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Gender: male
Date Signed Up:3/23/2010
Last Login:12/22/2014
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Content Thumbs: 17016 total,  19411 ,  2395
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Level 216 Content: Comedic Genius → Level 217 Content: Comedic Genius
Comment Level Progress: 58.1% (581/1000)
Level 321 Comments: Covered In Thumbs → Level 322 Comments: Covered In Thumbs
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Times Content Favorited:1277 times
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Favorite Tags: difference (5) | Men (5) | women (5) | Anime (4) | facebook (4) | slowpoke (4) | fail (3) | fate (3) | Inception (3) | night (3) | Penis (3) | Pokemon (3) | stay (3) | evangelion (2) | Katawa (2) | Shoujo (2) | Toradora (2) | why (2)
Good day! Before you ask, yes, I am a real Wumbologist. My name is Patrick Star (Dr. Star to you) and I am a professor of Wumbology at the Star School of Wumbology at Princeton University. I also do research regarding wumbo factors.
If you wish to attend my lecture series, shoot me an email at p.star@princeton.edu
Also, my fiancee is Sjorin, so keep your hands off him.

Rule set for King of the Hill can be found here:

latest user's comments

#107 - Man I just looked up so many color blind tests **** you  [+] (1 new reply) 06/19/2014 on every fucking time +2
User avatar #108 - whiterabit (06/19/2014) [-]
Maybe it could be that I'm colorblind. I have been hearing that from people my whole life after all
#69 - guys the color of the chart and the color su…  [+] (3 new replies) 06/19/2014 on every fucking time +4
User avatar #84 - whiterabit (06/19/2014) [-]
...yes they do?
User avatar #107 - Wumbologist (06/19/2014) [-]
Man I just looked up so many color blind tests fuck you
User avatar #108 - whiterabit (06/19/2014) [-]
Maybe it could be that I'm colorblind. I have been hearing that from people my whole life after all
#184 - The problem is the way most people attempt to lose weight. Mos… 06/19/2014 on this guy is a fucking champion +8
#213 - Turns out this is a shirt. 06/19/2014 on Loud, Crazy, and Packing... +2
#210 - Sometimes they are--but a (good) author doesn't add truly mean… 06/19/2014 on Literature class in a Nutshell +1
#131 - Where do I begin? 1. The point of The Raven is not …  [+] (3 new replies) 06/19/2014 on Literature class in a Nutshell +3
User avatar #165 - theejoshster (06/19/2014) [-]
yeah but like.....what if the curtains were just blue?
User avatar #210 - Wumbologist (06/19/2014) [-]
Sometimes they are--but a (good) author doesn't add truly meaningless details. Everything, down to the color of the curtains, exists so as to create a convincing world for the story to take place in.
#142 - supermanon (06/19/2014) [-]
Fuck your shit.

I didn't intend for my literary work to symbolize my opinions to everything you just said, but my literary work must stand on its own.
#27 - The internet says it so it must be true 06/17/2014 on Weasly willy 0
#179 - Picture  [+] (1 new reply) 06/17/2014 on Dear whales, THIS is what... +1
User avatar #201 - namdelliks (06/17/2014) [-]
Truth=Downvotes. Remember that Wumbologist.
#31 - Picture 06/15/2014 on euphoric to the max +6
#79 - This content is literally just a massive spoiler. I like Clann…  [+] (2 new replies) 06/14/2014 on Dirty things 0
User avatar #116 - stormietheraver (06/14/2014) [-]
its not that big of a spolier, theres much bigger events that happen
User avatar #86 - makotoitou (06/14/2014) [-]
It's kinda obvious. Like, did you really think it wouldn't happen?
#290 - "Been dazed and confused for so long it's not true."… 06/14/2014 on dhbjadbjkadaklsdn SCATMAAAN 0
#131 - I just watched it on Nickelodeon's website. Completely free HD… 06/13/2014 on Trailer in comments +5
#70 - Would you happen to have a source for this? Genuinely curious.  [+] (3 new replies) 06/10/2014 on Its not gay guys 0
User avatar #104 - shemales (06/11/2014) [-]
Ogi Ogas, "A Billion Wicked Thoughts" | Talks at Google

