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captainfuckitall    

Rank #291 on Comments
captainfuckitall Avatar Level 348 Comments: Sold Soul
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Date Signed Up:4/12/2010
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#291
Highest Content Rank:#10530
Highest Comment Rank:#49
Content Thumbs: 34 total,  90 ,  56
Comment Thumbs: 52064 total,  63617 ,  11553
Content Level Progress: 66.1% (39/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 38.1% (381/1000)
Level 348 Comments: Sold Soul → Level 349 Comments: Sold Soul
Subscribers:21
Content Views:9728
Times Content Favorited:12 times
Total Comments Made:15223
FJ Points:20606

latest user's comments

#29 - Oh, well I sincerely apologize. I was never aware that I must …  [+] (2 new replies) 11/25/2013 on Bad breakup -1
User avatar #30 - herbolifee (11/25/2013) [-]
Trust me, be glad I know how natural it seems, but I've met enough people to know it really isn't for everyone.
User avatar #32 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
No, I will not be glad. People shouldn't be expected to go off the handle, they should be held to a higher standard. I've met people too, plenty of people to know that you're right, but that doesn't change the fact she should handle herself better.
#86 - I would actually disagree. You're more scared of a knife than …  [+] (2 new replies) 11/25/2013 on guns n shit -2
User avatar #92 - kelp (11/25/2013) [-]
Still murdering someone with a knife is the most cold hearted thing you can do. Like kyoutu mentioned, everyone can pull a trigger. But with a knife it really gets personal.
User avatar #151 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
Yes, because those deranged enough to engage in mass murders would have stopped if they could just see the fear and misery in their victims eyes.
#85 - Well of course you do...because the mass shootings occur in 'g… 11/25/2013 on guns n shit -1
#82 - You don't have a chance to. That's the thing about knives, the… 11/25/2013 on guns n shit -3
#80 - But you do get people running around with knives and swords an…  [+] (6 new replies) 11/25/2013 on guns n shit -2
User avatar #105 - rulebysecrecy (11/25/2013) [-]
people can kill a LOT more people with guns, before being stopped than with baseball bats, knives, etc.

Agreed people kill because they are screwed in the head.

However I dont like the sense of power guns instill on people. people like them way too much, regardless of intention, guns are still dangerous. imo.
User avatar #152 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
And they can be stopped a lot quicker with guns too. The point is that most people run, and in a crowded area, someone with only a machete could take out a lot of panicked people: as a matter or fact that already happened, and while I forget the actual death toll, it was well past 20 (it was in a foreign country).

That's not 'power', that's safety and confidence, that's the attitude someone has when they know nothing is really going to hurt them. Besides, what about the elderly? What about pregnant women? What about those who cannot properly defend themselves from the most horrid of criminals who, if only they had a better piece of protection, could have prevented something awful from happening to them?

Guns are dangerous, I absolutely agree, but ANYTHING is dangerous when used incorrectly, even pacifism.
User avatar #155 - rulebysecrecy (11/25/2013) [-]
well police and like forces sure, but they're trained to use fire arms. i believe that before anyone should ever be allowed to buy a gun they should be taught proper use and care. go buy your gun, but dont recieve it until you've successfully conpleted a safety course with at least an 80%. im canadian, and the death toll of over all homicides in toronto for 2013 is 53, that is not only with firearms. our gun control laws are definitely an effective method of keeping the homicide rate down. with more guns comes more homicide/injury. just because everyone has guns doesnt mean everyone is safer.
User avatar #156 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
While I do agree with you, I also think that if EVERYONE had a gun (and was also trained in its use and care), things would actually be a lot safer.

It's not just about guns themselves, guns are a massive selling point for smugglers. If more civilians were able to take care of themselves and make arrests then we could focus less on policing and more on investigation. And of course, I also believe crime rates and homicide rates itself would drop drastically, because those who do want to murder will know they will probably die before they even get a second shot in.

