And you're allowed that opinion. I think its tone shows a lack of understanding of our historical involvement in the region.

France also struck an accord, in 1776.

France also struck an accord, in 1776

France also struck an accord.

**iwantbananaslol used "*roll picture*"**
**iwantbananaslol rolled image**

ooh i know right?

lock was definitely the worst though
lmao i hated it when coaches decided to see how good of a player i am with my head up someones ass and fondling their junk

hey no problem man

also rugby? thats great news that means you're already familiar with the hard work it takes to achieve and that's sometimes half the battle


--say which position were you?
[i was a flanker all the way - loved dem 6s and 7s]

Tight head prop. No.3. All the work and none of the glory!

ooh i know right?

lock was definitely the worst though
lmao i hated it when coaches decided to see how good of a player i am with my head up someones ass and fondling their junk

for sure chumbles

and dont be surprised if this gets to be a multiple message response


now first things first a little bit about myself:
---i burn energy like crazy (least i did when i was young) and i'm used to losing mondo weight over the course of a few weeks.....so i get impatient sometimes and do "drastic" things like legitimately starving myself all day and doing full workouts anyway and then coming home and having a small amount of food.........
......i.e. there are parts of my philosophy that take things to extremes, so if you're looking for a nice light slow routine that will eventually help you lose like 20 pounds over a 5 year period, then you might wanna take my advice cautiously because i'm not someone who is okay with waiting that long and it likely reflects in my advice
---------nevertheless, i also cannot lie because putting yourself in an actual starvation mode AND busting your ass burns shit faster than you ever thought possible
---but i'm pretty positive thats not what you're looking to do and, even if it was, you definitely don't want to throw down a complete lifestyle change all at once or you'll die of heart attack
...................so again, Caution...

....anyway sorry i just feel like it had to be said


right cool so onto the big ones
throwin down a quick outline, I'm gonna list these in order of importance, but the reverse order will most likely be the sequence you follow each of these; just keep that in mind when i drop some wisdom about mental discipline, diet, and work routines

kay so imma start with perhaps the most ridiculous sounding but without a doubt the most useful

mental discipline:
--now i've already mentioned most of this in the previous reply which is good although first off i must reiterate it - you can do it; but only if you're persistent

--but there are far more crucial things even than that, and the first is that you need a way to get through your workouts
------my girlfriend has been telling me for weeks that its all about "finding an activity that you actually enjoy doing" ...and that's sweet and all but at the end of the day when you're exhausted and choosing between plopping on the couch and doing another thing you 'like to do' but happens to be more work......i mean seriously what would you choose? i mean it sure doesn't look like that philosophy's doin as much for her as mine is for me :/ ....
------------for me personally, i work much better with my voice in the back of my head reminding me of the reasons i started working out in the first place for me this has currently been the horror of not fitting into the only nice clothes i can ever afford. seriously i literally have my pants and old jeans splayed out in my kitchen as a reminder for when i walk to the fridge [i.e. when i can finally fit inside these clothes that i was literally wearing a year ago, THEN i have earned the right to eat seconds.........that's just me of course. for you i imagine this would manifest as your wife's inner thoughts every time you choose sloth over health...or.....far more effective probably is the thought of your potential children's faces at their fathers funeral .........it's all about motivation man

..............damn i thought i could finish this section before the characters ran out but looks like we'll have to parse this inconveniently...........

mental discipline (continued)
:
--so far in the first comment we've covered drive and motivation, but there is one last part of discipline that is supernatural/fantasy/bullshit to those i try to tell it to. While i will most certainly point out that mental control of one's body is ENTIRELY possible (surely you are aware of the monks that lit themselves on fire? there are plenty of other examples of course, but i think i'm already talking an assload dont you? ) .....i can nevertheless only ask that you keep an open mind
------because the final point of this section is that you can actually control your body - but only as much as you believe it can
--you see i'm a chemist, chumbles, and a good one at that. i know (and now you know) that the process of burning lipids/fat starts with transporting them to the mitochondria, and your body does the rest
------and guess the fuck what
------if you take deep breaths - the kind that prepare yourself for a talk with the one entity that literally runs your whole fucking life........if you humble and steel yourself before all the institutes organs and factory workers cells/bacteria that are responsible for your life being an ecstatic paradise or a living hell........then you will find yourself in touch with the life that makes you you

--i was probably unclear here, so let me explicitly say you need to learn to meditate if you haven't already......it centers your mind within your body in much the same way a warrior-king was centered in their throne overlooking the battlefield
------you do that, and then all you need to do is ask politely (but commandingly) that the workers under your employ do what they're told --- you close your eyes [if necessary] and ask your body's fat centers to send the lipids to the mitochondria, and then you ask the mitochondria to do whatever they can to bring lipid peroxidation to a maximum as best you know how to ask them to do it.......................................
.............................and they will

