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captainfuckitall

Rank #349 on Comments
captainfuckitall Avatar Level 349 Comments: Sold Soul
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Last status update:
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Personal Info
Date Signed Up:4/12/2010
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#349
Highest Content Rank:#10530
Highest Comment Rank:#49
Content Thumbs: 34 total,  90 ,  56
Comment Thumbs: 53300 total,  65095 ,  11795
Content Level Progress: 66.1% (39/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 24.7% (247/1000)
Level 349 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 350 Comments: Knight Of Funnyjunk
Subscribers:21
Content Views:9754
Times Content Favorited:12 times
Total Comments Made:15493
FJ Points:21472

latest user's comments

#7 - It seems you're slightly fanny-troubled  [+] (3 new replies) 09/14/2013 on Arthur's dad is kind of a... +9
User avatar #26 - qwertyuioplkjh (09/14/2013) [-]
WAIT A SECOND...Is he 'slightly', the fanny troubled OR slightly-fanny-troubled?
#52 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
User avatar #8 - slightly (09/14/2013) [-]
Exactly.
#5 - Please do not thumb this up. It is a repost of something I sa…  [+] (9 new replies) 09/14/2013 on Arthur's dad is kind of a... +32
User avatar #54 - mistafishy (09/14/2013) [-]
Dude, I got SO fucking confused.

I was freaking out- I remember replying to this same post already and I was all like- FJ has an archive!?
User avatar #43 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
I ask you assholes to do one god damn thing, and you can't even do that right...
User avatar #21 - chezburgadominator (09/14/2013) [-]
I was about to mention how this post sounded familiar.
User avatar #20 - whtkid (09/14/2013) [-]
I actually tought that i somehow came back to the exact same post for a secound because of you
User avatar #6 - slightly (09/14/2013) [-]
Fuck you.
User avatar #7 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
It seems you're slightly fanny-troubled
User avatar #26 - qwertyuioplkjh (09/14/2013) [-]
WAIT A SECOND...Is he 'slightly', the fanny troubled OR slightly-fanny-troubled?
#52 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
User avatar #8 - slightly (09/14/2013) [-]
Exactly.
#4 - This reminds me of my own father I ******* …  [+] (28 new replies) 09/14/2013 on Arthur's dad is kind of a... +86
User avatar #41 - sonnyboii (09/14/2013) [-]
Im pretty sure ive seen this somewhere else
User avatar #44 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
You have, I reposted it in the hopes someone would get a laugh out of it. In a comment below I specifically asked people not to thumb it up
User avatar #46 - sonnyboii (09/14/2013) [-]
Ah, its cool bro
#37 - foreveragunner (09/14/2013) [-]
am i traveling in the fucking tardis ?
User avatar #45 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
No. Dr.Who is getting annoying by the way
User avatar #36 - legamethatyoulost (09/14/2013) [-]
Maybe you should stop going camping with your dad.
User avatar #16 - meanmagikarp (09/14/2013) [-]
your dad's a fuarking boss
User avatar #14 - thornberry (09/14/2013) [-]
You only needed to tell us the first time
User avatar #47 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
Not everyone has seen it, some would still find it funny, and it would be a shame to deprive a good story just because you don't want to hear it again
User avatar #49 - thornberry (09/14/2013) [-]
I was just kidding with ya
User avatar #50 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
Oh, sorry about that. It's hard to tell sarcasm over text
User avatar #71 - thornberry (09/14/2013) [-]
BACK THE FUCK OFF!

its okay
#12 - anonymous (09/14/2013) [-]
Dude calm the fuck down. You were 41, you should care what you dad thinks/does to you.
User avatar #51 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
I suppose you were trying to say that I shouldn't be so irritated over my fathers actions because he's my father. In short, I'm not irritated, I love my father and appreciate all the time I spend with him, I figured the last line would get across that I would like to take after him when I'm older
#11 - anonymous (09/14/2013) [-]
you are a faggot no-one cares. If you want to go cry and bitch get off this site and go fuck yourself
#10 - anonymous (09/14/2013) [-]
i was expecting some fucked up 4chan-green-text shit at the end like: "i miss him" or "and then he walked the dinosaur"

good for you
#9 - dickthebutt (09/14/2013) [-]
copy paste.... wtf
User avatar #48 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
Yes it is, because I figured some people might still enjoy it
User avatar #5 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
Please do not thumb this up. It is a repost of something I said on the same post a while back. I just thought it was funny and would bring many laughs over my based father
User avatar #54 - mistafishy (09/14/2013) [-]
Dude, I got SO fucking confused.

