Mah pure and strong waifu!

**joshlol sighs**

**caffeinecommissar pats Joshlol's back**

ah joshlol and caffeinecommissar
true love

Comrade Achmed, are you of silly? "Gommunism" is not of halal.

You need to login to view this link

the anti burger invasion is about to start

So on a website dedicated to free-speech, you go ahead and ban an entire country to improve the quality of the posts?

all is getting good

>free speech
>preventing a group from expressing themselves through free speech

That is like giving you a piece of bacon but assuring you that it is okay to eat because I made sure it was slaughtered accordingly to dhabihah.

yeah i know it is a ****** rule. im just messing around

Oh, if it is for the lulz then everything goes. Have fun.

Gonna sticky this comment for an hour while I might try to figure out how to get a bit if handle on this general situation that I am perhaps finding myself in.

Thank you for that valuable contribution to my general existence.

I have noted your request to " ******* end my miserable nonswedish life at once" and will carry out said request at a day, later to be specified.

Anything else I can do for you now?

whenever you feel like it. I can't wait to see it

norkas & presidentmoose
Thoughts?

byootiful 10/10 you've got my vote

Thanks.

that's so ******* awesome, holy ****

Feel free to upload it as content.

will do

Cool, just remember to say I made it. I don't want to upload spur-of-the-moment things like this as content myself (even if I made it), but I won't mind the recognition for making it.

www.funnyjunk.com/2016+campaign/funny-pictures/5331442/

Al right, saw you mentioned me in the description. We cool.

If you've any other ideas for anything graphical, , feel free to let me know.

I'm not good with drawing stuff myself so I mostly take things from the internet and put together which is why I say graphical: Signs, shields, emblems, posters and gifs... such as this one (should have used a different font though... or bigger text).

dude, that was golden. anything like that is ******* awesome. or maybe a comic series about how Moose is president and he decides to go to war with North Korea. Or how about President Moose sends over his personal military unit on a convert operation to kill kim jong un and in the end he'll be in his office and he'll be by himself look at his window with a 1000mile stare and the last sentence will say "like father, like son"

As I said, I can't draw, so that comic would look terrible and since I'd be using material found on Google, it would probably be very visually divergent from the average FunnyJunk comic.

I guess just surprise me, I'm sure it'll be great no matter what you decide you

Christ... seems like I can't dig my way out of this one, I'll see what I can do, but I'm busy with other stuff most of the time.

haha do as you will, my friend.

And why the **** not while we are at it. Admin does this constitute treason on some level?

Great, now I can save time by not washing my hair.

But now I have to throw out my shampoo.

Wait, I'll still have hair other places.

Everything is in order, proceed.

*pours minoxidil on caffy's crotch to make it grow into a 70's afro then pours a jar of fleas into it*

Oh, time to throw out my shampoo.

I really liked it.

hmmmm
*pours hair removal cream all over you so all hair including eyebrows an eyelashes fall out*

Are you trying to turn me into a snake-kin now? Didn't know you were a scale-fag.

id put on a blindfold and **** Medusa's snakey ass

as for you...now youre hairless ill cover you in wax and let brendon fraser use you as a surfboard

This just keeps getting better and better.

**konradkurze rolls 5**
is Caffy a homo

You still intend on giving me the D though?

Yo ecomp do you think you can still find a use for this thread or can I just go ahead and unpin it?

Not that I don't want it pinned, it just seems silly to have a discussion thread pinned with no discussing going on.

unpin it its k. are you going to be joining the game?

No, but I don't mind getting updated on the game.

Ready for geyming

Are you there, caff?

ecomp feelythefeely
Sorry, I saw ecomp's posts at a bad time and didn't get around to read them later. A bit ironic following my own complaints.

I'll read them before submitting this post, but I have to withdraw from GMing any upcoming Nationbuilder games, but I'm still open to help developing the rules.

Regarding the proposal put forth by Ecomp, I don't see any apparent flaws or anything other than the complexity, but that can be dealt with.

Dang, that sucks. It's okay though, take your time.

caff, answer pls

ecomp feelythefeely
Sorry, I saw ecomp's posts at a bad time and didn't get around to read them later. A bit ironic following my own complaints.

I'll read them before submitting this post, but I have to withdraw from GMing any upcoming Nationbuilder games, but I'm still open to help developing the rules.

Regarding the proposal put forth by Ecomp, I don't see any apparent flaws or anything other than the complexity, but that can be dealt with.

Okay, well both thanks for the feedback, and dang for you not being able to co-host.

