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mattass    

Rank #49198 on Subscribers
no avatar Level 224 Comments: Mind Blower
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Date Signed Up:6/01/2013
Last Login:12/04/2013
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Thumbs: 2538 total,  2997 ,  459
Comment Thumbs: 2446 total,  3007 ,  561
Content Level Progress: 38% (38/100)
Level 125 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry → Level 126 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry
Comment Level Progress: 43% (43/100)
Level 224 Comments: Mind Blower → Level 225 Comments: Mind Blower
Subscribers:1
Content Views:246734
Times Content Favorited:221 times
Total Comments Made:505
FJ Points:4997

latest user's comments

#6 - Picture 08/21/2013 on when i googled guinea pig... 0
#4 - Comment deleted 08/21/2013 on Daryl in the comic +4
#187 - Picture 08/21/2013 on Don't fuck with 'merica +5
#2 - not even a fucking like  [+] (2 new replies) 08/21/2013 on when i googled guinea pig... +2
User avatar #3 - married (08/21/2013) [-]
Der ya go don't spend it all in one place
#6 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
#212 - its not fan made its from volume one of dark knight in the new…  [+] (1 new reply) 08/21/2013 on Batmath... The hero... +3
#216 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
fan made refering to the Superman Wins part.
#206 - and ill leave this here  [+] (3 new replies) 08/21/2013 on Batmath... The hero... +1
#208 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
Yours fan made and taken from an arc were superman wasn't fully in control. Mine taken from a series written by Frank Miller where an elderly Bruce Wayne Beats the shit out of Superman.
#212 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
its not fan made its from volume one of dark knight in the new 52 universe ( i know cuz i actually read)

lets be honest here bruce and clark are too good of freinds to fight in most universes as a matter of fact one of the only times batman cried is when he found out superman had died
#216 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
fan made refering to the Superman Wins part.
#203 - tor quantum vo is physical enhancing his fighting and reflexes… 08/21/2013 on Batmath... The hero... +1
#202 - and he only found out his true heritage after his adoptive par… 08/21/2013 on Batmath... The hero... 0
#105 - but not a firearm 08/21/2013 on Thumbs up 0
#87 - grappling "hook"  [+] (2 new replies) 08/21/2013 on Thumbs up 0
#89 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Hook fired from a gun
#105 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
but not a firearm
#161 - Picture 08/20/2013 on Batmath... The hero... +1
#41 - well... 08/20/2013 on Sip every last drop +1
#156 - the real question is... is batman superman... superman lost bo…  [+] (27 new replies) 08/20/2013 on Batmath... The hero... +4
#193 - beut (08/21/2013) [-]
Batman's parents were killed in front of him, Kent didn't know that his were dead untill he was 15 or so.
User avatar #221 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Yes but he also found out HIS ENTIRE RACE AND PLANET WERE DESTROYED and he was a dying breed, an alien on his home planet. An outcast. But, like Bruce he decided to become a symbol for good and justice.
#293 - beut (08/21/2013) [-]
Still it was kind of easier for him since he was basically a god
#202 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
and he only found out his true heritage after his adoptive parents died
User avatar #186 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
I fucking love you man.
User avatar #159 - lolwtfbbqryan (08/20/2013) [-]
Batman would still whoop superman's ass.
User avatar #185 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
You're stupidity and blatant fanboy-ism is killing us all, Batman is awesome but nowhere near on the same level as Superman. and before you say ANYTHING about fucking kryptonite, Superman has become immune to kryptonite in many story arcs. Superman could kill Batman, easily, but he won't. He values his friendships far more than Batman ever has.
#204 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
I'll just leave this here....
User avatar #272 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Not cannon..
User avatar #235 - bowties (08/21/2013) [-]
>Superman going easy on him because he understands what Bruce is doing is right, and only fights him because The Gipper forced him to
>Bruce had 10 years to plan for this
>Still needed Green Arrow's help
User avatar #207 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Yeah but that was one arc and Batman had a heart attack doing it. He BARELY beat Superman and had to have Ollie's help to do it. and Superman was NOWHERE near max strength. He had eaten a nuke, and had not been exposed to the sun for days.
