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captainfuckitall    

Rank #726 on Comments
captainfuckitall Avatar Level 344 Comments: Sold Soul
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Personal Info
Date Signed Up:4/12/2010
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#726
Highest Content Rank:#10530
Highest Comment Rank:#49
Content Thumbs: 40 total,  90 ,  50
Comment Thumbs: 46060 total,  56802 ,  10742
Content Level Progress: 76.27% (45/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 11% (110/1000)
Level 344 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 345 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:20
Content Views:9664
Times Content Favorited:12 times
Total Comments Made:14426
FJ Points:16341

latest user's comments

#25 - Except for Kenpachi, apparently. 07/07/2014 on anime fights +15
#13 - How wonderful would it be if a bunch of us could meet up, pool…  [+] (4 new replies) 07/06/2014 on Fucking Castle Building +11
User avatar #44 - sewallman (07/07/2014) [-]
There are blue prints for 3 story apartment buildings actually,

earthbagplans.wordpress.com/2012/02/04/rainwater-towers-apartments-2/

If FJ bought land, and started it's own earthbag town.. That'd be cool. I'd name the town "AdminTown"
User avatar #14 - mattdoggy (07/06/2014) [-]
It's been done on a few other internet communities before
the /b/rotherhood of retards attempted innumerable times to buy a private island. Almost went through with it afew times
User avatar #16 - sigmundisdabest (07/06/2014) [-]
Got any pics or sources? That sounds hillarious.
User avatar #20 - phantomeins (07/06/2014) [-]
1d4chan.org/wiki/The_/tg/_Project

Not what he's talking about, but stuff like this has happened before.
#26 - Hm, it obviously changed a lot since the last time I saw it, b… 07/05/2014 on IE Back Then 0
#1 - No 07/05/2014 on 4chan relationship advice +1
#10 - Not even worldwide?  [+] (4 new replies) 07/05/2014 on IE Back Then 0
User avatar #22 - burnswhenipee (07/05/2014) [-]
I believe this is worldwide

urlink.it/?BrowserUsage
User avatar #26 - captainfuckitall (07/05/2014) [-]
Hm, it obviously changed a lot since the last time I saw it, but it seems you are correct; my mistake.
User avatar #11 - billybong (07/05/2014) [-]
well actually that data is just people who visit that site, so..... it doesn't have much bearing whatsoever.

so nfi overall, but I'd still be willing to bet that chrome has higher utilization than IE
#18 - anonymous (07/05/2014) [-]
I am pretty sure normalfags stick with IE.
#3 - Last time I checked, most of the world uses Internet Explorer.…  [+] (15 new replies) 07/05/2014 on IE Back Then -20
User avatar #8 - billybong (07/05/2014) [-]
Naw, that's not even close anymore.

Chrome is way over 50% usage and climbing and FF has <25% and dropping IE is at an all time low at <10%
User avatar #39 - billybong (07/05/2014) [-]
Further reading would take you to comment #11 where I already mentioned the info I posted is useless
User avatar #9 - billybong (07/05/2014) [-]
User avatar #10 - captainfuckitall (07/05/2014) [-]
Not even worldwide?
User avatar #22 - burnswhenipee (07/05/2014) [-]
I believe this is worldwide

urlink.it/?BrowserUsage
User avatar #26 - captainfuckitall (07/05/2014) [-]
Hm, it obviously changed a lot since the last time I saw it, but it seems you are correct; my mistake.
User avatar #11 - billybong (07/05/2014) [-]
well actually that data is just people who visit that site, so..... it doesn't have much bearing whatsoever.

