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captainfuckitall

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Date Signed Up:4/12/2010
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Ranking:#9534
Comment Ranking:#505
Highest Content Rank:#9533
Highest Comment Rank:#49
Content Thumbs: 42 total,  99 ,  57
Comment Thumbs: 58189 total,  71178 ,  12989
Content Level Progress: 77.96% (46/59)
Level 0 Content: Untouched account → Level 1 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 74.5% (745/1000)
Level 352 Comments: Knight Of Funnyjunk → Level 353 Comments: Knight Of Funnyjunk
Subscribers:22
Content Views:10863
Times Content Favorited:13 times
Total Comments Made:16668
FJ Points:24977

latest user's comments

#18 - Who in their gentle heart could ever slap Winnie The Pooh!?!?  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on Wah-Wah-What the Fuck +2
#22 - willindor (04/23/2014) [-]
You mean aside from the church?
#60 - Even in the worst case where your scenario is correct, that's …  [+] (2 new replies) 04/23/2014 on Tumblr Stuff: People 0
User avatar #63 - kinginyellow (04/23/2014) [-]
Still, the horny boy thing shouldn't be an excuse for him to be a total asshat. If nudes matter enough for him to bitch about it like that then he's clearly not focused on what a real relationship is about.
User avatar #64 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
Well of course he's not focused on a relationship, because he's a horny boy. I'm not excusing his behaviour, good sir; he's still a prick, it's just not "Objectification".
#184 - Not at all, it's my fault anyways. It's just that from the maj… 04/23/2014 on New way to browse Tumblr +1
#61 - Actually, in Greek/Roman Mythology, Hades is a very nice perso…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on Hades ganna hade 0
User avatar #62 - ljlightfire (04/23/2014) [-]
i think that is exactly what i just said -.-
"at first did nothing wrong"
"death and everyone hating on you cant be helping that"
the only part thats different is the he wasnt a nice guy and that was aimed at the cartoon version of him which never shows an ounce of niceness
#6 - I love Sloths so much. They're so lazy.  [+] (3 new replies) 04/23/2014 on when you're too drunk to... +1
User avatar #26 - aangbingo (04/24/2014) [-]
Could you say they're "lazy"?
They consume less energy, so they move around less. Lazy is just wasting energy by lazing about.
I dunno mane, these questions keep me awake at night.
User avatar #29 - captainfuckitall (04/24/2014) [-]
They are lethargic!
User avatar #30 - aangbingo (04/24/2014) [-]
It's 4:13AM and I'm still thinking about this


maaaaaaaaaaan
Now I feel like a slotj
#179 - The difference is I do not genuinely think less of black peopl…  [+] (2 new replies) 04/23/2014 on New way to browse Tumblr +5
User avatar #182 - starblood (04/23/2014) [-]
Sorry, I was just rustled there for a second.
It's true that most racist comments on the internet are jokes
but don't generalize all of Tumblr as being white-hating
u cool dude
User avatar #184 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
Not at all, it's my fault anyways. It's just that from the majority of Tumblr Social Justice I've seen, they really don't like white people.

