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latest user's comments
|#171 - Picture [+] (1 new reply)||05/07/2014 on sneaky american dad writing||0|
|#112 - France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back… [+] (5 new replies)||05/07/2014 on sneaky american dad writing||+2|
|#111 - If WWI was a bar fight (not mine): Germany, Austria a… [+] (9 new replies)||05/07/2014 on sneaky american dad writing||+3|
#160 - mrmcput (05/07/2014) [-]
If WWII was a bar fight (Mine)
>Germany, Italy and Japan are all sitting in a bar.
>An extremely drunk Japan boastfully claims that the three of them can take on every guy in the room, both Germany and Italy agree with Japan.
>To prove how tough he is, Japan gets up, staggers over to China an socks him in the jaw as hard as he could, knocking him to the floor, China gets up to fight back, but his multiple personality disorder prevents him from putting up an effective fight.
>Everybody in the bar stops to look at what's happening, but quickly go back to their business. Eventually, as the fight dragged on, America went over to the bartender and told him that he should cut Japan off, as Sake made him violent and aggressive. This infuriated Japan who started plotting revenge.
>Germany, still angry over the lost of the first bar fight, goes over to the Russia and whispers something in his ear. They both get up and walk over to Poland, Germany knocks Poland back and the Russia clotheslines him.
>Britain and France shout to Germany that they're gonna kick his ass again, but do nothing to help their friend.
>Germany, Britain and France all sit down and glare at each other from across the room while Russia tries to bully Finland but gets a bloody nose.
> Germany unexpectedly gets up and goes around the room, knocking out Norway, Belgium, the Netherlands, and Luxembourg. He turns his attention to France and after a short fight, France is knocked unconscious and Britain is forced to fall back.
> Italy, wanting some of the glory for himself tries to pick a fight with Greece and ends up getting his ass kicked. Germany, beginning to wonder why they became friends in the first place, beats up Greece and saves Italy's ass.
> Pissed off over getting his ass kicked by Greece, Italy notices Britain hanging out with some North African countries, wanting them as friends too, Italy tries to hit Britain but is blocked, and punched in the Kidneys.
#178 - mrmcput (05/07/2014) [-]
>Italy cries out for Germany to help him, again, and he comes over and starts a long drawn out fight without either side winning much, though Germany seems to have a slight advantage.
> Germany, deciding he was sick of Russia's shit, gets a gang together to fight Russia's gang, the Soviet Union. Germany walks over to Russia and uppercuts him in the jaw, knocking him to the floor, and the two gangs start to fight.
> Meanwhile, the US is tossing empty bottles and pool cues to Britain and Russia when Japan walks up behind him and smashes a sake bottle over his head, screaming "Teno heika banzai!" America is knocked to the ground, but not unconscious.
> The fight isn't going well for the Soviet Union as Germany's gang is getting the upper hand, but Germany is starting to get exhausted from all the fighting, and Russia starts to fight harder.
> With Germany's back turned fighting the Soviet Union, Britain wins back North Africa with help from America.
> They both turn towards Italy who surrenders almost immediately, which disgusted the Germans.
> America runs back and forth across the room, alternating between punching Japan and Germany, by this point Japan has hit China so hard that he got over his multiple personality disorder and starts to fight effectively.
> By this point The Soviet Union has almost destroyed Germany's gang, and most of them have either run off or given up entirely. Russia, Britain, and the US all gang up on Germany, and Russia finishes the fight by smashing a bar stool over his head.
> Japan keeps fighting but is obviously losing. America, deciding that the fight needs to end now, pulls out a revolver and points it at Japan. He tells Japan to stop and to give up peacefully, Japan refuses and America shoots him in the leg, he asks Japan again and gets the same answer, so America shoots him in his other leg. Japan gives up then, but Russia runs over to Japan and punches him in the stomach and claims victory for himself.
#112 - boobpube (05/07/2014) [-]
France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.
Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.
America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.
By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany’s fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.
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|#70 - **boobpube rolled image ** my life in a picture||04/28/2014 on (untitled)||+1|
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|#72 - My wife is due our first baby in 6 weeks, while some of these … [+] (2 new replies)||04/25/2014 on Joys Of Parenthood||0|
#74 - fables (04/25/2014) [-]
If you don't let them have every toy that they want and punish them for tantrums, and raise them with good morals, kids will more than likely turn out alright. I think most kids that end up being total dickbags are that way because they grew up seeing mom and dad worship money, and were allowed anything and everything that they wanted.
Personally, I don't think a 15 year old needs a $100 pair of jeans or an Iphone. But a lot of parents will buy that for their kids out of guilt or because they want them to have things they never had. It ruins a kid.
Also, congrats on becoming a father.
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|#5 - If he goes too close to the edge, I imaging he'll go down like…||04/04/2014 on this makes me uncomfortable||+8|
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|#28 - Comment deleted||04/03/2014 on Towel animals||0|
|#162 - Picture||04/02/2014 on Stay classy internet||+12|
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|#678 - Comment deleted||03/28/2014 on FJ March 27th Update||+2|
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|#126 - Comment deleted||03/20/2014 on The truth has been spoken||0|
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