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krasnogvardiech

Rank #139 on Comments
krasnogvardiech Avatar Level 340 Comments: Sold Soul
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Last status update:
Merry Christmas, friends.comment
Personal Info
Gender: male
Consoles Owned: Xbox 360
Video Games Played: Mass Effect (series), Halo 4, Metro: Last Light, Farcry 3, Deadpool: the game, Borderlands 2, Singularity, Darksiders 2, probably other ones that I've forgot right about now.
X-box Gamertag: Krasnogvardiech
Interests: Warhammer 40k, Aviation, Mechanical engineering, Physics, Writing fiction, Firearms, Automobiles, Aircraft, Gaming, Reading, various other things.
Date Signed Up:8/30/2012
Location:New Zealand
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#4342
Comment Ranking:#139
Highest Content Rank:#433
Highest Comment Rank:#111
Content Thumbs: 13175 total,  14997 ,  1822
Comment Thumbs: 46269 total,  50058 ,  3789
Content Level Progress: 82% (82/100)
Level 209 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 210 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 89.6% (896/1000)
Level 340 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 341 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:9
Content Views:812313
Times Content Favorited:1622 times
Total Comments Made:12920
FJ Points:12477
Favorite Tags: warhammer (9) | the (8) | Not (6) | OC (6) | of (6) | to (5) | 40k (3) | a (3) | emperor (3) | for (3) | gaming (3) | it (3) | Life (3) | 4Chan (2) | bat (2) | creed (2) | Deviantart (2) | do (2) | dorfs (2) | elves (2)
I'm fucked in the head. That's about all there is to say.

latest user's comments

#124 - Picture  [+] (4 new replies) 12/15/2014 on Random Wallpaper Comp +1
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#184 - satanicmuffinz (12/15/2014) [-]
amazing quote

fukkin nabbed
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amazing quote

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#184 - satanicmuffinz (12/15/2014) [-]
amazing quote

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amazing quote

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#184 - satanicmuffinz (12/15/2014) [-]
amazing quote

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amazing quote

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#184 - satanicmuffinz (12/15/2014) [-]
amazing quote

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amazing quote

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#184 - satanicmuffinz (12/15/2014) [-]
amazing quote

fukkin nabbed
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#107 - I doth declare a dump.  [+] (22 new replies) 12/15/2014 on Random Wallpaper Comp 0
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#184 - satanicmuffinz (12/15/2014) [-]
amazing quote

fukkin nabbed
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#16 - Comment deleted 12/15/2014 on Internet 0
#35 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 12/15/2014 on tags +2
#36 - derak (12/15/2014) [-]
Glorious.
#33 - Getting swole is a manner of working out so hard your muscle c… 12/15/2014 on tags +1
#408 - You and this site are ******* brilliant, admin. W… 12/15/2014 on vocaroo motivational 0
#406 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 12/15/2014 on vocaroo motivational 0
#408 - krasnogvardiech (12/15/2014) [-]
You and this site are fucking brilliant, admin. We made it so.
#10186468 - Picture 12/15/2014 on autism autism autism autism 0
#5 - **krasnogvardiech rolled user peanutsaurusrex **  [+] (2 new replies) 12/14/2014 on Preordered +6
#6 - peanutsaurusrex (12/14/2014) [-]
#7 - tacticalbacon (12/14/2014) [-]
Dong is the Vietnamese currency
#29 - Link.  [+] (1 new reply) 12/14/2014 on It's a kind of Magic +4
#70 - anonymous (12/14/2014) [-]
that one's hard to read just go to the official site, hpmor.com
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Comments(1859):

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User avatar #1879 - konradkurze (12/25/2014) [-]
Santa Kras gives many gifts to syrianassassins people

C&C Generals - "AK47s for everyone!"
#1878 - bionicpanda (12/24/2014) [-]
Hope you have a nice one
Hope you have a nice one
User avatar #1880 to #1878 - krasnogvardiech (12/25/2014) [-]
Cheers, mate.
#1868 to #1867 - krasnogvardiech (12/24/2014) [-]
That cat's face pretty much sums up my reaction to the Forged Alliance expansion for Supreme Commander.