#213 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
The heart attack was self induced by Bruce Wayne. And all of that was part of his plan. Noone argues the fact that under regular circumstances Superman kills Batman. Superman is a god compared to humans. However, with all of this in place and perfect planning, timing and ingenuity, Batman, a human, beat Superman. That's much more impressive to me than a god beating up humans.
User avatar #217 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
True, but Superman also held back A LOT because he was genuinely fearful of hurting Bruce, one of his best friends and a man he cared for deeply. Had Superman just let loose and punched Bruce with even his weakened state he could have killed him instantly and Batman knew this. He knew this could all go completely wrong and his entire plan hinged on Superman's mercy and Ollie's well timed shot. Don't get me wrong I quite enjoyed the whole scene and movie because Batman is one of my all time favorite heroes, I just wish that the ultra fanboys would quit it with this "Batman just automatically wins because he's Batman" bullshit.
#220 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
No Batman won by careful timing and planning. It's a long shot but he was able to do it. I've never liked Superman because he's basically a god. There is no danger for him and for me he's not a hero at all. Batman is a regular person without super powers. He beat god. That is an achievement. No matter what it too to do it, he still did. He made god bleed. That's more than enough for me. Because of that, Batman wins for me. I think he's a better all round character. And based on abilities alone, not many characters can stand up to Superman. But with his resources the human Bruce Wayne beat Superman. It doesn't get much more badass than that.
User avatar #231 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
To me Superman and Batman stand on equal ground AS HEROES. Because neither will ever give up, no matter how bad the threat is and no matter the potential result. Both would gladly die in the name of justice if it saved another. But in terms of ability, Superman wins. Sure he has the incredibly unfair advantage of being SUPERMAN but he is the one who saves the world every time it needs saving. Bruce just isn't on that level, not to say he hasn't defeated enemies far above his level and done incredible things for a human but he does have one thing most others don't; money. Lots and lots of it. He also is smart as hell and very well trained so he's not just an average human.
User avatar #229 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Then you've never actually looked at Superman through unbiased eyes. He is almost a god, but there is real danger out there for him. The villains he faces in some cases ARE ACTUAL GODS and others far above him. Doomsday, Darkseid, Brainiac, Zod, among others. All of which where at, or above his level. His character is really well put together and I find him to be one of the best superheroes around. I used to think EXACTLY like you dude, until I actually did my research and understood all of his character. I'm not saying it wasn't impressive, he did make a god bleed, but Bruce himself said he didn't know if it would work or not and the chances were low. And imagine had the events leading up to it had not weakened Superman? How would Bruce have beaten him then? I'm just saying his victory was both the result of his incredible planning and a few dashes of luck here and there.
#236 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
Luck true, but he didn;t give a fuck. (Probably because he was old as fuck) But I see superman this way. He really has a Messiah complex. There are multiple heros in the DC universe that could take the place of Superman. Everything I've read says Supes wants to live a normal life, but he could never have a normal life. He is better than humans in every way. He's stronger, faster, smarter, lives longer, and can't be hurt by almost anything we have. There is nothing for him but to act as savior of the planet. his character does't make sense to me. I think he should have more a mentality of Dr. Manhattan. Dr. M is a man that because a god. Humans failed to matter to him because we are vastly inferior. He chose to leave the world because it held nothing for him. He didn't want to be there hero. Superman on the other hand doesn't want to be normal. He wants to be savior. He could easily leave the world like Dr. M did. He could even try to live like a normal human. All the heros in the Justice League could easily handle all of those villains.(Doomsday wouldn't even exist if it weren't for Superman) He can't die. When he does the writers just make him slip into a healing coma like after he fought Doomsday. Batman is a human that speant years training his mind and body to protect his city and his father's legacy. He works outside the law under the constant threat of arrest injury and death when he could just live a normal life. A life of ease and being a billionaire. Unlike superman he could live a normal life. but he cares more for his city and fellow humans than he does for himself. Noone could protect gotham the way Batman does. He's also one of the few heros that plans on protecting the world from other heros if need be. That's why i like him better
User avatar #250 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Superman wields the power to throw Earth into the sun, and yet he chooses to defend it. Batman had to train and learn to be a hero? Superman was born with the ability to destroy anything he sees, and he had to learn to control it, train his body to be restrained so that he didn't hurt MILLIONS in the process of saving the world. He doesn't have a messiah complex, He doesnt think he HAS to save the world, he chooses to do so. He could live a normal life since he's learned restraint. He could just forever go on being Clark Kent, but he won't because his sense of justice won't allow it. He was given the power to save us or destroy us and every time he has to choose he saves us. He was even given a chance to rebuild his race, rebuild his home world and start new and live the life of a true kryptonian, but he chose humanity because Krypton had its chance. He has shown that he values life more than any other being in the universe because he realizes how fragile it is. He is one of the last of a dead race, no one knows better than him how easy it is to see life wiped out. That's why I like Superman better, because he could leave, he could just let the weight of the worlds problems fall onto the shoulders of others, but he doesn't because to him, humanity is his family, and Earth is his home.