U cool too.
#31 - They're not nipples, they're actually receptors to sense chang… 04/23/2014 on My "Internal" alarm clock. +4
#10 - No better way to make a wedding memorable than to have it doub…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on George’s Other Profession +41
#19 - dontknowmeatall (04/23/2014) [-]
Or triple, or quadruple, or quintuple...
#20 - I'd let her get hit. **** me if I have a child with suc…  [+] (10 new replies) 04/23/2014 on dad level 9000 +46
User avatar #150 - chewiewhatawookie (04/24/2014) [-]
I know what i'd hit.
#90 - darkace (04/24/2014) [-]
I'm going out on a limb here and guessing your are not a father.
User avatar #126 - captainfuckitall (04/24/2014) [-]
Not at the moment, no. None of my previous children were fast enough.
User avatar #52 - avatarofavarice (04/23/2014) [-]
Her back was to it, you fuckwit.
I even know you are joking, but come on, man.
#140 - anonymous (04/24/2014) [-]
Can you maybe take a second look at the expanded gif and say her back was to it? Because it looks quite the opposite
User avatar #53 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
You can't hear something speeding down the hill at you? Or the people inevitably calling out to get you to move out of the way? Or the dad probably calling out to you too?
User avatar #55 - avatarofavarice (04/23/2014) [-]
She's a child, m8, they don't give a shit half the time.
User avatar #56 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
SO THE NEXT ONE I BREED WILL!!!!!
User avatar #65 - pokim (04/23/2014) [-]
hopefully you don't breed.
User avatar #67 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
I can always make more until I get it right
#20 - This is a wonderful way to abuse your partner without getting caught. 04/23/2014 on Domestic Abuse is FUN Abuse -2
#147 - Alright, whatever.  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on Fetch Nina, fetch 0
User avatar #148 - IamSofaKingdom (04/23/2014) [-]
Alright, whatever.
#48 - At first I thought "Wait, why would he do that? Wouldn't … 04/23/2014 on jellyfish sombrero 0
#13 - Well no, I mean Dolphins in general are very aggressive creatu…  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on well said 0
User avatar #15 - comicexplain (04/23/2014) [-]
So do chimps. That's not my point; most species are aggressive, sexually. And all are capable of rape. But aside from ducks, it's never more than half, and from the studies of rape-focused dolphin societies, it's only fifteen percent. Still a large amount, but as I said earlier, a minority.
#11 - Don't dolphins viciously rape whatever they can?  [+] (8 new replies) 04/23/2014 on well said 0
#18 - anonymous (04/23/2014) [-]
User avatar #12 - comicexplain (04/23/2014) [-]
No. Just certain ones. That's like saying "Don't humans viciously rape whatever they can". It's just a minority.

A very prominent minority.
#20 - tksparty (04/23/2014) [-]
#22 - lorddarkskull (04/23/2014) [-]
that's the picture I was thinking of
anyone have more of this style? all I have is this scorpion one
User avatar #16 - lorddarkskull (04/23/2014) [-]
found the dolphin
User avatar #17 - comicexplain (04/23/2014) [-]
Dammit.

Time to pack my bags.
User avatar #13 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
Well no, I mean Dolphins in general are very aggressive creatures, especially when it comes to sex. They even have sex trafficking clans.
User avatar #15 - comicexplain (04/23/2014) [-]
So do chimps. That's not my point; most species are aggressive, sexually. And all are capable of rape. But aside from ducks, it's never more than half, and from the studies of rape-focused dolphin societies, it's only fifteen percent. Still a large amount, but as I said earlier, a minority.
#10 - 1 star if you play on "Negro" edition  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on (untitled) +9
User avatar #47 - beheaded (04/23/2014) [-]
hate that version it felt like my money was stolen from it
#13 - Then you fart in the car and you blame it on him.  [+] (1 new reply) 04/23/2014 on Sound advice +146
User avatar #35 - asmathiel (04/23/2014) [-]
I FARTED OUTSIDE
#84 - Oh man, that looks so beautiful! I hope that one day we can fi… 04/23/2014 on PC master race 0
#15 - Looking at that picture, I can see why. 04/23/2014 on human why you do dis 0
#10 - When I was a child, I was genuinely terrified of this scenario. 04/23/2014 on all hail lord satin +2
#14 - I, too, want source  [+] (5 new replies) 04/23/2014 on what a twist! 0
User avatar #18 - spainisbad (04/23/2014) [-]
what was it?
User avatar #20 - captainfuckitall (04/23/2014) [-]
An anime girl giggling (covered) boobs up and down.

For future reference, scroll down and look to the bottom left corner of the page, you'll see the "Flag Moderators" button, and it will take you to the "Flagging" page, where you can see all the content that was flagged. Just look up the name of a user on the page and you'll see what they posted.
User avatar #21 - spainisbad (04/23/2014) [-]
Ooooh, ok. Thanks for the advice.
#26 - menorin (04/24/2014) [-]
would post again but has no sauce and i might get banned
pic unrelated. just too kawaii...
User avatar #27 - spainisbad (04/24/2014) [-]
Already saw the pic, don't worry. Thanks, anyway.
#42 - It's a good thing that girl took that picture when she did, be… 04/23/2014 on Very Bad Days, But Not For You +1
#27 - "Oh, look at that, the villain is making a speech about a… 04/23/2014 on How To Scare a Gamer 0
#57 - I guess even the worst of villains can still be bros on some level. 04/23/2014 on This is My Fetish +1
#7 - That that supposed to be a joke, or...a pun? 04/23/2014 on It's his fault for being... 0
#10 - It's because you're naturally a creep 04/23/2014 on This is casual, right? 0

