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lazorman    

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lazorman Avatar Level 256 Comments: Contaminated Win
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Date Signed Up:3/15/2010
Last Login:9/22/2014
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#12815
Highest Content Rank:#4947
Highest Comment Rank:#1541
Content Thumbs: 656 total,  932 ,  276
Comment Thumbs: 5995 total,  7605 ,  1610
Content Level Progress: 20% (2/10)
Level 65 Content: FJ Cultist → Level 66 Content: FJ Cultist
Comment Level Progress: 35% (35/100)
Level 256 Comments: Contaminated Win → Level 257 Comments: Contaminated Win
Subscribers:3
Content Views:31607
Times Content Favorited:36 times
Total Comments Made:1757
FJ Points:2553
Favorite Tags: giggity (24) | funny (4) | sexy (4) | win (4) | epic (3) | giggty (3) | i (3) | Babies (2) | black (2) | derp (2) | dolan (2) | oh yeah (2) | pig (2) | the (2) | troll (2)

latest user's comments

#38 - these numbers mean literally nothing. iceland is worth $14…  [+] (1 new reply) 02/26/2014 on Gap Could Buy Just About... +10
User avatar #75 - xboxperks (02/26/2014) [-]
Iceland's GDP is worth $14 billion. My roommate and I saw this a few days ago and all these are shit facts.

It took $10 billion to MAKE the Hubble... it's definitely not worth that much now.
#65 - hey cmon man, it was good for a crash course  [+] (1 new reply) 02/26/2014 on (untitled) 0
User avatar #66 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
...i guess >:I
#54 - CONT FROM ABOVE BUUUUUTTTTT now the dominion, UE…  [+] (5 new replies) 02/26/2014 on (untitled) +2
User avatar #64 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
HOW DARE YOU NOT KNOW EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT THIS OLD-ASS GAME *slap*
#65 - lazorman (02/26/2014) [-]
hey cmon man, it was good for a crash course
User avatar #66 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
...i guess >:I
User avatar #62 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
"so then jim meets this HOT-ASS ghost chick named sarah kerrigan and they fuck"
they already knew each other and fucked previously
also the other protoss chick who wasn't important was the matriarch of the dark templar
also when the overmind was dead you also missed the bit where the zerg broods went feral and began to fight each other n shit
also aldaris' "betrayal"
also dugalle was kill
#60 - wimwam (02/26/2014) [-]
Thanks for the bedtime story
#53 - alright so in brood war, **** gets a little more …  [+] (6 new replies) 02/26/2014 on (untitled) +2
User avatar #54 - lazorman (02/26/2014) [-]
CONT FROM ABOVE


BUUUUUTTTTT now the dominion, UED, and protoss have allied against her. the last mission in the game is her defending against all three of those fleets at the same time. and it's fucking hard. but HEY she did it WOOO
she destroys the UED fleet and forces the protoss and remaining terrans into very weak positions.
the game ends with her saying "blah blah ill allow my enemies reprieve blah blah I can fuck their shit up any day because im fucking kerrigan"

THEN STARCRAFT 2 HAPPENS and you know that.

hope i helped, brother bear
User avatar #64 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
HOW DARE YOU NOT KNOW EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT THIS OLD-ASS GAME *slap*
#65 - lazorman (02/26/2014) [-]
hey cmon man, it was good for a crash course
User avatar #66 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
...i guess >:I
User avatar #62 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
"so then jim meets this HOT-ASS ghost chick named sarah kerrigan and they fuck"
they already knew each other and fucked previously
also the other protoss chick who wasn't important was the matriarch of the dark templar
also when the overmind was dead you also missed the bit where the zerg broods went feral and began to fight each other n shit
also aldaris' "betrayal"
also dugalle was kill
#60 - wimwam (02/26/2014) [-]
Thanks for the bedtime story
#51 - alright, buckle up ************ because I'm about…  [+] (8 new replies) 02/26/2014 on (untitled) +2
#52 - wimwam (02/26/2014) [-]
Please go on.
User avatar #53 - lazorman (02/26/2014) [-]
alright so in brood war, shit gets a little more real.

this time, you begin with the protoss. they're all sad and what not because the zerg invaded their homeworld Aiur in the original game. shit was NOT cash. basically the entire protoss part of the game is them getting these crystals that can activate an ancient alien temple and completely wipe the zerg off the planet. they do that. but OMG, turns out kerrigan WANTED them to do that, because it got rid of the other zerg "cerebrates" (super smart zerg worm things that controlled swarms) that contested her power over the zerg.

