meringueluka
Rank #52 on Content
Level 330 Comments: Practically Famous Online
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| Last status update: | i suddenly just remembered part of my dream that involved me being a 16 year old boy sleeping with a hooker -_- wtf?comment |
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| Personal Info | |
| Gender: | female |
| Date Signed Up: | 6/21/2013 |
| Last Login: | 1/12/2016 |
| Location: | Crypton |
| FunnyJunk Career Stats | |
| Content Ranking: | #52 |
| Comment Ranking: | #481 |
| Highest Content Rank: | #17 |
| Highest Comment Rank: | #136 |
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| Content Level Progress: | 57.79% (5779/10000) Level 317 Content: Wizard → Level 318 Content: Wizard |
| Comment Level Progress: | 39.2% (392/1000) Level 330 Comments: Practically Famous → Level 331 Comments: Practically Famous |
| Subscribers: | 118 |
| Content Views: | 11562464 |
| Times Content Favorited: | 22349 times |
| Total Comments Made: | 5945 |
| FJ Points: | 206180 |
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latest user's comments
| #34 - god dam it, who let feupy direct a gum add [+] (1 new reply) | 06/18/2015 on How to give your friends... | +2 |
| #58 - never really been into BDSM, but **** do i love the loo… [+] (1 new reply) | 06/18/2015 on kitty kitty | 0 |
 >2015 >not into hardcore candle wax-barb wire hanging bdsm git gud kid | ||
| #2 - you people have a very strange view on how GRS/SRS works. | 06/18/2015 on Split my dick | 0 |
| #186 - **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rol… [+] (1 new reply) | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
 Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #179 - **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rol… [+] (3 new replies) | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #173 - i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip … [+] (5 new replies) | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #151 - i land with a soft thud, my breathing is starting to get heavy… [+] (7 new replies) | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| Your attacks prove effective, dispatching the horrific Ogre without too much trouble. However, his companions are more of a handful, and while you focus on the massive beast, they swipe at your back with their daggers! homestuckxplain rolls 28 homestuckxplain rolls 10 A hit! One of them draws blood on your exposed back, and the wound quickly festers with heat and itchiness., causing you to lose one health! MeringueLuka - 5/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip hard to divert the pain, i bit down so hard i almost break the skin. i spin on my heel brining my now fairly bloody hammer straight towards the closest Imps cranium, using the moment of my swing i spring myself to my feet and dive out of reach of the imps, cringing slightly as i land, my back searing in pain. Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #57 - i can get about every other word. | 06/18/2015 on Robin Williams on golf | +1 |
| #128 - ffs, im so dumb weapon roll: homestuckxplain | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| #127 - Comment deleted | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| #126 - **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rol… [+] (11 new replies) | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| #131 -
homestuckxplain (06/18/2015) [-]  Your hammer is a light one, but a light hammer to the face is always deadly. Your blow connects into his teeth, shattering them and sending him reeling. As you land, he falls down besides you, a terrible howl of pain echoing around the cavern you are in. The two Imps reunite with each other, and press forward, waving their daggers at you. homestuckxplain rolls 30 homestuckxplain rolls 29 Fortunately though, they seem to be overcome with a strange transformation, fluffy hair erupting from head, arms and feet as their necks grow long and thick. Whether this is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen, but now is the time to strike! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - Stunned Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i land with a soft thud, my breathing is starting to get heavy, my lungs not used this kind of atmosphere, the smog not agreeing with my small lithe body. i look at the currently stunned Orge and his smaller Imp companions, thinking quickly Luka took advantage of the Orge's stunned state and slammed her hammer back down into it's (rather ugly) face. her attacks weren't particular hard, but they where fast and numerous. Your attacks prove effective, dispatching the horrific Ogre without too much trouble. However, his companions are more of a handful, and while you focus on the massive beast, they swipe at your back with their daggers! homestuckxplain rolls 28 homestuckxplain rolls 10 A hit! One of them draws blood on your exposed back, and the wound quickly festers with heat and itchiness., causing you to lose one health! MeringueLuka - 5/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip hard to divert the pain, i bit down so hard i almost break the skin. i spin on my heel brining my now fairly bloody hammer straight towards the closest Imps cranium, using the moment of my swing i spring myself to my feet and dive out of reach of the imps, cringing slightly as i land, my back searing in pain. Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #62 - (have to sleep will reply to this in the morning) [+] (12 new replies) | 06/18/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 5,390** i groan and sling my boy around my body, the changing weather here is far to volatile to rely on ranged weapons. i reach into my back pack and pull out a light hammer, i swing it around in my hand as i take of towards the giant Orge, with my moment i leap up onto the adjacent wall and run along it a few paces, using this height to attack the beasts face directly. i leap forward brining my hammer down towards his face, afterwards i roll forward behind him putting a bit of distance between us. #131 -
homestuckxplain (06/18/2015) [-] Your hammer is a light one, but a light hammer to the face is always deadly. Your blow connects into his teeth, shattering them and sending him reeling. As you land, he falls down besides you, a terrible howl of pain echoing around the cavern you are in. The two Imps reunite with each other, and press forward, waving their daggers at you. homestuckxplain rolls 30 homestuckxplain rolls 29 Fortunately though, they seem to be overcome with a strange transformation, fluffy hair erupting from head, arms and feet as their necks grow long and thick. Whether this is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen, but now is the time to strike! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - Stunned Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i land with a soft thud, my breathing is starting to get heavy, my lungs not used this kind of atmosphere, the smog not agreeing with my small lithe body. i look at the currently stunned Orge and his smaller Imp companions, thinking quickly Luka took advantage of the Orge's stunned state and slammed her hammer back down into it's (rather ugly) face. her attacks weren't particular hard, but they where fast and numerous. Your attacks prove effective, dispatching the horrific Ogre without too much trouble. However, his companions are more of a handful, and while you focus on the massive beast, they swipe at your back with their daggers! homestuckxplain rolls 28 homestuckxplain rolls 10 A hit! One of them draws blood on your exposed back, and the wound quickly festers with heat and itchiness., causing you to lose one health! MeringueLuka - 5/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip hard to divert the pain, i bit down so hard i almost break the skin. i spin on my heel brining my now fairly bloody hammer straight towards the closest Imps cranium, using the moment of my swing i spring myself to my feet and dive out of reach of the imps, cringing slightly as i land, my back searing in pain. Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #39 - yes i posted it. [+] (1 new reply) | 06/17/2015 on it's dat time again. | +5 |
