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captainfuckitall    

Rank #295 on Comments
captainfuckitall Avatar Level 348 Comments: Sold Soul
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Date Signed Up:4/12/2010
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#295
Highest Content Rank:#10530
Highest Comment Rank:#49
Content Thumbs: 34 total,  90 ,  56
Comment Thumbs: 52069 total,  63622 ,  11553
Content Level Progress: 66.1% (39/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 38.6% (386/1000)
Level 348 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 349 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:21
Content Views:9728
Times Content Favorited:12 times
Total Comments Made:15223
FJ Points:20611

latest user's comments

#25 - I feel ashamed that I recognize this hentai 10/31/2014 on Doors Closed 0
#32 - "HEY, YOU GUYS GOTTA LISTEN TO ME AND READ THIS, BUT I DO…  [+] (5 new replies) 10/31/2014 on I'm Ready for the Hate +37
User avatar #86 - tomahawkkit (11/01/2014) [-]
who to say that this argument cant be used for extremists on both sides?
User avatar #87 - captainfuckitall (11/01/2014) [-]
That's what I'm saying.
User avatar #88 - tomahawkkit (11/01/2014) [-]
can you phrase your point into three lines? it seems to me that you think the author wasn't already aware
User avatar #92 - captainfuckitall (11/01/2014) [-]
It didn't seem like she was.

My point regarding her post is this:
The exact same argument she uses against men/sexism (in this comic) could be easily turned against Feminists. No words even require changing, just visualizing the different thing represents the entire argument differently.

My point regarding Feminism is this: You cannot demand that others respect you as an adult and then protect you as if you were a child. For every right you gain comes a responsibility required to keep it.
User avatar #97 - tomahawkkit (11/03/2014) [-]
that really only applies to American feminists. and American feminists to feminism is like the westboro church to cristianity
#9 - That's not the problem. Wanna know what the problem is? Everyo…  [+] (1 new reply) 10/31/2014 on The Problem +13
#52 - wimwam (10/31/2014) [-]
This OP.
#6 - Comment #5 10/31/2014 on Privilege 0
#5 - My sister who's a straight A student couldn't get into the col… 10/31/2014 on Privilege +20
#47 - I don't give a **** what it references. There hav… 10/31/2014 on Motivation 0
#38 - R u fukin srs, m8? In each of the games Altair appear…  [+] (2 new replies) 10/31/2014 on Motivation 0
User avatar #42 - Crusader (10/31/2014) [-]
I don't know what games you're talking about, since this post only references the main console AAA yaddi yadda games.

AC1 - Altair is going for Honour
ACII - Altair's scene is literally him chasing tail
AC Revelations - Is him seeking peace, but for the most part he's trying to regain the Honor for the Order, since it's gotten a wee bit shady.

Now Ezio
ACII - Revenge
Brotherhood - Justice
Revelations - Truth/Answers/Knowledge, whatever you want to call it, his objective wasn't Justice. If it was Justice then the game would have been as simple as "Make sure the right guy becomes King, hand control over to one of my minions, back to Italy in time to fight the Chinese and have a heart attack" but no, his entire purpose was to find the Keys to the Library in hopes of discovering the meaning behinds Juno and Minerva's prophecies and find out who the hell Desmond is. If that's not seeking answers, I don't know what is.
User avatar #47 - captainfuckitall (10/31/2014) [-]
I don't give a shit what it references. There have been more Assassin's Creed games than what appear on console, which are the games I'm referring too. Whether you want to include them or not, they were there, and if Ezio gets three, Altair should get three as he was IN three.

I also really enjoy how you're trying so hard to squish Altairs motivations together despite the fact that he spent the majority of his life looking into the Apple in search FOR said truths, yet are willing to cut hairs when it comes to the differences of Justice and Revenge and why they're so different as to deserve entirely different games/motivational plots.

And to...what? The whole reason he was CONCERNED about it in the first place was because he wanted to know the end-game. He didn't care what happened in between or why, he just wanted to know if "Good guys win, bad guys lose".
#37 - But he used his wealth in order to accumulate MORE power and a… 10/31/2014 on Motivation 0
#32 - That's only during the first act. After he matures and journey… 10/31/2014 on Motivation 0
#24 - It's fine, don't copy and paste; original letters and messages… 10/31/2014 on Stephen Colbert on Gamergate 0
#12 - And the same could be said about non-binary people before they…  [+] (1 new reply) 10/31/2014 on The first one is a troll BTW. 0
#13 - hudge (10/31/2014) [-]
What's wrong with covering yourself in peanut butter and having a midget slap you while you eat smarties off of hookers?