My most sincere apologies indeed , but my offer to help with the rules still stands if you still desire my help. Like feelythefeel I will however send out a mass-message, doubtful how many will respond to it, but I'll be optimistic for once (stupid choice, but even I can do moronic stuff once in a while).

Either way, if there is any other way I can help, feel free to tell me.

So what do you plan to do about it?

I'm looking for another host, but i dunno who else there is.

I sent out an MM, hopefully that'll help.

what. To whom?

A mass message. It goes to all of my friends, so "whom" would be four-hundred and forty-six accounts.

..... What was the message...

You would've gotten it, you should be able to read it yourself.

I didn't get nothing

Huh, weird. I guess it takes a while for FJ to update that stuff. Well here's a transcript.

Anybody interested in tabletop style games, have image editing programs like GIMP (Or at least be really good at Paint) and free some time on your hands? ecomp is looking for more hosts of our Nation Builder game. Even if you already know you can't host he's still looking for people interested in playing. If you meet the requirements and are interested, contact ecomp here ( www.funnyjunk.com/user/ecomp ) and he'll tell you more. Thanks.

apparently senortanto just got it, but I still haven't recieved it. Must take a while to get through all of those PMs

I suppose. What does he think?

he called me a fag

oh well

yep. Tell me if anyone's interested.

It is.

I still haven't recieved it

That's really weird.

Yeye

If you're okay with GMing the second hotspot, and you're okay with all of my new rules,
I think we can get started pretty soon.

Let's do it, then.

but now caff has gone awol

He hasn't disappeared, he's made comments recently. He just hasn't answered.

cuz hes gay

lel

So are we gonna start this or what? What should be the first hotspot? I suggest Mesopotamia simply because that was the world's first hotspot.

I agree. I'll be starting in the Nile, though, so hopefully we can get that hotspot started early.

I can agree to Mesopotamia (or Levant) being a good starting area, picture related.

But before we start the nationbuilder games - and I think ecomp is the one in charge here so I'm waiting for his "signal" we should probably try to find a few more GMs so we can add more hotspots quickly.

Let's see:
>Need GMs
>Need standardised expansion rules (e.g one GM has expansion being slow and another has expansions being fast).
>Need standardised rolling (Example given: 1-2=Major failure, 3-4=Minor failure, 5-6=Average, 7-8=Minor success and 9-10=Major success).
>Have a map and cut it into the different hot spots, also how to de do the projection? After having learned about the Dysmaxion method (more on that in the next comment) I'm tempted to use that since it has the least distortion.

Picture related, this is the Dysmaxion way to project maps, it is rather unconventional and has the least distortion. I can easily understand why we would not use it (I mean; look at it? Players would think sailing from Australia to Antarctica would be infeasible), but again it has the least distortion, which with the different hotspots could solve a problem we haven't realised we might have.

E.g Scandinavia in some map projections become enormous while in others become very small, and Scandinavia would probably end up being a hotspot.

I don't agree with using that map. It would be confusing and less satisfying to use. I personally loved that map with the regions that you could just use the fill tool on.

Ah yes, the one I uploaded was a blank map from the Paradox game "Victoria: Revolutions" (brilliant game, the kind where you need two computers to run it; one for the actual game and another for a MS Excel spreadsheet).

It brings a couple of pros and cons.

Pros:
1. Less photoshoppy for the GMs as long as they save it as a PNG.
2. Expansion as an action can be eliminated and instead give the players an option to take over as many territories as they have armies per turn (similar to how RISK functions).
3. The possibility of each province providing with a +1 to a specified stat per round.

Cons:
1. The borders in North America, Australia and to a lesser extend Africa and Siberia: Too linear; An Apace/Arapaho/Cheyenne/Pueblo/Shoshone/Ute inspired nation covering present-day Colorado most likely wouldn't be a square no matter how hip it is to be square.
2. In addition, these maps tends to be made with basis in real life historical divisions. For some of the nations having historical borders would in some cases make more sense than in others: E.g schnizel's Bosnia would probably revel in the ability to have entirely historical borders, conversely my own Carnica with no basis in historical accuracy ( I mean, rolled up the nation wanting to play "Not!Australia if Australia has been discovered by semi-fascistic Irishmen" without using Irish symbols.) it would seem weird to have historical borders since it is an ahistorical country. For a country that could be suitable either way would be noalternative's Vahanaka; Based on various pre-colonist states in Hindustan/Ancient-India but masterfully crafted in such a way it would not seem that out of place in a real life time line (I helped him make the flag and used the flag for Mysore as a basis but changed the colours to blues and added an emblem he found with a typical Hindu motif with slight elements of Buddhism). A nation like Vahanaka could swing either way.
3. Fluid borders enables us to have expansion being based on rolls and thus the ability to add the stat "Infrastructure" which in turn adds more complexity to the game; adding provinces either means we have to make a set boundary for success and fail for taking over a province, however we could have that boundary fixed to be natural 10 to take over a province if you have no infrastructure and have that boundary lowered as players develop better and better infrastructure.