He starts talking about shemale porn at 21:35, but i recommend watching the entire thing. It's quite interesting.
User avatar #85 - megamolester (06/10/2014) [-]
i can't find something quickly, but it was a video about a researcher who wrote a book about that whole stuff (scan't remember the name of the book either)
User avatar #84 - megamolester (06/10/2014) [-]
there was a video on youtube, let me see if i can find it
#172 - It really depends on what genre you're looking for: A…  [+] (1 new reply) 06/10/2014 on well shit +1
#176 - Tarquillaman (06/10/2014) [-]
Thank you very much, like I said, I'm interested in anime, I just need a jumping-off point, i'll definitely look into these.
#103 - You watched this with your dad? 06/09/2014 on Kill La Kill According To... +1
#121 - "This is an extreme thirst." 06/09/2014 on well shit +22
#23 - In response to your question 06/09/2014 on scott +1
#8 - I too have a Wallace reaction pic  [+] (3 new replies) 06/08/2014 on scott +39
User avatar #14 - sanguinemybrother (06/08/2014) [-]
He looks almost fucking indentical to my little brother. Granted he's only 13, but Jesus that's some scary shit.

does this make my brother gay?
#23 - Wumbologist (06/09/2014) [-]
In response to your question
#12 - mastercolossus (06/08/2014) [-]
that dude was the best casting in the movie imo.
#42 - Related 06/08/2014 on Hi I'm paul 0
#1674 - **Wumbologist rolls 635,165,006** 06/07/2014 on Highest roll gets red... 0
#21 - Picture 06/06/2014 on *Scooooot +94
#96 - Health Care Triage is everything wonderful about youtube. 06/06/2014 on (untitled) +2
#115795 - Soundcloud thread? Share your profiles and have others gi… 06/05/2014 on Music - new music, hip hop... 0
#1442 - Good to be back 06/02/2014 on Girls, post your selfie! +1
#1375 - Now that you mention it, I think I have. ... With the …  [+] (2 new replies) 06/02/2014 on Girls, post your selfie! +2
User avatar #1432 - sunnysight (06/02/2014) [-]
I think that's what gave it away.

Welcome back, yo
#1442 - Wumbologist (06/02/2014) [-]
Good to be back
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User avatar #148 - soundofwinter ONLINE (06/24/2014) [-]
**** you
User avatar #149 to #148 - Wumbologist (06/24/2014) [-]
I knew you were a good man.
User avatar #143 - suikerpapa (04/20/2014) [-]
yo, wumbo. Want me to spread those tracks around a bit for you?
I could get you some feedback if you get a soundcloud and post them there
User avatar #144 to #143 - Wumbologist (04/20/2014) [-]

I'd actually appreciate that a lot! I made a soundcloud with my tracks.
User avatar #147 to #144 - suikerpapa (04/20/2014) [-]
also, if you reeeaaally wanna get feedback, go around soundcloud, and /mu/ soundcloud threads and check out a bunch of people's tracks and give feedback and a follow and they'll do the same. You'll be surprised at how helpful they can be for a 4chan subcommunity
User avatar #146 to #144 - suikerpapa (04/20/2014) [-]
Keep track of these threads, maybe people'll give feedback in-thread instead of on SC
You need to login to view this link
You need to login to view this link
You need to login to view this link
User avatar #145 to #144 - suikerpapa (04/20/2014) [-]
I got over 60 followers on soundcloud, and I get plays every day even though I haven't uploaded in months,
gimme a few days and I'll get you some proper feedback
User avatar #140 - revengeforfreeze (04/10/2014) [-]
wumbologist, pierce me
User avatar #133 - holeymoley (09/29/2013) [-]
"When he isn't writing incredibly nerdy articles, you can find him telling stupid jokes, studying Chinese, playing music, or taking really long walks around campus in the middle of the night because he thinks his life is an anime."

