Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search

hide menu

craigdavid

no avatar Level -318 Comment: apprentice dark lord
Offline
Last status update:
-
Personal Info
Date Signed Up:3/03/2012
Last Login:7/10/2014
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Thumbs: 28 total,  0 ,  28
Comment Thumbs: 1774 total,  0 ,  1774
Content Level Progress: 0% (0/1)
Level -28 Content: Sort of disliked → Level -27 Content: Sort of disliked
Comment Level Progress: 42% (42/100)
Level -318 Comment: apprentice dark lord → Level -317 Comment: apprentice dark lord
Subscribers:0
Content Views:1290
Total Comments Made:1389
FJ Points:0

latest user's comments

#9 - how the **** is this greentext 10/18/2013 on vintage greentext is best... 0
#203 - onoes, now little timmy wont have thumbs for xmas :'(  [+] (1 new reply) 10/18/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
User avatar #204 - chryssis (10/18/2013) [-]
Okay
#139 - yeah he'd be better off coming back the same as you will, as s…  [+] (10 new replies) 10/18/2013 on Joseph Smith, Early Mormon 0
#140 - ivroht (10/18/2013) [-]
You're certainly perfectly positioned to compare anyone to a fuckwit, being their King.

If only your sentence made sense that would be at least one thing in your life.

Back to slack-jawed incomprehension with you, your Duh!jesty.
#145 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
slack jawed incomprehension he says, while not understanding my simple comment.

it is playing on the fact that the original thread of jokes was about coming back as the opposite of this, that or the other

also if the duhjesty then i name you lord dickweed, earl of everything from the arsehole hills to the plains of uberfaggotry

you have earned this title sir knight, i expect more cuntish behaviour forthwith

(about slackjawed incomprehension)
#154 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
And that's why it didn't make sense, your Duh!jesty, King Fuckwit, Lord of the Taint, as it makes me not a fuckwit.

Which demonstrates your level of skill at insults: mushroom.

Your realm now extends from slack-jawed incomprehension to the uttermost depths of hapless moronity.
#155 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
imma spell it out for you seeing as the point appears to ba flying so far over your head its in the stratosphere

the opposite of someone who is not a fuckwit is a fuckwit, so if you came back as the opposite of what you are, and you came back as someone not a fuckwit, what would that make you...?

pic related; me running rings round you

about slackjawed incomprehension, im afraid, lord dickweed, im not able to maintain your position as a lord, you are being demoted to a knight due to poor comprehensive skills

better luck next time
#156 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
If only you had the vaguest inkling of how to use punctuation, your Duh!jesty, that might be true. I always knew what you think you said, but not what you actually said.

But your skills at communication are - surprisingly - almost as shit as your skills at abuse and, as we all know, those are very, very, very shit indeed.

You couldn't run rings around a dead hamster; there's no battle of the intellects here, it's like I'm swatting a fly with a nuke.

So, you continue to enjoy your High Fuckwittery and I'll continue to enjoy your total lack of awareness of how dense you apparently are.

Please see if you can find another animated gif that goes along with a long list of repeated "fuckwts" in the hope that you'll convince yourself you don't share the same iq as a jam jar full of frogspawn.

And that's being hard on the frogspawn.
#158 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
also this
#157 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
o u mad

and i forgot how everyone on the internet arses around with perfect spelling

you are a moron

who the fuck swats a fly witha nuke, thats just endangering everyone, fuckwit

i couldnt be arsed to read more of your comment but yeah you a fuckwit
User avatar #159 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
Ah, got you on the ropes. It's not actually swatting a fly with a nuke, dicksplash.

Fatality delivered, our hero rides off into the sunset, departing the Kingduh!m of Fuckwittery, Land of the Taintdwellers...

(Thanks for the banter, catch you next time!)
#160 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
not even gonna lie man you actually won this one, dont even know how but kudos
User avatar #161 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
Ha! Let's call it a draw.
#10 - in your next life youll be born as someone who isnt egotistica…  [+] (12 new replies) 10/17/2013 on Joseph Smith, Early Mormon 0
User avatar #31 - ivroht (10/17/2013) [-]
As long as he doesn't come back as someone as ignorant and tarded as you, he'll be fine.
#139 - craigdavid (10/18/2013) [-]
yeah he'd be better off coming back the same as you will, as someone who isnt a fuckwit
#140 - ivroht (10/18/2013) [-]
You're certainly perfectly positioned to compare anyone to a fuckwit, being their King.

If only your sentence made sense that would be at least one thing in your life.