That being said, IIRC ecomp is against using these "RISK-styled" maps where as I'm fine with using it if we reach a consensus, but by default I prefer the fluid map mode since I'm of the impression that is par for the course when it comes to Nationbuilder games.

Also, I'd recommend using a map from a more recent game than "Victoria: Revolutions" (it is almost a decade old by now). I have found to more recent maps:
img689.imageshack.us/img689/2088/iot7.png (from "The Darkest Hour: A Hearts of Iron Game", 2011)
i377.photobucket.com/albums/oo219/CanOmer/V2_Blank_Sea.png~original (from "Victoria II", 2010)
For added keks, please note that they've included Hala'ib but not Bi'r Tawīl.

( Wrote this earlier, but there was an error (cloudflare issues) so I copy pasted it to notepad, forgot to post it until now. )

And of course I forgot the picture.

1.) I've always been an advocate of keeping people to the old world starts, but I realize that that idea is unpopular.
2.) It's based on historical divisions, but it doesn't have to be used tat way. As an example, I've made this example nation. It looks convincingly like a real nation, but it's completely made up.

Meanwhile in America the borders are more of a mess.

Anyway, if you are going to run a game yourself though, I won't be the one to complain about how you do it as longs as the players like it.

Update? Any news?

Status on the game? Call me Paul Baumer, 'cause it is all quiet on this front.

Haven't heard a word from ecomp - I think he is busy getting trolled by and counter-trolling syrianassassin - but to be fair I have no clue, so I'm focusing on prepping for an IRL setting for PnP RPs (Pathfinder* in particular) that I'll hopefully run a few games for FJ as well once I'm done with the setting, and by setting I mean fluff and by fluff I mean that I've entered the stage of perfectionism where I realise what I need to do to be happy with it myself. It is a **** load of work and it might take longer than anticipated before I can present anything of value to dndexplain - however I did take the time to make this little gem, a three dimensional political compass based on the one used in Max Berry's online game "NationStates" only I haven't decided what benefits each direction gives.

It is however also something that can be used for nationbuilders, I'm thinking if we have at least six stats each end of this spectrum can represent a different stat.
Let's have a run down.
X-axis (left/right): Economical freedom - on the left "laissez faire" and on the right "planned economy".
Y-axis (up/down): Personal freedom - on the top "traditionalism" and on the bottom "Frankfurt School".
Z-axis (front/back): Political freedom - in the front "freedom of speech" and in the back "totalitarianism".

I should probably have it fixed so that planned economy (e.g Communism) is on the left and laissez faire (e.g Capitalism) is on the right.

Other than that, I'm thinking if each extreme end represents a stat, it will give a +2 to that stat while the other end will give +2 to a different stat. Being in the middle presents a +1 to both stats to keep it balanced.

E.g the X-axis, laissez faire would give you +2 economy and planned economy would give you +2 infrastructure per turn while a neutral would have +1 economy and +1 infrastructure.

This can either be a modifier, or it can mean they each turn have that added to their stat-counts.

I'm also thinking if we make it a 5-point scale going from -7 to +7 on each axis (-7, -6, -5, -4 or -3 = +2 to X stat / -2, -1, 0, +1 or +2 = +1 to X stat and +1 to Y stat / +3, +4, +5, +6 or +7 = +2 to Y stat) we can allow players to role play their nations development by allowing them to move a certain amount of points in any direction (except diagonal) in any direction per turn and that these relocation-points can be saved up over time (e.g: Carnica doesn't change politically for 7 turns but then suddenly roleplays a coup r'etard d'etat they spend all their points at once).

Additionally we can have each nation start out either "neutral" [0, 0, 0] or allow players to pick their own starting place.

Why yes, I do have way too much time on my hands.

Literally the only problem I have with this is "Freedom of Speech". Maybe try finding something that describes freedom in general (Or whatever the opposite of totalitarianism is). Other than that, you're doing perfect. Can't wait to see this take off.