I swear, I'm so triggered right now.
#10 - It would be totally fine if it just stayed there. I don't give…  [+] (3 new replies) 10/31/2014 on The first one is a troll BTW. 0
#11 - hudge (10/31/2014) [-]
Demanding special treatment? Nigga thinks he's a fridge, he ain't gettin' shit.
User avatar #12 - captainfuckitall (10/31/2014) [-]
And the same could be said about non-binary people before they came out in 'protest' of gendered bathrooms, requiring many universities in Vancouver alone to change the layouts.

It's not just about him, but anyone who's just generally a freak and never learned to keep it to themselves. Again, I couldn't give less of a shit if you covered yourself in penut butter and had a midget slap you while you ate smarties off of hookers, just as long as you don't tell me about it or show me.
#13 - hudge (10/31/2014) [-]
What's wrong with covering yourself in peanut butter and having a midget slap you while you eat smarties off of hookers?

I swear, I'm so triggered right now.
#11 - I don't know, Deadpool; maybe if you didn't go out of your way…  [+] (2 new replies) 10/31/2014 on Feelpool 0
User avatar #18 - dagold (10/31/2014) [-]
I'm not an expert on deadpool, so if one comes along to correct me I welcome it.

Deadpool is being driven mad over and over again by the same cancer that has his entire body all fucked up. His body keeps regenerating and he gains sweet, blissful moments of clarity where he gets to be a human being for just a little while before the cancer spreads again and he descends back into madness.
User avatar #24 - iamkagji (10/31/2014) [-]
That's correct, good on you
#20 - Actually it goes "Truth" (Altair), "Justice&quo…  [+] (8 new replies) 10/31/2014 on Motivation 0
#36 - brickguy (10/31/2014) [-]
(Edward) Fortune, I think
User avatar #37 - captainfuckitall (10/31/2014) [-]
But he used his wealth in order to accumulate MORE power and authority, which was his real goal. He's probably the most authoritarian pirate video-games have to offer.
User avatar #35 - Crusader (10/31/2014) [-]
Not really, Ezio had three different full stories. And his goals were different in each one.

He didn't want justice to be served upon Rodrigo, he wanted Revenge.
And he didn't want Justice while trying to open Altair's Library, he wanted answers.

Altair was more or less the same story, just stretched throughout a full game and then mini-games in with Ezio's story.
User avatar #38 - captainfuckitall (10/31/2014) [-]
R u fukin srs, m8?

In each of the games Altair appeared in, his motivations were different: In the (canonically) first he wanted honour, in the second he wanted truth, and in the third he wanted peace (and even in the flashbacks he wished for the development and growth of his creed and affiliation), but at the base of it all was that same desire for truth (at least as he matured). In each of the different games, Ezio wants different things, but it all ties back to an innate desire to find those who do wrong and punish them, even his search for Altair's Chronicles were in order to fulfill this objective.
User avatar #42 - Crusader (10/31/2014) [-]
I don't know what games you're talking about, since this post only references the main console AAA yaddi yadda games.

AC1 - Altair is going for Honour
ACII - Altair's scene is literally him chasing tail
AC Revelations - Is him seeking peace, but for the most part he's trying to regain the Honor for the Order, since it's gotten a wee bit shady.

Now Ezio
ACII - Revenge
Brotherhood - Justice
Revelations - Truth/Answers/Knowledge, whatever you want to call it, his objective wasn't Justice. If it was Justice then the game would have been as simple as "Make sure the right guy becomes King, hand control over to one of my minions, back to Italy in time to fight the Chinese and have a heart attack" but no, his entire purpose was to find the Keys to the Library in hopes of discovering the meaning behinds Juno and Minerva's prophecies and find out who the hell Desmond is. If that's not seeking answers, I don't know what is.
User avatar #47 - captainfuckitall (10/31/2014) [-]
I don't give a shit what it references. There have been more Assassin's Creed games than what appear on console, which are the games I'm referring too. Whether you want to include them or not, they were there, and if Ezio gets three, Altair should get three as he was IN three.