| #21 - i love you <3 | 06/17/2015 on Most brutal E3 QUESTION OF... | +1 |
| #36 - **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rol… [+] (14 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| homestuckxplain rolls 491,527 The bow reacted strangely in your hands, the beads around your neck imbuing them with some power as the ogre and imp stood before you. It seemed that, despite their hideous appearance, these creatures counted as Humans enough to satisfy the conditions! Sadly, even with the enhanced shot, the arrow missed completely, torn away by the harsh wind before it could hit anything. The Imp and Ogres react in kind, attempting to follow you up the ledge. While the ogre makes it, he is too winded by even the small ledge to do anything once at the top. homestuckxplain rolls 078[spoiler] One of the Imps suffers an unfortunate fate as it fails to jump the ledge, slamming back into the ground and rolling out of the cave. [spoiler]*homestuckxplain rolls 06* The other Imp managed to climb with no difficulty, and begins waving his badge in your face again. This has a decidedly less dramatic effect than a standard attack, of course, and you escape unscathed.*homestuckxplain rolls 24* MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 5,390** i groan and sling my boy around my body, the changing weather here is far to volatile to rely on ranged weapons. i reach into my back pack and pull out a light hammer, i swing it around in my hand as i take of towards the giant Orge, with my moment i leap up onto the adjacent wall and run along it a few paces, using this height to attack the beasts face directly. i leap forward brining my hammer down towards his face, afterwards i roll forward behind him putting a bit of distance between us. #131 -
homestuckxplain (06/18/2015) [-] Your hammer is a light one, but a light hammer to the face is always deadly. Your blow connects into his teeth, shattering them and sending him reeling. As you land, he falls down besides you, a terrible howl of pain echoing around the cavern you are in. The two Imps reunite with each other, and press forward, waving their daggers at you. homestuckxplain rolls 30 homestuckxplain rolls 29 Fortunately though, they seem to be overcome with a strange transformation, fluffy hair erupting from head, arms and feet as their necks grow long and thick. Whether this is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen, but now is the time to strike! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - Stunned Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i land with a soft thud, my breathing is starting to get heavy, my lungs not used this kind of atmosphere, the smog not agreeing with my small lithe body. i look at the currently stunned Orge and his smaller Imp companions, thinking quickly Luka took advantage of the Orge's stunned state and slammed her hammer back down into it's (rather ugly) face. her attacks weren't particular hard, but they where fast and numerous. Your attacks prove effective, dispatching the horrific Ogre without too much trouble. However, his companions are more of a handful, and while you focus on the massive beast, they swipe at your back with their daggers! homestuckxplain rolls 28 homestuckxplain rolls 10 A hit! One of them draws blood on your exposed back, and the wound quickly festers with heat and itchiness., causing you to lose one health! MeringueLuka - 5/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip hard to divert the pain, i bit down so hard i almost break the skin. i spin on my heel brining my now fairly bloody hammer straight towards the closest Imps cranium, using the moment of my swing i spring myself to my feet and dive out of reach of the imps, cringing slightly as i land, my back searing in pain. Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #18 - wait x-com 2 was shown? where can i find a video of this? [+] (2 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on Most brutal E3 QUESTION OF... | 0 |
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| #13 - the funny thing is, he's the only one i know with an e in his … [+] (2 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on What do you get out of our... | +1 |
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| #11 - whelp we both ****** up with his name haha [+] (5 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on What do you get out of our... | +3 |
| #15 -
comicexplain (06/17/2015) [-]  She's a psychopath, there's no doubt about that. But that's because of Joker abusing her affections. the funny thing is, he's the only one i know with an e in his name, everyone else seems to omit it. | ||
| #2 - Comment deleted | 06/17/2015 on Thingymabobs | +7 |
| #17 - i groan as i stand. this lands climate is utterly baffling. … [+] (16 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| #34 -
homestuckxplain (06/17/2015) [-]  "This Land is called The Land of Smog and Steppes, and is inhabited by us, the Frog People. It is an ancient Land, with layers of history, but paradoxically did not even exist until you arrived!" He smiles, understanding your confusion. "This land is sick, and only the hero can heal it. To do so, you must confront a terrible beast. Once healed, you will realize your power as the True Hero, and be eligible to participate in the great War!" As if the thought of a war had attracted them, three figures dropped down from a rocky alcove above. The hideous creatures roared at the Frog people as they scattered to the wind, soon lost to the blinding flurry of snow and sand. Turning to you, the largest of the three creatures yells a furious war-cry. "PAPERS PLEASE! LICENSE AND REGISTRATION!" The swords and daggers they wield are eerily familiar, mimicking the weapon you sacrificed not minutes ago. As they draw closer, they take turns between waving said weapons and pointing at the badges the hold. Defend yourself! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A #36 -
