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captainfuckitall    

Rank #610 on Comments
captainfuckitall Avatar Level 339 Comments: Practically Famous
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Personal Info
Date Signed Up:4/12/2010
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#610
Highest Content Rank:#10530
Highest Comment Rank:#49
Content Thumbs: 40 total,  90 ,  50
Comment Thumbs: 40388 total,  50026 ,  9638
Content Level Progress: 76.27% (45/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 59.9% (599/1000)
Level 339 Comments: Practically Famous → Level 340 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:20
Content Views:9578
Times Content Favorited:12 times
Total Comments Made:13156
FJ Points:11824

latest user's comments

#14 - All this did was remind me that somewhere out there, there's a… 17 hours ago on Yes. 0
#56 - >Implying I ever said I didn't 17 hours ago on Bunny is kill +1
#11 - Ew, girl cooties. No wonder you're so gay.  [+] (1 new reply) 04/22/2014 on Human behaviour +5
User avatar #12 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Hey the fact that im more intouch with women doesnt make me gay the fact that i like dicks makes me gay
#9 - Still 50% gay  [+] (3 new replies) 04/22/2014 on Human behaviour +3
User avatar #10 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Ive had four girlfriends and got in bed with one of them and her friend.
User avatar #11 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Ew, girl cooties. No wonder you're so gay.
User avatar #12 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Hey the fact that im more intouch with women doesnt make me gay the fact that i like dicks makes me gay
#7 - ***** das 50% gai  [+] (5 new replies) 04/22/2014 on Human behaviour +6
User avatar #8 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
I have three porn folders entirely of women one of which has almost 2,000 pics
User avatar #9 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Still 50% gay
User avatar #10 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Ive had four girlfriends and got in bed with one of them and her friend.
User avatar #11 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Ew, girl cooties. No wonder you're so gay.
User avatar #12 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Hey the fact that im more intouch with women doesnt make me gay the fact that i like dicks makes me gay
#5 - ***** u gai  [+] (7 new replies) 04/22/2014 on Human behaviour +1
User avatar #6 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Bi actually
User avatar #7 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Nigga das 50% gai
User avatar #8 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
I have three porn folders entirely of women one of which has almost 2,000 pics
User avatar #9 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Still 50% gay
User avatar #10 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Ive had four girlfriends and got in bed with one of them and her friend.
User avatar #11 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Ew, girl cooties. No wonder you're so gay.
User avatar #12 - cowandchicken (04/22/2014) [-]
Hey the fact that im more intouch with women doesnt make me gay the fact that i like dicks makes me gay
#12 - Games like this is why you pass history. 04/22/2014 on Leme tell y somtin +6
#9 - I would love to see the comics where they got together 04/22/2014 on Hobbes and Bacon 2 0
#14 - *Rising urge to scream your name*  [+] (1 new reply) 04/22/2014 on I just cant stop laughing +6
User avatar #23 - dafuckisthisshit (11 hours ago) [-]
if i had a nickle...
#13 - Not for ancient people who were surrounded by bears, wolves, a…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/22/2014 on The Meaning Of a Sunset 0
User avatar #14 - bigchilla (04/22/2014) [-]
Most civilizations back then worshipped the sun, most likely for that reason, people had no knowledge of where the sun went at night and they were never sure it would rise the next morning.
#31 - /k/ is like internet Russia, where everybody is stupid, everyb…  [+] (2 new replies) 04/22/2014 on Bunny is kill -6
#42 - Aejax (22 hours ago) [-]
>not wanting to live in Internet Russia
User avatar #56 - captainfuckitall (17 hours ago) [-]
>Implying I ever said I didn't
#16 - **** . I knew there was a reason I failed my Scien…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/22/2014 on its not like i burn or... +19
#18 - psyachu (04/22/2014) [-]
Don't worry about it. Happens to the best of us.
#26 - I can't wait till we get to The Tar Baby by Uncle Reamus! 04/22/2014 on PC story time +2
#11 - Nope, it was definitely Al Bundy. He tried to shoot his wife b…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/22/2014 on It's a love/hate thing 0
User avatar #12 - guanyu (04/22/2014) [-]
Psycho Dad* Wait, Psycho Dad never misses his target.
#52 - It's nice to see Ghost-Rider settling down and doing some good… 04/22/2014 on Bullet Immunity. +15
#35 - Wait, wouldn't the fridge kind of explode if you put too much …  [+] (1 new reply) 04/22/2014 on Want 0
User avatar #72 - iatedub (22 hours ago) [-]
Sticking penises in things is a serious matter.