I also really enjoy how you're trying so hard to squish Altairs motivations together despite the fact that he spent the majority of his life looking into the Apple in search FOR said truths, yet are willing to cut hairs when it comes to the differences of Justice and Revenge and why they're so different as to deserve entirely different games/motivational plots.

And to...what? The whole reason he was CONCERNED about it in the first place was because he wanted to know the end-game. He didn't care what happened in between or why, he just wanted to know if "Good guys win, bad guys lose".
#27 - Womens Study Major (10/31/2014) [-]
Arno's looking for redemption.
User avatar #32 - captainfuckitall (10/31/2014) [-]
That's only during the first act. After he matures and journey's a bit, he stops caring about his rank and what people think of him and only cares about finding the reasons why things are the way they are; this also shows in many flashbacks where, even after he becomes master of the order, he is far more concerned with knowledge and answers than he ever was about old ideals or grudges.
#7 - Except half of this is wrong in the first place. Hitler wasn't…  [+] (2 new replies) 10/30/2014 on Hitler +8
#27 - thescyle (10/30/2014) [-]
you forgot the most important point: he did nothing wrong
#10 - Womens Study Major (10/30/2014) [-]
Also, there were about 150000 Jews in Hitler's army.

www.rense.com/general43/jewserved.htm
#70 - But that's copyrighted material, you have to pay to receive th…  [+] (1 new reply) 10/30/2014 on I Literally Can't Breathe +4
User avatar #71 - metacobalion (10/30/2014) [-]
I know that but I was hoping to get thumbs by referencing something a lot of people know about
#384 - Doesn't Mexico have a vastly different culture from the rest o…  [+] (1 new reply) 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
User avatar #389 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
well you didn't single out hispanics so it's only natural to think mexico was included. look my point is that it has to do with how educated people are in a specific area. you are stereotyping because i am sure hispanics with decent education are not culturally illiterate
#379 - Ah, yes, El Salvador, third largest economy in South America. …  [+] (3 new replies) 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
User avatar #383 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
I lived in mexico. i have a sister, a mother and female friends. i know what i'm saying.
Also, i don't think el salvador has the third largest economy in south america. central america, maybe.
User avatar #384 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
Doesn't Mexico have a vastly different culture from the rest of South america evidenced by the fact that everyone gets extremely offended when you confuse the two? Oh well, so it's one person's opinion against another's, I still have my own experiences, so it's still 2 against one. Find two more people to agree with you and we can go from there. Until then, buenas noches.
User avatar #389 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
well you didn't single out hispanics so it's only natural to think mexico was included. look my point is that it has to do with how educated people are in a specific area. you are stereotyping because i am sure hispanics with decent education are not culturally illiterate
#375 - Yeah I mean hispanic culture as a whole AND hoodlums in the U.…  [+] (5 new replies) 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
User avatar #378 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
Your fiance probably lived in a very impoverished place. People do not get harassed there like you think they do.
User avatar #379 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
Ah, yes, El Salvador, third largest economy in South America. Impoverished. Right, my mistake.

In any case, I suppose you're right, I should drop the opinion of someone who lived there and my own evidence and experiences I've seen all my life in favour of ANOTHER person (who probably lived there, as surely you're not so arrogant as to say these things and NOT) whom provides nothing beyond his word. Yes, totally believable.
User avatar #383 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
I lived in mexico. i have a sister, a mother and female friends. i know what i'm saying.
Also, i don't think el salvador has the third largest economy in south america. central america, maybe.
User avatar #384 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
Doesn't Mexico have a vastly different culture from the rest of South america evidenced by the fact that everyone gets extremely offended when you confuse the two? Oh well, so it's one person's opinion against another's, I still have my own experiences, so it's still 2 against one. Find two more people to agree with you and we can go from there. Until then, buenas noches.
User avatar #389 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
well you didn't single out hispanics so it's only natural to think mexico was included. look my point is that it has to do with how educated people are in a specific area. you are stereotyping because i am sure hispanics with decent education are not culturally illiterate
#372 - Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about. Near…  [+] (7 new replies) 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
User avatar #374 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
hispanic culture as a whole? i think you mean hispanic hoodlums in the US
User avatar #375 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
Yeah I mean hispanic culture as a whole AND hoodlums in the U.S. Source: My fiance is from South America and regularly dealt with real harassment and sexism while she was there, certainly not people just telling her to have a nice day.
User avatar #378 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
Your fiance probably lived in a very impoverished place. People do not get harassed there like you think they do.
User avatar #379 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
Ah, yes, El Salvador, third largest economy in South America. Impoverished. Right, my mistake.

