Isn't that really bad for you?

Extremely, my heart is still beating really hard and really fast.

I hope you're okay

and that it knocks you out just so you'll get some sleep

Not a chance.

Hell I pissed green earlier today from the Monsters.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO YOUR OWN BODYYY

According to my doctors a few weeks ago, nothing bad.

According to my therapist this morning, I'm slowly destroying it and tormenting myself.

Listen to your therapist!

Maybe

that....is really good 0.0

Yell it at him

..no thank you

Ohgosh thank you :3

was it you hehe ^^

Yep~

dang that's creepy

reminds me of that guy from Courage the cowardly dog

That show scared me

I'm not weird to think that way about the second one, right?
www.funnyjunk.com/user_pictures/thevoiceoftruth/4362686/Friendly/2146076#2146076

The second one being the shower thing?

It's not that weird

ok good.....he made it sound like it was totally unreasonable

It's not unreasonable, it's about your comfort levels

I am actually kinda not ok with him being here
just because I'm just kinda sitting here and feel like a loser
and I have to sit next to him in class tomorrow

You're so negative, why would he think you're a loser?

and don;t all me negative :c

because I'm just sitting at the computer

That doesn't make you a loser

yeah...but...he is all...hanging out with his friends and stuff

You're hanging out with friends

but...he doesn;t know that

same

Awwwww thank you. <3

Ninight Nii~Chan

sleep well, when you do

Hiya

How're you?

I'm good~
Watching TV with my brother in his bed and relaxing from school

Yourself?

Glad to hear it ^^
That sounds pretty good. Do you get along well with your brother?

Im great thanks! Just finished packing my bags for tomorrow and watching tele.

I get along well with this brother, yeah :3
Packing for what?

I see, thats good to hear. I only really get along with my brothers.
I've been visiting my dad in sweden, Im flying back home to England tomorrow.

Oh! What's the traveling around been like? Tell me about it

Its been so-so. Im used to going in between and I always feel nervous flying, and get jet lag. I havent really been anywhere else but them two countries, I'd like to go to Canada one day.

I don't like flying very much either

Why Canada?

It seems interesting, it has anime conventions and pretty good cities,

Neat :3

Kawaii absol

Used to be the girl part of a pair of absol with Proximity before that account got banned

AAAAAAWWWWW DAS SO KAWAII!!!! :d

hehe

thank you

I loved Toradora, but I kind of regret watching it.

Ever since I did, I can't get the phrase "Baka chi" out of my head..

I thank you for your concern and offer :3

Perhaps if I reach a point of insanity I'll need a good venting

I hope your evening is very well

I've been in a anti-social mood

And when I haven't been I've been busy

excuses, excuses, though

Why even reply if I'm going to immediately shower and then sleep afterwards?
Anyway, I hope your night is well

Alright, I hope you have a goodnight, I'll tell you what's on my mind later then.

Hiya

Something up?

Still not liking the whole 'being social' thing

No more anger though :3

Well that's good.

I'm sorry to hear about that, would you like me to go?

Yeah :3 Sorry about that
It's nothing against you

It's ok.

Here, have this. You may find use for it someday~

But I have one now already and it's the same one again we got back together

That doesn't mean you still won't find a use for it

Regrettably no, I'm sorry

I would ask what's wrong, but if you don't wanna talk, you don't wanna talk.

Feel better soon mate.

Thank you :3

I hope your day is going well

Killa's hurt Wyatt?
So what had Wyatt done to deserve this in Killa's eyes?

How do you think Killa will feel once he's done yelling at people and realizes what he's done?

He posted killa's picture on the thread when they hung out, and killa got pissed.
Then he gave it to the small skype group they're together in, and killa got even more pissed.

And he probably won't care anymore after he's done.

I remember seeing Killa's picture, I remember him getting a little angry too from it.
I wonder if that was it?

It wasn't right for him to give out the picture, but it's a slight justification for why he made it onto Killa's hitlist. Though to have a hitlist at all is just self-destructing.

If he's destroying all (but two) of his relationships, then in the end he'll have himself and the two of you and a lot of damage in his wake.

He'll have to apologize to everyone, regardless of whether he wants to repair the relationships.

Won't care anymore, as in he's completely self-destructing?

As in, and I quote to the best of my memory, "I've had it with everyone's bullshit. I'm tired of people just using me and then walking away. All I feel is anger now."

What happens when all the anger is gone?

Don't know.

What will you do, when he's not letting you close?

All I can do. He won't let me in to help, so I'll just sit back and watch, making sure things don't get out of hand and he doesn't get hurt.

Or worse..

Or worse?

Letting out years of anger can be very dangerous, especially depending on who you let it out on.

The last time I got angry, I let 5 years worth of anger out on someone. And what started out as yelling, turned in to fighting, which turned in to me laying down in the mud covered in bruises and blood.

Wasn't it at least a valuable experience to have, to let out that much anger?

Or did you feel like you wish you could have prevented it?

I wish I could've prevented it.

Point is, if he's not careful about what he says and to who. He could end up seriously injured, or even dead. But that's assuming he's flipping out on people irl as well.

Seems like you have no choice but to watch him carefully

and see if you can stop anything horrible from happening, if you can

That's all I can do, is try.

I wish you two the best of luck, and I hope no one gets seriously hurt

Thanks.

How do you think you'll do, going through all this?

Don't know.

What did you do?

www.funnyjunk.com/user/lonesomeshadow/3336#3336

That's dangerous.

Were you drunk or overly stressed?

I was in pain...

I was in more pain than I wanted to handle, I just wanted it all to go away. So I thought the physical pain would help me forget about the pain in my heart.

Did it help?