meringueluka (06/17/2015) [-]  **meringueluka rolls 7,029** i groan as the monsters appear. great, fighting already. and my wounded arm has only just healed from the bout with the Orc's. i hope im not accidently attacking the good guys and not being played for a fool, but at this point i don't really have much of a choice. i draw my bow and notch your arrow. "stay back of i will fire!" i yell, i give them one chance, when they fail to obey i let lose a single arrow at the imp, before climbing up a small ledge to get an aerial view. homestuckxplain rolls 491,527 The bow reacted strangely in your hands, the beads around your neck imbuing them with some power as the ogre and imp stood before you. It seemed that, despite their hideous appearance, these creatures counted as Humans enough to satisfy the conditions! Sadly, even with the enhanced shot, the arrow missed completely, torn away by the harsh wind before it could hit anything. The Imp and Ogres react in kind, attempting to follow you up the ledge. While the ogre makes it, he is too winded by even the small ledge to do anything once at the top. homestuckxplain rolls 078[spoiler] One of the Imps suffers an unfortunate fate as it fails to jump the ledge, slamming back into the ground and rolling out of the cave. [spoiler]*homestuckxplain rolls 06* The other Imp managed to climb with no difficulty, and begins waving his badge in your face again. This has a decidedly less dramatic effect than a standard attack, of course, and you escape unscathed.*homestuckxplain rolls 24* MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 5,390** i groan and sling my boy around my body, the changing weather here is far to volatile to rely on ranged weapons. i reach into my back pack and pull out a light hammer, i swing it around in my hand as i take of towards the giant Orge, with my moment i leap up onto the adjacent wall and run along it a few paces, using this height to attack the beasts face directly. i leap forward brining my hammer down towards his face, afterwards i roll forward behind him putting a bit of distance between us. #131 -
homestuckxplain (06/18/2015) [-] Your hammer is a light one, but a light hammer to the face is always deadly. Your blow connects into his teeth, shattering them and sending him reeling. As you land, he falls down besides you, a terrible howl of pain echoing around the cavern you are in. The two Imps reunite with each other, and press forward, waving their daggers at you. homestuckxplain rolls 30 homestuckxplain rolls 29 Fortunately though, they seem to be overcome with a strange transformation, fluffy hair erupting from head, arms and feet as their necks grow long and thick. Whether this is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen, but now is the time to strike! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - Stunned Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i land with a soft thud, my breathing is starting to get heavy, my lungs not used this kind of atmosphere, the smog not agreeing with my small lithe body. i look at the currently stunned Orge and his smaller Imp companions, thinking quickly Luka took advantage of the Orge's stunned state and slammed her hammer back down into it's (rather ugly) face. her attacks weren't particular hard, but they where fast and numerous. Your attacks prove effective, dispatching the horrific Ogre without too much trouble. However, his companions are more of a handful, and while you focus on the massive beast, they swipe at your back with their daggers! homestuckxplain rolls 28 homestuckxplain rolls 10 A hit! One of them draws blood on your exposed back, and the wound quickly festers with heat and itchiness., causing you to lose one health! MeringueLuka - 5/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip hard to divert the pain, i bit down so hard i almost break the skin. i spin on my heel brining my now fairly bloody hammer straight towards the closest Imps cranium, using the moment of my swing i spring myself to my feet and dive out of reach of the imps, cringing slightly as i land, my back searing in pain. Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #9 - **meringueluka used "*roll items*"** **meringueluka rolls D… [+] (53 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on FJ Roll-Playing: A Brief... | 0 |
| #196 -
homestuckxplain (06/18/2015) [-]  Every now and then one of the piles might shift slightly, and it becomes clear that the ground is sloped downward. With nothing but rocky walls behind you, it is clear that this is the only way forward. Each step sends more of the snow or sand tumbling down the slope, until it falls over a ledge that you come to. Looking down, you see a massive cavern before you, several holes leading into it just like the one you are in. From each, sand and snow pour lightly, pooling in the middle where something lurks. Far below is a familiar figure. The Elder Frog Man seems to standing on a particularly large mound of sand/snow, holding a tadpole that shimmers in one hand, and a crystal that matches your hair colour perfectly. Before you can so much as blink, he is gone, an explosion of white and gold heralding the arrival of a mysterious creature. Massive in size, the giant snake is hideous beyond measure. Gulping the poor Elder and his treasures down, it turns to look at you, raising its head towards. You are very high up, but this creature is very large, and will likely be able to reach you. What do you do? >>#291 "You deem how you should fight!" Scylla screeches, hissing as you draw closer. "You decided that the moment you took on the mantle of the rogue! You are the most important thing in your life! Why can't you realize that!?" As you climb onto her tail, she begins shifting back and forth, trying to shake you off. Your elven agility serves you well however, and you can stay on with ease. You draw close to her wounded head, and raise your club over your head. homestuckxplain rolls 485 In the blink of an eye, Scylla has you in her mouth again, having finally managed to throw you off her. Vicious fangs dig into you once again as she shakes your tiny body, before throwing you across the cavern entirely. "Change is essential! Your Heart, your Soul, demands you adapt at every second! That is what makes your Heart worth so much more than all others! It can shift and change with the force of Destiny itself!" i cough as i sit up. my club now far out of my reach. "ugh, i fight, how i wish. i am me, and i fight how i please. i will not be bound by anyone or anything!" i stand up, blood softly trickling from a wound in my stomach. funnyjunk.com/user/meringueluka/492#492 i draw a shortbow out from my back, finally a weapon i like. i chuckle softly as i slink into the shadows, slowly and carefully making my way up the rocks to an vantage point from their i slowly circle over to where Syclla is, letting out a soft breath i notch an arrow and take aim for her wounded head, i use the caves multiple rocks and craves to make my voice bounce and echo making it hard to pin point. "you over estimate my souls worth, i am just a women with motive and drive. and didn't i tell you already. I don't believe in fate! " i shout standing up and losing my arrow. The Elves are well known for their skill with any bow, and as you draw a Shortbow from your pack, Scylla seems to smile with glee. As you disappear into the shadows, Scylla begins swinging her head back and forth, searching for you. Your first arrow pings into her side, neatly hitting one of her tiny weakpoints where she was wounded earlier. She howls in pain, turning to see where the arrow came from, but you are already gone. "You