The thing is, many of the mass shootings that occur do so because the shooter WANTS there to be a large victim count, and many of the homicide/assault crimes occur because those doing the action do not believe they will be hurt themselves. If the risk of serious injury and death was always present in the mind of a criminal, they would be less likely to commit crime, simple.
User avatar #157 - rulebysecrecy (11/25/2013) [-]
I think we can agree that all crime is situational, if one were to commit a homicide by breaking and entering a home at 3am when everyone is sleeping it can be done so without or very little resistance. mass shootings at a mall or whatever can still occur, however there is security on site, and a homicidal criminal with intention to commit a mass shooting will still get the drop on unsuspecting people, guns or not if you are unready for an attck you are at a great disadvantage. in the time it takes to draw your firearm you could very well be among those injured. also the attacker with the surprise attack (if you will) immediately causes fear and panic among those innocent. everyone would need to be trained and on guard at all times for such an instance. thus costing a large sum of money to be paid by who? the hard working citizens? or the in-debt government? who would be willing to pay for the firearms and training.
User avatar #158 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
Hmm, but surely you must see that if more good people had guns, more bad people would be stopped in their actions! I can see where you're coming from, but I suppose I just think that people are more capable than that; after-all, you must remember that people are more confident with a gun, and everyone would want to be the hero who takes him down, so even a surprise assault would not kill many people, as multiple others draw their guns and fire.

Hmm, I think it should be paid out of the persons own pocket. After-all, with less police needed and less money going toward keeping guns illegal, we could lower tax dollars and give them back to the people who then use them for proper firearm buying and training, thus the money would go back into society. I'm not saying you should FORCE guns on people, good sir, I'm simply saying that more good people will get them than bad ones and thus guns should be easier to *acquire

*Provided you have no criminal record or history of mental illness, or anything really that would hint at you being a pscyho.
#15 - Eh, honestly...I never liked Death-Note that much. I know it's… 11/25/2013 on Behind you! -1
#14 - I know, I totally hate it when characters act like themselves.… 11/25/2013 on Behind you! -1
#8 - I love it when views on life and times come through general ho… 11/25/2013 on Quality Subs -2
#8 - I understand that just because you're a guy doesn't mean you h… 11/25/2013 on Was she hot? -1
#9 - Honestly, many of the sources actually vary. Some say 60 milli… 11/25/2013 on Why so serious? -2
#9 - It was the tone of his comment. 11/25/2013 on my life after school :( -2
#7 - *48,231,700 If you listen closely, you can hear the …  [+] (5 new replies) 11/25/2013 on Why so serious? -4
User avatar #8 - falloutfanatic (11/25/2013) [-]
No fair we had Russia on our side and they don't care about human life... It skewed the results, so i demand a redo
User avatar #32 - metalmind (11/25/2013) [-]
It's actually more than 48 million.
And even if you leave russia out, the numbers are still in our favor.
And daying that Russia has no respect for human right is just an excuse for them beeing really bad.
User avatar #38 - falloutfanatic (11/26/2013) [-]
i never said they have no respect for human rights... they have no respect for human life, completely different. Also we had china on our side as well to further skew the results.
User avatar #18 - itrooztrooperdown (11/25/2013) [-]
Technically, Russia is still having fun.
User avatar #9 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
Honestly, many of the sources actually vary. Some say 60 million like the post, others go as low as 40 million, while the highest I've seen is 75 million.

I personally think civilian deaths* shouldn't count on the toll, and then you'd have a more honest and less bias answer