User avatar #134 to #133 - Wumbologist (09/29/2013) [-]
I'm glad you enjoyed it
User avatar #135 to #134 - holeymoley (09/29/2013) [-]
it was a really good article, i thoroughly enjoyed it.
User avatar #136 to #135 - Wumbologist (09/29/2013) [-]
Thank god someone read it. I mass-messaged and you were the first to respond.
User avatar #137 to #136 - holeymoley (09/29/2013) [-]
really? wow.
User avatar #131 - suiker (08/02/2013) [-]
Yo wumbo, if you're still interested in writing that collab comic with my girlfriend. She's both on FJ and on SoL now. Her username is Purplemind, so hit her up if you're interested ^^
User avatar #118 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
So, how have you been wumbo?
User avatar #119 to #118 - Wumbologist (07/23/2013) [-]
I've been pretty swell. Yourself?
User avatar #121 to #119 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
also, I met Holey irl in England and it was awesome
User avatar #120 to #119 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
I've been better. Lacking in money, a proper computer and any reaction pictures (broke my laptop )
But apart from that everything is going well. I'll be having my halfaversary with my girlfriend soon, which is exciting ^^ (I bought a Shingeki no Kyojin wallet and two Black Butler figurines :3) and I'm going to Crete on holiday with my dad in August, so that ought to be fun.
I've also produced some more music, including a vocal only song about penises and anuses (soundcloud.com/vvcjim/mongolian-penis)
How about you? Do you have a girlfriend? How's the music going? You still watch anime?
User avatar #122 to #120 - Wumbologist (07/23/2013) [-]
That's why I keep my entire reaction pic folder on my dropbox! And that does sound delightful, but it's not letting me access it. Something tells me you'd enjoy this...
No, I don't have a girlfriend, mainly because I went to an all boys school, so I hardly know any girls. I start college university in September, which I am MASSIVELY looking forward to mainly for the presence of girls. The music is going swell, just today I figured out how to play "Emiya" from Fate/Stay Night. I still watch some anime, albeit not as much, as I've shifted more to manga and other things.
Another reason I'm looking forward so much to September is because I'll hear the results of a creative writing contest I entered. I think I did really well, but I won't know until September 1st. You can read my story here if you're interested...
You need to login to view this link
The title is an ancient Chinese proverb. Read it and let me know what you think if so you wish!
User avatar #123 to #122 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
that song made my day :')
I'm not looking forward much to school again because I'll have lotsa school exams an bluuhhhh

that is a pretty cool story, what was the assignment, Nic?
User avatar #124 to #123 - Wumbologist (07/23/2013) [-]
Oh yeah, my name's on there.
I wrote it for fun; it wasn't for school. Then I heard about the contest, polished it up and submitted it.
User avatar #125 to #124 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
so you're also into creative writing huh? Pretty creative person you are. Like my girlfriend, she's amazing at drawing, writing, acting, and filming.
Maybe you and her should make a manga together
User avatar #126 to #125 - Wumbologist (07/23/2013) [-]
I actually made a graphic novel with my friend. I'm in reality a very visual person, so graphic novels make sense to me. Of course, I can't draw for **** so that would be kind of cool.
User avatar #127 to #126 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
heh, maybe I'll hook you two up for a webcomic or something, for starters
User avatar #128 to #127 - Wumbologist (07/23/2013) [-]
Could I see a drawing of hers, just out of curiosity?
User avatar #130 to #128 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
Also, she's interested in making a comic with you if you want
#129 to #128 - suiker (07/23/2013) [-]
Here's her deviantart: othersidenight.deviantart.com/
and this is a picture she made while very emotional, she made lots with this style, and I keep telling her to make more because I really like the style and it's completely hers.
#113 - holeymoley (07/13/2013) [-]
wumbologist wasn't bashing on brits was he?   
in all seriousness, i dont know why you got red thumbed
wumbologist wasn't bashing on brits was he?

in all seriousness, i dont know why you got red thumbed
User avatar #114 to #113 - Wumbologist (07/13/2013) [-]
Yeah, I was just trying to make the point that Americans have become FJ's punching bag, yet there are still cultural aspects of Europe that don't make sense. And it's because a lot of FJers are egotistical Eurofags. Not Europeans. Eurofags. There's a difference.
User avatar #115 to #114 - holeymoley (07/13/2013) [-]
i understand what you mean dude.