Back to slack-jawed incomprehension with you, your Duh!jesty.
#145 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
slack jawed incomprehension he says, while not understanding my simple comment.

it is playing on the fact that the original thread of jokes was about coming back as the opposite of this, that or the other

also if the duhjesty then i name you lord dickweed, earl of everything from the arsehole hills to the plains of uberfaggotry

you have earned this title sir knight, i expect more cuntish behaviour forthwith

(about slackjawed incomprehension)
#154 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
And that's why it didn't make sense, your Duh!jesty, King Fuckwit, Lord of the Taint, as it makes me not a fuckwit.

Which demonstrates your level of skill at insults: mushroom.

Your realm now extends from slack-jawed incomprehension to the uttermost depths of hapless moronity.
#155 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
imma spell it out for you seeing as the point appears to ba flying so far over your head its in the stratosphere

the opposite of someone who is not a fuckwit is a fuckwit, so if you came back as the opposite of what you are, and you came back as someone not a fuckwit, what would that make you...?

pic related; me running rings round you

about slackjawed incomprehension, im afraid, lord dickweed, im not able to maintain your position as a lord, you are being demoted to a knight due to poor comprehensive skills

better luck next time
#156 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
If only you had the vaguest inkling of how to use punctuation, your Duh!jesty, that might be true. I always knew what you think you said, but not what you actually said.

But your skills at communication are - surprisingly - almost as shit as your skills at abuse and, as we all know, those are very, very, very shit indeed.

You couldn't run rings around a dead hamster; there's no battle of the intellects here, it's like I'm swatting a fly with a nuke.

So, you continue to enjoy your High Fuckwittery and I'll continue to enjoy your total lack of awareness of how dense you apparently are.

Please see if you can find another animated gif that goes along with a long list of repeated "fuckwts" in the hope that you'll convince yourself you don't share the same iq as a jam jar full of frogspawn.

And that's being hard on the frogspawn.
#158 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
also this
#157 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
o u mad

and i forgot how everyone on the internet arses around with perfect spelling

you are a moron

who the fuck swats a fly witha nuke, thats just endangering everyone, fuckwit

i couldnt be arsed to read more of your comment but yeah you a fuckwit
User avatar #159 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
Ah, got you on the ropes. It's not actually swatting a fly with a nuke, dicksplash.

Fatality delivered, our hero rides off into the sunset, departing the Kingduh!m of Fuckwittery, Land of the Taintdwellers...

(Thanks for the banter, catch you next time!)
#160 - craigdavid (10/20/2013) [-]
not even gonna lie man you actually won this one, dont even know how but kudos
User avatar #161 - ivroht (10/20/2013) [-]
Ha! Let's call it a draw.
#101 - godspeed spidey 10/17/2013 on Pro Quake player tries BF3 0
#198 - be quiet i like getting angry on the internet let me have this faggot  [+] (3 new replies) 10/17/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
User avatar #199 - chryssis (10/17/2013) [-]
He got fucked by it though.
#203 - craigdavid (10/18/2013) [-]
onoes, now little timmy wont have thumbs for xmas :'(
User avatar #204 - chryssis (10/18/2013) [-]
Okay
#28 - cbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…  [+] (2 new replies) 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
#29 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
"murrFican" ?

No, I'm afraid not, however smurfs are originally from my country...
#116 - garymotherfinoak has deleted their comment.
#7 - its a videogame?  [+] (2 new replies) 10/16/2013 on Pro Quake player tries BF3 0
#39 - zight (10/16/2013) [-]
And proms tomorrow?
#101 - craigdavid (10/17/2013) [-]
godspeed spidey
#25 - also **** you on abotu civilised manner …  [+] (1 new reply) 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
User avatar #31 - abotu (10/16/2013) [-]
for the record, in America we spell it civilization. Not a misspelling, simply a cultural difference
#24 - maybe you should have ******* googled it before y…  [+] (4 new replies) 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
#27 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
- If it happened like that, he would have been an selfish prick, so accusing such a person of being "an asshole" would be justified.
- I have seen it happen before.
- www.thefreedictionary.com/civilized
(I thought you were a native speaker?! Seeing as I referenced Belgian highways, were do you think I'm from chap?)
- Why would I put any effort in looking up a story where someone is being an asshole, but gets praised for it?

Now read your last sentence again.
#28 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
cbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa you arent murrfican so you arent trollable :'(
#29 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
"murrFican" ?