so nfi overall, but I'd still be willing to bet that chrome has higher utilization than IE
#18 - anonymous (07/05/2014) [-]
I am pretty sure normalfags stick with IE.
#4 - likerofbutts (07/05/2014) [-]
I like Opera.
User avatar #5 - zaxzwim (07/05/2014) [-]
you also like butts apparently
#19 - likerofbutts (07/05/2014) [-]
That would be fair to say.
User avatar #51 - vigilum (07/05/2014) [-]
We have so much in common!
#61 - likerofbutts (07/06/2014) [-]
Neat. I don't think I've ever met anyone that uses Opera.
User avatar #62 - vigilum (07/06/2014) [-]
I think I've met like one other guy.
#9 - Not the weirdest one I've ever heard of. I once knew …  [+] (1 new reply) 07/04/2014 on Weird Phobia Comp 0
User avatar #10 - icameheretotroll (07/05/2014) [-]
Nope, It didn't start from early trauma
It just slowly popped up I have no idea why
first time it occurred was when I was on a hammock looking up in the sky and it felt like I was falling up and got really scared
it doesn't really terrify me anymore though it just makes me uncomfortable
sort of like if you had a fear of clowns you wouldn't scream when you saw a clown just you'd feel uneasy around them
#3 - Uh oh, now we're going to have a bunch of people come onto the… 07/04/2014 on My life +1
#2 - For some reason, this comic makes me really sad 07/04/2014 on dinner +1
#5 - I don't know whether this is very strange or adorable. 07/04/2014 on classic 4chan 0
#4 - @No 07/02/2014 on (untitled) +1
#28 - Isn't that armour supposed to be impenetrable? How the hell di…  [+] (4 new replies) 07/01/2014 on Well, that explains a lot 0
User avatar #40 - jaegarbombastic (07/01/2014) [-]
He figured out the carbon makeup of it and rearranged the particles within it using alchemy kind of how Scar uses his in Brotherhood to destroy things making the armor just the same as skin if not more brittle and he just pressed his hand on his chest and simply shoved through like butter.
User avatar #31 - unlucki (07/01/2014) [-]
Its been a while but i think it was Ed figured out how the shield worked and broke down the chemical propertys of it and rearranged it
User avatar #30 - attifyon (07/01/2014) [-]
He is the main character of an anime, how do you think?
User avatar #51 - sixfivefourtwoone (07/02/2014) [-]
Yeah, but ed loses fights too, one of which kills him. (not even including a spoiler alert, it's an old ass anime, if you didn't know that on such a well known anime, i'd assume you didn't care)
#34 - While I'm sure racial profiling does exist, I would like to po…  [+] (4 new replies) 07/01/2014 on Guess the Race +1
User avatar #49 - captainrattrap (07/01/2014) [-]
There's a possibility that when cops want to arrest someone, they don't go to Chinatown or Little Seoul... They go to the hood and find the nearest "suspicious looking" black kid and shoot him because he probably has drugs on him.
User avatar #51 - ShadeElement (07/01/2014) [-]
You just completely severed all ties with reality.
User avatar #52 - captainrattrap (07/01/2014) [-]
Ok if you think so...
User avatar #53 - ShadeElement (07/01/2014) [-]
Please, allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Daniel, and I help a homeless shelter and crisis center for homeless teens.
On any given day, my shelter has anywhere from 60 to 100 street kids staying with us or utilizing our services in some way.
90% of them have some criminal record.
70% of them are currently active in some criminal behavior.
68% of them (as of our last audit) were minorities.

Drugs, rape, and violence are an every day fact of life for me. I see it daily.
I also see the cops daily. Either dropping off a youth in need, responding to an emergency at my shelter, or looking to question/arrest a youth.

I can tell you cops are no one's friend. They work for the city, not the citizens. They are also flawed humans like the rest of us.

That being said, they have a tough job, and most do the best job they can. I have yet to see the bigots with a gun that you seem to think they are.

What I can tell you, from years of personal and professional experience, is the outcome of a police encounter often depends on how you react to them. If you were raised to treat cops with hatred and disrespect, then odds are your interactions with the police aren't going to go as well as someone who was raised to call them "sir".