i dont like the whole "bash on america" thing either.
User avatar #116 to #115 - Wumbologist (07/13/2013) [-]
Thanks. I mean, I get that we're no longer the greatest country on Earth, but I'll be damned if we didn't used to be. I mean, during the Industrial Revolution and the age of "American Ingenuity," it was definitely a great nation. Or World War II too.
User avatar #117 to #116 - holeymoley (07/13/2013) [-]
the same here, like 100 years ago we ruled.
User avatar #111 - sonda **User deleted account** (04/18/2013) [-]
Hey, Wumbo. I realised that I never really talked to you while you were still part of SoL. what're you up to these days?
User avatar #112 to #111 - Wumbologist (04/20/2013) [-]
Well, I've been doing a lot--hanging out with friends, reading manga, recording, studying Chinese; just yesterday I came back from a mandatory retreat. Just waiting for senior year to be over so I can head off to college. Yourself?
#110 - ikachan has deleted their comment [-]
#108 - herecomesjohnny (02/21/2013) [-]
it's good, very good, the quick pacing makes it quite startling, go for it!
User avatar #109 to #108 - Wumbologist (02/21/2013) [-]
Thanks a lot!
User avatar #103 - onkii (02/07/2013) [-]
just wanted to say that i love you.

i don't know you.

but i love you.
#104 to #103 - Wumbologist (02/07/2013) [-]
No but seriously what's the context for this visit?
No but seriously what's the context for this visit?
User avatar #105 to #104 - onkii (02/07/2013) [-]
regarding your posts about feminism
User avatar #106 to #105 - Wumbologist (02/07/2013) [-]
Oh, ok. Thanks man, I appreciate it.
User avatar #107 to #106 - onkii (02/07/2013) [-]
i'm studying anthropology/history and i always appreciate when other people know how to use logic and reasoning regarding touchy subjects such as feminism, and having open minds towards it. other than comments like "back in the kitchen lelz" or "feminism is the devil!"
yeah, feminism has had many negative aspects on "normal society" (regarding traditional views of patriarchy) but it has opened up so many doors to bettering our society as a whole. our society, regarding women/gays/liberals is in that awkward teenage stage, where everything is confusing and it doesn't seem like there is going to be any improvement any time soon. but, it will get better in the future. history has already shown us that.

sorry this comment isn't put together very well, i just got home from a long day and i'm very tired. i hope you get the gist of what i'm saying.
#99 - holeymoley (01/01/2013) [-]
I have decided to purchase "lost at sea"

How are you finding O'Malley's work so far?
#100 to #99 - Wumbologist (01/01/2013) [-]
Well I read every single book the day I got it, so, after having completed it, I ADORED IT. I had seen Scott Pilgrim the movie before, but the books are just on another level—absolute masterwork. Furthermore, I had actually read all of them at a friend's house before, but I just wanted to reread them/actually own them for future reference, because the reread value is absurdly high.
Lost at Sea is also quite good, but in a different, more introspective way, and while you'll still see a lot of the O'Malley-style witty dialogue, it's a more somber work.
User avatar #101 to #100 - holeymoley (01/01/2013) [-]
i know how you feel, now you must...

good ol' clement will do

User avatar #102 to #101 - Wumbologist (01/02/2013) [-]
But the only consoles I own are a PS2 and a Wii, and my only computer is a piece of **** that can't even run in-browser minecraft, so watching those videos will just make me want to play a game I ultimately can't...
#96 - tweetyftw **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #97 to #96 - Wumbologist (12/20/2012) [-]
Damn, that's impressively in-depth.
Something tells me you don't approve too much of the Calvinist Party.
#98 to #97 - tweetyftw **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#86 - herecomesjohnny (12/09/2012) [-]
A Little Busters jazz cover?  YOU GLORIOUS CREATURE!
A Little Busters jazz cover? YOU GLORIOUS CREATURE!
#88 to #87 - herecomesjohnny (12/09/2012) [-]
and may i say café in september is quite cool, too (hope i'm not intruding listening to those two songs)
User avatar #89 to #88 - Wumbologist (12/09/2012) [-]
Thank you for listening! Don't worry about it; all my videos that I've made public are public for a reason.
#79 - herecomesjohnny (12/06/2012) [-]
Wumbo, i've made a decision.

I'm gonna try and write comedy (situational)

I've got a premise but damn i still feel lost, any tips? I know you've already kinda delved into that and honestly from the résumé of what you once told me, you seem like on another level. Any crucial stuff i should follow?
User avatar #80 to #79 - Wumbologist (12/07/2012) [-]
I'm just a high schooler with a fledging fanfiction career, but I'd say that the most important thing is to make it seem natural. While this necessitates a certain amount of social grace itself, it's important that as you write it, you ask yourself a) would anyone ever say this and b) would THIS CHARACTER ever say it.