Any other suggestions? It is kind of hard to find the motivation to do anything when all I get is ideas for things to change and not things to add.

That and 1/3rd of the team goes awol. :-/

I like it. To simplify it, we could just use the actual terms of the Political Ideologies. Mixed in this post is some more remodelling of the game that I've done. Note that I've taken away discovering technology and inventions completely to instigate more Roleplaying.

X: Capitalism - Communism
Y: Democracy - Autocracy
Z: Totalitarianism - Anarchism

Each side could affect different stats with a +/- system.

Capitalism gets + Finance but - Infrastructure, while Communism gets vice-versa
Democracy gets + Stability but - Efficiency, while Autocracy gets vice-versa
Totalitarianism gets + Authority but - Freedom, while Anarchism gets vice-versa

Accordingly, Their will be 6 main stats + Economy, Military, and Happiness
Finance - Multiplier for Economy Stat
Infrastructure - Multiplier for Expansion rolls
Stability - Multiplier for Civil War Power
Efficiency - Multiplier for non-war/non-expansion rolls
Authority - Multiplier for war rolls
Freedom - Multiplier for State Happiness

Each stat will be between -3 and +3, with each degree in each direction effecting each stat by a multiplier from 0.7 to 1.3. At the beginning of every turn, you will be provided with 5 numbers. The first two will be Economy and Military, the other 3 will be the scale of which you sway to each axis. -3 is the leftmost, downmost, and backmost position on the axis, while +3 will be the rightmost, upmost, and frontmost position on the axis.

Example
E12, M8, H15, -2,1,3
this means you have an economy stat of 12 (this has been adjusted to 12 from 10 from the Finance stat), a military stat of 8, and you lean 2 points towards Capitalism (1.2 multiplier for Economy stat, and 0.8 multiplier for expansion rolls), 1 point towards Autocracy (0.9 multiplier for Civil War Power, 1.1 multiplier for non-military rolls) and 3 points towards Totalitarianism (1.3 multiplier for military rolls, 0.7 multiplier for State Happiness)

Some other things to be explained
Civil War Power - When a new player wants to make their country inside another country, there is a civil war. The land owned by this new country equals New Countries Stability multiplier / (2 + Original Countries Stability multiplier), and the military will also be split up as such.
Ex. The original country has 1000 pixels of land. It leans 3 towards Autocracy, which means it's multiplier is 0.7. The new country wants to be a very democratic country, and it leans 3 towards Democracy, which means it's multiplier is 1.3. The Equation will look like this 1.3/(2 + 0.7). When you do the equation, (1.3/2.7), you see that the new country ends up with 48.1% of the old countries land, which means the new country will have 481 pixels in it, and the old country will have 519 pixels in it. In comparison, if the Old country was very Democratic, and the new one was Autocratic, it would be (0.7/3.3), which means the new country would only take 21.2% of it's land, which means it would only start with 212 pixels of land, and the old country would have 788 pixels of land.

The old country can then decide if it wants to retake some of it's land, or let it be, and the new country has to decide if it wants to take more of the old countries land or not.

Expansion rolls - Expansion takes place like this. For each point that was rolled for an expansion attempt, the player gains 2 pixels of space. The amount of pixels gained is modified by the multiplier. If a player rolled 5, and had a multiplier of 0.7, the player would get 7 total pixels in the expansion. As I am normalizing technology growth to make it less important in this new game, the amount of pixels gained per point will slowly grow over time.

State Happiness - For a Civil War to take place, the country itself has to be in turmoil in the first place. Players can take actions to improve their State Happiness in the form of rolls. They can either make another country less happy, or make their own country more happy. The top 20% happiest countries (in the entire game, not just hotspot) cannot be dragged into a Civil War, and the bottom 20% (in the entire game) get a penalty of 0.5 to their Civil War Power. (instead of NewMultiplier/(2 + OldMultiplier), it becomes NewMultiplier/(1.5 + OldMultiplier)

Any Questions? feelythefeel caffeinecommissar

It seems like it might be a bit complicated for newcomers, but it would be fine if you can explain it well to them. Along with my idea in number #441, why not slowly widen the +/- system over the course of the game? Start with tribes and cheifdoms, then open up to things like feudalist systems and merchant republics before eventually making your way to modern systems like communism and modern democracy?

The flaw in that logic is that modern day systems like Democracy and Communism have been around forever. As an example, Plato wrote about Communism (though not by that name) in 380 BC in his writing "The Republic", or the Mazdak movement in 5th Century Persia. Or in terms of Democracy, Ancient Athenian Democracy was founded in 500 BC, and other examples stretch throughout history like the Holy Roman Empire, and the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth.