*Provided the deaths of those civilians were NOT directly caused by the war. I don't want grandma joe being added in there just because she choked on a split-pea 5 seconds after Hitler came to power.
#91 - I remember once seeing this post here a long time ago, before … 11/25/2013 on Color Blindness Test +2
#5 - What the **** are you complaining about? You're l…  [+] (2 new replies) 11/25/2013 on my life after school :( +2
User avatar #7 - richardastley (11/25/2013) [-]
I missed the part where he complained.
User avatar #9 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
It was the tone of his comment.
#6 - Sometimes I wish I didn't have a nose so I wouldn't have snot … 11/25/2013 on He Now Nose Where It Is -1
#3 - My entire life I thought a signature was actually a person's n… 11/25/2013 on Doctor Font +2
#12 - Oh no, images were shared on an image-sharing site... … 11/25/2013 on Frank Stop +8
#21 - Alright, it seems a lot of people are upset in the comments se…  [+] (4 new replies) 11/25/2013 on Bad breakup -1
User avatar #28 - herbolifee (11/25/2013) [-]
That's called desperation. Be glad you never had to experience it like this girl.
User avatar #29 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
Oh, well I sincerely apologize. I was never aware that I must be glad for being a rational human being; I just thought it was something that came naturally. My mistake.
User avatar #30 - herbolifee (11/25/2013) [-]
Trust me, be glad I know how natural it seems, but I've met enough people to know it really isn't for everyone.
User avatar #32 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
No, I will not be glad. People shouldn't be expected to go off the handle, they should be held to a higher standard. I've met people too, plenty of people to know that you're right, but that doesn't change the fact she should handle herself better.
#16 - I was completely unaware that women discussed fat jokes while … 11/25/2013 on overweight Hitler +1
#6 - Women aren't friends with those who wear the same clothes beca…  [+] (2 new replies) 11/25/2013 on The Same Hat +20
#10 - Womens Study Major (11/25/2013) [-]
Plenty of women don't give a shit if they're wearing the same as somebody else.
User avatar #21 - captainfuckitall (11/25/2013) [-]
Not from what I've seen...
#7 - If the person got paid for it, I don't see a problem.  [+] (1 new reply) 11/25/2013 on Did he at least thank you? +1
User avatar #10 - childofnephilim (11/25/2013) [-]
For the most part, I agree. If the boss said "I don't care what you had planned after your shift was over, I must attend to this," then I would chagrin his disregard for another person's time and plans. There is also the possibility that the employee was salary.
#53 - I can confirm this, I was the guy who mugged him. 11/25/2013 on Unpopular Opinion Time +35
#27 - Don't worry about it. We Canadians can handle it, you just kee… 11/25/2013 on ca nah duh 0
#36 - It's not that Santa doesn't exist, he just stops coming when y…  [+] (1 new reply) 11/25/2013 on Dear Santa +6
#92 - tyroneisanigger (11/25/2013) [-]
Take this medal sir, god damn do you deserve it.
#34 - I'm a writer and I don't say anything. I just cry bec… 11/25/2013 on Boring. 0

Comments(483):

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User avatar #490 - commencingfailure ONLINE (09/30/2014) [-]
******* retard compares the IS to today's feminists. One could say ignorance is an everspreading cancer, you did your job to increase the spread.
User avatar #491 to #490 - captainfuckitall (09/30/2014) [-]
You seem REALLY mad, friend. Perhaps you should calm down and take some ass ointment before you need to see a doctor
User avatar #489 - myfourthaccount (07/18/2014) [-]
dude, you're like my most favorite person on earth right now haha
User avatar #487 - imvlad (05/04/2014) [-]
you brought shame to your house
User avatar #483 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Have you by chance had an older account here before?
User avatar #484 to #483 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Yes I have. My first username was Hiimquinn, but it was deleted for some reason I never found, so I just made another.
#485 to #484 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Oh. Never mind then. I saw someone call you Dave and I mistook you for someone else.
User avatar #486 to #485 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
It's fine. It was a joke from a picture a while back where a man was looking out the window and saw a dog and his owner walking down the street. The dog barked at another, bigger dog, and his owner just turned and said "See, this is why you have no ******* mates, Dave".
User avatar #481 - iforgotmyothername (03/20/2014) [-]
you are one cool tempered potato compared to me, bringing my fury upon your wrongness. i salute you, and thumbed up all your comments in the a capella debate.
User avatar #482 to #481 - captainfuckitall (03/20/2014) [-]
It's alright, I apologize for making you upset, but you don't need to thumb my posts up. Thumbs are a way to express positivity or negativity toward any type of comments; if you do not like them, it is perfectly within your right to thumb them down.
#480 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#479 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#478 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#477 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
#476 - lolollo ONLINE (03/08/2014) [-]
User avatar #474 - aherorising (11/20/2013) [-]
you're a really cool bro
#471 - shiifter (10/06/2013) [-]
This still makes me giggle.

Oh and by the way, i never actually thumbed you down. I just said that i did.
User avatar #472 to #471 - captainfuckitall (10/06/2013) [-]
The thing is, the way I found OUT you gave me those thumbs was because of the question mark, which allows people to see who voted on content. I could only KNOW it was you if you had thumbed them down, which you did.