So, certain types of people are frequently used in comedy, and there are some tried-and-true character archetypes. For example, you usually will have a...
Genki Girl (or guy, but usually girl)
Magnificent Bastard
Straight Man
Deadpan Snarker
and so forth.

Rather than writing situations, spend a good chunk of time writing characters, down to their hobbies, likes, dislikes, and backstories, and just sit back and let your intriguing characters live their lives, which, if you did it right, should be hilarious. So, when you create these sort of characters, you're not creating situations that will produce more jokes, the characters are. For example, let's say that your token foreigner has invited you for traditional Eastern European food, or that your Magnificent Bastard has for some reason and with no explanation signed your gang up for a curling tournament, with no explanation. These sort of situations would arise naturally from the absurd characters you create. So, now that you've been invited to token foreigner's house, what's the first thing the cloudcuckoolander notices or says--perhaps that it smells like wheat grass. But wait, inquires the straight man, what is that and how do you know what it smells like--cue the Magnificent Bastard, who comments that they most likely overdid the roast, and the musclehead could then produce a hilarious misunderstanding that greatly offends the foreigner's parents. This is a terrible example, but I'm trying to illustrate the point that the jokes should just WRITE THEMSELVES if you create interesting characters in an interesting setting.

I hope this helps, and let me know how it goes.
#81 to #80 - herecomesjohnny (12/07/2012) [-]
wow, thanks a whole lot for taking the time to write all that and look links up and all, i'll definitely try to follow your advice! If it works out, expect huge dedz to you man!
wow, thanks a whole lot for taking the time to write all that and look links up and all, i'll definitely try to follow your advice! If it works out, expect huge dedz to you man!
#83 to #81 - Wumbologist (12/07/2012) [-]
User avatar #75 - ikachan (11/24/2012) [-]
Wumbo, you know what we should have tonight? A good ol' session of WORDS THAT FOLLOW! :O
User avatar #77 to #75 - Wumbologist (11/24/2012) [-]
Yeah, let's do it tonight. I guess I went to bed early last night.
User avatar #78 to #77 - ikachan (11/24/2012) [-]
I'm with the anime club until late tonight, so I might miss it, but I have no problem with it tonight.....
User avatar #76 to #75 - ikachan (11/24/2012) [-]
Sunday works too if tonight is no good
User avatar #70 to #69 - Wumbologist (11/22/2012) [-]
Yeah, I guess I'm not a big "profile comment" guy.
User avatar #71 to #70 - zameckis (11/22/2012) [-]
#72 to #71 - Wumbologist (11/22/2012) [-]
...good question. How do we know each other?   
I mean, anime must be involved, right?
...good question. How do we know each other?
I mean, anime must be involved, right?
#73 to #72 - zameckis (11/22/2012) [-]
i'm not quite sure for myself as well,.,.,
maybe from old sol thread?
User avatar #74 to #73 - Wumbologist (11/22/2012) [-]
Well, I was more active on SOL II, and only ever made one comment on the first one. Ironically, it was one of the first comments, then I left and rejoined it.
What I think is more likely is that we discussed something on some anime-related content or something of that nature.
#65 - tweetyftw **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #66 to #65 - Wumbologist (11/21/2012) [-]
Besides extremely nitpicky stuff (I'm actually a super smart American, as it turns out), that checks out.
#67 to #66 - tweetyftw **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #68 to #67 - Wumbologist (11/22/2012) [-]
It's really not, it's just that the stupid majority is more vocal.
#63 - Gamedudebt **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #64 to #63 - Wumbologist (11/17/2012) [-]
No; I don't do items.
#60 - Zhuan (11/02/2012) [-]
So, Wumbo, I was thinking of doing a Macademi Wasshoi jokesub and was wondering if you have seen the actual series yet.
User avatar #61 to #60 - Wumbologist (11/02/2012) [-]
Sorry, but I can't say I have.
#62 to #61 - Zhuan (11/02/2012) [-]
Well I was going to cast you as Professor Sagami, the blonde in the bottom right. Since I picture you as kind of an unofficial keeper of the peace in SoL thread and he keeps track of Discipline in the Academy, he's also a Robot who's head pops off and is a humorous joke.
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