******* Seraphim.
#1869 to #1868 - syrianassassin ONLINE (12/24/2014) [-]
looks like everything is now being ****** . and we are loosing.
User avatar #1870 to #1869 - krasnogvardiech (12/24/2014) [-]
What's happening?
#1871 to #1870 - syrianassassin ONLINE (12/24/2014) [-]
take a look at this world.

and you tell me whats happening?
User avatar #1872 to #1871 - krasnogvardiech (12/24/2014) [-]
Yes, because I'm not aware of the majority of it - let alone any significant event that's occurred.

**** happens quick, and news doesn't spread as fast.
User avatar #1873 to #1872 - syrianassassin ONLINE (12/24/2014) [-]
**** happens quick because we let it happen.

news are just a puppet. and 98% all belongs to one groups spreading what they want for their own interest.

i guess it is the time (really) to shut down the media.
User avatar #1874 to #1873 - krasnogvardiech (12/24/2014) [-]
Hold on. Nothing happens that easy.

First off, start defining things. Which media do you want to shut down? What do you mean by 'media', the liberal trash of the U.S or the somewhat more honest organizations of the rest of the world?

The world doesn't revolve around the states. And of course it does, that's how fascism works. Not a bad system either, if not for the laziness and spinelessness of those involved.
User avatar #1875 to #1874 - syrianassassin ONLINE (12/24/2014) [-]
the first one is as you said.

as you can see the CIA-SIL are spreading fast because the media support. the only way to shut them down is to close the media in iraq and syria.

but of course the world will go public outcry/
User avatar #1876 to #1875 - krasnogvardiech (12/24/2014) [-]
How would that work? Media in that region consists of people on ham radios reporting things to one another. Except for air traffic controllers and the like, but then again word of mouth is the primarily relied-on source. And you know how bad that is. Unless I'm wrong and they really do look to obviously edited propaganda as the truth.
User avatar #1877 to #1876 - syrianassassin ONLINE (12/24/2014) [-]
this is the problem. the CIA-SIL got stronger because the media. the only way to clear them is first close it then eradicate the area they live in.
#1847 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
ahhhh Kras
i see you trolling the amerifats
User avatar #1848 to #1847 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
Not intentionally. The dude's being an idiot and not giving details and sources. If he backed up his claims with legitimate and verified evidence I'd believe it.
#1849 to #1848 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
implying amerifats give a 						****					 about evidence
implying amerifats give a **** about evidence
User avatar #1850 to #1849 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
Well, I'm a Ukrainian-turned-Kiwi. Facts, evidence, details and the hard crunchy **** is what I work with. No groupthink crap.
User avatar #1851 to #1850 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
no matter where you go
you are of MOTHERLAND

yeah its kinda ****** up how amerifats think they know more about places than the people who LIVE there
#1852 to #1851 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
I may be of Motherland, but I am also of Man. I am TERRAN.

Simple arrogance. The British did that too, except that was back in the days when the Empire was full of hard cunts who earned the right to be arrogant.
#1854 to #1853 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
All the best ideas came from Holy Terra.
User avatar #1855 to #1854 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
aha but the best marines came from motherland

Мать Россия создали Нострамо

HMKids - Lost in the Darkness (Night Hunter Konrad Curze / Конрад Кёрз)
#1856 to #1855 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
*Spetsnaz. Marines are sissies compared to them.
#1857 to #1856 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
< the best space marine

better than your spetsnaz casuals
User avatar #1858 to #1857 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
He's ******* unkillable, what did you expect?