see!? How can you doubt my words! When you trust in destiny to provide for you, your attacks are powerful and worthy, but when you rely on another's weapon, even if it is your cherished Mothers, there is no real power there!" Another arrow, another screech of pain. Once again Scylla twists and turns, looking for you. Your words, along with your arrows, are making her angry. "How dare you say you do not stand above us all! You, who fight me, a Demi-God, on equal footing, who has taken wounds that would slay others of your kind easily!" it's true. You have been bitten twice by the great serpent already, and by all rights should be cut in half long ago. Sorry, I forgot to post your health last time, showing you lost 1HP from the last bite attack. MeringueLuka - 4/6 - N/A Scylla - 3 wounds - N/A "A demi god!" i laugh bitterly as i move again, not staying in one place in hopes of not getting hit again. "A demi god would intent on slaying me would use all their force to slay me in a single blow! yet you held back, you could have swallowed me yet spat back out your actions are the reasons i am alive, not some pre determined CRAP!." i nock another arrow as move out of cover and lose it, this time aiming for her eyes. "I carve out my own future, and i will not be controlled by you, fate or my mother!" the last part was not intend but i got caught up in the moment. "I would never kill you!" Scylla screeches, her jaw seeming to unhinge with the last word. Before you can shoot any more arrows, from deep inside her maw, a pale pink glow builds in intensity. Suddenly a heart-shaped beam of light blasts into the wall, emanating from her mouth. homestuckxplain rolls 210 While it wasn't anywhere close to hitting you, it did shake the walls intensely, bringing many rocks crashing down onto the cavern floor. There, they seemed to almost evaporate, turning into the fine sand/snow that litters the place. Having lost many of your hiding places, you will be force to return to the cavern floor. "I want to BE you!" Scylla roars, snaking her way around you. "For all my power, I am alone here, and your destiny will take you to so many new places! So many new faces to meet, and things to live for! Why let anything hold you back?! Realize how important you are, and slay me so you can be on your way!!!" MeringueLuka - 4/6 - N/A Scylla - 3 wounds - N/A i hid back behind the rock as the landscape is deviated. 'a heart beam. are you fucking serious?' i think to myself, although i can't deny how effective it was. sliding down the rocks i land with a soft *puff* i run along the surface, my shortbow ready to be used as the arrow is already nocked. as i see her move around me, i suddenly realize the truth. "i think i see it now. earlier you said you pitty me, but that was a lie. your jealous aren't you. for all your strength and power you let yourself be chained by 'fate' " i spit the last word like it's venom "then let me break your chains!" i yell as i drop to my left knee and lose an arrow straight towards Scylla's wounded flesh. True as your words may or may not be, an unfortunate thing happens! As with any rogue weapon, repeated use damages the fragile item, and before you can shoot any more arrows, your precious Shortbow snaps clean in two! "I do Pity you!" She screeches as she draws closer, jaws clicking back into place. "Your Duty is to help others realise their potential for greatness, God-Shattering, World-Changing greatness, and every step of the way you be besides them, as great as they are! FATE HAS CHAINED ME, BUT IT WILL SET YOU FREE!!!!" *homestuckxplain rolls 250 She lunges forward, once again sinking fangs into your side. She picks you up in her mouth and begins shaking vigorously. MeringueLuka - 3/6 - Bitten and shaken by Scylla. Scylla - 3 wounds - N/A i curse my bad luck, of course it would break when i needed it most. i yell out in pain as she grabs me and lifts me high into the sky. i have given up on trying to talk and now foucous solely on fighting, www.funnyjunk.com/user/meringueluka/493#493 drawing a greatclub from my pack i find i might have a good chance, Sycall has me within reach of the tooth i hit eailer , biting on my lower lip to help focus and ignore pain i smash the tooth as hard as i physically can The Great Club is a massive, terrible weapon, able to deal crushing blows rivaled only by Warhammers. With each swing of the weapon, you drive the rotten tooth deeper into the gum, fetid blood cascading down over you as your rail against the beast. In a shock of blinding white pain for the serpent, Scylla drops you onto the soft ground below. Being both massive and able to move very quickly despite her size, she easily escapes your reach, snaking her way over to the other side of the Cavern. "Youf caw-" She pauses, and then spits out 2 of her massive teeth, obviously the ones you knocked loose. "You can end it now, Sylph of Heart." She says, looking at your Greatclub. "You have already learned so much, but I wonder if the final lesson will take hold. Come, we clash again!" She lunged forward, mouth agape again to bite you once more! MeringueLuka - 3/6 - N/A Scylla - 4 wounds - N/A when i hit the ground half the air in my lungs escape and i roll over in pain. slowly though, i manage t stand whit help from the great club "and you've learned so little." i groan. just before she charges i throw the club to the side, my right hand gripping my wound. steeling my self i leap just out of her way, rolling towards my weapon. garbing it as i roll forward i use my moment to swing around and smash it into her face, more than a few splinters shattering of as the two make contact. You're more than correct in saying that a few splinters fly off the weapon as it hits her face, because in fact, the weapon shatters entirely. A crackle of Pink energy, the same Scylla has released earlier, sparks around the useless weapon, and you realize that she has been the reason your weapons break so quickly. *homestuckxplain rolls 229* Being so close to her head, Scylla manages to slam into you, but with some deft dodging you can escape her wicked bite. As she rears back, she rises to her full height, towering over you. "When I am dead, remember these words." She growls down at you. "Being what you are meant to be is never easy. Helping others be what they must is even more difficult." She lowers her head again, foul blood pouring from her mouth. "Prepare yourself." i run backwards, diving behind a dune of sand, or snow. whatever. "if what they are meant to be, is not what they wish to be than i will not!" i yell out "it is a choice, and i shall not force anyone who is unwilling to act!" www.funnyjunk.com/user/meringueluka/496#496 i reach into my back pack and pull out a, a sling, a fucking sling. in a time like this i need a proper weapon not a fucking sling. but i have what i have. i reach down, taking hold of a few rock pieces from the rocks on the walls, i spin the sling and leap out from the dune and let the rock fly before hiding quickly behind another dune, my blood staining the sand slightly #311 -
