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matexius

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Interests: Music, Games, TV, Internet
Date Signed Up:6/11/2012
Last Login:3/30/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#4776
Comment Ranking:#4573
Highest Content Rank:#3806
Highest Comment Rank:#1928
Content Thumbs: 2037 total,  2513 ,  476
Comment Thumbs: 3971 total,  4361 ,  390
Content Level Progress: 39% (39/100)
Level 119 Content: Funny Junkie → Level 120 Content: Respected Member Of Famiry
Comment Level Progress: 89% (89/100)
Level 231 Comments: Ambassador Of Lulz → Level 232 Comments: Ambassador Of Lulz
Subscribers:0
Content Views:130817
Times Content Favorited:148 times
Total Comments Made:2099
FJ Points:3807
Favorite Tags: are cool (2) | it burns (2)

latest user's comments

#135 - OP's a lesbian... Faggot doesn't really apply here, now does it?  [+] (3 new replies) 03/09/2015 on I DRAW REALLY GOOD! 0
User avatar #194 - stocxt (03/09/2015) [-]
You can be a faggot no matter what you are
Don't be so close minded yo
User avatar #143 - leonhardt (03/09/2015) [-]
It literally applies here.
User avatar #189 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
Doesn't faggot apply to a gay dude...not a chick?
Or has it become unisex?
#101 - I just have to keep a low profile... the teacher's in... …  [+] (19 new replies) 03/09/2015 on ..what was that? +2
User avatar #102 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
i will forever remember your heroic action~
User avatar #103 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
his herotic action?
User avatar #134 - stifflimb (03/09/2015) [-]
His erect action?
#104 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
#105 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
#106 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
#107 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
yet another internet victory
User avatar #108 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
shouldn't you pay attention in class?
User avatar #109 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
what class am i in?
User avatar #110 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
oh right, the other lad was at school....
Move along then~
#111 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
kk bby
#133 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Who is that? Is he like a politician, a show host or a wrestler? Honestly. By the way he walks, the odd confidence, the outfit and the silhouette he can be any of those.
User avatar #136 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
he's a wwe announcer i believe
#137 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
He seems to have quite the reputation. Is he rich or does he have a reason to look like it?

It's fun how many preassumptions you can make from someone's way of walking, regardless of whether he's faking or not.
User avatar #138 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
i would assume he's rich, but he also does some funny shit. he's very gif-able. there's also the fact that 101% of the people in wwe overact
#140 - AZSYANKEE (03/09/2015) [-]
That's Vince McMahon. Owner of the WWE. >MFW people don't even know Vince.
#142 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Aah. Arrite. American?
#139 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Like overcompensation or appeal to public?

I should prolly have a look at it if it's that funny, though according to experience I'm not too fond of american humor. Feels like the main point of it is "Haha look how much better we are than them" and fully disregarding the fact that people are trying to be funny.
Brittish humor on the other hand is about smart people being immature or silly. Somehow it's a lot more appealing. Fuck if I know why - I'm not a shrink.


So, is there any fun stuff on youtube?
User avatar #141 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
both

they're funny in more of a porn acting type way. it's not what you came for, but you'll chuckle every now and then

totes.
#99 - Oh **** ... I'm in school... hang on then... He…  [+] (21 new replies) 03/09/2015 on ..what was that? +3
User avatar #100 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
Thank you, I knew you had it in you~
#101 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
I just have to keep a low profile...
the teacher's in...
I was never here...
User avatar #102 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
i will forever remember your heroic action~
User avatar #103 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
his herotic action?
User avatar #134 - stifflimb (03/09/2015) [-]
His erect action?
#104 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
#105 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
#106 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
#107 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
yet another internet victory
User avatar #108 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
shouldn't you pay attention in class?
User avatar #109 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
what class am i in?
User avatar #110 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
oh right, the other lad was at school....
Move along then~
#111 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
kk bby
#133 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Who is that? Is he like a politician, a show host or a wrestler? Honestly. By the way he walks, the odd confidence, the outfit and the silhouette he can be any of those.
User avatar #136 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
he's a wwe announcer i believe
#137 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
He seems to have quite the reputation. Is he rich or does he have a reason to look like it?