And literally, he cannot die. Even the Emperor's mind-bullets of doom that wiped out Horus couldn't bring that down.
#1859 to #1858 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
plus russians will never look as cool as NIGHT LORDS
#1860 to #1859 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
Yeah, well unlike you we're not supposed to stand around looking cool. It's a side effect.
User avatar #1861 to #1860 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
yeah because your spets are just in and out like casuals and have to come back later if a new problem comes up

Night Lords stick around to cause fear so theres no more enemies brave enough to fight them
#1862 to #1861 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
The Tempestus is supposed to go in-and-out. Call the regular Guard if you want line-holding action.
User avatar #1863 to #1862 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
yeah waste time having to call them back later

and insurgents arent gonna be scared of regular troopers....

casual krasual doesnt understand the benefit of FEAR
#1864 to #1863 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
Who needs fear when the barrels of our tanks are bigger than your head?
User avatar #1865 to #1864 - konradkurze (12/20/2014) [-]
but tanks cant go everywhere, are easily spotted and taken out

User avatar #1866 to #1865 - krasnogvardiech (12/20/2014) [-]
Not when there's another tank outflanking whoever's shooting m8
User avatar #1845 - konradkurze (12/19/2014) [-]
Kras fave movie scene

Soviet Victory and Anthem (1944 version) Over Berlin
#1846 to #1845 - krasnogvardiech (12/19/2014) [-]
Not really. But it's alright.
#1844 - konradkurze (12/19/2014) [-]
sing it with me Kras

National Anthem of USSR
User avatar #1839 - konradkurze (12/12/2014) [-]
KRASNO
i have mission for you comrade
#1840 to #1839 - krasnogvardiech (12/12/2014) [-]
красно армеец готов
User avatar #1841 to #1840 - konradkurze (12/12/2014) [-]
got a troll lurking around redthumbing me, can you please greenthumb my comments before he logs in
User avatar #1842 to #1841 - krasnogvardiech (12/12/2014) [-]
Big bloody deal. You live off yer thumb ratio or something?
User avatar #1843 to #1842 - konradkurze (12/13/2014) [-]
trying to collect items and reds slow me down
User avatar #1835 - konradkurze (12/09/2014) [-]
судьбу России
слава Родины

USA open your eyes.Russia's destiny
#1833 - konradkurze (12/04/2014) [-]
that moment i fear Kras wants to kill me and brew me into alcohol
#1834 to #1833 - krasnogvardiech (12/04/2014) [-]
dis b u

u r potato
User avatar #1824 - konradkurze (12/03/2014) [-]
*pokes* wake up bear
#1825 to #1824 - krasnogvardiech (12/03/2014) [-]
RHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
User avatar #1826 to #1825 - konradkurze (12/03/2014) [-]
bad bear
John West Commercial: Man Fights Bear for Fish
User avatar #1828 to #1827 - konradkurze (12/03/2014) [-]
i have anti-bear weapon

Bear vs crocodile
#1829 to #1828 - krasnogvardiech (12/03/2014) [-]
He was on the steroid
#1830 to #1829 - konradkurze (12/03/2014) [-]
this makes kras sad
#1831 to #1830 - krasnogvardiech (12/03/2014) [-]
*sobs quietly*
User avatar #1832 to #1831 - konradkurze (12/03/2014) [-]
**konradkurze collects your alcoholic tears and sells to irish buyers**
User avatar #1821 - konradkurze (11/22/2014) [-]
ahhhh motherland

Kras youre missing out on weird ****

Mickey Mouse and Spongebob Beat Up RUSSIAN Driver FIGHT!
User avatar #1822 to #1821 - krasnogvardiech (11/22/2014) [-]
Seen it already. We're culturally desensitized to this sort of **** .
User avatar #1823 to #1822 - konradkurze (11/22/2014) [-]
* weird **** every day
* people are feisty as hell
* gunfire is just a daily thing
* people are desensitized to it all

holy **** ..russia is like a huge new york
User avatar #1819 - gugek (11/22/2014) [-]
Good morning! I hope you have a fantastic day my friend .
User avatar #1812 - konradkurze (11/22/2014) [-]
*kidnaps Kras and dumps him in the middle of chechnya with out a 9mm pistol*
User avatar #1813 to #1812 - krasnogvardiech (11/22/2014) [-]
>remove chechen
>acquire ********
>ditch ***********
>migrate south
>remove kebab
User avatar #1814 to #1813 - konradkurze (11/22/2014) [-]
Kraspetsnaz
#1815 to #1814 - krasnogvardiech (11/22/2014) [-]
/k/rasniy gopnik
User avatar #1816 to #1815 - konradkurze (11/22/2014) [-]
a spetsnaz with a fork is more deadly than 100 soldier with rifles
User avatar #1817 to #1816 - krasnogvardiech (11/22/2014) [-]
doubt. Spetsnaz would blow up the rifles before they got them.