I've seen black murderers and rapists be escorted away politely into the back of a patrol car without even being cuffed. I've seen white kids beaten, tasered, and maced over shoplifting. The deciding factor was how he reacted to the police.
#30 - When you've seen enough traps, it becomes a bit easy to recognize. 07/01/2014 on How to Train your heart +1
#23 - Knowing that most of those are probably guys ruins it makes …  [+] (2 new replies) 07/01/2014 on How to Train your heart +1
#29 - applescryatnight (07/01/2014) [-]
how do you know they are guys?
User avatar #30 - captainfuckitall (07/01/2014) [-]
When you've seen enough traps, it becomes a bit easy to recognize.
#22 - With a face like that, I can completely understand how his pai… 06/29/2014 on Flawless animation Part 1 +7
#13 - It depends on which sect of christianity you follow. Some say … 06/29/2014 on all hail stan 0
#187 - She's the mother, and she looks different than usual because s… 06/28/2014 on To all you loli-lovers 0
#40 - Toradora It's an okay anime about romance and Tsunderes.  [+] (2 new replies) 06/28/2014 on To all you loli-lovers 0
User avatar #44 - goldenfairy (06/28/2014) [-]
It looked like it but I somewhat fail to recognize this woman.
User avatar #187 - captainfuckitall (06/28/2014) [-]
She's the mother, and she looks different than usual because she's angry in that picture, v.s. her usual happy, make-up filled demeanour.
#603 - Nice try, F.B.I, but you're not gonna find where the bodies ar… 06/28/2014 on FJ Secrets 2 +16
#95 - How do you figure?  [+] (4 new replies) 06/28/2014 on i want the d 0
User avatar #196 - helenwheels (06/28/2014) [-]
I think its hard for anyone to get a date. But since you only see things from a mans perspective you only do think its hard for you.
User avatar #113 - trivdiego (06/28/2014) [-]
I personally feel like if you can truly make her feel more special than any other guy can, she will think you're the one. How you do it varies with each girl, its finding out how that's the hard part
#173 - unfortunately (06/28/2014) [-]
I tried this, didn't work.
#161 - anonymous (06/28/2014) [-]
But see, a hot girl just has to walk up and take her shirt off. Job done.
#109 - Good for you; I think that just means you're emotionally stabl… 06/27/2014 on its kinda hot 0
#108 - No. No it can't. If you like masculine features or aspects, it… 06/27/2014 on its kinda hot -1
#103 - Asexual is a complete lack of libido. It's not so much a 'sexu… 06/27/2014 on its kinda hot 0
#102 - You probably are though. Seriously. What's wrong with being ca…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/27/2014 on its kinda hot 0
User avatar #106 - renespar (06/27/2014) [-]
nothing's wrong with it, it's just not enirely accurate, for me at least, I can be attracted to anyone, men, women, intersex, etc, no matter what they actually look like, it's their personality, I could easily get insanely attracted to someone who looks like susan boyle if they were a good person, while someone could look like a supermodel and I wouldn't even have a half-erection ever if they had a shitty personality
User avatar #109 - captainfuckitall (06/27/2014) [-]
Good for you; I think that just means you're emotionally stable and have your priorities straight. There are plenty of people exactly like you who really are attracted to personality more than anything else; but I would still bet my left testicle that you masturbate to porn or some type of fantasy.

Comments(481):

[ 481 comments ]

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User avatar #489 - myfourthaccount (07/18/2014) [-]
dude, you're like my most favorite person on earth right now haha
User avatar #487 - imvlad (05/04/2014) [-]
you brought shame to your house
User avatar #483 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Have you by chance had an older account here before?
User avatar #484 to #483 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (04/22/2014) [-]
Yes I have. My first username was Hiimquinn, but it was deleted for some reason I never found, so I just made another.
#485 to #484 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Oh. Never mind then. I saw someone call you Dave and I mistook you for someone else.
User avatar #486 to #485 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (04/22/2014) [-]
It's fine. It was a joke from a picture a while back where a man was looking out the window and saw a dog and his owner walking down the street. The dog barked at another, bigger dog, and his owner just turned and said "See, this is why you have no ******* mates, Dave".
User avatar #481 - iforgotmyothername (03/20/2014) [-]
you are one cool tempered potato compared to me, bringing my fury upon your wrongness. i salute you, and thumbed up all your comments in the a capella debate.
User avatar #482 to #481 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (03/20/2014) [-]
It's alright, I apologize for making you upset, but you don't need to thumb my posts up. Thumbs are a way to express positivity or negativity toward any type of comments; if you do not like them, it is perfectly within your right to thumb them down.
User avatar #474 - aherorising (11/20/2013) [-]
you're a really cool bro
#471 - shiifter (10/06/2013) [-]
This still makes me giggle.

Oh and by the way, i never actually thumbed you down. I just said that i did.
User avatar #472 to #471 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (10/06/2013) [-]
The thing is, the way I found OUT you gave me those thumbs was because of the question mark, which allows people to see who voted on content. I could only KNOW it was you if you had thumbed them down, which you did.

