that's as close I can think of, fiscally conservative, (Gotta admit, liberals=not the best with money Most jews are liberal, but I mean liberals in power don't spend on the right stuff )
but socially liberal i.e gay rights, ( I disagree with a lot of their other social points, but there are a good handful I completely agree with.)
What are you when it comes to politics?

Before I asked all this, I should've found out what country you're in, though, aha
User avatar #129 to #128 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
Im in New York, US of A.

BTW here's my paragraph about the snobby musicians. I think it's pretty funny:

Lastly we come to the snobby 'professional' musicians. You know these too. Especially living in New York City and going to school in Manhattan, you've seen them. Their parents are artists, but at the tender age of six they had an epiphany (meaning their parents decided for them) that they're going to be professional musicians. They can be easily spotted walking out of Starbucks with a venti-sized caffe vanilla frappuccino light, 1 shot of espresso, 2 sugars, a metric ounce of soy milk, 3 drops of unicorn blood, and a sprinkle of edible gold foil no foam while on their way to the Julliard School. If you say you play guitar around them, they will quiz you. They will judge you. And if you can't repeat the D-flat-7 augmented 5th pentatonic scale in 6th position off the top of your head, they will shun you. The snobby musicians practice guitar for 19 hours a day, or until they get blisters on their blistered blisters. They are more finicky and more anal at getting a piece right than NASA is about landing a Rover on Mars. It is true that they are great musicians; I just don't think they have to be so conceited about it.


As for politics, I try not to involve myself too much in that. It's not that I'm completely ignorant; I know what each party is and what they stand for; I just don't really tend to agree with any one group and it just doesn't interest me enough.
#133 to #129 - tender (09/20/2013) [-]
Name was mentioned, TL;DR'd the **** outta here
User avatar #130 to #129 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
Fave'd
I'm heading off FJ because there's a friend that need some help right now, but I want you to know you're the best conversational partner I've encountered on FJ thus far.
Continue "doing your thang", you relatable man, you.
User avatar #131 to #130 - swimmingprodigy (09/20/2013) [-]
same here dude. Check ya around. Tell me how it goes tomorrow (Friday right?)
have fun man
User avatar #132 to #131 - yorker (09/20/2013) [-]
haha, of course!
User avatar #117 - pellonpoika (07/09/2013) [-]
Your gifs with source- posts are great. You earned a new subscriber, keep it up man!
User avatar #118 to #117 - swimmingprodigy (07/09/2013) [-]
when i get back from work today around 9 PM EST ill post a few more
User avatar #113 - khl (05/12/2013) [-]
Hey man I know the dude below me asked but are you trading points for items ?
User avatar #114 to #113 - swimmingprodigy (05/12/2013) [-]
nah Im hoarding my points for some reason
User avatar #115 to #114 - khl (05/12/2013) [-]
your choice man, cheers anyways
User avatar #109 to #108 - swimmingprodigy (09/28/2012) [-]
**** yea.

you forgot his 3rd leg which is supposed to be holding a bottle of vodka
#105 - mniam (09/22/2012) [-]
kurwa, znalazłam! Polak!
kurwa, znalazłam! Polak!
User avatar #107 to #106 - mniam (09/22/2012) [-]
Siema!
#103 - filsoc **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #104 to #103 - swimmingprodigy (08/16/2012) [-]
siema, kolego!
User avatar #87 - seniorpokeman (08/07/2012) [-]
I feel like I see a ******* of your comments around...
Hi swimmingprodigy ._.
User avatar #88 to #87 - swimmingprodigy (08/07/2012) [-]
it might be because I comment a ******* on most posts lol
What's up?
User avatar #89 to #88 - seniorpokeman (08/07/2012) [-]
Not much. Just bein' German is all. You?
User avatar #90 to #89 - swimmingprodigy (08/08/2012) [-]
eh not much. Enjoyin summer vacation in between work as much as i can
User avatar #91 to #90 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
same here. (at least I was, then I quit my job) You still in high school too?
User avatar #92 to #91 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
graduated this year. Whyd u quit?
User avatar #93 to #92 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
I was one of 4 maintenance guys. 2 of the others had mothers that worked there and the other one had special needs, so in turn, I was the only one my boss was able to express his anger towards without getting problems. Plus, one of the other guys there became a massive douche and started ignoring me after I yelled at him (He was eating ice cream during the hours we still had to work, forcing me to finish up one of the jobs that he didn't do even though I had my two cousins waiting in the parking lot with no airconditioning, [plus one is severely autistic, so he basically made my autistic cousin wait in a hot car for a while because he wanted to eat ice cream]). So after he started being a dick to me, even though he used to be one of my best friends, I decided that the pay (which was far under minimum wage) wasn't good enough, and I left. My boss was also a major douche to me on the way out, claiming I needed my hand held for everything I did, even though he always was the one interfering with what I was doing without me asking for his help.