homestuckxplain (06/22/2015) [-]  Slowly, haltingly, the Great Serpent falls. An explosion of sand and snow billowing up in it's wake. Her last breath exhales a cloud of brilliant pink energy, swirling up and out into the cavern air. It seems to swirl momentarily, before rushing to you, passing through your chest and then back up into the air, exiting through one of the cavern holes. A pulsing mark glows on your chest, before fading into nothing, and you feel a strange new power overtake you... Congrats on defeating the Denizen! Will be adding your Blessing to the list asap. Feel free to join the fight! "a snake? a giant, fucking snake?" i groan half in annoyance and half disbelieve. i stop my movement and look at the creature, nocking an arrow onto my bow i call out to the creature. i get ready to move, but i try to be diplomatic first. "Creature, my name is MeringueLuka. i wish you no harm, so please may we talk!?" i yell not holding up much hope. #301 -
homestuckxplain Comment deleted by meringueluka "Oh, I know you dear." The snake hisses, it's voice surprisingly pleasant, almost sultry. "The bright little Sylph who can't fix a damn thing." Now level with you, the full sight of the beast is available. It is wrinkled and worm-like, despite it's size, and its skin is almost see through. Black and yellow teeth seem to hang loosely from swollen gums, and a fetid odour washed over you as it breathes out a question. "Tell me I'm beautiful, my dear." The snake orders in that wonderful voice it has, then gives a light chuckle. "Tell me who is more beautiful, you or I?" i sling my bow back across my back, "ah, finally someone with the brain to talk." i say half joking. as i listen to it talk i cross my arms and think. "Hmm. i do not believe we could compare our beauty. your are marvellous and incredible in infinity different ways from me. where my beauty comes from my small lithe form, yours is in your amazing grace and the power you command." i think for a moment and speak up again. i lean back and smile softly. "but yes, you are beautiful in a primordial terrifying sense. the power you command is beyond anything i've seen before and that. that is beautiful." i smile softly, my words all completely true. The beast nods, ever so gently, and turns away from you slightly. "Yes, yes... good. It is good to know that even now you lie so well." The Denizen trills, slinking back down to the ground. "Your heart yearns for love, for affection, not from others as you believe, but from yourself. Look at how you cover your ears, worry at your hair, doubt yourself in everything you do. I would hate you, I should hate you for what your destiny says you must do to me, but I cannot hate you more than I pity you." The snake curls up in the soft sand and snow, seemingly ready to sleep. "Go elsewhere, girl, and pity yourself where I cannot see you. I will not take compliments from a liar such as you." i let out a sigh, it's words dig deep into me. every word is true. "i." i try to speak but i have nothing. i sit down and bring my knees up to my face, holding them close. "you are right, i do yearn for self acceptance, but i can never find it, and i do hide my true self." i look up at you, my smile gone replaced with a serious expression. "but don't we all?" I ask walking over to the snake creature, i place a single palm on it's head. "when i was young, people picked on my due to my ears and hair, i hatted them, i hatted myself. i wanted to fit in, to be normal more than anything in the world" a few tears start to form on in my eyes as i speak. i sit down brushing my tears away and look you in the eye a soft smile on my lips. "but, i think im slowly coming around, im making true friends, those who make me feel good, and accept me for who i am." i reach up and put my hair around my ears, not showing them of, but letting anyone who cared look see them. "and i didn't lie i do find you beautiful" i laugh softly. "Oh deary me. Poor little soul." The Denizen sighs, shifting under your palm. It's eyes languish on your ears and hair almost wistfully, and its plain to see that it wants them badly. "I am the Denizen of the Heart, as you are a Hero of the Heart, so believe me when I tell you I know a thing or two about souls." The Denizen meets your eyes, and then looks upward, to the rocky ceiling that is the floor of the world above. "So many people don't realize that beauty is the most important thing in the Universe. Without beauty, without appreciation of values, life is a purposeless cycle of death and birth. Beauty is not from looks either, that is so shallow to think so. Beauty comes from a soul, and your soul can be so bright, little one." Raising its head, the Denizen gestures to one of the holes in the cavern, where even now a stream of powdered snow and silken sand flows. "I stole the finest materials of this land for my nest, looking to deprive others so that they would realize a life without beauty is meaningless. I hope my lesson was learned, for I think now is the time to undo my work." Turning to you, the Denizen of Heart meets your eyes. "Here is my choice, little soul. You must master this land, and there are two ways to do so. One is to serve me, and the other, to best me in combat. Which shall it be?" i look up following the Denizen's eyes. the stone ceiling is mile and miles above, yet it feels so close, like a warm embrace. "beautify is in the world, the wind, the stroke of a brush or the clash of steel. all of it is beautiful" i look to the creature, running my hand along it's head. "in their own special way, but you cannot force people to see it, they must bee shown, and they must be willing, otherwise that beauty is sour, joyless. it's a spoilt meal." my voice is harsher, almost lecturing in my tone. i bite my lower lips thinking about what must be done. "tell me, and be truthful, in killing you. would more, or less lives be condemned?" (updating from phone, please excuse errors.) The Denizen shakes its head slightly, disagreeing with your words. "The world holds no beauty, unless we give it that what it can hold. When a tree falls alone in the woods, does it make a noise? Does the flower that blooms in the center of the desert, away from all life, have beauty? Unless a soul is there to shine light on it, the beauty may as well not exist." Your question brings a smile to its lips, curling them back to reveal rotten teeth as it chuckled lightly. "My death would mean everything, and I would slaughter a thousand tribes of frog-men to ensure I die at your hands. My soul far outshines theirs, as yours outshines mine. Let the Aspect of Life quibble over the value of the individual, Heart knows that some souls, the true value, outweigh others. Do not concern yourself with the Frog-Men. My death will not affect them, nor will you sparing my life. They exist to bring you to me, and nothing more." The Denizen reared up, reumy eyes meeting your. "I have within me the power of Heart, a power I can pass onto you. With it, your soul will be fortified, a gift you must bring to others. In the coming war, you must embody Heart, or our deal shall be void. Otherwise, you may slay me, as some of your allies have done, and claim your power by force. Then you would have no such obligations in the coming battle. Which shall you choose?" listing to the creatures word my mind slowly is made. i shake my head and walk away, putting a bit of distance between use. "your blatant disraged of sentient life is not something i can allow." i sling my bow of my