Would you do it again if you were in this much pain?

No.

I was stupid and let myself get weak. I'll make sure it'll never happen again.

You have to find better outlets for your pain!

That aren't self harm.

I know.

I feel terrible for it..

You shouldn't feel terrible

I understand what you did, I've done it myself.

It's not that it makes you a bad person, it just means that you need an outlet for the pain. And self-harm is probably one of the worst outlets

I know..

How do feel now?

Meh.

My cuts itch from the gauze. And I'm worried about killa.

Why are you worried?

Because he's finally letting 7 years of anger out. So he's venting/yelling at everyone. And he won't let me help.

He just wants me to stay away and not press him further on helping him.

Is he pushing you away because he doesn't want to let out his anger onto you?

That's what he told me.

He doesn't want to hurt me because I don't know what he could say to me.

Then, what you can do is maybe comfort any of those people having anger released on them and kind of calm them down so they can accept it and he can fully unleash all of his anger.

Then once he's done instead of seeing his wake of destruction he'll see you helping mend any bridges damaged or broken

He doesn't care about hurting anyone.

He doesn't care because he feels no one cares about him.

It's hard to convince someone to care about people when they think no one cares about them.

What all his he doing to let out his anger? Is he hurting his friends?

Why does he believe no one cares about him?

He just.. yelling at everyone. People he has grudges against, people he feels have wronged him, just anyone and everyone he can. And he is hurting people, I know for a fact Wyatt was one of these people and he's hurt from it.

And he believes no one cares about him because no one talks to him unless they want something. He feels used, taken advantage of. He's told me only ali and I are his real friends.

FIX'D

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

:D

What's up?

Too much social interaction ^^

I'll hide and watch a movie for a while

I hope your weekend is going well

It's going alright.
What movie?

Secretary, 2002

Just a little anti-social :3

So much attention and I have to get away at times

I understand that feeling

It's been building up a while
I may not be around much this weekend

oh.....ok

I just......might...need you

How so? :3

well....if I do it...and stuff

I will be here for that at all times!

oh, ok

Speck

My bad on the skype, having it open is like still being in a room of people

Why have FJ still online?

I went through the content for a while

Good thing then :3

So for now you have time to build up motivation to do it :3

I took a nap
but I'm back now

Ah, you know you're going to lose.

Link me to it

www.funnyjunk.com/user_pictures/thevoiceoftruth/4362686/Friendly/1866811#1866811

A war on not eating

dumbest war ever

If you starve yourself your body is just going to hold onto fat longer

tell that to Africa

People in Africa live their whole lives without food,

and also those children have bloated bellies from not eating

.....
fine I=/

You should eat small frequent and low calorie meals each day so that your body is processing foods quickly

ok...well....what should I have now?

Have some vegetables or fruits

Fruits and Veggies have so little calories in them that even if you spent all day eating them you wouldn't gain weight

I think you'll do well :3

I guess I could do it now
my mom just left for somewhere she couldn;t even cook dinner
but I'm not ready

You could do it now

and then you have school tomorrow and you could avoid her then~

she drives me to school :/

Text her once you get out of the car and then turn your phone off during school maybe?

Who takes you home?

the bus

Then it's perfect

text her once you get out and she leaves

then take the bus home and turn your phone off all day
and run to your room and hide

but then how do I talk to you?

Talk to me when you get home and turn your phone on :3

....ok
I probably won;t do it

Won't do it at all?

Or won't do it like that?

I don;t know
I don;t think I could work up the courage to at school

But you could just text her and then quickly turn your phone off and pretend like you didn't do it all day and focus on school

...I guess

Yeah :3

well you gave the impression that something was bugging you.

Just wanted to see if I could help

Thank you for your concern :3

Ninight

But awkwardness isn't enjoyable from people who are experiencing the awkward

sometimes people think it's cute

...huh?

I'm not sure

I can't brain

well....sometimes I just feel...meh
I mean...I defiantly don;t have a manly body
but I don;t have a girly one either

You probably meant to use "definitely".

Will you go on hormones? It would make your body girlier

I know
but I want it nooooow
i feel so awkward

You shouldn't feel awkward

you should be comfortable with yourself

I can't
I want long hair
and hips
and boobs
and a vagina

Just live in your head like you already have them

heh
I want boobs too

....fine
I still won;t be 100% comfortable though

But you'll be more comfortable every day :3

What if thinking and believing yourself to be a girl creates it's own slight hormone shift?

maybe
and you just reminded me it's almost friday
maybe we should talk about that

What's bad about Friday?

I....was gonna come out then

Oh :3 But that's okay

you still have time to play things

plan?
could you help me...I don;t know
I guess we already have a plan...but....

The plan is to text your mom first, and before she leaves to go somewhere, and to tell her that you want her to not tell anyone so that you can do it slowly.

Will you tell just her on friday, and then deal with that and be comfortable with it, and then tell it to another person?

yes...I plan on only telling her on friday
and...I don;t know probably not talking about it or coming out of my room for the rest of the day

That seems okay, to tell her and then works for a few days accepting it and being comfortable with it

and then trying and telling someone new

can we skype?

Well, the plan we have so far...

It's okay I saw them :3

oh....you did?
um....where they ok?

They were nice and normal legs :3

ok....good

.....your not just saying that are you?

Being 100% honest

your legs are quite normal

from all the things you say I expected them to be less nice, but they are nice :3
And not hairy

you think people could tell they were guy legs

They were all responding like you were a girl

...ok....I'm self conscious

There's no need to beeee

I can't help it

Think positively

I'll try...but...

But nothing!

but...

But what?

I don't know....sometimes I feel awkward

Awkward is okay, as long as your have some love for yourself :3