I was freaking out- I remember replying to this same post already and I was all like- FJ has an archive!?
User avatar #43 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
I ask you assholes to do one god damn thing, and you can't even do that right...
User avatar #21 - chezburgadominator (09/14/2013) [-]
I was about to mention how this post sounded familiar.
User avatar #20 - whtkid (09/14/2013) [-]
I actually tought that i somehow came back to the exact same post for a secound because of you
User avatar #6 - slightly (09/14/2013) [-]
Fuck you.
User avatar #7 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
It seems you're slightly fanny-troubled
User avatar #26 - qwertyuioplkjh (09/14/2013) [-]
WAIT A SECOND...Is he 'slightly', the fanny troubled OR slightly-fanny-troubled?
#52 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
User avatar #8 - slightly (09/14/2013) [-]
Exactly.
#9 - You should just save it and repost it, like I do with the Humo… 09/14/2013 on In A Parallel Universe... 0
#61 - I was literally just on that thread again 09/14/2013 on Made me laugh 0
#32 - >Being this Liberal 09/14/2013 on Made me laugh +2
#90 - See, every time someone says "There is no such thing as a… 09/14/2013 on 10 Crazy Kids who Kill 0
#14 - You're a smart one 09/14/2013 on MFW tried to discuss... +3
#48 - I never noticed how stupid the word 'Gratz' is before I saw th… 09/14/2013 on Yo +4
#5 - Am I the only one who thinks dat ass looks smashing? 09/14/2013 on Splashing! +2
#8 - I once heard a wonderful quote: "If Feminists in… 09/14/2013 on *applauds internally* +45
#11 - I remember seeing an entire thread of these on /pol/ …  [+] (3 new replies) 09/14/2013 on Made me laugh +5
#60 - scarasm (09/14/2013) [-]
Here you are. It's still on /pol/ if you're interested.
User avatar #61 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
I was literally just on that thread again
#38 - spambassador (09/14/2013) [-]
I can certainly how something like that might come around full circle, and even potentially be counter-intuitive to the racism is was "eliminating" personally, I wouldnt really care if there were more or less black people in the stories and media I intake. I could maybe dig a little bit more culture in some things sometimes I guess.
#10 - I like Schnizel, he tells it like it is and doesn't afraid of …  [+] (1 new reply) 09/13/2013 on Made me laugh +1
User avatar #31 - schnizel (09/14/2013) [-]

I like you to buddy.
#8 - >Implying Athiests don't get into theological debates just …  [+] (3 new replies) 09/13/2013 on MFW tried to discuss... +23
#29 - superduperscooper has deleted their comment.
#13 - HarvietheDinkle (09/14/2013) [-]
User avatar #14 - captainfuckitall (09/14/2013) [-]
You're a smart one
#20 - Damn it, I was hoping you'd just say "It's called Another… 09/13/2013 on May I +3
#9 - I want to hate you so much, but I just can't 09/13/2013 on Turtles +3
#11 - Another what?  [+] (3 new replies) 09/13/2013 on May I +2
#17 - infinitereaper (09/13/2013) [-]
The show is called "Another"
It's horror/mystery.
If I had to give it a review I'd say 7.9/10. Its good, not great but good.
It just hat horror is such a hard genre to pull off. It's definitely worth the watch though.
User avatar #25 - savvasp (09/13/2013) [-]
I started watching it and figured out I don't like watching horror/mystery in the slightest. I dropped it at 3-4 episodes and watching it just made me feel uneasy really.
User avatar #20 - captainfuckitall (09/13/2013) [-]
Damn it, I was hoping you'd just say "It's called Another", and I would say something stupid like "Another name?" and we would continue in a horrid attempt to try and reason out the title of an anime.