Don't say you wouldn't either, its human nature.
#13 - "Uwaa~ My protons are exchanging on their own!"  [+] (12 new replies) 04/22/2014 on its not like i burn or... +3
#35 - neoexdeath (20 hours ago) [-]
If protons are separating from an atom, you've got WAY bigger problems then that.
#39 - anonymous (18 hours ago) [-]
guys protons transfer without splitting an atom that's what a hydrogen atom is. a fucking proton. hydrogen is a very mobile atom in chemical reactions.
#15 - psyachu (04/22/2014) [-]
But! Wha?! ...Only electrons are exchanged between atoms, doofus!
#23 - allinallout (04/22/2014) [-]
are you retarded?
#47 - psyachu (8 hours ago) [-]
How am I retarded? That hurt my feelings!
#22 - anonymous (04/22/2014) [-]
except in keto-enol tautomerization, hydrogen transfers in the intermediate steps of nucleophilic substitution reactions, and the countless other reactions I haven't even learned about yet.
User avatar #46 - psyachu (8 hours ago) [-]
Wow, never heard of any of that. My statement was the generalized common atom-to-atom interaction, not that fancy stuff. But it is nice to learn something new!
#32 - alfonshister (21 hours ago) [-]
"haven't learned about"
#38 - anonymous (19 hours ago) [-]
oh I'm assuming you have an encyclopedic knowledge of all organic reactions? Could you write down all the intermediates and mechanisms for me, it's not so easy for people outside of LA Noir
User avatar #43 - alfonshister (16 hours ago) [-]
all i said was that i think you know too much to add 'haven't learned about'. You literally sounded too intelligent.
calm down.
User avatar #16 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Shit. I knew there was a reason I failed my Science classes.
#18 - psyachu (04/22/2014) [-]
Don't worry about it. Happens to the best of us.
#51 - The very fact that this probably happened in real life sometim… 04/22/2014 on I Fucked Up 0
#81 - I'm really mixed on the issue. On one hand I dislike the idea … 04/22/2014 on Parenthood 0
#27 - But can it blend? 04/22/2014 on Hobbes and Bacon +2
#60 - There's never any medium with the stickies. The comments are a… 04/22/2014 on North korea pics I guess... 0
#15 - Gods damn this cat is sassy. 04/22/2014 on So romantic. +3
#38 - Or maybe Teenage Girl Tits look like Homers Moobs... 04/22/2014 on I- uhhh.... Okay.... +13
#134 - I think it really is a testament to our greatness that we drea…  [+] (2 new replies) 04/22/2014 on Humanity! Fuck yeah! +2
#138 - swiftshadow (04/22/2014) [-]
YET
User avatar #163 - darthsalias (04/22/2014) [-]
^ this man will be the one to create them
#42 - When you need to make a choice, flip a coin. Not because it wi… 04/22/2014 on Life's full of tough decisions +1

Comments(478):

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User avatar #483 - aerosol (9 hours ago) [-]
Have you by chance had an older account here before?
User avatar #484 to #483 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (9 hours ago) [-]
Yes I have. My first username was Hiimquinn, but it was deleted for some reason I never found, so I just made another.
#485 to #484 - aerosol (9 hours ago) [-]
Oh. Never mind then. I saw someone call you Dave and I mistook you for someone else.
User avatar #486 to #485 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (9 hours ago) [-]
It's fine. It was a joke from a picture a while back where a man was looking out the window and saw a dog and his owner walking down the street. The dog barked at another, bigger dog, and his owner just turned and said "See, this is why you have no ******* mates, Dave".
User avatar #481 - iforgotmyothername (03/20/2014) [-]
you are one cool tempered potato compared to me, bringing my fury upon your wrongness. i salute you, and thumbed up all your comments in the a capella debate.
User avatar #482 to #481 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (03/20/2014) [-]
It's alright, I apologize for making you upset, but you don't need to thumb my posts up. Thumbs are a way to express positivity or negativity toward any type of comments; if you do not like them, it is perfectly within your right to thumb them down.
User avatar #474 - aherorising (11/20/2013) [-]
you're a really cool bro
#471 - shiifter (10/06/2013) [-]
This still makes me giggle.

Oh and by the way, i never actually thumbed you down. I just said that i did.
User avatar #472 to #471 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (10/06/2013) [-]
The thing is, the way I found OUT you gave me those thumbs was because of the question mark, which allows people to see who voted on content. I could only KNOW it was you if you had thumbed them down, which you did.

And now you not only prove to be an idiot, but a liar as well.
#473 to #472 - shiifter (10/12/2013) [-]
Wait? You still remembered that? That's hilarious.

