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derpthefifth

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Age: 19
Date Signed Up:11/16/2014
Last Login:1/14/2016
FunnyJunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#1789
Highest Content Rank:#7923
Highest Comment Rank:#419
Content Thumbs: 4 total,  10 ,  6
Comment Thumbs: 11813 total,  14740 ,  2927
Content Level Progress: 8.47% (5/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 45% (45/100)
Level 285 Comments: More Thumbs Than A Hiroshima Survivor → Level 286 Comments: More Thumbs Than A Hiroshima Survivor
Subscribers:0
Content Views:2065
Total Comments Made:4264
FJ Points:8546

latest user's comments

#16 - How is it a ghost when your mother is at the top of the stairs…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/13/2015 on Who do you believe? +2
User avatar
#23 - binuclear (06/13/2015) [-]
Salt, red string, white candle. Sage + Salt mixture helps as well.
It's more paranoia, but I prefer to keep these on hand.
User avatar
#49 - sonicsyndicate (06/13/2015) [-]
keep a knife with salt crystals formed on the blade it works
#13 - Irrelevant... i don't have stairs. No but seriously i…  [+] (4 new replies) 06/13/2015 on Who do you believe? 0
#14 - anon (06/13/2015) [-]
you can't stab ghosts you moron
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#16 - derpthefifth (06/13/2015) [-]
How is it a ghost when your mother is at the top of the stairs telling you not to go, moron.
It's much more likely some sort of clone or alien or skin-walker/shapeshifter.
User avatar
#23 - binuclear (06/13/2015) [-]
Salt, red string, white candle. Sage + Salt mixture helps as well.
It's more paranoia, but I prefer to keep these on hand.
User avatar
#49 - sonicsyndicate (06/13/2015) [-]
keep a knife with salt crystals formed on the blade it works
#18 - That last one is TFW your friend does something ****** … 06/13/2015 on let me tell you about my... 0
#55 - I learned a thing today.... i always thought it was more like …  [+] (2 new replies) 06/13/2015 on what it’s like to read... 0
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#129 - helpful (06/13/2015) [-]
>>#115
#67 - anon (06/13/2015) [-]
Nah, you were right. This post is shit.
#33 - They're not people, though. They don't need to meet the same s… 06/13/2015 on the world’s best pet owners 0
#32 - Comment deleted 06/13/2015 on the world’s best pet owners 0
#31 - Comment deleted 06/13/2015 on Conservative Circlejerk 101 -1
#29 - I don't get why people own pets let alone go to such extremes …  [+] (6 new replies) 06/13/2015 on the world’s best pet owners -3
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#46 - icametocomment (06/13/2015) [-]
It's a symbiotic relationship. Cavemen were able to domesticate wolves because their similar habits and social structures, and guarded and fed eachother. Early farmers valued and protected cats for their talents at getting rid of mice, and in ancient Egypt cats were so important that they were literally worshiped in some places.

Nowadays, we don't need animals so much for the work they can do as for the companionship they can provide. They love unconditionally, and yes, some animals like dogs do feel love, though perhaps not the exact same way we do. A dog gets a burst of happy-hormones when they look at their owner, the same burst an owner gets when they look at their pet. I do agree that people who buy diamond collars and mahogany beds and shit for their pets are pretty stupid, but I see nothing wrong with caring for a pet and wanting to return the affection they give to you.
User avatar
#47 - saltyfries (06/13/2015) [-]
not to mention the fact that pets can still be useful, I used to have a cat for about 10 years grew allergic to cats like a cruel joke , she got rid of mice for us like a pro, I miss that cat.
User avatar
#48 - icametocomment (06/13/2015) [-]
My cats are horrible mousers, one's old and one's a fatass, but our old mutt dog helped us flush out a rat when I was younger. That bastard was so big my dad had to shoot it to effectively kill it (the rat, not the dog).

RIP Alicia
User avatar
#31 - Lainge (06/13/2015) [-]
>Letting your animals have basic things any non-third world human gets such as a warm bed or something to play around in is pampering them.
Fuck nigga.
User avatar
#33 - derpthefifth (06/13/2015) [-]
They're not people, though. They don't need to meet the same standard of living as we do as long as they've got a roof to sleep under, food, and water they're happy like 90% of the time.
#32 - derpthefifth has deleted their comment.
#11 - Maybe some people can have violent outlets like gangs or fight… 06/13/2015 on White kids 0
#42 - Dat shakey cam doe. 06/13/2015 on Served. 0
#20 - So..... when you decided to have extensive plastic surgery to … 06/12/2015 on *Not* human barbie 0
#14 - No.. the baby had one power, he could shape shift. 06/12/2015 on Plot Twist +2
#13 - Unfortunately they made an incredibles 2 game before a movie g…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/12/2015 on Plot Twist -1
#20 - ascartes has deleted their comment.
#44 - Well first of all i'm high, but secondly i was thinking, what … 06/12/2015 on She'd be so lost... 0
#21 - Or you wake up and realize that there's no such thing as soulm…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/12/2015 on She'd be so lost... 0
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#40 - zionsype (06/12/2015) [-]
"Plus what if you found out she was ugly A F and you had to sit there like.... fuck. Am i suppose to settle with my soul mate not being hot.. or is she gonna get hotter somehow? "
If you don't find your "soulmate" attractive, she isn't your soulmate.
Soulmate basically means "perfect match" meaning there should be nothing you dislike about her if she REALLY is your "soulmate"
User avatar
#44 - derpthefifth (06/12/2015) [-]
Well first of all i'm high, but secondly i was thinking, what if you don't meet her now and that she's suppose to be the prefect person for a later you, or a later you is prefect for later her. If i'm making sense.

The ideas of fate and a soulmate go hand in hand, it's like how theoretically some people meet their soulmate right out of high school (Rairly) and some people meet theirs at like 40.
#12 - INb4 pau----- ah **** no it wasn't..... 06/12/2015 on Officer's first time on a... 0
#47 - Yeah but this wasn't a thought i had at like 7 years old... i … 06/11/2015 on dino 0
#43 - I think he learned his lesson..... Dude was having dat omega l… 06/11/2015 on Oldie bout Goaldie 0
#42 - HFW he drops that wall of text. Seriously though why… 06/11/2015 on All men are cheaters +10
#27 - Fairly odd parents mentioned swell with FAIRIES! *twitch* 06/11/2015 on 4 unexplained science... 0
#61 - Gotta be honest though... the only thing that really kept me i… 06/11/2015 on Feels Inbound 0
#30 - Hey now, being a white person i can safely say we're not all t…  [+] (1 new reply) 06/11/2015 on Thin privileged white male... -1
#37 - anon (06/12/2015) [-]
If every single black racist comment can be automatically assumed as a joke why cant this comment be a joke. Right now I'm thinking funnny junk is biase to whites and more racist to blacks if your not allowed to make white jokes.
#84 - He looked happier with the beard. His face seems just a l… 06/11/2015 on Tormund actor with and... +1
#43 - As a kid i always sorta thought this was one of those super tr…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/11/2015 on dino 0
#46 - anon (06/11/2015) [-]
Also there would be no peace on Earth.
User avatar
#47 - derpthefifth (06/11/2015) [-]
Yeah but this wasn't a thought i had at like 7 years old... i just kinda figured if it happened it still wouldn't be a good thing.
#81 - My bad... the actual phrasing i guess just didn't strike me as… 06/11/2015 on I Miss Roseanne +1

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User avatar #2 - chokinandtokin ONLINE (07/25/2015) [-]
Real Time fan?
#1 - isolovegames (04/14/2015) [-]
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