#206 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
and ill leave this here
#208 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
Yours fan made and taken from an arc were superman wasn't fully in control. Mine taken from a series written by Frank Miller where an elderly Bruce Wayne Beats the shit out of Superman.
#212 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
its not fan made its from volume one of dark knight in the new 52 universe ( i know cuz i actually read)

lets be honest here bruce and clark are too good of freinds to fight in most universes as a matter of fact one of the only times batman cried is when he found out superman had died
#216 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
fan made refering to the Superman Wins part.
User avatar #182 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Batman with kryptonite isn't much use vs a man who can fly and move up to 4 times the speed of light.
User avatar #234 - mrbuu (08/21/2013) [-]
also, superman quoted he is not faster than the speed of light.
User avatar #225 - mrbuu (08/21/2013) [-]
stop you right there on faster then the speed of light thing. in DC commics going the speed of light will cause the individual to fuse with the speed force. and become one with it no longer exsisting. the flash (faster than superman actually proven) can go light speed,but that caused them to fuse with the speed force.
User avatar #273 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Superman was clocked making it to the sun and back in 2 minutes 34 seconds. About four times the speed of light. He was fighting wonder woman at the time so it is likely he can go faster.
#161 - mattass (08/20/2013) [-]
#154 - superman actually know 2 forms of kryptonian martial arts and …  [+] (31 new replies) 08/20/2013 on Batmath... The hero... +14
#201 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
Aren't both of those mental martial arts?
#203 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
tor quantum vo is physical enhancing his fighting and reflexes tor quantum ro is mental
User avatar #155 - lolwtfbbqryan (08/20/2013) [-]
But, is he batman?
#156 - mattass (08/20/2013) [-]
the real question is... is batman superman... superman lost both his biological and adoptive parents not to mention his entire homeplanet and race.. bruce is bitching about his mommy and daddy at least he didnt lose humanity
#193 - beut (08/21/2013) [-]
Batman's parents were killed in front of him, Kent didn't know that his were dead untill he was 15 or so.
User avatar #221 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Yes but he also found out HIS ENTIRE RACE AND PLANET WERE DESTROYED and he was a dying breed, an alien on his home planet. An outcast. But, like Bruce he decided to become a symbol for good and justice.
#293 - beut (08/21/2013) [-]
Still it was kind of easier for him since he was basically a god
#202 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
and he only found out his true heritage after his adoptive parents died
User avatar #186 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
I fucking love you man.
User avatar #159 - lolwtfbbqryan (08/20/2013) [-]
Batman would still whoop superman's ass.
User avatar #185 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
You're stupidity and blatant fanboy-ism is killing us all, Batman is awesome but nowhere near on the same level as Superman. and before you say ANYTHING about fucking kryptonite, Superman has become immune to kryptonite in many story arcs. Superman could kill Batman, easily, but he won't. He values his friendships far more than Batman ever has.
#204 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
I'll just leave this here....
User avatar #272 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Not cannon..
User avatar #235 - bowties (08/21/2013) [-]
>Superman going easy on him because he understands what Bruce is doing is right, and only fights him because The Gipper forced him to
>Bruce had 10 years to plan for this
>Still needed Green Arrow's help
User avatar #207 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Yeah but that was one arc and Batman had a heart attack doing it. He BARELY beat Superman and had to have Ollie's help to do it. and Superman was NOWHERE near max strength. He had eaten a nuke, and had not been exposed to the sun for days.