back and nose an arrow. "tell me Denizen, what is your name?" i ask taking aim. preapering for a fight. The sight of your bow grins a leery grin to the Denizens face, and it pulls back to rear up to it's full height. "Good, good! I am Scylla, Denizen of Heart, and you shall slay me to fulfill your destiny!" In a blur, Scylla is upon you, a brilliant blossom of pain sprouting in your sides as you find yourself flung bodily into the air. You spin uncontrollably, arcing up almost to the roof of the cavern before you start to come back down, and by this time you may have realized that Scylla has scored a very nasty bite in your side. *homestuckxplain rolls 319 Below you, the snake-beast has her maw open, ready to catch and swallow you whole. www.funnyjunk.com/user/meringueluka/481#481 i grit my teeth, ignoring the pain for now. much bigger things have my immediate concern. but in throwing me into the air Scylla has given me a the first advantage, although i would much prefer if i was on stable ground but i'll take what i can get, and the second one is in opining her mouth, she's given me a clear shot into the more vital organs of her hear. i let out a single breath before i let my arrow lose. no sooner as it been loosed then i grab another, with a bit of effort i try and change my trajectory so I'll fall just besides the creauter, and using my new arrow, i attempt to dig into the monsters skin. Your arrow clanged off one of the Denizens fangs, falling uselessly to the side, but it did manage to make her twitch. With her no longer directly under you, you could stab directly into the Denizens side. Surprisingly, even though scale-less and with skin so thin you could see muscles and bone beneath it, it is nearly impossible to get the arrow any deeper than an inch. Hanging on for dear life, you find yourself just out of reach of Scylla's fangs, try as she might to turn and bite you. With a rush of wind, you find her swinging her head towards the cave wall. She is going to crush you flat! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - Perched on side of Denizen's head. Unable to use bow. Scylla - 1 wound - N/A my breath hitches and i grunt as i finally come to a stop."why are you never useful when i need you!" i mutter to my bow, breathing heavily i notice her plan. 'oh shit.' i think to myself. without thinking much i swing myself forward letting go of my first arrow and pulling 2 more out. as i swing to the underside of her body, i drop my bow in favour of just surviving right now, i stick both arrows in roughly, using more force this time in an attempt to help break the skin. Scylla is a massive beast, and her throes send waves of sand and snow arcing everywhere. Your attempt to dodge the squishing attack was successful, but you would soon come to realize that Scyllas skin was simply too tough! Your arrows fail to take hold, and you fall the long drop from her chin to the floor. Luckily, the snowpile below you is soft! Scylla is still thrashing about, and your bow is not that far from you! Will you attempt another shot, or allow luck to decide on a random weapon for you? MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Scylla - 1 wound - N/A funnyjunk.com/user/meringueluka/489#489 i land with a thud, although i am very grateful the snowpile softened what should have been a spine breaking fall. but my head still spins slightly as i stand up, i reach into my back pack and pull out a dart. i value my bow but i need something else in this situation. i run of towards a large rock formation and use that as cover as i take aim, slowing my heart beat i take aim and throw my dart with all my strength to wards Scylla. The Dart arcs up and out, but Scylla is simply too massive for it to have any effect. However, the appearance of this weapon seems to please the Denizen for some mysterious reason, and it doesn't press an attack just yet. "You stopped playing with that silly bow! Now you can fight as you are meant to, as the Heart demands you to! Fight me with all of you!" homestuckxplain rolls 156 Suddenly she has lunged forward again, the rock you are hiding behind shattering as she plucks it from the ground. Tossing her head, the massive boulder is thrown aside as if it was a pebble. "Run! Sneak and hide, and think your way out of this! Do as you were meant to do!" MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Scylla - 1 wound - N/A i growl below my breath as my dart makes no impact. what will it take to kill this fucking creature? part of my mind is regretting not taking it's dam deal, would be so much easier. curse my own morals. as Scylla picks up the rock i make a move, i slip into a large snowpile, hiding my body completely from view "I HAPPEN TO LIKE MY BOW!" i yell out, throwing my voice to the left not enough to totally confuse her, but enough to throw her of. 'it was my mothers' i mutter to myself under my breath. i reach back into my pull out a club, not a weapon i would have chosen, but beggars can't be choosers. slowing my breath i study the field and what i know of my opponent. i bite my lower lip watching Scylla search for me, but then, suddenly an idea comes into my mind. i am tiny and my strikes would most likely not break her skin, but i can make her hurt herself. i scan the area for something, anything. and then, i find it a perfectly spiked rock that could do some serious damage it smashed into a speed. steeling my mind i make a move, my club in hand. "OY! OVER HERE!" I yell i watch as Scylla charges at me, just before she arrives i dive to the side, although my club wont do much to her, i still slam it into the side of her face, realistic not doing much. Scylla looks like a giant snake, but the way she searches for you is more like a dog, taking big, wet sniffs as her snout hovers an inch above the land. Your attempt at throwing your voice is successful, not in that it distracts her, but instead gets her talking. "What you like and what you are are totally different things! You are a Rogue! Fight like one! Be who you are! Help others be who they are! That is your Destiny!" Reacting to your shout, she swings her head around, but your reflexes are too fast. As you leap aside, slamming into her face with your sturdy club, Scylla is sent reeling, smashed into the rock just as you had planned. Unfortunately, her tough skin prevents her from being impaled, but it still manages to leave a nasty mark down the side of her face. Screeching in pain, Scylla coils herself up, retreating to the other side of the cavern. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Scylla - 2 wounds - N/A i pant heavily, debray and rock shards fall of my body as i stand up. my grip on the club tightens. "And who deems how i should fight?!" i shout out ruining over to my bow. "i fight on my terms, with the weapon of MY choice! that is what a rouge is!" i yell slinging my bow over my shoulder and chasing after Scylla. "i chose how and where i fight. what i like is what determs who i am!" i yell out, with a growl in my voice, my own past adding weight to my word. Scylla is huge, but in this intense it works for my advantage as im able to quickly catch up. being at the ass end of the creature i leap up and climb atop her body, i run across her top. i leap from one part to another, using this method i quickly get up to her face "I DECIDE MY FATE!" i yell slamming my Club onto her skull "I ALONE STEER MY SHIP!" #14 -