No, I'm afraid not, however smurfs are originally from my country...
#116 - garymotherfinoak has deleted their comment.
#10 - ******** admins trying to turn FJ into tumblr now 10/16/2013 on periods 0
#19 - i've read the ******* book that he wrote this sto…  [+] (8 new replies) 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
#22 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
Well guess what buddy,
- I didn't know this anecdote was documented in a book.
- I don't give a shit about the above, I was commenting about the data that was given in the pic, which says he left his car in traffic, meaning on the fucking road, like a dick.
- No shit Sherlock, if he had been, the pic should have said he fucking SWAM to his little girl.

In short, if you had just pointed out in a civilized manner that he parked his car somewhere, we would have been good. As it happened, you're the asshat here.
#25 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
also fuck you on abotu civilised manner

your intiial comment was calling someone an asshole for leaving their car in traffic jam. not civilised thoguhts to me

fuck you even spelt civilised wrong, but i suppose being in murrica you dont know much about civilisation do you
User avatar #31 - abotu (10/16/2013) [-]
for the record, in America we spell it civilization. Not a misspelling, simply a cultural difference
#24 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
maybe you should have fucking googled it before you started slagging someone over somethingyou had only just read in .JPG IMAGE ON FUNNYJUNK

like seriously where was the logic in havinga go at him anyway?
if the traffic was bad enough that he was willing to abandon his car odds on noone in front of or behind him was going anywhere any time soon either. plus there the fact he could just pay a guy fifty quid to pick his car up or suttin

GOOD JOB YOU LOOK INTELLIGENT AS FUCK RIGHT NOW DONTCHA?
#27 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
- If it happened like that, he would have been an selfish prick, so accusing such a person of being "an asshole" would be justified.
- I have seen it happen before.
- www.thefreedictionary.com/civilized
(I thought you were a native speaker?! Seeing as I referenced Belgian highways, were do you think I'm from chap?)
- Why would I put any effort in looking up a story where someone is being an asshole, but gets praised for it?

Now read your last sentence again.
#28 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
cbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa you arent murrfican so you arent trollable :'(
#29 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
"murrFican" ?

No, I'm afraid not, however smurfs are originally from my country...
#116 - garymotherfinoak has deleted their comment.
#7 - dyslexic sure its on porpoise? 10/16/2013 on Victory! 0
#17 - true say i guess 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
#19 - >implying it could possibly be a bad thing to have so many  [+] (3 new replies) 10/16/2013 on lucky bastard 0
User avatar #25 - Welshhobo (10/16/2013) [-]
>implying having many turds is a good thing
#21 - Polomaster (10/16/2013) [-]
User avatar #26 - arreatface (10/16/2013) [-]
>implying all these headsets are his'
#15 - being in labour doesnt commence at conception, it commences on…  [+] (4 new replies) 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
User avatar #54 - theincorrigibleone (10/16/2013) [-]
I didn't mean from the moment of conception...
I mean that from the time labor started, to the time the baby is delivered, she was in labor. Minorian said that he didn't leave during labor because she went into labor at work. I was just explaining that it continued on until Holly popped out of her vag. Get it?
User avatar #202 - minorian (10/18/2013) [-]
So, what is your point? He finished the deal, but he never physically left her, since he was never there.
User avatar #16 - noideawhatimdoing (10/16/2013) [-]
Hi there, i havnt seen this episode yet.
BUT a woman goes "into labour" once she starts having contractions, her water breaks, etc. Some women are in labour for days without being actually giving birth.
My mom with my brother was in labour for 3 days before they induced her.
#17 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
true say i guess
#14 - Picture 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
#95 - ikr on a real though its similar to jessie j saying i… 10/16/2013 on Apple's Graphical User... 0
#13 - allow me to pointn out exactly why youa re an asshat. …  [+] (22 new replies) 10/16/2013 on Amazing Father! 0
#117 - pedrophile (10/16/2013) [-]
This would be a really good copypasta
But seriously what if everyone did what the douche in the post did, no body would give a fuck. There are rules for a reason...
#87 - atsshole (10/16/2013) [-]
Yes, I see your POINTN.
#35 - infinitereaper (10/16/2013) [-]
YEAH, but if there was floods why didn't he swim home?
User avatar #33 - chryssis (10/16/2013) [-]
>implying even half the shit you just said was mentioned in the post
User avatar #115 - garymotherfinoak (10/16/2013) [-]
its what happened in the actual situation though
User avatar #193 - chryssis (10/17/2013) [-]
"allow me to pointn out exactly why youa re an asshat."
I dont see a reason to call someone that when the only information given to him is none of what craigdavid used to prove him wrong. If the only information he had to go off of was what was in the post, then how can you insult him for not knowing more?
"fucking dickweed trying to ruin someones rep for no reason"
I dont think he's trying to 'ruin someones rep for no reason' at all. Rather, I think slackerbro is just looking past the 'hohmaigawd best dad 2013'.
#198 - craigdavid (10/17/2013) [-]
be quiet i like getting angry on the internet let me have this faggot
User avatar #199 - chryssis (10/17/2013) [-]
He got fucked by it though.
#203 - craigdavid (10/18/2013) [-]
onoes, now little timmy wont have thumbs for xmas :'(
User avatar #204 - chryssis (10/18/2013) [-]
Okay
User avatar #26 - crampers (10/16/2013) [-]
Such is the damage of the uninformed.
#18 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
Allow me to point out why I'm not:
Quote the image: "left his porsche stuck in traffic"
That's not parking it in a carpark, that's not even being stuck in traffic; since he could actually park it somewhere.
Obviously you've never been stuck in traffic on a highway in Belgium, where there's really nowhere to go then.
So screw you and OP for giving a really bad description.
#20 - ownubycake (10/16/2013) [-]
No
#19 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
i've read the fucking book that he wrote this story in, about tellin gme where he can and cant park