#213 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
The heart attack was self induced by Bruce Wayne. And all of that was part of his plan. Noone argues the fact that under regular circumstances Superman kills Batman. Superman is a god compared to humans. However, with all of this in place and perfect planning, timing and ingenuity, Batman, a human, beat Superman. That's much more impressive to me than a god beating up humans.
User avatar #217 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
True, but Superman also held back A LOT because he was genuinely fearful of hurting Bruce, one of his best friends and a man he cared for deeply. Had Superman just let loose and punched Bruce with even his weakened state he could have killed him instantly and Batman knew this. He knew this could all go completely wrong and his entire plan hinged on Superman's mercy and Ollie's well timed shot. Don't get me wrong I quite enjoyed the whole scene and movie because Batman is one of my all time favorite heroes, I just wish that the ultra fanboys would quit it with this "Batman just automatically wins because he's Batman" bullshit.
#220 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
No Batman won by careful timing and planning. It's a long shot but he was able to do it. I've never liked Superman because he's basically a god. There is no danger for him and for me he's not a hero at all. Batman is a regular person without super powers. He beat god. That is an achievement. No matter what it too to do it, he still did. He made god bleed. That's more than enough for me. Because of that, Batman wins for me. I think he's a better all round character. And based on abilities alone, not many characters can stand up to Superman. But with his resources the human Bruce Wayne beat Superman. It doesn't get much more badass than that.
User avatar #231 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
To me Superman and Batman stand on equal ground AS HEROES. Because neither will ever give up, no matter how bad the threat is and no matter the potential result. Both would gladly die in the name of justice if it saved another. But in terms of ability, Superman wins. Sure he has the incredibly unfair advantage of being SUPERMAN but he is the one who saves the world every time it needs saving. Bruce just isn't on that level, not to say he hasn't defeated enemies far above his level and done incredible things for a human but he does have one thing most others don't; money. Lots and lots of it. He also is smart as hell and very well trained so he's not just an average human.
User avatar #229 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Then you've never actually looked at Superman through unbiased eyes. He is almost a god, but there is real danger out there for him. The villains he faces in some cases ARE ACTUAL GODS and others far above him. Doomsday, Darkseid, Brainiac, Zod, among others. All of which where at, or above his level. His character is really well put together and I find him to be one of the best superheroes around. I used to think EXACTLY like you dude, until I actually did my research and understood all of his character. I'm not saying it wasn't impressive, he did make a god bleed, but Bruce himself said he didn't know if it would work or not and the chances were low. And imagine had the events leading up to it had not weakened Superman? How would Bruce have beaten him then? I'm just saying his victory was both the result of his incredible planning and a few dashes of luck here and there.
#236 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
Luck true, but he didn;t give a fuck. (Probably because he was old as fuck) But I see superman this way. He really has a Messiah complex. There are multiple heros in the DC universe that could take the place of Superman. Everything I've read says Supes wants to live a normal life, but he could never have a normal life. He is better than humans in every way. He's stronger, faster, smarter, lives longer, and can't be hurt by almost anything we have. There is nothing for him but to act as savior of the planet. his character does't make sense to me. I think he should have more a mentality of Dr. Manhattan. Dr. M is a man that because a god. Humans failed to matter to him because we are vastly inferior. He chose to leave the world because it held nothing for him. He didn't want to be there hero. Superman on the other hand doesn't want to be normal. He wants to be savior. He could easily leave the world like Dr. M did. He could even try to live like a normal human. All the heros in the Justice League could easily handle all of those villains.(Doomsday wouldn't even exist if it weren't for Superman) He can't die. When he does the writers just make him slip into a healing coma like after he fought Doomsday. Batman is a human that speant years training his mind and body to protect his city and his father's legacy. He works outside the law under the constant threat of arrest injury and death when he could just live a normal life. A life of ease and being a billionaire. Unlike superman he could live a normal life. but he cares more for his city and fellow humans than he does for himself. Noone could protect gotham the way Batman does. He's also one of the few heros that plans on protecting the world from other heros if need be. That's why i like him better
User avatar #250 - superunclesam (08/21/2013) [-]
Superman wields the power to throw Earth into the sun, and yet he chooses to defend it. Batman had to train and learn to be a hero? Superman was born with the ability to destroy anything he sees, and he had to learn to control it, train his body to be restrained so that he didn't hurt MILLIONS in the process of saving the world. He doesn't have a messiah complex, He doesnt think he HAS to save the world, he chooses to do so. He could live a normal life since he's learned restraint. He could just forever go on being Clark Kent, but he won't because his sense of justice won't allow it. He was given the power to save us or destroy us and every time he has to choose he saves us. He was even given a chance to rebuild his race, rebuild his home world and start new and live the life of a true kryptonian, but he chose humanity because Krypton had its chance. He has shown that he values life more than any other being in the universe because he realizes how fragile it is. He is one of the last of a dead race, no one knows better than him how easy it is to see life wiped out. That's why I like Superman better, because he could leave, he could just let the weight of the worlds problems fall onto the shoulders of others, but he doesn't because to him, humanity is his family, and Earth is his home.