homestuckxplain (06/17/2015) [-]  When you recover from unconsciousness, you find yourself face down in sand and covered in a light layer of snow. The air howls around you, at one moment blistering hot and dry, the other cold and wet. In the distance, peaks of reddish rock poke out from under layers of frost. A great cheer rings out behind you, and you turn to see a group of Frog Men, bundled up against the cold and fanning themselves when it gets hot. They crowd around you, hopping with glee and making remarks about your cute pink hair and strange pointy ears. "A stranger!" One cheers. "A hero?" Another questions. "Too strange!" The first says gleefully. A bearded frogman parts the crowd, and bows. "We have waited for you, Hero! This land weeps in your absence, and the Denizen is unchecked! Far above, the War rages and our God slumbers on." How mysterious! Would you like to ask for some clarification? You can ask the village Chief one question! 1. Ask about the heroes. 2. Ask about the land. 3. Ask about the Denizen. 4. Ask about the War. 5. Ask about their God. 6. Ask about something else. i groan as i stand. this lands climate is utterly baffling. i groan as the men huddle around me, my ears have always been something i've been slightly self concious about them, i brush my hair over my ears covering them. i listen to him talk, taking in as much detail and information as i can, especially since this land is all knew to me. i moan softly and think "elder, tell me of this Land" i ask thinking it's best i know where i am and where i could go to seek help and more detailed information. #34 -
homestuckxplain (06/17/2015) [-] "This Land is called The Land of Smog and Steppes, and is inhabited by us, the Frog People. It is an ancient Land, with layers of history, but paradoxically did not even exist until you arrived!" He smiles, understanding your confusion. "This land is sick, and only the hero can heal it. To do so, you must confront a terrible beast. Once healed, you will realize your power as the True Hero, and be eligible to participate in the great War!" As if the thought of a war had attracted them, three figures dropped down from a rocky alcove above. The hideous creatures roared at the Frog people as they scattered to the wind, soon lost to the blinding flurry of snow and sand. Turning to you, the largest of the three creatures yells a furious war-cry. "PAPERS PLEASE! LICENSE AND REGISTRATION!" The swords and daggers they wield are eerily familiar, mimicking the weapon you sacrificed not minutes ago. As they draw closer, they take turns between waving said weapons and pointing at the badges the hold. Defend yourself! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A #36 -
meringueluka (06/17/2015) [-] **meringueluka rolls 7,029** i groan as the monsters appear. great, fighting already. and my wounded arm has only just healed from the bout with the Orc's. i hope im not accidently attacking the good guys and not being played for a fool, but at this point i don't really have much of a choice. i draw my bow and notch your arrow. "stay back of i will fire!" i yell, i give them one chance, when they fail to obey i let lose a single arrow at the imp, before climbing up a small ledge to get an aerial view. homestuckxplain rolls 491,527 The bow reacted strangely in your hands, the beads around your neck imbuing them with some power as the ogre and imp stood before you. It seemed that, despite their hideous appearance, these creatures counted as Humans enough to satisfy the conditions! Sadly, even with the enhanced shot, the arrow missed completely, torn away by the harsh wind before it could hit anything. The Imp and Ogres react in kind, attempting to follow you up the ledge. While the ogre makes it, he is too winded by even the small ledge to do anything once at the top. homestuckxplain rolls 078[spoiler] One of the Imps suffers an unfortunate fate as it fails to jump the ledge, slamming back into the ground and rolling out of the cave. [spoiler]*homestuckxplain rolls 06* The other Imp managed to climb with no difficulty, and begins waving his badge in your face again. This has a decidedly less dramatic effect than a standard attack, of course, and you escape unscathed.*homestuckxplain rolls 24* MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 5,390** i groan and sling my boy around my body, the changing weather here is far to volatile to rely on ranged weapons. i reach into my back pack and pull out a light hammer, i swing it around in my hand as i take of towards the giant Orge, with my moment i leap up onto the adjacent wall and run along it a few paces, using this height to attack the beasts face directly. i leap forward brining my hammer down towards his face, afterwards i roll forward behind him putting a bit of distance between us. #131 -
homestuckxplain (06/18/2015) [-] Your hammer is a light one, but a light hammer to the face is always deadly. Your blow connects into his teeth, shattering them and sending him reeling. As you land, he falls down besides you, a terrible howl of pain echoing around the cavern you are in. The two Imps reunite with each other, and press forward, waving their daggers at you. homestuckxplain rolls 30 homestuckxplain rolls 29 Fortunately though, they seem to be overcome with a strange transformation, fluffy hair erupting from head, arms and feet as their necks grow long and thick. Whether this is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen, but now is the time to strike! MeringueLuka - 6/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre - 0 wounds - Stunned Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i land with a soft thud, my breathing is starting to get heavy, my lungs not used this kind of atmosphere, the smog not agreeing with my small lithe body. i look at the currently stunned Orge and his smaller Imp companions, thinking quickly Luka took advantage of the Orge's stunned state and slammed her hammer back down into it's (rather ugly) face. her attacks weren't particular hard, but they where fast and numerous. Your attacks prove effective, dispatching the horrific Ogre without too much trouble. However, his companions are more of a handful, and while you focus on the massive beast, they swipe at your back with their daggers! homestuckxplain rolls 28 homestuckxplain rolls 10 A hit! One of them draws blood on your exposed back, and the wound quickly festers with heat and itchiness., causing you to lose one health! MeringueLuka - 5/7 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A i grimace as i feel the blade slice at my back. i bite my lip hard to divert the pain, i bit down so hard i almost break the skin. i spin on my heel brining my now fairly bloody hammer straight towards the closest Imps cranium, using the moment of my swing i spring myself to my feet and dive out of reach of the imps, cringing slightly as i land, my back searing in pain. Your hammer proves ineffective, and in fact seems to have taken too much damage when used to dispatch the Ogre. After the first hit, the head flies off the handle completely. Undamaged and unfazed, the Imps press their attack, chasing you down as you spring