When people start the game, they choose their political XYZ. They are able to change their government style with rolls, changing it by 1 point in a single direction per success.

Fine, I suppose.

So maybe ideologies and such could be unlocked via circumstance and fluff?

Or we could just let players develop their own nations? I put in a means of changing ideology, and I put in a reason to change ideology. This game is supposed to be about the players and building a FICTIONAL world of nations. If you can make a better system that I can agree to, I'd be glad to use it instead.

They could have been, but with the culture and setting of the time they probably would have been completely different people.

The same sort of circumstances could have happened in their life to form a Soviet Union of sorts. I mean, the Mazdak movement certainly happened, and it was certainly a communist regime.

I understand that, I just don't think having a 5th century USSR makes sense.

Why? Could Karl Marx and Vladimir Lenin not have been born in 8th Century BC?

On top of what I just said, maybe bonuses/abilities based on hotspots and/or fluff?

"Freedom of Thought" - you're allowed to have your own opinion regardless of how moronic it is.

Better?

It's certainly better. Another thing, I mentioned limiting ideologies and such that don't make sense for certain eras and such (Like medieval communists) because I planned to play with ideologies in a way that makes more sense. What are your thoughts, especially with this tying in?

By keeping it vague - using umbrella phrases like "planned economy" as opposed to merely calling it "communism" I hope to achieve just that. In a sense feudalism was a planned economy too.

But in the last games we had ancient communist states. They were literally communist. Are we going to do anything about that?

I think it is one of the things we'll need to have sorted out once we have more than three two people on the "development team". I definitely see the issue, but I couldn't care less because I'm in favour of ahistorical games.

Okay. Thanks for your hard work.

yet he never came back

Picture related: It's you.

You seem a bit skinny though, did ISIS feed you properly?

yeah

Judging from your weight loss it must have been Gefilte Fish.

Remind me again... ISIS stands for Israeli State In Syria, right?

Forgot my silly little footnote:

*Making it for a game of pathfinder, but the setting should be usable in all kinds of games with the proper adjustments.

ecomp

We were talking about hotspots and other logistics of the new system.

I think we were talking about multiple people hosting the game.

I know, you're the only one honest enough to remind me how much of a blight on this world I am.

I really appreciate it though.

All the homo.

You just called me a faggot AND a cunt? You've just made up for the missed day.

Didn't realise you were only going to keep going for as long as I kept responding.

How the **** am I supposed to be motivated enough to kill myself now?

>Senpai doesn't love me any more.

Writing up the story on your profile ~ Yes, I called you "senpai", you're twelve years my senior. If that doesn't make you "senpai", I need a Danish-Japanese dictionary to find out what "senpai" actually means.

Senpai
It originates from anime and manga. It's someone older than you. Someone you look up to. If they give the slightest attention to you, you sort of explode. They are just really admired by you and if you are a senpai, bask in it!

>Older than me.
Check.
>I look up to you.
Check.
>I get a fuzzy feeling when you pay attention to me.
...
Well, you don't ask for my opinion on religion like Syrianassassy, we don't talk about drugs like Turtly and you don't have any extremist opinions like Schnizzy.

So to be honest, I have no idea why you need or want me as your friend. I guess that is why I get a bit of a fuzzy feeling when you write to me.

That... and the original "Caffeine Commissar" persona is supposed to work for the East German NVA.

So check.

Yeah, I guess you are senpai on a platonic level.

i cant even remember how we meet, but given that yorue a sane and rational person in this *********** of a site, yorue worth keeping

By the way, your profile isn't public, right?

Good to hear, though most of the time I think I'm slowly losing my sanity. Rest assured I have no plans to unfriend you.

Who doesn't need an Ostalgic person on their friend list anyway?

I almost thought you had forgotten, I'm really relieved. Thanks for yet another daily reminder.

Love you bae.

I love this arrangement already.

This is even better than expected, keep up the good work.

Good to hear, haven't had the ball to kill myself yet, but with a daily remind my desire to live on will vanish before we realise it.

I'm a busy man, no need to give me a call. I can wait for your messages on my profile instead.

That is all I need, a bit of honesty.

#r00d Not offering me any marshmallows that is. I'm pretty used to people wanting me to burn to death by now.

i never said i wouldnt share, of course since youre helping to get some

and some smores

In that case keep the fire burning as the world is turning, and invite as many people as possible.