In any case, I suppose you're right, I should drop the opinion of someone who lived there and my own evidence and experiences I've seen all my life in favour of ANOTHER person (who probably lived there, as surely you're not so arrogant as to say these things and NOT) whom provides nothing beyond his word. Yes, totally believable.
User avatar #383 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
I lived in mexico. i have a sister, a mother and female friends. i know what i'm saying.
Also, i don't think el salvador has the third largest economy in south america. central america, maybe.
User avatar #384 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
Doesn't Mexico have a vastly different culture from the rest of South america evidenced by the fact that everyone gets extremely offended when you confuse the two? Oh well, so it's one person's opinion against another's, I still have my own experiences, so it's still 2 against one. Find two more people to agree with you and we can go from there. Until then, buenas noches.
User avatar #389 - rockamekishiko (10/30/2014) [-]
well you didn't single out hispanics so it's only natural to think mexico was included. look my point is that it has to do with how educated people are in a specific area. you are stereotyping because i am sure hispanics with decent education are not culturally illiterate
#321 - Comment #219 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
#248 - Then they aren't American Eagle jeans, as in the video someone… 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
#240 - You don't seem to understand, Lord Hastur. Nobody is saying sh… 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
#219 - 1. I never said she was dressed for harassment, what I said wa… 10/30/2014 on Rude woman with scowl walks... 0
#12 - "You have no permission to put something on the internet …  [+] (5 new replies) 10/30/2014 on I Literally Can't Breathe +108
User avatar #68 - metacobalion (10/30/2014) [-]
That whole debacle with the oatmeal in a shellnut
User avatar #114 - romdomcom (10/30/2014) [-]
The oatmeal is the whole reason I'm back on FJ. I'd seen it back when it was yellow and decided to check in because he was throwing such a bitch fit. 3 years later I'm still here.
User avatar #73 - kilotech (10/30/2014) [-]
that oatmeal guy is so full of himself, it's barely funny things and a lot of jokes that existed long before he did with drawing a step above stick figures, he should be happy he's making money at all
User avatar #70 - captainfuckitall (10/30/2014) [-]
But that's copyrighted material, you have to pay to receive that; nobody has to pay to go into her blog or share anything there, nor is any of it copyrighted
User avatar #71 - metacobalion (10/30/2014) [-]
I know that but I was hoping to get thumbs by referencing something a lot of people know about

Comments(483):

[ 483 comments ]

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #490 - commencingfailure (09/30/2014) [-]
******* retard compares the IS to today's feminists. One could say ignorance is an everspreading cancer, you did your job to increase the spread.
User avatar #491 to #490 - captainfuckitall (09/30/2014) [-]
You seem REALLY mad, friend. Perhaps you should calm down and take some ass ointment before you need to see a doctor
User avatar #489 - myfourthaccount (07/18/2014) [-]
dude, you're like my most favorite person on earth right now haha
User avatar #487 - imvlad (05/04/2014) [-]
you brought shame to your house
User avatar #483 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Have you by chance had an older account here before?
User avatar #484 to #483 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Yes I have. My first username was Hiimquinn, but it was deleted for some reason I never found, so I just made another.
#485 to #484 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Oh. Never mind then. I saw someone call you Dave and I mistook you for someone else.
User avatar #486 to #485 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
It's fine. It was a joke from a picture a while back where a man was looking out the window and saw a dog and his owner walking down the street. The dog barked at another, bigger dog, and his owner just turned and said "See, this is why you have no ******* mates, Dave".
User avatar #481 - iforgotmyothername (03/20/2014) [-]
you are one cool tempered potato compared to me, bringing my fury upon your wrongness. i salute you, and thumbed up all your comments in the a capella debate.
User avatar #482 to #481 - captainfuckitall (03/20/2014) [-]
It's alright, I apologize for making you upset, but you don't need to thumb my posts up. Thumbs are a way to express positivity or negativity toward any type of comments; if you do not like them, it is perfectly within your right to thumb them down.
#480 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#479 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#478 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#477 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#476 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
User avatar #474 - aherorising (11/20/2013) [-]
you're a really cool bro
#471 - shiifter (10/06/2013) [-]
This still makes me giggle.

