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captainpatters

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Steam Profile: Captain_Patters
Consoles Owned: PC Gaming mustard race
Interests: Catching criminal scum, praising the empire/emperor
Date Signed Up:12/16/2011
Last Login:2/20/2015
Location:Kent
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#7444
Comment Ranking:#23004
Highest Content Rank:#335
Highest Comment Rank:#1059
Content Thumbs: 15314 total,  17253 ,  1939
Comment Thumbs: 7454 total,  8567 ,  1113
Content Level Progress: 23.8% (238/1000)
Level 213 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 214 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 54% (54/100)
Level 264 Comments: Pure Win → Level 265 Comments: Pure Win
Subscribers:3
Content Views:940378
Times Content Favorited:627 times
Total Comments Made:953
FJ Points:19699
Favorite Tags: Polandball (6) | War (4) | Big (3) | i (3) | and (2) | butts (2) | eu (2) | hairyball (2) | in (2) | meaty (2) | russia (2) | sweatyball (2) | sweatyballs (2) | ukraine (2) | usa (2)
Big butts

latest user's comments

#89 - You are not British until you have had a picnic in the rain 01/11/2014 on Canada +1
#85 - I'm gonna make my own polandball OC..... Because.... yea... 01/11/2014 on Canada +1
#84 - I remember when it snowed for 3 days in May. Good times 01/11/2014 on Canada +1
#6 - Scoreboard! 01/11/2014 on 7 Years War: World War 0 +5
#4 - Normally I'd ******* rage over that american park… 01/10/2014 on Queue crying Native American -1
#17 - Prepare yer butts for the best speach ever made 01/07/2014 on Einstein 0
#3 - Comment deleted 01/02/2014 on What a deal 0
#26 - Picture 01/02/2014 on eggs are the best +1
#54 - The Amount of % off is more important to me then the game itse… 01/02/2014 on Now steam sales are nearing... +3
#7264511 - All you had to do is ask 12/30/2013 on Autism Board 0
#119 - Sorry bud 12/30/2013 on Just thought you should know 0
#3 - medieval war 2 is best. Rome 2 is an an absolute…  [+] (6 new replies) 12/30/2013 on But I like Civ +2
User avatar #16 - ACanadian (12/30/2013) [-]
I enjoy all of the Total war games, except for Shogun 1 and Med 1 cause I never played them, but Med II gets me angry so quickly cause of the horrible AI during an assault on cities/castles. When I tell my infantry to attack something I want the entire unit to attack, not just send in men piece meal to get slaughtered by the enemy that should have no chance of winning. The AI during open battles is great though.

Same with Empire, open terrain the AI is great, but as soon as I assault a city or fort suddenly my troops forget how to climb a wall or somehow get half the unit on the wall and the other half milling around on the ground like assholes.

I enjoyed Rome II, but the problem with that was that all I had to do was just mass up all my hoplites and pikemen together in one fuck huge group and nothing could beat me. At least in assaults, there was once where I was almost beaten during an field battle, but that's cause there were 3 half-armies coming at me
#14 - beerholder (12/30/2013) [-]
I played M2 the longest, but Rome 2 is getting better with every patch. Shogun 2 was the best in terms of gameplay mechanics.
User avatar #13 - cocoman (12/30/2013) [-]
I liked medII the least, I just can't figure out how the religion system works! Every campaign I start is fucked within 50 turns because all of Europe turns against me.
Personally I like Shogun 2 overall the most, and Napoleon for its fast paced action.
#33 - anonexplains (12/30/2013) [-]
I'm assuming you played as a catholic faction and flipped the bird to the Pope, not a smart move.
#37 - anonexplains (12/30/2013) [-]
^ what he said

Before doing anything else you should send your starting diplomat to Rome (greeting everyone on the way there) and kiss the pope's ass. Also, keep that diplomat near Rome. Once you've got an alliance (and high relations) with the papal states the game becomes much easier because anyone christian attacking you will become excommunicated quickly, allowing you to crusade against them. And if things go south you can always gift the pope an undefendable/useless/freshly conquered border-settlement as a buffer (and he will love you for it)
User avatar #6 - tormain (12/30/2013) [-]
Agreed. The Scottish never survive long.
#99 - **captainpatters rolls 488** 12/30/2013 on God 0
#98 - Comment deleted 12/30/2013 on God 0
#115 - 1/1 British... Damn European ethnicities 12/30/2013 on a truer post has never been... 0
#104 - Free everything you could imagine. Tv s…  [+] (5 new replies) 12/30/2013 on Just thought you should know +4
User avatar #113 - alphagex (12/30/2013) [-]
not falling that for a third time, the second time my friend told me to go to wowgold.com
#112 - thegamegestapo (12/30/2013) [-]
#109 - mcderper (12/30/2013) [-]
#105 - wanicochil (12/30/2013) [-]
I actually opened the link then it hit me like a ton of bricks what it actually what, then quickly closed it before the tab loaded
User avatar #119 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
Sorry bud
#56 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... -1
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#55 - Picture  [+] (2 new replies) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... -1
#56 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#54 - Picture  [+] (3 new replies) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... -1
#55 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#56 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#53 - Picture  [+] (4 new replies) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... -1
#54 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#55 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#56 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#52 - Picture  [+] (5 new replies) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... 0
#53 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#54 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#55 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#56 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#51 - Picture  [+] (6 new replies) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... -1
#52 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#53 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#54 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#55 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#56 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#50 - behold. My barrage of jawntwan gifs  [+] (7 new replies) 12/30/2013 on You must suffer for your... 0
#51 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#52 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#53 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#54 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#55 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#56 - captainpatters (12/30/2013) [-]
#67 - TexMex (12/30/2013) [-]
My favorite
#144 - >Not posting in ************* 12/30/2013 on josh peck +8
#3 - handles is best companion  [+] (2 new replies) 12/28/2013 on leviOsa +12
#4 - emberstar (12/28/2013) [-]
He was definitely the longest one that was around (300 years of so), but River was pretty bad ass.
User avatar #5 - emberstar (12/28/2013) [-]
*or

items

Total unique items point value: 2050 / Total items point value: 2050
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#19 - evilhomer ONLINE (06/23/2014) [-]
User avatar #20 to #19 - captainpatters (06/23/2014) [-]
You are doing gods work
User avatar #17 - hornack (12/22/2013) [-]
Hey I was wondering if you had use of your fj points.
User avatar #18 to #17 - captainpatters (12/22/2013) [-]
No, but they're mine
#2 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #3 to #2 - captainpatters (08/15/2013) [-]
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooo
#4 to #3 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #6 to #4 - captainpatters (08/15/2013) [-]
Surrender to what? I don't think you can do anything that I would give two ***** about
#10 to #6 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #11 to #10 - captainpatters (08/15/2013) [-]
Okay, the fact that somebody cared enough about me to try and bring me down. Thanks
#12 to #11 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #13 to #12 - captainpatters (08/15/2013) [-]
I thought you were going. My grammatical abilities aren't what you would call good, at all.
#14 to #13 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #15 to #14 - captainpatters (08/15/2013) [-]
AH yes, 23 red thumbs really set me straight. I'm rolling on the floor in tears, I submit to your epic le trolling skills.
#16 to #15 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#7 to #6 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #8 to #7 - captainpatters (08/15/2013) [-]
I hope you like the taste of casual racism because that's all my soul is.
#9 to #8 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#5 to #4 - captianpaters **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#1 - helpmeplz has deleted their comment [-]
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