And now you not only prove to be an idiot, but a liar as well.
#473 to #472 - shiifter (10/12/2013) [-]
Wait? You still remembered that? That's hilarious.

By the way, i screencapped this. it's like a trophy.
User avatar #468 - satrenkotheone (09/22/2013) [-]
I would just like to say thank you.
User avatar #469 to #468 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (09/22/2013) [-]
For?
#466 - anonymous (08/25/2013) [-]
Due to your pointlessly rude comment on the post "Jesus ain't got time for **** ",

I have gone through 20 of your previous comments and thumbed them all down.

You're also a stupid, unfunny, tryhard feelfag. Exactly the kind of user that this site is infamous for.
User avatar #467 to #466 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (08/25/2013) [-]
I wasn't pointlessly rude. If you read it more carefully, you would find I am not insulting your god or faith, but rather, the people who spread it about; and even they are just doing it to themselves, while I am mearly making an observation

It's ironic you call me tryhard, considering you just went through the time to thumb-down my last 20 comments as if it would have any effect on me personally or my ranking here. It's also odd you call me stupid, considering you were the one who read it uncorrectly. And I think the fact I have so many comment thumbs anyways (including my own jesus comment) speaks to the point that I am, in fact, quite hilarious. "Feelfag", is that supposed to be a derogatory term for someone who is passionate about certain things? If so, then I take pride in it, as it is only through passion that things grow.

Considering you are pretentious, arrogant, immature, and without a sense of humour; you fit the criteria for '12 year old funnyjunker' far better than I do.
#463 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.   
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.   
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.   
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
User avatar #464 to #463 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (07/16/2013) [-]
You are just a wonderful person, you know that? Thank you very much for your kind words and appreciation, and I'm glad you have made an account and made many friends here, including myself
#465 to #464 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
You're welcome, good sir.
You're welcome, good sir.
User avatar #461 - potgardener (06/01/2013) [-]
youre pretty ****** in the head if beating a kid is a good idea, parents would need to hit their kids if they taught them what was right and wrong from the beginning
User avatar #462 to #461 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (06/01/2013) [-]
It's ironic how you talk about avoiding situations, when your very comment isn't needed considering I already explained, about five times now, that I do not mean you must 'abuse' your children in order to get good results. My comment, and all the comments afterwards, were about how when compassion and support fails you must turn to punishment and discipline, including simply smacking your kid upside the head

Perhaps you should read more and get better informed before jumping to opinions, yes?
#459 - bossdelainternet (05/11/2013) [-]
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest  threads i've seen this year.   
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...   
&quot;Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'.&quot; - Family Guy
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest threads i've seen this year.
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
User avatar #460 to #459 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (05/11/2013) [-]
I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult

I choose the former

Thank you, good sir
#453 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
I just thought I'd let you know that I just did an awful thing and quoted your majestic deep words of death wisdom onto my facebook. I gave you credit, but as part of my shame for stealing I thought I'd tell you. That was honestly one of the best things I've ever read.

Which is also why I screencapped it. Don't worry I swear I'm not going to try to get to frontpage with it I just wanted to save it.
User avatar #454 to #453 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (11/12/2012) [-]
Not at all, I am not concerned with thumbs in the least. If you would like to post it, by all means do so, if you'd like to take credit, do so as well; I care not for material value or fame, as long as comprehend and understand the message
#455 to #454 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
Oh man you just keep getting better:)    
   
But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
Oh man you just keep getting better:)

But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
#449 - captainspankmonkey (02/27/2012) [-]
Internet problems
That is why :P
User avatar #450 to #460 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (02/27/2012) [-]
ahhh, haha, sorry then :P
#447 - anonymous (09/26/2011) [-]
you're a lovely person
User avatar #448 to #458 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (09/26/2011) [-]
awe, thank you, kind stranger :3

that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :D
#444 - captainspankmonkey (08/22/2011) [-]
Im becoming level 28 soon
User avatar #445 to #454 - captainfuckitall ONLINE (08/22/2011) [-]
sooooooooooooooooon............
User avatar #446 to #455 - captainspankmonkey (08/22/2011) [-]
very soooooooooooooooooooooon......
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