I've had it pop up in my mind now and again... less so recently, as my life has, against the odds, gone astonishingly far uphill... but I have never come close to doing it again. Like I said, that panic that I felt was so horrifying that I'm pretty sure I'm more afraid of feeling it again than death. There's a certain detachment that you feel towards the idea of death because, well, by definition you can't have experienced it. But I've experienced coming very very close, and the memory of that is a very good guarantee that I will never try to take my life again, no matter what happens.

I was at the time bedridden due to something rather awful which I'm not particularly eager to discuss. Basically I had massive injuries both external and internal, and I attempted to cut some of the bindings around my body as well as my wrists. In a pretty grim twist of irony, the only thing that saved me was that I was too weak to use the knife properly, so I didn't fully bleed out before my cousins caught me.

I've had it pop up in my mind now and again... less so recently, as my life has, against the odds, gone astonishingly far uphill... but I have never come close to doing it again. Like I said, that panic that I felt was so horrifying that I'm pretty sure I'm more afraid of feeling it again than death. There's a certain detachment that you feel towards the idea of death because, well, by definition you can't have experienced it. But I've experienced coming very very close, and the memory of that is a very good guarantee that I will never try to take my life again, no matter what happens.

i just got that, kind of disappointed with the amount of heretical protagonists but its good so far

I also get hot over cheek kissing.