You just ruined my fun
#18 - This thread is filled with MEN  [+] (1 new reply) 09/13/2013 on Bow to the queen 0
#21 - bigsaltyballs (09/13/2013) [-]
indeed it is my friend
#7 - Dude, don't worry; every single one of your ancestors got laid… 09/13/2013 on Famous Pussay +23
#22 - No different than pony **** 09/13/2013 on Shingeki no Mcdonalds -1
#221 - Participate in sports Hang out with men Participate in…  [+] (1 new reply) 09/13/2013 on Doctors hate this guy! +1
User avatar #223 - mastergoinbate (09/13/2013) [-]
Fuck yea man thanks. Good to know someone on here isn't a complete asshole
#188 - Quite so. Something I actually noticed, when you cut a lot of …  [+] (1 new reply) 09/12/2013 on Doctors hate this guy! +1
User avatar #191 - greedtheavaricious (09/12/2013) [-]
Yup, kind of know that. Been addicted to coke for quite a while. Now it tastes... weird. Also chocolate. Barely eat it anymore. It doesn't taste bad.... just, well, kind of weird. Still enjoyable, just not something I'd want to have more than once a week. And only a little.
#182 - The beard was the hardest part, actually. I have a goatee with…  [+] (3 new replies) 09/12/2013 on Doctors hate this guy! 0
User avatar #220 - mastergoinbate (09/13/2013) [-]
Im 16 and my dad didn't have facial hair until he was 20 so I have a long way to go. I also need a good workout plan...
User avatar #221 - captainfuckitall (09/13/2013) [-]
Participate in sports
Hang out with men
Participate in competitive activities
Watch born/have sex (whatever you can do to anticipate sex)
Eat red meat
Massage your face

The first five will increase your testosterone, not only giving you more bone density and muscle mass (and manliness in general), but it will greatly increase the levels of hair growth, especially body and facial hair

The last will stimulate the hair follicles on the face, causing greater growth
User avatar #223 - mastergoinbate (09/13/2013) [-]
Fuck yea man thanks. Good to know someone on here isn't a complete asshole
#181 - What? 09/12/2013 on Doctors hate this guy! 0
#180 - I wish I could, but my computer is a two bit piece of *… 09/12/2013 on Doctors hate this guy! 0

Comments(489):

[ 489 comments ]

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#492 - miia ONLINE (12/13/2014) [-]
User avatar #494 to #492 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (12/13/2014) [-]
Well aren't you a sweetheart for helping me get over my fear
#495 to #494 - miia ONLINE (12/13/2014) [-]
im actually about to go to bed but hi
User avatar #496 to #495 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (12/13/2014) [-]
Well don't let me keep you. Hi back, and feel free to continue the conversation any time.
User avatar #490 - commencingfailure (09/30/2014) [-]
******* retard compares the IS to today's feminists. One could say ignorance is an everspreading cancer, you did your job to increase the spread.
User avatar #491 to #490 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (09/30/2014) [-]
You seem REALLY mad, friend. Perhaps you should calm down and take some ass ointment before you need to see a doctor
User avatar #489 - myfourthaccount (07/18/2014) [-]
dude, you're like my most favorite person on earth right now haha
User avatar #487 - imvlad (05/04/2014) [-]
you brought shame to your house
User avatar #483 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Have you by chance had an older account here before?
User avatar #484 to #483 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (04/22/2014) [-]
Yes I have. My first username was Hiimquinn, but it was deleted for some reason I never found, so I just made another.
#485 to #484 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Oh. Never mind then. I saw someone call you Dave and I mistook you for someone else.
User avatar #486 to #485 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (04/22/2014) [-]
It's fine. It was a joke from a picture a while back where a man was looking out the window and saw a dog and his owner walking down the street. The dog barked at another, bigger dog, and his owner just turned and said "See, this is why you have no ******* mates, Dave".
User avatar #481 - iforgotmyothername (03/20/2014) [-]
you are one cool tempered potato compared to me, bringing my fury upon your wrongness. i salute you, and thumbed up all your comments in the a capella debate.
User avatar #482 to #481 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (03/20/2014) [-]
It's alright, I apologize for making you upset, but you don't need to thumb my posts up. Thumbs are a way to express positivity or negativity toward any type of comments; if you do not like them, it is perfectly within your right to thumb them down.
#480 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#479 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#478 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#477 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#476 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
User avatar #474 - aherorising (11/20/2013) [-]
you're a really cool bro
#471 - shiifter (10/06/2013) [-]
This still makes me giggle.