What makes me laugh though is that I was out for one day, and when I came back the next day, my boss was complaining about how the day's job was done terribly, and that we needed to make sure we never ****** up that badly again. Or, in other words, when I'm not there, things get ****** up.
User avatar #94 to #93 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
wow, sounds like a pretty ****** story. Nice to know I dont have these problems and I work for over minimum wage pay. You should try lifeguarding. It's worth the 300 bucks u pay for the course
User avatar #95 to #94 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
Hmm... I am part Cuban... this could work
User avatar #96 to #95 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
do eet. Idk about your local area, but where I am, EVERY SINGLE YMCA is short on lifeguards so youre guaranteed a job
User avatar #97 to #96 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
But at the same time, I'd like to be able to focus on mein writing a bit. I'm still 16, so this may be one of the last few summers I have to work on my novels before constant work.. so I don't know
User avatar #98 to #97 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
you dont need constant work. ur 16 that means ur gonna be a junior right?

And u can set your own hours and it doesn't have to be constant work. For example, I only work Mondays Wednesdays and Fridays
User avatar #99 to #98 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
yeah, i guess that's true. but being a lifeguard also seems like a job that needs aLOT of fucos, which I do not have :I
User avatar #101 to #99 - swimmingprodigy (08/09/2012) [-]
lolno.

Youre SUPPOSED to be focused, but most of the time i zone out. Actually a lot of the time i zone out. No one gives a **** . Dont worry. I highly recommend it, easiest job on the planet
User avatar #102 to #101 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
lol, very true.
There was one girl in my old school that was a big-time stoner. She even took pictures of herself with a massive bag of pot and put it on facebook. Now she's the head life guard at the pool of the town i used to live in. :P
User avatar #100 to #99 - seniorpokeman (08/09/2012) [-]
*focus
User avatar #86 - unncommon (07/07/2012) [-]
Someone **** all over your pillow man.
#85 - anonymous (07/07/2012) [-]
Dude, someone made a poopie on your pillow.
#84 - spursfan **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #83 - irenecloud (07/07/2012) [-]
I shat on your pillow, dude...
Just saying.
User avatar #80 - TheAnonLord (03/25/2012) [-]
Easier to chat hear but my brother is using the PS3 right now :/
User avatar #82 to #146 - swimmingprodigy (03/25/2012) [-]
ok i successfully added you
User avatar #81 to #146 - swimmingprodigy (03/25/2012) [-]
i see. Could you type your PSN name exactly for me one more time so it's easier for me? Also, what are 'those dopes'?
User avatar #79 - redfang (03/16/2012) [-]
you ******
User avatar #78 - fizzled (03/16/2012) [-]
NIGER ****** ****** NEGRO
User avatar #76 - doctorbamf (03/16/2012) [-]
******* ******* these days...
User avatar #77 to #142 - swimmingprodigy (03/16/2012) [-]
Im sorry! I couldnt help it, your bike was just so shiny
#73 - pemdazfunny (03/16/2012) [-]
Nigeritis
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