It's fun how many preassumptions you can make from someone's way of walking, regardless of whether he's faking or not.
User avatar #138 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
i would assume he's rich, but he also does some funny shit. he's very gif-able. there's also the fact that 101% of the people in wwe overact
#140 - AZSYANKEE (03/09/2015) [-]
That's Vince McMahon. Owner of the WWE. >MFW people don't even know Vince.
#142 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Aah. Arrite. American?
#139 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Like overcompensation or appeal to public?

I should prolly have a look at it if it's that funny, though according to experience I'm not too fond of american humor. Feels like the main point of it is "Haha look how much better we are than them" and fully disregarding the fact that people are trying to be funny.
Brittish humor on the other hand is about smart people being immature or silly. Somehow it's a lot more appealing. Fuck if I know why - I'm not a shrink.


So, is there any fun stuff on youtube?
User avatar #141 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
both

they're funny in more of a porn acting type way. it's not what you came for, but you'll chuckle every now and then

totes.
#65 - That chick just went full hissy fit... 03/09/2015 on everrrr again +11
#111 - This... actually seems kinda nice... 4 bedrooms and 2 bat…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/09/2015 on looking for a room mate 0
User avatar #120 - Lainge (03/09/2015) [-]
"A bit"
#74 - I could die happy... 03/09/2015 on Parks & Rec +1
#96 - Even if she quit doing the porn stuff... she's always gon…  [+] (24 new replies) 03/09/2015 on ..what was that? +4
#119 - kaboomz (03/09/2015) [-]
User avatar #98 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
that's one sexy thumbnail
#99 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
Oh shit...
I'm in school... hang on then...
Here we go... this should do it...
User avatar #100 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
Thank you, I knew you had it in you~
#101 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
I just have to keep a low profile...
the teacher's in...
I was never here...
User avatar #102 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
i will forever remember your heroic action~
User avatar #103 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
his herotic action?
User avatar #134 - stifflimb (03/09/2015) [-]
His erect action?
#104 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
#105 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
#106 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
#107 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
yet another internet victory
User avatar #108 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
shouldn't you pay attention in class?
User avatar #109 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
what class am i in?
User avatar #110 - erotictentacle (03/09/2015) [-]
oh right, the other lad was at school....
Move along then~
#111 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
kk bby
#133 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Who is that? Is he like a politician, a show host or a wrestler? Honestly. By the way he walks, the odd confidence, the outfit and the silhouette he can be any of those.
User avatar #136 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
he's a wwe announcer i believe
#137 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
He seems to have quite the reputation. Is he rich or does he have a reason to look like it?

It's fun how many preassumptions you can make from someone's way of walking, regardless of whether he's faking or not.
User avatar #138 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
i would assume he's rich, but he also does some funny shit. he's very gif-able. there's also the fact that 101% of the people in wwe overact
#140 - AZSYANKEE (03/09/2015) [-]
That's Vince McMahon. Owner of the WWE. >MFW people don't even know Vince.
#142 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Aah. Arrite. American?
#139 - afaik (03/09/2015) [-]
Like overcompensation or appeal to public?

I should prolly have a look at it if it's that funny, though according to experience I'm not too fond of american humor. Feels like the main point of it is "Haha look how much better we are than them" and fully disregarding the fact that people are trying to be funny.
Brittish humor on the other hand is about smart people being immature or silly. Somehow it's a lot more appealing. Fuck if I know why - I'm not a shrink.