Failing that, just remove all the firing pins. Bam, instant 100 clubs.
User avatar #1818 to #1817 - konradkurze (11/22/2014) [-]
my russian friend told me about 2 movies with spetsnaz being awesome

one...a spetsnaz was checking an area with for enemies...a guy jumped out and grabbed his rifle....the struggled for a moment but when the spets figured it was taking too long he just pushed his rifle at the guy, drew his pistol and shot him them got his rifle back

another one had a bad guy with an ak....the spets ran up, and kicked under the gun twice...first time unloading the magazine the second cocking out the chambered round.....the guy was in a state of shock...how did the spets do that....the spets took his rifle....reloaded it, gave it back to the guy....double kicked again to unload it...the guy was impressed...then the spets killed him
User avatar #1802 - anotherponyaccount (11/21/2014) [-]
Thank you Russian-Bear-Man, I avoided egg on my face with that last image
User avatar #1803 to #1802 - krasnogvardiech (11/21/2014) [-]
I lost track of the subject. Which image?
User avatar #1804 to #1803 - anotherponyaccount (11/21/2014) [-]
How so I expect no Australian to read the last pic (Fallout wishlist)
User avatar #1805 to #1804 - krasnogvardiech (11/21/2014) [-]
Oh, that. All good.

So, howzit? I reckon Fallout 4 will bring in either something completely new, or disappointingly less.

Personally, I'd like it to be even more rich with potassium (/k/) than New Vegas was. Each weapon type being a different system, with each different weapon being a different version of so.

Rails, trigger systems, firing pins and barrels, rifling, the works. And silencers and scopes and other such things.
User avatar #1806 to #1805 - anotherponyaccount (11/21/2014) [-]
Strength at 10, Dual wield Gatling lasers
User avatar #1807 to #1806 - krasnogvardiech (11/21/2014) [-]
Give me specifics, you dense ************ !

Strength 10 allows you to hold and effectively use a weapon ~15 kilograms in each hand. Since there is no way you are able to dual-weild heavy minigun laser weapons, they will have to be systems similar to an RCW mounted on submachinegun frames. Since they're laser weapons, recoil will be minimal.
The focusing and optics will be shot to hell right quick. About 30 seconds of sustained fire equalling 600 full-power shots, 3500 half-power shots.
#1808 to #1807 - anotherponyaccount (11/21/2014) [-]
I this not think this through, I just said what I thought was cool but did stop to think if it should.   
 And I meant two gatling lasers, one in left hand and one in right hand
I this not think this through, I just said what I thought was cool but did stop to think if it should.
And I meant two gatling lasers, one in left hand and one in right hand
User avatar #1809 to #1808 - krasnogvardiech (11/21/2014) [-]
Gatling lasers akimbo is just impractical. They're weapons designed to be operated with two or more hands, with the reloading and such.
Pistols are much more easily managed. In that case it's tricky, but not impossible to reload with just one hand.
User avatar #1810 to #1809 - anotherponyaccount (11/21/2014) [-]
Well **** . ************************ .gif and I'd love to continue this conversation but her in Australia it's midnight - so, peace
User avatar #1811 to #1810 - krasnogvardiech (11/21/2014) [-]
Cheers. But I'm actually over in the Scotland of the southern hemisphere, aka Kiwiana. Over the ditch and all that. Anyhoo, have a good one.
User avatar #1798 - konradkurze (11/20/2014) [-]
*prods Kras' jiggly beer belly*
User avatar #1799 to #1798 - krasnogvardiech (11/20/2014) [-]
It's plump, but flattening and hardening gradually. Still hairy as **** .
User avatar #1801 to #1799 - konradkurze (11/20/2014) [-]
beer BEAR belly
User avatar #1784 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
**konradkurze rolls 79**
what percent casual is Kras
#1785 to #1784 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
I only need 21% to kick your ass buddy boyo
User avatar #1786 to #1785 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
**konradkurze rolls 31**
what percent lazy is kras
User avatar #1787 to #1786 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
Siesta.
User avatar #1788 to #1787 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
**konradkurze rolls 0**
this is how many hours a day Kras actually gets out of bed
User avatar #1789 to #1788 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
Brain inside skeleton
cerebral cavity is bed for brain