also guess what, HE WASNT ON THE FUCKING BELGIAN HIGHWAY
#22 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
Well guess what buddy,
- I didn't know this anecdote was documented in a book.
- I don't give a shit about the above, I was commenting about the data that was given in the pic, which says he left his car in traffic, meaning on the fucking road, like a dick.
- No shit Sherlock, if he had been, the pic should have said he fucking SWAM to his little girl.

In short, if you had just pointed out in a civilized manner that he parked his car somewhere, we would have been good. As it happened, you're the asshat here.
#25 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
also fuck you on abotu civilised manner

your intiial comment was calling someone an asshole for leaving their car in traffic jam. not civilised thoguhts to me

fuck you even spelt civilised wrong, but i suppose being in murrica you dont know much about civilisation do you
User avatar #31 - abotu (10/16/2013) [-]
for the record, in America we spell it civilization. Not a misspelling, simply a cultural difference
#24 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
maybe you should have fucking googled it before you started slagging someone over somethingyou had only just read in .JPG IMAGE ON FUNNYJUNK

like seriously where was the logic in havinga go at him anyway?
if the traffic was bad enough that he was willing to abandon his car odds on noone in front of or behind him was going anywhere any time soon either. plus there the fact he could just pay a guy fifty quid to pick his car up or suttin

GOOD JOB YOU LOOK INTELLIGENT AS FUCK RIGHT NOW DONTCHA?
#27 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
- If it happened like that, he would have been an selfish prick, so accusing such a person of being "an asshole" would be justified.
- I have seen it happen before.
- www.thefreedictionary.com/civilized
(I thought you were a native speaker?! Seeing as I referenced Belgian highways, were do you think I'm from chap?)
- Why would I put any effort in looking up a story where someone is being an asshole, but gets praised for it?

Now read your last sentence again.
#28 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
cbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa you arent murrfican so you arent trollable :'(
#29 - slackerbro (10/16/2013) [-]
"murrFican" ?

No, I'm afraid not, however smurfs are originally from my country...
#116 - garymotherfinoak has deleted their comment.
#3 - naw, liftin **** with the reddit lingo etc is not cool 10/14/2013 on Marty! We've got to go back! 0
#93 - yep  [+] (2 new replies) 10/14/2013 on Apple's Graphical User... 0
#94 - mrmamric (10/14/2013) [-]
Cute.
#95 - craigdavid (10/16/2013) [-]
ikr

on a real though its similar to jessie j saying its not about the money, if an artist claims they do stuff for the fans, they have no right to bitch about torrenting, illegal downloading etc

if they came out straight and just went yeah i want my fucking cash id have respect for that. id still torrent their music if i wanted it but id feel innocent for a different reason
#11 - when was this 10/14/2013 on Snibety Snab! XDDd 0
#5 - point taken 10/13/2013 on Windmill 0
#91 - you kinda missed my point there, if i took her twin to the bas… 10/13/2013 on Apple's Graphical User... 0
#89 - IF i bought the game which i would not have done …  [+] (2 new replies) 10/13/2013 on Apple's Graphical User... 0
User avatar #90 - lemonsixx (10/13/2013) [-]
No but if you ended up just taking her twin and keeping her locked in your basement that would be kidnapping. You couldn't just be like "OI! But th' 'riginals right bluddy there!" theyd still be like, "Yæh bro, your buttholes gonna be relentlessly mashed in prison."
#91 - craigdavid (10/13/2013) [-]
you kinda missed my point there, if i took her twin to the basement itd be mroe akin to kidnapping than theft

Comments(0):

 

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
No comments!
 Friends (0)