So, is there any fun stuff on youtube?
User avatar #141 - dorfdorfdorf (03/09/2015) [-]
both

they're funny in more of a porn acting type way. it's not what you came for, but you'll chuckle every now and then

totes.
#71 - Nope... the girl with the marshmallow gun is played by Aub…  [+] (2 new replies) 03/09/2015 on Parks & Rec +2
User avatar #72 - brothergrimm (03/09/2015) [-]
maybe i'm just weird and maybe it's the fever baking my brain in my skull, but imagine a threesome with those two
#74 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
I could die happy...
#69 - What I want to achieve in life is to have a relationship like …  [+] (4 new replies) 03/09/2015 on Parks & Rec +14
#70 - brothergrimm (03/09/2015) [-]
Is that the girl from Hellboy?!
User avatar #71 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
Nope...
the girl with the marshmallow gun is played by Aubrey Plaza
Liz Sherman from Hellboy is played by Selma Blair
I can see the resemblance though...
I loved those movies... not that anyone cares

hello
User avatar #72 - brothergrimm (03/09/2015) [-]
maybe i'm just weird and maybe it's the fever baking my brain in my skull, but imagine a threesome with those two
#74 - matexius (03/09/2015) [-]
I could die happy...
#2089 - Komrade...I'm gonna need an opinion-check from you... What…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/07/2015 on krasnogvardiech's profile 0
User avatar #2090 - krasnogvardiech (03/08/2015) [-]
Must be a fan of the Astartes. Didn't think Sororitas would go that far, but apparently they would.
#37 - Nah, there's nothing like that.... There's essentially the… 03/07/2015 on Wanted: Part 1 0
#32 - Hey, Dragonchampion! Could you please upload Witch Doctor.…  [+] (3 new replies) 03/07/2015 on Wanted: Part 1 +5
User avatar #36 - Dragonchampion (03/07/2015) [-]
Also, gore isn't an issue unless it's blatant super-sore, it's nip slips and nudity that is the major issue.
#37 - matexius (03/07/2015) [-]
Nah, there's nothing like that....
There's essentially the level of gore you'd find on Morbid channel or something... Of course...I only read Witch Doctor... which has 4 issues, there's also WD: Mal Practice which has the remaining 6, so I don't know about them...

Thanks.
User avatar #35 - Dragonchampion (03/07/2015) [-]
I'll add it to my comic list. Only 10 issues so that's good.
#64 - The 5 Hulks of Zoretha...? Not really...cute... more..… 03/06/2015 on Cute Dog +1
#43 - Damn... this is cool... 03/05/2015 on Explanation Engineer +1
#37 - Sweden...Wait...Wait? The feminazis there almost made porn ill…  [+] (2 new replies) 03/05/2015 on The Darkness of an SJW Future +1
#38 - syrianbro (03/05/2015) [-]
It's too late son

The only people that can REALLY stop this are smart feminists but those are like a diying species at this moment.


User avatar #66 - xgrandmoffx (03/05/2015) [-]
We can't declare their culture by fiat means, for reform must come from within. We must place our hope, then, in Basedmom. May she continue to preach human values, and may the sheep of the world activate their brains and turn to her for guidance.
#34 - Hey there... You take requests for your DnD comps right? … 03/03/2015 on tigtone's profile 0
#2056 - Krasno, get over here! You need to check this out... This…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/02/2015 on krasnogvardiech's profile 0
User avatar #2057 - krasnogvardiech (03/03/2015) [-]
Cool. I'm leaving a comment on it.
#65 - The **** ...? 03/02/2015 on Molg H. Comp 0
#7 - Oh no... 03/01/2015 on Anime Facts: Fairy Tail Part 1 +1
#3 - Wait...Grell's a guy? Wellp...  [+] (1 new reply) 03/01/2015 on Anime Facts: Black Butler... +3
User avatar #9 - syntheticdoll (03/01/2015) [-]
I know, i only realized that when I saw him shirtless.
#52 - Picture 03/01/2015 on When you get frontpage 0
#122 - Picture 02/28/2015 on Italians +2
#78 - And before he died with a smile on his face, he whispered: Cle… 02/24/2015 on FJ Writes A Story +1
#136 - So what if they don't believe... I'll tell it to people then w… 02/23/2015 on Sherry +1
#134 - **matexius used "*roll rpg name*"** **matexius rolls Hraedin** 02/20/2015 on rpg name generator 0

items

Total unique items point value: 24968 / Total items point value: 48815
[ 79 items Total ]
Latest users (1): matexius, anonymous(1).
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#59 - admin (03/25/2015) [+] (1 reply)
stickied by matexius
Hi matexius! Great leader gave you a magical North Korean rocket!
#58 - misskayla ONLINE (03/24/2015) [-]
User avatar #56 to #55 - matexius ONLINE (03/10/2015) [-]
Wellp... that answered that question...
I should have paid more attention the last time I read through that...or at least...not forget 95% of it ever since I did...
User avatar #49 - kimjongnam (06/24/2014) [-]
That comment of yours went by quicker Rebecca Black's moment of fame.
User avatar #50 to #49 - matexius ONLINE (06/24/2014) [-]
Quite... I hate being unprofesional.