ergo
never leave bed
User avatar #1790 to #1789 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
**konradkurze rolled comment #78 ** :
suffocated by everything

the voice Kras hears in his head
User avatar #1791 to #1790 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
I killed it
#1792 to #1791 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
yfw killed your brain
User avatar #1793 to #1792 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
Me, b0xxy? **** that **** outta here.
#1794 to #1793 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
this is my power hand
its for slapping bitches who badmouth boxxy

*powerslaps Kras*
User avatar #1795 to #1794 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
Well, **** you and your retard Gaia-playing waifu.
User avatar #1796 to #1795 - konradkurze (11/17/2014) [-]
i bet you kiss girls, faggot
User avatar #1797 to #1796 - krasnogvardiech (11/17/2014) [-]
I also **** 'em right in the pussy.
#1779 - konradkurze (11/14/2014) [-]
i must be really ******* bored if i thought of this
User avatar #1780 to #1779 - krasnogvardiech (11/14/2014) [-]
Yeah, you were.

Come on mate, you're a bloody Primarch. Pull your **** together.
User avatar #1781 to #1780 - konradkurze (11/14/2014) [-]
well not everyone is as boring and 'sane' as you loyalists

a focused mind is a dull mind
User avatar #1782 to #1781 - krasnogvardiech (11/14/2014) [-]
Dull equals getting **** done. I'll gladly trade that off for things.
User avatar #1783 to #1782 - konradkurze (11/15/2014) [-]
dull means stagnation.....
#1778 - matexius (11/13/2014) [-]
Brokranian... I've found something...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2M5l__vCwo

I'd try to translate it... but... I'm still trying to figure out Cyrilic letters...
pic not related...just one of my current background...although I have been listening to Iron Maiden in the last few months...possibly best decision I've made yet...
User avatar #1762 - konradkurze (11/12/2014) [-]
**konradkurze rolls 6**
Krasnogvardiech is:

1:an Imperial Guard
2: a Space Marine
3: a Chaos Marine
4: a Necron
5: an Ork
6: a Sister of battle
7: a Tyranid
8: an Eldar
9: a Dark Eldar
10: a Squat
User avatar #1763 to #1762 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
I ******* hate your text color.
#1764 to #1763 - konradkurze (11/13/2014) [-]
ahhhh
the russian is filled with rage as always
User avatar #1765 to #1764 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
Rage buried deep beneath the drink and soul-crushing cynicism .
User avatar #1766 to #1765 - konradkurze (11/13/2014) [-]
Kras needs anger management....aka vodka
#1767 to #1766 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
No, just a magical creat to remove soreness and blisters. I have a large blister on the underside of my foot, right on the pad. It is on the most annoying and pointless place to have a blister of all time.
#1768 to #1767 - konradkurze (11/13/2014) [-]
i shall fix that for you
#1769 to #1768 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
Augmentic legs... yes please, tovarisch it will be of so cool
#1770 to #1769 - konradkurze (11/13/2014) [-]
ill put your head on a cyborg body so nothing below the neck shall ever bother you
#1771 to #1770 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
But then the face is completely exposed, ******* . Who designed that dude?

Go superheavy or go home, chuck my remains in a Dreadnought shell and put me in this thing.
#1772 to #1771 - konradkurze (11/13/2014) [-]
duh youre a dirty loyalist....you'd get iron hands armor
#1773 to #1772 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
Screw the Space Marines. Imperial Knights all the way.
#1774 to #1773 - konradkurze (11/13/2014) [-]
awwww look at that itty bitty guy...

have your knight...ill take an imperator
#1775 to #1774 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
Good luck not trampling cities when you try to move. I'm providing close walker support to my homies on the ground.
User avatar #1777 to #1776 - krasnogvardiech (11/13/2014) [-]
Well, SOMEONE didn't appease the Machine Spirits.
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