Comments(507):

[ 507 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#513 - anonymous (02/16/2015) [-]
I thought I'd waste some time also, and FIX yo' thumbs ;)
#514 to #513 - anonymous (02/16/2015) [-]
Love, luluwho
#505 - thediablo (01/26/2015) [-]
Man, I think I love you
Man, I think I love you
User avatar #506 to #505 - captainfuckitall (01/26/2015) [-]
Haha, where the hell did that come from?
User avatar #507 to #506 - thediablo (01/26/2015) [-]
I saw that kind of argument that you had and I liked not only what you said but the way you said it, I think you did it pretty cool and everything

if you meant the gif it's from Soul Eater
User avatar #508 to #507 - captainfuckitall (01/26/2015) [-]
That's the first time I heard that. Generally, my abrasive and blunt speech drives most people to dislike me, not give me affection. You're a sweetheart, though.

Haha, no, I did not mean the gif.
User avatar #509 to #508 - thediablo (01/26/2015) [-]
I feel the same way about myself, I have to say that if those speeches were used against me I would feel a little bit upset, but you ask for clear answers and sources, and you try to make the other person think before they speak, I like that in general, not just mindless bashing ahaha
User avatar #510 to #509 - captainfuckitall (01/26/2015) [-]
Well I'm certainly glad you can see the good in my speaking skills. Frankly, I do it to get to the point. I hate having my time wasted for any reason, and so I extend that courtesy to others and try not to waste anyone else's time either; which leads me to being very blunt and brutal in my words so that they cannot be confused or misheard. Though I admit I was frustrated in that debate.
User avatar #511 to #510 - thediablo (01/26/2015) [-]
most of them are frustrating anyway

and yeah, it sucks when people start to get offtrack because of a single comment that you used as an example or something, it's proof that they are desperately trying to derail the conversation to their favor
User avatar #512 to #511 - captainfuckitall (01/26/2015) [-]
Oh well. When you get into a debate with someone, the point should be because you are trying to change your own views, not theirs.

If someone doesn't want to believe something, they won't. End of story. You could use all the proof you want to tell someone the colour of the sky is blue, but if they want it to be green, it will be and there's nothing you can do to stop it.

Thus, the only person you should be focused on changing in a debate is yourself, and only do so to get more perspective on the issues important to you.
User avatar #498 - gugek ONLINE (12/30/2014) [-]
Hey! Good afternoon. I hope the rest of your day is awesome and tomorrow is freaking fantastic!
#492 - miia ONLINE (12/13/2014) [-]
User avatar #494 to #492 - captainfuckitall (12/13/2014) [-]
Well aren't you a sweetheart for helping me get over my fear
#495 to #494 - miia ONLINE (12/13/2014) [-]
im actually about to go to bed but hi
User avatar #499 to #495 - aurumleo (01/08/2015) [-]
Who's the artist? Sauce?
User avatar #500 to #499 - miia ONLINE (01/08/2015) [-]
i dont remember and its too late for me to find out
reverse search it
#501 to #500 - aurumleo (01/08/2015) [-]
I found it! The artist's nukomasu. Thanks, Miia. If it weren't for that image, I won't find it.
User avatar #496 to #495 - captainfuckitall (12/13/2014) [-]
Well don't let me keep you. Hi back, and feel free to continue the conversation any time.
User avatar #503 to #502 - captainfuckitall (01/09/2015) [-]
Hello again.
#504 to #503 - miia ONLINE (01/09/2015) [-]
hello