MEANWHILE: Earth people received transmissions from the koprulu sector and were all like "oh fuck aliens exist" so they get their shit together and make the United Earth Directorate (UED) and send a big ol fleet over to the sector. they have this thing called a "psi disruptor" which fucks with the zerg's psychic capacities, allowing the UED to semi-controll some zerg forces and really fuck with the humans that were already there (they're called the Dominion."
at this point, everyone in the koprulu sector hates the UED. protoss, zerg, and Dominion forces are fighting them together. this section of the game ends with the UED invading the zerg homeworld and controlling the new Overmind thats growing there.

so kerrigan is pissed as fuck now, because the UED controlled overmind is fucking wither her control over the zerg forces. so, she allies with the dominion and protoss forces to destroy the psi disruptor and invade the main UED planet. THEN SHE BETRAYS THE PROTOSS AND DOMINION (WOW SHOCKER) AND SHE KILLS A COUPLE IMPORTANT CHARACTERS. she then proceeds to blackmail a super powerful protoss dude named Zeratul into killing the new overmind by kidnapping this OTHER powerful protoss chick who isnt important. after the overmind is dead, YAY kerrigan controls all of the zerg in the galaxy!

CONT
User avatar #54 - lazorman (02/26/2014) [-]
CONT FROM ABOVE


BUUUUUTTTTT now the dominion, UED, and protoss have allied against her. the last mission in the game is her defending against all three of those fleets at the same time. and it's fucking hard. but HEY she did it WOOO
she destroys the UED fleet and forces the protoss and remaining terrans into very weak positions.
the game ends with her saying "blah blah ill allow my enemies reprieve blah blah I can fuck their shit up any day because im fucking kerrigan"

THEN STARCRAFT 2 HAPPENS and you know that.

hope i helped, brother bear
User avatar #64 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
HOW DARE YOU NOT KNOW EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT THIS OLD-ASS GAME *slap*
#65 - lazorman (02/26/2014) [-]
hey cmon man, it was good for a crash course
User avatar #66 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
...i guess >:I
User avatar #62 - adunsaveme (02/26/2014) [-]
"so then jim meets this HOT-ASS ghost chick named sarah kerrigan and they fuck"
they already knew each other and fucked previously
also the other protoss chick who wasn't important was the matriarch of the dark templar
also when the overmind was dead you also missed the bit where the zerg broods went feral and began to fight each other n shit
also aldaris' "betrayal"
also dugalle was kill
#60 - wimwam (02/26/2014) [-]
Thanks for the bedtime story
#152 - I'd do it. 02/26/2014 on D&D +1
#312 - never be nice to weird/creepy people. don't be mean eithe…  [+] (1 new reply) 02/26/2014 on A bit of cringe for you guys +7
User avatar #550 - ljxjlos (02/26/2014) [-]
I made that mistake. Felt bad for social outcasts and all and tried to make them feel better by behaving nicely...hell, how I regret it.