Forgeting the reaction picture is one of those cases... it bring shame to Motherland...
I take making people laugh very seriously...
#51 to #50 - kimjongnam (06/24/2014) [-]
Finally! I've found a dedicated hard working capitalistic swine that is aware of all the dishonor he brings.
Finally! I've found a dedicated hard working capitalistic swine that is aware of all the dishonor he brings.
#52 to #51 - matexius ONLINE (06/24/2014) [-]
Swine? No... in Mother Россия we eat Swine.   
And people who bring shame is sent to GULag.
Swine? No... in Mother Россия we eat Swine.
And people who bring shame is sent to GULag.
#53 to #52 - kimjongnam (06/24/2014) [-]
Russia you say? I mistook you for a fat Oh Bama cocksucker.
User avatar #54 to #53 - matexius ONLINE (06/24/2014) [-]
Nyet tovarish... Obama destroy world. USA turn city to desert, steals oil. Bad business, may good look, but is bad.
Communism only way to survive.
User avatar #44 to #43 - matexius ONLINE (02/07/2014) [-]
Where do you even find these?
User avatar #45 to #44 - krasnogvardiech (02/07/2014) [-]
The Traditional Games board on 4chan, /tg/. That is one of the sole good places on that site.
User avatar #46 to #45 - matexius ONLINE (02/07/2014) [-]
Considering some of the sutff I've seen on 4chan...I have to agree...
User avatar #47 to #46 - krasnogvardiech (02/07/2014) [-]
/k/'s alright too. It's got decent content, anyway.
#33 - krasnogvardiech (02/03/2014) [-]
Heretical this may be, it is a message that is needing to be spread.
User avatar #34 to #33 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
Don't worry I'll be sure to put this when I find relevance.
And here are some of my... thingyes:
1. We are just human, and even Immortals and Gods... get older, while it doesn't show on their outside... they still gosh-damn do.
2. Killing Xenos might be a problem, considering...well...Carnifexs and Nemesors, etc. Though...everything has a weakness. Be it Tyranids, Necrons, Tau,...
Finding the Tyranid Hivemind could be a serious advantage, of course it they have one, something like a huge creature, that controls every Tyranid, if not...capturing and studying a Tyranid might reveal a way to make them destroy themselves.
3. Humans were/will be/are not perfect, Chaos can corrupt us, no matter how righteous our intentions are... Humans are a selfish race, afterall. No matter who leads us, be it The Emperor in his Golden armor or a regular human in a tie.
4. Why can't we all just get along?
I'm gonna put a few pics below, a few might be useful...
#35 to #34 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
This could come in handy...
#36 to #35 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
Baneblade tank...

Holy Emperor...
#37 to #36 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
This guy's badass...
#38 to #37 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
You might already have this one

Go on, Click it...
#39 to #38 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
Farnsworth...

That cap looks... familiar?
#40 to #39 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
DAVE, CALM YOUR THRUSTERS FOR THE EMPERORS SAKE!!!!

Some people have no self-control...
#41 to #40 - matexius ONLINE (02/03/2014) [-]
And...because I'm getting SC2: Heart of the Swarm in a few weeks... this is just something I found on the interwebz.

If you ever decide to play it...this guy... is...well...awesome...
#42 to #41 - krasnogvardiech (02/03/2014) [-]
I had everything except for Dave. God-Emperor damn it, Dave!
#23 - krasnogvardiech (10/23/2013) [-]
It was my honour to bring you in to the glory of the Forty-First Mullenium.
User avatar #24 to #23 - matexius ONLINE (10/23/2013) [-]
*Internet Brofist*
#25 to #24 - krasnogvardiech (10/23/2013) [-]
Myself, what captured me was the God-Emperor of Mankind. And y'know what, the thing that really got me was the actual humanity of the guy.