And now you not only prove to be an idiot, but a liar as well.
#473 to #472 - shiifter (10/12/2013) [-]
Wait? You still remembered that? That's hilarious.

By the way, i screencapped this. it's like a trophy.
User avatar #468 - satrenkotheone (09/22/2013) [-]
I would just like to say thank you.
#466 - Womens Study Major (08/25/2013) [-]
Due to your pointlessly rude comment on the post "Jesus ain't got time for **** ",

I have gone through 20 of your previous comments and thumbed them all down.

You're also a stupid, unfunny, tryhard feelfag. Exactly the kind of user that this site is infamous for.
User avatar #467 to #466 - captainfuckitall (08/25/2013) [-]
I wasn't pointlessly rude. If you read it more carefully, you would find I am not insulting your god or faith, but rather, the people who spread it about; and even they are just doing it to themselves, while I am mearly making an observation

It's ironic you call me tryhard, considering you just went through the time to thumb-down my last 20 comments as if it would have any effect on me personally or my ranking here. It's also odd you call me stupid, considering you were the one who read it uncorrectly. And I think the fact I have so many comment thumbs anyways (including my own jesus comment) speaks to the point that I am, in fact, quite hilarious. "Feelfag", is that supposed to be a derogatory term for someone who is passionate about certain things? If so, then I take pride in it, as it is only through passion that things grow.

Considering you are pretentious, arrogant, immature, and without a sense of humour; you fit the criteria for '12 year old funnyjunker' far better than I do.
#463 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.   
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.   
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.   
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
User avatar #464 to #463 - captainfuckitall (07/16/2013) [-]
You are just a wonderful person, you know that? Thank you very much for your kind words and appreciation, and I'm glad you have made an account and made many friends here, including myself
#465 to #464 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
You're welcome, good sir.
You're welcome, good sir.
User avatar #461 - potgardener (06/01/2013) [-]
youre pretty ****** in the head if beating a kid is a good idea, parents would need to hit their kids if they taught them what was right and wrong from the beginning
User avatar #462 to #461 - captainfuckitall (06/01/2013) [-]
It's ironic how you talk about avoiding situations, when your very comment isn't needed considering I already explained, about five times now, that I do not mean you must 'abuse' your children in order to get good results. My comment, and all the comments afterwards, were about how when compassion and support fails you must turn to punishment and discipline, including simply smacking your kid upside the head

Perhaps you should read more and get better informed before jumping to opinions, yes?
#459 - bossdelainternet (05/11/2013) [-]
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest  threads i've seen this year.   
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...   
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
I'd just like to say thank you for created one of the funniest threads i've seen this year.
To sum up why i thought it was so funny, a quote...
"Most people would say 'I lost. I give up.', but you, you just keep trying. You're like the Dominican Republic, always killing the guy in charge and saying 'Ah, this new guy, this new guy's gonna get it right!'." - Family Guy
User avatar #460 to #459 - captainfuckitall (05/11/2013) [-]
I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult

I choose the former

Thank you, good sir
#453 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
I just thought I'd let you know that I just did an awful thing and quoted your majestic deep words of death wisdom onto my facebook. I gave you credit, but as part of my shame for stealing I thought I'd tell you. That was honestly one of the best things I've ever read.

Which is also why I screencapped it. Don't worry I swear I'm not going to try to get to frontpage with it I just wanted to save it.
User avatar #454 to #453 - captainfuckitall (11/12/2012) [-]
Not at all, I am not concerned with thumbs in the least. If you would like to post it, by all means do so, if you'd like to take credit, do so as well; I care not for material value or fame, as long as comprehend and understand the message
#455 to #454 - WhattheNorris (11/12/2012) [-]
Oh man you just keep getting better:)    
   
But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
Oh man you just keep getting better:)

But I wouldn't dare steal your credit.
#449 - captainspankmonkey (02/27/2012) [-]
Internet problems
That is why :P
User avatar #450 to #460 - captainfuckitall (02/27/2012) [-]
ahhh, haha, sorry then :P
#447 - Womens Study Major (09/26/2011) [-]
you're a lovely person
User avatar #448 to #458 - captainfuckitall (09/26/2011) [-]
awe, thank you, kind stranger :3

that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :D
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