By the way, i screencapped this. it's like a trophy.
User avatar #468 - satrenkotheone (09/22/2013) [-]
I would just like to say thank you.
User avatar #469 to #468 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (09/22/2013) [-]
For?
#466 - anonymous (08/25/2013) [-]
Due to your pointlessly rude comment on the post "Jesus ain't got time for **** ",

I have gone through 20 of your previous comments and thumbed them all down.

You're also a stupid, unfunny, tryhard feelfag. Exactly the kind of user that this site is infamous for.
User avatar #467 to #466 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (08/25/2013) [-]
I wasn't pointlessly rude. If you read it more carefully, you would find I am not insulting your god or faith, but rather, the people who spread it about; and even they are just doing it to themselves, while I am mearly making an observation

It's ironic you call me tryhard, considering you just went through the time to thumb-down my last 20 comments as if it would have any effect on me personally or my ranking here. It's also odd you call me stupid, considering you were the one who read it uncorrectly. And I think the fact I have so many comment thumbs anyways (including my own jesus comment) speaks to the point that I am, in fact, quite hilarious. "Feelfag", is that supposed to be a derogatory term for someone who is passionate about certain things? If so, then I take pride in it, as it is only through passion that things grow.

Considering you are pretentious, arrogant, ******** , and without a sense of humour; you fit the criteria for '12 year old funnyjunker' far better than I do.
#463 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.   
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.   
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.   
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
User avatar #464 to #463 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (07/16/2013) [-]
You are just a wonderful person, you know that? Thank you very much for your kind words and appreciation, and I'm glad you have made an account and made many friends here, including myself
#465 to #464 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
You're welcome, good sir.
You're welcome, good sir.
User avatar #461 - potgardener (06/01/2013) [-]
youre pretty ****** in the head if beating a kid is a good idea, parents would need to hit their kids if they taught them what was right and wrong from the beginning
User avatar #462 to #461 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (06/01/2013) [-]
It's ironic how you talk about avoiding situations, when your very comment isn't needed considering I already explained, about five times now, that I do not mean you must 'abuse' your children in order to get good results. My comment, and all the comments afterwards, were about how when compassion and support fails you must turn to punishment and discipline, including simply smacking your kid upside the head

Perhaps you should read more and get better informed before jumping to opinions, yes?
#459 - bossdelainternet (05/11/2013) [-]
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest  threads i've seen this year.   
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...   
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest threads i've seen this year.
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
User avatar #460 to #459 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (05/11/2013) [-]
I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult

I choose the former

Thank you, good sir
#453 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
I just thought I'd let you know that I just did an awful thing and quoted your majestic deep words of death wisdom onto my facebook. I gave you credit, but as part of my shame for stealing I thought I'd tell you. That was honestly one of the best things I've ever read.

Which is also why I screencapped it. Don't worry I swear I'm not going to try to get to frontpage with it I just wanted to save it.
User avatar #454 to #453 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (11/12/2012) [-]
Not at all, I am not concerned with thumbs in the least. If you would like to post it, by all means do so, if you'd like to take credit, do so as well; I care not for material value or fame, as long as comprehend and understand the message
#455 to #454 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
Oh man you just keep getting better:)    
   
But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
Oh man you just keep getting better:)

But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
#449 - captainspankmonkey (02/27/2012) [-]
Internet problems
That is why :P
User avatar #450 to #460 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (02/27/2012) [-]
ahhh, haha, sorry then :P
#447 - anonymous (09/26/2011) [-]
you're a lovely person
User avatar #448 to #458 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (09/26/2011) [-]
awe, thank you, kind stranger :3

that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :D
#444 - captainspankmonkey (08/22/2011) [-]
Im becoming level 28 soon
User avatar #445 to #454 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (08/22/2011) [-]
sooooooooooooooooon............
User avatar #446 to #455 - captainspankmonkey (08/22/2011) [-]
very soooooooooooooooooooooon......
#437 - anonymous (07/31/2011) [-]
Lololololol mfw you block me and delete my comment because I expose that you're an ignorant dumbass
User avatar #438 to #447 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (07/31/2011) [-]
no, i didn't block you because you "exposed that i am an ignorant dumbass". i blocked you because i know who you are, and remembered who you are. you are thebiggestmaggot. you have a (last time i checked) profile picture of an old lady with bouncing tits in a swimsuit. and you are also a nihilist that annoyed the hell out of me last time i talked because you were ignorant, arrogant, and rude, and drove me to a place i don't like going to simply because i do not like people like you. the reason i removed the comment is because 1. it was wrong. 2. you wouldn't have listened if i told you otherwise. and 3. it was Wikipedia, and unreliable source. and, since you are against what i believe, you will logically look for a source that undermines it. and i simply don't have the patience to deal with you

that's why
#436 - captainspankmonkey (07/04/2011) [-]
Happy 4th of july!
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