--look. im not here to bullshit you or to whine about shit for attention. i know you're the only one reading this chumblefucker
--which is why for your sake i will drop a small experience in this spoiler
lil excerpt from my young college days (which is all just my account lol so dont expect any sources), but i had eaten so much fucking food after an all-you-can eat buffet, but we were all headin out that night to party it up and i knew that in order to look good i had to shrink this big fat belly...........well, did i anorexia myself and take the road well traveled? Nah man. I found my center, felt the connections between my mind, my heart, and my body, and politely but firmly asked it to forward more gastric acid to the stomach in order to flatten that belly. .....this was the first time i had attempted a physiological change from my mind, and I was unsure enough that I asked several times again after that because I wasn't sure if it would work. Well Chumbles it wasn't 20 minutes later that i was in the back seat clenching my arms around my stomach because i had some mad indigestion felt like it was burning a hole in my belly.........then of course in the pain i immediately asked it to hold back on the gastric acid and it cleared up within 5 minutes......coincidence? shit man i'm just some dude on the internet you believe what you want
--but in the end you just have to try it for yourself. don't even thank me or any shit. just learn to control yourself and you will be master of far more things than something as trivial as weight


--but perhaps i'm embellishing too much. you're probably a smart guy. maybe you'll even figure all this out yourself
------in which case i can sum this all up as 110% focus
....yeah its a bullshit term, but the extra 10% comes from the time you spend thinking of other ways to do it

so do it man

*sigh* there are more things i could say from the psych perspective but i'm starting to feel the drink now so let me finish this before i become completely incoherent



diet:

--actually this first point segues kinda perfectly in here because....i was talkin bout using your body to control metabolism right?
------well here's another neat thing about biochemistry, the Citric Acid Cycle [crucial to metabolism itself, which is an indirect way of activating lipid peroxidation] will be forwarded along according to Le Chatelier's princip.....oh right you probably don't care. Umm basically you add more of something that is an input of the cycle, and the cycle itself (and all parts inherent) will work harder to use that excess and jumpstart procedure
------this is why it is good to begin the morning with a shot of citric acid/lemon juice - because it kickstarts that metabolism
------------now as it turns out, acetic acid (vinegar) is also a big part of the citric acid cycle and personally i can attest that a shot of vinegar in the morning is more than enough to also kickstart that metabolism in full gear before you even head to work

--moving on...........i.........umm....look Chumbles, I'm not here to list you off all the low-calorie substitutes and recommended ideas okay? as I mentioned from the outset, i only employ things that i know work for weightloss. so rather than mention all the bullshit little crap trends you can be a part of for a week until you realize they dont actually do anything, I will offer the one dietary implement i've found effective:
mutha fuckin soup
............seriously you either grab from the pantry or go out and buy a giant vat for making soup
.......and you soup it up
and follow the two rules:
----(1) if there is soup, you only eat soup
----(2) if there is not soup, you make more
............now there are a couple other simple smart things you ought to do like making sure it's thin and dilute soup, but not so thin that its not full of nutrients

....lemme put it this way, for a 5 gallon vat of soup, you need only put 2 cans of (vegetable of choice) personally i like the corn and green beans , a single slab of some type of meat/fish/tofu, and then add your favorite seasonings and maybe some garlic and an onion if you're feeling fancy....................add water for the rest, cap that shit, and put it on the stove on the absolute lowest heat setting
...................and then you wait for a good 6-7 hours
> yes i said 7 hours because for one thing if it takes longer to cook, that's that much more time you spend NOT eating, which is that much more time spent not getting fatter
>> and uh.... well dude. have you ever had meat that has been exposed to light heat and fluids for long enough to cook it thoroughly? BEST SHIT EVER it truly is the only worthwhile way to eat beef while on a diet
------oh and did i mention? with this recipe you not only have some delicious shit [assuming you seasoned it to your own personal tastes], but it is an incredibly nutrient-rich and full-meal-providing dish
------the point being that you only need one or two bowls of soup a day to replenish the strength from a full day's workout



--okay last point on diets
--this is fairly recent actually .....ooh id love to tell the long version but its getting late
------suffice it to say, my asshole grandma tried to kill me with a batch of 99% death-spice peppers [and i mean she knows i dont eat ass-burn spicy shit every fucking meal wtf grandma why would you send this shit?]...............anyway i found myself with an accidental plethora of ingredients so incredibly spicy that i couldn't eat more than 2 bites per hour
--saw the opportunity and took it

--hey man if your food too spicy to eat more than 4 bites a night, you gon lose weight
[my pants are already too loose for the current setting on my belt]

alright finally we're on the home stretch and let's hope its a quickie. ladies and Chumblefucker, i present:

work routines:

--now i know you know i can't pass up goin back to the mind-over-body thing, so the first and perhaps best advice i can give you here is............abs
------yes, abs
--brace yourself for another anecdote, because i have always had ripped abs despite almost never being skinny enough to actually see them and keep in mind everybody has abs and others often think super skinny are people are ripped just because they're visible....but strengthened abs are another story........and while i have you here i might as well also mention that when the body is burning fat, it is far more likely to burn fat from the nearest source than any other place...............i.e. if you want to burn belly fat, you got to work them abs
--so uhh..........well this actually leads into the real advice here okay because as i said before you gotta do whatever you can....and if you're as sedentary as you say, then you may not have the ability to follow the workout advice below this and so your best bet might be to just do as good of these seemingly insignificant daily exercises as you can
..........anyway i uhh...fuck i never finished that point did i? i used to not work abs at all and when i finally started (high school) i realized it was easy as shit because i was working them the whole time
--look Chumbs, long story short, there are two major things you should be doing as much as you can and as intensely [within reason] as you can:
------(1) laughing
------(2) sucking in your gut for pretty ladies
.....okay i get it right? #2 is more or less meaningless if you're in a loving marriage, but just pretend you're still dating, and that you're trying your hardest to look your best to be as sexy as you can for the woman you love.............whatever it takes for you to do it, i can promise you that if you suck in your gut and flex your abs to 'keep it in', you will....well, obviously, work them abs and that is one of the first steps
and the laughter thing should go without saying. you laugh, your belly muscles expand. its basic physiology


--so that was a nice paragraph on things you can (and should) do at work, at home, and everywhere else......but if you recall i had mentioned at the beginning that the last step is likely the first you will [and should] do
--namely, the gym is where it starts, Chumbley
------I dunno where you live, but if it's not life-threatening heart-attack or otherwise to walk to the gym, then you best start with that
------because once you can finally make it all the way to the gym and back without dying, guess the fuck what? U can LIFT
--bullshit aside, lifting builds muscle AND requires work
------the more you go to the gym and do any form of workout, the more muscle you build
------and those muscle babies need to suckle on energy
[i.e. the more muscle you're currently building, the more fat you'll burn when you do do your workouts\']

now look chumbles im not a health instructor, nor am i up-to-date on all these new-fangled workout routines
--i went to gyms from 6th grade into college so i know my shit, but if you want in-detail ways to work out certain muscles you'll have to request another reply [lol i promise it wont be 4 messages long]

but what i will say is you gotta do both


lift weights AND do cardio
--you get in there all psyched and you pump some mad iron with all the energy your body has stored over the years. its fucking there man - don't ever think your fat is waste because its some primo energy store just waitin to be busted
--you pump that shit out until you're almost tired, and then you hit that treadmill for ........well in this scenario, you should also have walked there, so just hit it for like 10 minutes at full speed

point is you do gotta do all workouts you possibly can afford
each muscle = less fat

*sigh*........what a night

dunno what kinda person you is chumbee, but i hope you understand that the type of person i am is someone who will spend 3 hours of their night which is my whole night actually, as i need to wake at 5am tomorrow writing out all these things they know just to offer some help

and i dont even fucking know you


my last bit of advice is to never forget that
never forget that you are an adult who is not a total write-off to society
which means you have responsibilities to all the people who believe that you have the potential to be something greater and to make the world a better place -- people who would gladly give 3-4 hours of their life if it meant even the possibility of helping keep you on the right track, because the world doesn't need another dead person and it damn sure doesn't need another selfish fatass
--it needs people who are willing to give a damn
--people willing to step up to make those personal sacrifices for their species, their families, and themselves
--people like i assume you to be, chumblefucker


life is fucking hard. its supposed to be
only through pain can we understand happiness
> embrace the opportunity to feel discomforted, because it means you're imperfect enough to experience growth
> embrace the burn as you power through weakness every day, because it means you still have the opportunity to feel strong


the best part?

you know this
because you're one of us. you belong in the world of hard-workers and disciplined achievers
and we will always believe in you

Anonymousdonor, thank you so much for spending the time to write that all out. It does make sense and it is a fantastic help.

I know what caused my fatness, I used to play rugby at a relatively good level, training sessions three times a week and a match on Sunday's with gym sessions in between. I wanted to join the forces after university I had it all planned man. I ended up a twisted wreck at the bottom of a scrum and ruined my back and neck. This put me out of action for a year while it healed. Problem was I kept eating like I was before and the weight piled on and the muscle disappeared. Rather quickly to be honest. I then found a lump on my balls and that was another chunk of time out of playing. Before I knew it I was too unfit to really start playing, my gf at the time left me and all confidence was blown. I ate. And ate. And ate.

I know that did this to myself and the only way I'm going to change is by sheer bloody effort. Having the kind words that you and many others have said is a great inspiration. It makes me genuinely believe it is d Able. Hard work and a lengthy process but doable, and totally worth it.

Thanks again dude. Appreciate it more than you realise. Goes to you all who have posted.

hey no problem man

also rugby? thats great news that means you're already familiar with the hard work it takes to achieve and that's sometimes half the battle


--say which position were you?
[i was a flanker all the way - loved dem 6s and 7s]

Tight head prop. No.3. All the work and none of the glory!

ooh i know right?

lock was definitely the worst though
lmao i hated it when coaches decided to see how good of a player i am with my head up someones ass and fondling their junk