Oh and by the way, i never actually thumbed you down. I just said that i did.
User avatar #472 to #471 - captainfuckitall (10/06/2013) [-]
The thing is, the way I found OUT you gave me those thumbs was because of the question mark, which allows people to see who voted on content. I could only KNOW it was you if you had thumbed them down, which you did.

And now you not only prove to be an idiot, but a liar as well.
#473 to #472 - shiifter (10/12/2013) [-]
Wait? You still remembered that? That's hilarious.

By the way, i screencapped this. it's like a trophy.
User avatar #468 - satrenkotheone (09/22/2013) [-]
I would just like to say thank you.
#466 - Womens Study Major (08/25/2013) [-]
Due to your pointlessly rude comment on the post "Jesus ain't got time for **** ",

I have gone through 20 of your previous comments and thumbed them all down.

You're also a stupid, unfunny, tryhard feelfag. Exactly the kind of user that this site is infamous for.
User avatar #467 to #466 - captainfuckitall (08/25/2013) [-]
I wasn't pointlessly rude. If you read it more carefully, you would find I am not insulting your god or faith, but rather, the people who spread it about; and even they are just doing it to themselves, while I am mearly making an observation

It's ironic you call me tryhard, considering you just went through the time to thumb-down my last 20 comments as if it would have any effect on me personally or my ranking here. It's also odd you call me stupid, considering you were the one who read it uncorrectly. And I think the fact I have so many comment thumbs anyways (including my own jesus comment) speaks to the point that I am, in fact, quite hilarious. "Feelfag", is that supposed to be a derogatory term for someone who is passionate about certain things? If so, then I take pride in it, as it is only through passion that things grow.

Considering you are pretentious, arrogant, immature, and without a sense of humour; you fit the criteria for '12 year old funnyjunker' far better than I do.
#463 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.   
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.   
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.   
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
User avatar #464 to #463 - captainfuckitall (07/16/2013) [-]
You are just a wonderful person, you know that? Thank you very much for your kind words and appreciation, and I'm glad you have made an account and made many friends here, including myself
#465 to #464 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
You're welcome, good sir.
You're welcome, good sir.
User avatar #461 - potgardener (06/01/2013) [-]
youre pretty ****** in the head if beating a kid is a good idea, parents would need to hit their kids if they taught them what was right and wrong from the beginning
User avatar #462 to #461 - captainfuckitall (06/01/2013) [-]
It's ironic how you talk about avoiding situations, when your very comment isn't needed considering I already explained, about five times now, that I do not mean you must 'abuse' your children in order to get good results. My comment, and all the comments afterwards, were about how when compassion and support fails you must turn to punishment and discipline, including simply smacking your kid upside the head

Perhaps you should read more and get better informed before jumping to opinions, yes?
#459 - bossdelainternet (05/11/2013) [-]
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest  threads i've seen this year.   
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...   
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest threads i've seen this year.
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
User avatar #460 to #459 - captainfuckitall (05/11/2013) [-]
I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult

I choose the former

Thank you, good sir
#453 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
I just thought I'd let you know that I just did an awful thing and quoted your majestic deep words of death wisdom onto my facebook. I gave you credit, but as part of my shame for stealing I thought I'd tell you. That was honestly one of the best things I've ever read.

Which is also why I screencapped it. Don't worry I swear I'm not going to try to get to frontpage with it I just wanted to save it.
User avatar #454 to #453 - captainfuckitall (11/12/2012) [-]
Not at all, I am not concerned with thumbs in the least. If you would like to post it, by all means do so, if you'd like to take credit, do so as well; I care not for material value or fame, as long as comprehend and understand the message
#455 to #454 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
Oh man you just keep getting better:)    
   
But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
Oh man you just keep getting better:)

But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
#449 - captainspankmonkey (02/27/2012) [-]
Internet problems
That is why :P
User avatar #450 to #460 - captainfuckitall (02/27/2012) [-]
ahhh, haha, sorry then :P
#447 - Womens Study Major (09/26/2011) [-]
you're a lovely person
User avatar #448 to #458 - captainfuckitall (09/26/2011) [-]
awe, thank you, kind stranger :3

that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :D
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