I mean, I still feel bad for them, nowadays, but I for sure won´t try to help them anymore.
#65 - yeah? saturn would look like that? okay  [+] (2 new replies) 02/25/2014 on WTF Fun Fun Facts Comp Vol.... +6
User avatar #66 - Zeigh (02/25/2014) [-]
Sure more or less, right before we all died horrifically as our two planets' gravitational fields pulled each other apart anyway.
User avatar #336 - oosime (02/25/2014) [-]
i think we would just become a natural satellite of saturn. assuming, that is, if it was always like that. if saturn suddenly popped up where the moon was, we might end up inside its atmosphere. not entirely sure, i dont know saturns size off the top of my head.
#8 - there are entire semester-long courses about how/why there is …  [+] (4 new replies) 02/24/2014 on Sometimes i dont understand... 0
User avatar #19 - makomirocket (02/24/2014) [-]
seriously, months? www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7679C7ACE93A5638 explains it in less than 20 mins
User avatar #9 - theivindon (02/24/2014) [-]
And that makes it right?
#38 - 4chan refugee (02/24/2014) [-]
The distinction isn't very big in practical terms though. In parlimentary democracies multiple parties form coalitions to create a governing majority and a minority opposition. In constitutional democracies multiple interest groups band together into two parties to create a governing majority and a minority opposition. The US model has more whining from the purity pony folk but in terms of democratic influence the results are about the same. The bigger problem with the constitutional model is that if the two parties become ideologically sorted enough governing norms break down and a constitutional crisis can break out. (you see this in the R's refusing to perform basic legislative duties like confirming judges or keeping the government operating under Obama).
User avatar #10 - johnmacronstone (02/24/2014) [-]
As an american, no, no it does'nt
#38 - they were one of my favorite bands a while ago, but I saw them… 02/22/2014 on tumblr yo 0
#8 - as a swimmer, let me tell you that there are two types of peop…  [+] (14 new replies) 02/22/2014 on Have you wondered +153
#48 - rishnock (02/23/2014) [-]
As a swimmer, I'll tell you I can't get a stream of urine out in that super tight speedo.
I know everyone else urinates while they swim so they don't have to interrupt their workout session, but I just can't do it.
User avatar #35 - demcupcakes (02/23/2014) [-]
That's the reason i avoid public waters the thought of that disgust me.
User avatar #25 - shakanaquanda (02/23/2014) [-]
fixed*
1.those who admit they pee in the pool
2.dirty, fucking liars
User avatar #16 - derpsenderp (02/22/2014) [-]
Are you fucking serious? that's absolutely disgusting, I thought only kids pee'd in the pools. As a grown adult you shouldnt definetly not do this.
#43 - 4chan refugee (02/23/2014) [-]
There's so much chlorine in the pool it doesn't matter.
User avatar #51 - derpsenderp (02/23/2014) [-]
oh my god are you serious? You actually pee in the pool?
#39 - 4chan refugee (02/23/2014) [-]
You lie. We all do it. Join us be safe join us.
User avatar #41 - derpsenderp (02/23/2014) [-]
I swam when I was a kid for a few years, but me and my friends ALWAYS peed before we went if we had to, and then we left the pool if we still had to pee. But after seeing this post im definetly never going to a pool again.
User avatar #21 - fuckya (02/23/2014) [-]
As a swimmer... Ex-Swimmer my last meet just finished two hours ago , EVERYONE pees in the pool. You drink a whole Gatorade bottle +what ever water you drink in less than two hours and nobody gets out, you know bitches be peeing.
User avatar #17 - derpsenderp (02/22/2014) [-]
should*
User avatar #15 - gorginhanson (02/22/2014) [-]
1. Those who pee in the pool
2. DAMN DIRTY LIARS
User avatar #11 - MurphyUK (02/22/2014) [-]
I don't actually pee in the pool, I just can't do it.
User avatar #13 - shoxx (02/22/2014) [-]
I think i found the 2. kind
User avatar #26 - yunoavailable (02/23/2014) [-]
nah, I can't pee in the pool either. I have a hard enough time peeing in public bathroom. If I had my own pool I could (and would) but for some people you really can't
#226 - straight, white, 18 year olds <3333 02/22/2014 on FJ Demographics 0
#305 - yeah it's wikipedia, but I checked the ciatation 02/22/2014 on 'Murica 0
#45 - congratulations. If I went to my state university, I would als… 02/21/2014 on 'Murica 0
#23 - paying $70 to apply to a top tier school that gives you the op…  [+] (5 new replies) 02/21/2014 on 'Murica +6
User avatar #182 - hemming (02/21/2014) [-]
Yeaah, because every companys dream worker is a guy fresh from college with no experience in anything but tests, alcohol and perhaps drugs..
User avatar #305 - lazorman (02/22/2014) [-]
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McKinsey_%26_Company#Recruiting
yeah it's wikipedia, but I checked the ciatation
User avatar #71 - eurasia (02/21/2014) [-]
You're correct that 70 buckaroos is a relatively small amount, but I find it odd that you must pay to get a chance to study. You don't pay for a job interview so why should you pay for a college application?
User avatar #42 - recruitactivated (02/21/2014) [-]
yeah and the student loans we dont have those in scandinavia... we are paid to go to school
User avatar #45 - lazorman (02/21/2014) [-]
congratulations. If I went to my state university, I would also be paid to go to school. I'm choosing not to though.
#367 - good god is that a fedora 02/19/2014 on funnyjunk is fun!! +2
#43 - this is ******* brilliant 02/18/2014 on Space and that 0
#347 - you sound like cr1tikal  [+] (1 new reply) 02/17/2014 on It's Vocaroo time +2
User avatar #350 - Blargosnarf (02/17/2014) [-]
About to say the same fuckin' thing.
#21 - with starcraft, you don't have to.  [+] (1 new reply) 02/15/2014 on Unpopular opinion Piplup +4
User avatar #35 - RosarioVampire (02/15/2014) [-]
that statement is completely true.
#9 - that sounds horrible 02/14/2014 on glorious... +4
#32 - it's seriously one of the best movies I've seen in years. 02/14/2014 on Lego Bats +1
#11 - this isn't funny 02/10/2014 on One Human Soul. 0
#11 - half of these are complete ******** and the …  [+] (1 new reply) 02/10/2014 on Fun Facts Comp +3
#14 - starandcomet (02/10/2014) [-]
The yogurt one is true. If you have a yeast infection you can shove spoonful of plain yogurt up there and it can help relive the symptoms.
#8 - holy **** 02/08/2014 on Half Life 3 Confirmed +7
#14 - is it even legal to play with the setting THAT low?  [+] (1 new reply) 02/07/2014 on Miley? +8
User avatar #19 - dyalibya (02/07/2014) [-]
some people cant afford to paly any other way
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User avatar #5 to #4 - lazorman (05/19/2012) [-]
OH. HELLO.
WHAT DO YOU WANT.
User avatar #6 to #5 - lazorman (05/19/2012) [-]
WHY ARE YOU FACEPALMING MY COMMENT.
User avatar #7 to #6 - lazorman (05/19/2012) [-]
IT IS 100% TRUE
User avatar #2 - Natelawl (09/15/2011) [-]
So, i payed attention to your comment on my content.
You said you produced music? I'd like to hear a bit! Link please? :D
User avatar #3 to #2 - lazorman (09/15/2011) [-]
haha sweet!
http://soundcloud.com/theshumster

the newest track i've made is for a remix contest... if you like it, you can vote for it on the 16th <3 lol
User avatar #1 - BobTheDestroyer (12/30/2010) [-]
why wont you love me?
User avatar #9 to #1 - lazorman (11/12/2012) [-]
yo idk gucci mang
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