#206 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
and ill leave this here
#208 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
Yours fan made and taken from an arc were superman wasn't fully in control. Mine taken from a series written by Frank Miller where an elderly Bruce Wayne Beats the shit out of Superman.
#212 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
its not fan made its from volume one of dark knight in the new 52 universe ( i know cuz i actually read)

lets be honest here bruce and clark are too good of freinds to fight in most universes as a matter of fact one of the only times batman cried is when he found out superman had died
#216 - lemortedemiller (08/21/2013) [-]
fan made refering to the Superman Wins part.
User avatar #182 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Batman with kryptonite isn't much use vs a man who can fly and move up to 4 times the speed of light.
User avatar #234 - mrbuu (08/21/2013) [-]
also, superman quoted he is not faster than the speed of light.
User avatar #225 - mrbuu (08/21/2013) [-]
stop you right there on faster then the speed of light thing. in DC commics going the speed of light will cause the individual to fuse with the speed force. and become one with it no longer exsisting. the flash (faster than superman actually proven) can go light speed,but that caused them to fuse with the speed force.
User avatar #273 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Superman was clocked making it to the sun and back in 2 minutes 34 seconds. About four times the speed of light. He was fighting wonder woman at the time so it is likely he can go faster.
#161 - mattass (08/20/2013) [-]
#120 - yeah sure i "love" you 08/20/2013 on obama -1
#89 - Picture  [+] (5 new replies) 08/20/2013 on Don't fuck with 'merica +30
#185 - bunssugar (08/21/2013) [-]
#187 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
#170 - kurokoda (08/21/2013) [-]
#103 - dezzka (08/21/2013) [-]
User avatar #95 - communityservices (08/20/2013) [-]
Under ANY circumstances, why would you run out of the shower?!
#67 - mfw i know batman doesnt use guns anyway  [+] (4 new replies) 08/20/2013 on Thumbs up 0
User avatar #81 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Grappling gun?
#87 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
grappling "hook"
#89 - asasqw (08/21/2013) [-]
Hook fired from a gun
#105 - mattass (08/21/2013) [-]
but not a firearm
#1 - op here btw this is oc  [+] (1 new reply) 08/20/2013 on well this is a thing +2
#3 - opchow (08/20/2013) [-]
#204 - Picture 08/20/2013 on This guy knows what he is... +1
#114 - hes asain pretending to eat it  [+] (1 new reply) 08/20/2013 on Sterio Types +2
User avatar #117 - djlonthree (08/20/2013) [-]
no that is cannibalism
#170 - Picture 08/20/2013 on Epic win +4
#23 - Picture 08/20/2013 on This is the face +2
#78 - um why? 08/20/2013 on Look at this gif +2
#23 - Picture 08/20/2013 on black parenting +3
#75 - i know... congrats  [+] (2 new replies) 08/20/2013 on Look at this gif +1
#77 - FreshPrinceOfLa (08/20/2013) [-]
gay
#78 - mattass (08/20/2013) [-]
um why?
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User avatar #1 - emberstar (09/11/2013) [-]
Cool, let me know if you make a Batman one.

Putting this here, as OP deleted the content...
#2 to #1 - mattass (09/11/2013) [-]
yeah sorry i figured i was gonna post them all at once so keep an eye out
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