He's a dictator, who enforced harsh measures, but he was the most damn honest one mankind's ever had, and he had our best interests truly in heart.
He came up from Central Anatolia, 8000 BC, and for thirty millenia guided mankind - ALL humankind - from the back-scenes until he finally had enough somewhere near M23.
Even the guy's very existence is one of sacrifice. His creation? Tens if not hundreds of thousands of powerful psykers - world leaders, tribal shamans, witch-doctors and great philosophers just to name a few - all of them reincarnated as one into this massive legend of a person.

Honestly speaking, if the Emperor was a real being I would go with him. He simply has the best interests of us as a whole in heart.
User avatar #26 to #25 - matexius ONLINE (10/23/2013) [-]
Read about him like 10 minutes ago.
Sadly all that sustains him now is ancient tech and pure will power. I have to respect that, even if he is a dictator, but hey...
#29 to #26 - krasnogvardiech (10/23/2013) [-]
He's remaining in existence through sheer force of will.

Literally, a real man doesn't die, even when he's killed.

I will love you if you get this reference. Only a little homo.
#27 to #26 - krasnogvardiech has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #28 to #27 - matexius ONLINE (10/23/2013) [-]
Gurren lagan?
#31 to #30 - matexius ONLINE (10/23/2013) [-]
Yoko is hot and pretty much on my list of ''Girls I want to get into bed, before I die'' list, which I'm pretty sure everyone has...
I mean come on, just try to maintain eye contact!
User avatar #32 to #31 - krasnogvardiech (10/24/2013) [-]
Hehe. Everybody.

She's 21 post-timeskip, by the way.
#1 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
HERE WE GO, SKIY OF BROS.

Hm. It seems that I've taken your profile comment virginity.

Dohoho.

Steampunk/Deep sea dump is a go! Not all of them are backgrounds, however.
User avatar #5 to #1 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
Too bad I can't give thumbs <here>.
#7 to #5 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Comments... comments never change.

People do. Through the comments they post.
#9 to #7 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
No matter, how much I tell it to myself. It still sounds wierd.
User avatar #11 to #9 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
As deep as the sea you asked me to post?
User avatar #15 to #11 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
Depends where in the sea.
#2 to #1 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Not exactly Deep-Sea, but it counts, right?
#3 to #2 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
I have Steampunk Spartans. I don't remember how I got these.
#4 to #3 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Underwater at least?
#8 to #6 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Does this count?

Personally, I prefer open, airy skies and airports over deep-sea things. I guess you'll be the Nuclear-Submarine captain while I'll be the Air Ace, right?
User avatar #13 to #8 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
I would prefer yes. I loved the book 20,000 leagues under the sea.
Well, if I ever will be. We'll have to meet eachother for a cup of tea on either my submarine or your sky-ship.
User avatar #16 to #13 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
Skyship meets Submarine. I like the sound of that a lot.
#21 to #16 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
I understand that
While everyone else looks for the sky and beyond for freedom, I look towards the endless prairies, the deepest abyss and the darkest reaches of the deep sea. While above the surface, the strongest tempest rages, I dive into the seas calm arms. In the deep blue, the world on land is nothing more than a distant memory, fading away.
Word of advice: If you ever go to the deep. NEVER sing the Jaws Theme song.
#10 to #8 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
What I should have opened this dump with.
User avatar #17 to #10 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
I can so see that line in the movie, if they did it of course.
#12 to #10 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
I am Russia. Very cute and sex.
#19 to #18 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
As an appreciator of marine craft even though my preference is in the aeronautical field, this makes me sad. Such a good boat.
#20 to #19 - krasnogvardiech (08/20/2013) [-]
This is all I'll be posting for now. It's 2 AM here and my eyelids are getting twitchy.
User avatar #22 to #20 - matexius ONLINE (08/20/2013) [-]
Goodbye, my high-flying friend.
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