i am exhausted
User avatar #490 - commencingfailure (09/30/2014) [-]
******* retard compares the IS to today's feminists. One could say ignorance is an everspreading cancer, you did your job to increase the spread.
User avatar #491 to #490 - captainfuckitall (09/30/2014) [-]
You seem REALLY mad, friend. Perhaps you should calm down and take some ass ointment before you need to see a doctor
User avatar #489 - myfourthaccount (07/18/2014) [-]
dude, you're like my most favorite person on earth right now haha
User avatar #487 - imvlad (05/04/2014) [-]
you brought shame to your house
User avatar #483 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Have you by chance had an older account here before?
User avatar #484 to #483 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
Yes I have. My first username was Hiimquinn, but it was deleted for some reason I never found, so I just made another.
#485 to #484 - aerosol (04/22/2014) [-]
Oh. Never mind then. I saw someone call you Dave and I mistook you for someone else.
User avatar #486 to #485 - captainfuckitall (04/22/2014) [-]
It's fine. It was a joke from a picture a while back where a man was looking out the window and saw a dog and his owner walking down the street. The dog barked at another, bigger dog, and his owner just turned and said "See, this is why you have no ******* mates, Dave".
User avatar #481 - iforgotmyothername (03/20/2014) [-]
you are one cool tempered potato compared to me, bringing my fury upon your wrongness. i salute you, and thumbed up all your comments in the a capella debate.
User avatar #482 to #481 - captainfuckitall (03/20/2014) [-]
It's alright, I apologize for making you upset, but you don't need to thumb my posts up. Thumbs are a way to express positivity or negativity toward any type of comments; if you do not like them, it is perfectly within your right to thumb them down.
User avatar #474 - aherorising (11/20/2013) [-]
you're a really cool bro
#471 - shiifter (10/06/2013) [-]
This still makes me giggle.

Oh and by the way, i never actually thumbed you down. I just said that i did.
User avatar #472 to #471 - captainfuckitall (10/06/2013) [-]
The thing is, the way I found OUT you gave me those thumbs was because of the question mark, which allows people to see who voted on content. I could only KNOW it was you if you had thumbed them down, which you did.

And now you not only prove to be an idiot, but a liar as well.
#473 to #472 - shiifter (10/12/2013) [-]
Wait? You still remembered that? That's hilarious.

By the way, i screencapped this. it's like a trophy.
User avatar #468 - satrenkotheone (09/22/2013) [-]
I would just like to say thank you.
#466 - anonymous (08/25/2013) [-]
Due to your pointlessly rude comment on the post "Jesus ain't got time for **** ",

I have gone through 20 of your previous comments and thumbed them all down.

You're also a stupid, unfunny, tryhard feelfag. Exactly the kind of user that this site is infamous for.
User avatar #467 to #466 - captainfuckitall (08/25/2013) [-]
I wasn't pointlessly rude. If you read it more carefully, you would find I am not insulting your god or faith, but rather, the people who spread it about; and even they are just doing it to themselves, while I am mearly making an observation

It's ironic you call me tryhard, considering you just went through the time to thumb-down my last 20 comments as if it would have any effect on me personally or my ranking here. It's also odd you call me stupid, considering you were the one who read it uncorrectly. And I think the fact I have so many comment thumbs anyways (including my own jesus comment) speaks to the point that I am, in fact, quite hilarious. "Feelfag", is that supposed to be a derogatory term for someone who is passionate about certain things? If so, then I take pride in it, as it is only through passion that things grow.

Considering you are pretentious, arrogant, immature, and without a sense of humour; you fit the criteria for '12 year old funnyjunker' far better than I do.
#463 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.   
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.   
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.   
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
Hey, I would just like to say thank you for telling me to get an account.
Yea I know, odd thing to give thanks for when I could have gotten one easily but then again, I was a dumb bastard then and could not think very well.
I notice your comments from time to time and get some good knowledge off of them, mainly the Lovecraft related ones.
But like I said, thank you very much and continue to be awesome.
User avatar #464 to #463 - captainfuckitall (07/16/2013) [-]
You are just a wonderful person, you know that? Thank you very much for your kind words and appreciation, and I'm glad you have made an account and made many friends here, including myself
#465 to #464 - captainspankmonkey (07/16/2013) [-]
You're welcome, good sir.
You're welcome, good sir.
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