Oh and by the way, i never actually thumbed you down. I just said that i did.
User avatar #472 to #471 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (10/06/2013) [-]
The thing is, the way I found OUT you gave me those thumbs was because of the question mark, which allows people to see who voted on content. I could only KNOW it was you if you had thumbed them down, which you did.

And now you not only prove to be an idiot, but a liar as well.
#473 to #472 - shiifter (10/12/2013) [-]
Wait? You still remembered that? That's hilarious.

By the way, i screencapped this. it's like a trophy.
User avatar #468 - satrenkotheone (09/22/2013) [-]
I would just like to say thank you.
User avatar #469 to #468 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (09/22/2013) [-]
For?
#466 - anonymous (08/25/2013) [-]
Due to your pointlessly rude comment on the post "Jesus ain't got time for **** ",

I have gone through 20 of your previous comments and thumbed them all down.

You're also a stupid, unfunny, tryhard feelfag. Exactly the kind of user that this site is infamous for.
User avatar #467 to #466 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (08/25/2013) [-]
I wasn't pointlessly rude. If you read it more carefully, you would find I am not insulting your god or faith, but rather, the people who spread it about; and even they are just doing it to themselves, while I am mearly making an observation

It's ironic you call me tryhard, considering you just went through the time to thumb-down my last 20 comments as if it would have any effect on me personally or my ranking here. It's also odd you call me stupid, considering you were the one who read it uncorrectly. And I think the fact I have so many comment thumbs anyways (including my own jesus comment) speaks to the point that I am, in fact, quite hilarious. "Feelfag", is that supposed to be a derogatory term for someone who is passionate about certain things? If so, then I take pride in it, as it is only through passion that things grow.

Considering you are pretentious, arrogant, immature, and without a sense of humour; you fit the criteria for '12 year old funnyjunker' far better than I do.
#463 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.   
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.   
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.   
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
User avatar #464 to #463 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (07/16/2013) [-]
You are just a wonderful person, you know that? Thank you very much for your kind words and appreciation, and I'm glad you have made an account and made many friends here, including myself
#465 to #464 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
You're welcome, good sir.
You're welcome, good sir.
User avatar #461 - potgardener (06/01/2013) [-]
youre pretty ****** in the head if beating a kid is a good idea, parents would need to hit their kids if they taught them what was right and wrong from the beginning
User avatar #462 to #461 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (06/01/2013) [-]
It's ironic how you talk about avoiding situations, when your very comment isn't needed considering I already explained, about five times now, that I do not mean you must 'abuse' your children in order to get good results. My comment, and all the comments afterwards, were about how when compassion and support fails you must turn to punishment and discipline, including simply smacking your kid upside the head

Perhaps you should read more and get better informed before jumping to opinions, yes?
#459 - bossdelainternet (05/11/2013) [-]
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest  threads i've seen this year.   
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...   
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest threads i've seen this year.
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
User avatar #460 to #459 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (05/11/2013) [-]
I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult

I choose the former

Thank you, good sir
#453 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
I just thought I'd let you know that I just did an awful thing and quoted your majestic deep words of death wisdom onto my facebook. I gave you credit, but as part of my shame for stealing I thought I'd tell you. That was honestly one of the best things I've ever read.

Which is also why I screencapped it. Don't worry I swear I'm not going to try to get to frontpage with it I just wanted to save it.
User avatar #454 to #453 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (11/12/2012) [-]
Not at all, I am not concerned with thumbs in the least. If you would like to post it, by all means do so, if you'd like to take credit, do so as well; I care not for material value or fame, as long as comprehend and understand the message
#455 to #454 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
Oh man you just keep getting better:)    
   
But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
Oh man you just keep getting better:)

But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
#449 - captainspankmonkey (02/27/2012) [-]
Internet problems
That is why :P
User avatar #450 to #460 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (02/27/2012) [-]
ahhh, haha, sorry then :P
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