away. homestuckxplain rolls 42 homestuckxplain rolls 15 Once again, the Imps prove to be dangerous foes, or at least one of them does. The other seems to be a bit of an idiot, spending more time pointing at his badge than attacking you. The competant one manages to stick you with his dagger again, causing you to lose one of your precious MP this time! MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 3,200** i look down at my hammer "fucking perfect" i spit sarcastically as i throw it to the ground. as i run i feel the wind finally die down again, taking my chance i fling my bow back into my hand and notch and arrow. i spin on my heal and drop to my knee, letting out a single long breath i lose the arrow to the Imp that was actually attacking me, i aim for his rib cage and lungs. The arrow flies true, and the competent Imp is skewered with a well-placed shot. His ditz of a companion seems confused and fearful, but charges you nevertheless. However, your longer legs and elven stamina mean you have outpaced him handily, and you have another opportunity of attack. MeringueLuka - 5/6 - N/A Crude Flesh Ogre -SLAIN Vile Imp - SLAIN Vile Imp - 0 wounds - N/A **meringueluka used "*roll 1, 0-9999*"** **meringueluka rolls 8,711** i suck on the tip of my right thumb and hold in the air. the strength of the current air flows chills my finger slightly, but more importantly tells me if a new strong wave of air is about to come. feeling nothing i take my chance. i notch my finally last arrow and jump atop a small rock, getting a hight advantage on the imp (well more so than just our biological heights) and take aim. loosing the arrow i jump backwards of the rock, and use it as an obstacle between me, and the final imp. Another unerring shot! The arrow flies true once more, undisturbed by wind, sand or snow, and impales the comically inefficient Imp where he stands. As his life escaped him, he tries in vain to stab you from so far away, his thrown dagger falling far too short. The ground rumbles beneath your feet, and you feel your body overtaken once again by the books green light. Where is it taking you now?! Give me a minute to type another post, and congrats on defeating the monsters! | ||
| #8 - this is one of the reason i hate the joker so much. (you know … [+] (8 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on What do you get out of our... | +3 |
| #15 -
comicexplain (06/17/2015) [-] She's a psychopath, there's no doubt about that. But that's because of Joker abusing her affections. the funny thing is, he's the only one i know with an e in his name, everyone else seems to omit it. | ||
| #10 - oh great, what kinda of edgy gore **** are we gonna get… [+] (20 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on Shadman | +91 |
 he really that bad? because I've seen plenty of japanese guro and let me tell you.... #227 -
hourlyb (06/18/2015) [-] Everything he does has to end up in bestiality or gore or incest or some kinda weird shit. Because, why not? He is the equivalent of the edgy 8th grader that carves pentagrams in his desk just to be "different". And his shit always looks grimy as fuck.  Currently he's drawing loli stuff from The Incredibles and loli futa stuff from Coraline, so we're covered on the edge for now I mean... maybe not though. Also, it's a loli AND a futa, I just misspoke | ||
| #9 - Comment deleted | 06/17/2015 on MRW people wait for fallout... | 0 |
| #7 - Comment deleted [+] (2 new replies) | 06/17/2015 on MRW people wait for fallout... | 0 |
| #8 -
ogopogofod Comment deleted by meringueluka #9 -
meringueluka Comment deleted by meringueluka | ||
Latest users (1): meringueluka, anonymous(1).
Anonymous comments allowed.
27 comments displayed.
#859
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dndxplain ONLINE (20 hours ago) [-] this new champion coming out took out Zed, Garen, Sona, and what was the last one?
#861 to #860
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dndxplain ONLINE (20 hours ago) [-] I've found a few possible connections.
when you think a role, you think that champion.
Tank - garen essentially resets like baron if you build him correctly
Fighter - exploding powerfisting
Assassin - dude has a smite as his ult, basically
Support/mage - do I even have to explain this.
there's no ADC.
I think it's this new champ waving his dick about metaphorically.
when you think a role, you think that champion.
Tank - garen essentially resets like baron if you build him correctly
Fighter - exploding powerfisting
Assassin - dude has a smite as his ult, basically
Support/mage - do I even have to explain this.
there's no ADC.
I think it's this new champ waving his dick about metaphorically.
#862 to #861
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meringueluka ONLINE (20 hours ago) [-] huh that could be true. and it was a while since we got an ADC if i remember correctly.
#856
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thenobodyorigin ONLINE (01/10/2016) [-] Hey good to see you back on funnyjunk.
How is it going?
How is it going?
#857 to #856
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meringueluka ONLINE (01/10/2016) [-] generally rather good, work is not benign to difficult. but i fear my client is slowly turning into a perfectionist .
#858 to #857
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thenobodyorigin ONLINE (01/11/2016) [-] Well good to hear you are doing rather good. Having clients that want everything perfect are always a drag to work with. I know about it i work in the IT.
And how is your wife doing?
And how is your wife doing?
#840
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elsanna (11/30/2015) [-] You're gonna kick cancer's ass and back here 'miring **** with the best of us. Take care.
#839
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mooncakes (11/30/2015) [-] i just saw your post too, im awful sorry you have it. but i sure hope you can bring the laptop or a phone with you so we can keep making you laugh! <3 but um as they say in the old land, you take that bitch and shove it into the mo ******* ground you hear me? aight, aight. but foreal though, i hope you get better and FEEL better. thats the most important thing. hang in there girl. i mean, let me know when you come back okay?
#838
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matexius ONLINE (11/30/2015) [-] I saw your post, just wanted to say...
Good luck with your treatment and all, I hope you make it through...
We all believe in you!
Good luck with your treatment and all, I hope you make it through...
We all believe in you!
#837
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fffffffuuuuuuuuuuu (11/30/2015) [-] I hope your treatment goes well and with that I wish you all the luck of the world
#836
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fuuuuuuuck (11/30/2015) [-]
Hey, just saw your post hope your treatment goes well and a speedy recovery
#833
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alfonshister ONLINE (11/29/2015) [-] there's no way your profile page can be that empty
let me take some space
let me take some space
#841 to #833
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meringueluka ONLINE (12/05/2015) [-] ha, i tend to every now and again delete all the comments, it gets to clustered otherwise
