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HailtotheKing

Last status update:
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Personal Info
Gender: male
Age: 21
Date Signed Up:3/01/2010
Last Login:4/26/2015
Funnyjunk Career Stats
Comment Ranking:#13239
Highest Content Rank:#7390
Highest Comment Rank:#1142
Content Thumbs: 76 total,  92 ,  16
Comment Thumbs: 3730 total,  3878 ,  148
Content Level Progress: 80% (4/5)
Level 3 Content: New Here → Level 4 Content: New Here
Comment Level Progress: 94% (94/100)
Level 228 Comments: Mind Blower → Level 229 Comments: Mind Blower
Subscribers:12
Content Views:8869
Times Content Favorited:5 times
Total Comments Made:739
FJ Points:3109
Hail to the king, baby

latest user's comments

#42 - Awesome story about this guy and Michael Jackson. Al… 04/01/2015 on Dancing With The Stars 0
#121 - Funny story about (fake) an insane girlfriend! So th… 04/01/2015 on Ex girlfriends +1
#35 - He's using his left hand for the mouse. Pretty sneak… 03/29/2015 on Pornhub ad 0
#84 - Damn. You are on the ball. 03/27/2015 on maxpaynenarration's profile 0
#81 - Thanks man. I don't know your background, I don't know what ex…  [+] (1 new reply) 03/27/2015 on maxpaynenarration's profile 0
User avatar #83 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
I'm here if you ever need the help. Also, I'd like to just try and get some shorts published before I took on such a heavy endeavour like a novel.
#79 - Thanks man. I don't know if you've seen any of my posts around…  [+] (5 new replies) 03/27/2015 on maxpaynenarration's profile 0
User avatar #82 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
chuckpalahniuk.net/features/13-writing-tips Also, here's 13 writing tips by Chuck Palahniuk.
User avatar #84 - HailtotheKing (03/27/2015) [-]
Damn. You are on the ball.
User avatar #80 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
I've only been around for about a month now, and I tend to scour the uploads, find some relevant content and bang out some work, so I don't see many writers unless they message me.

Also, you may have put 12 hours into something, but writing is like a car. You don't throw the whole thing away because one of the wheels is fucked! You will get to a point where your work, physically, can be tweaked. Spelling errors and such are cosmetic and can be fixed, but you have to want to get your work out there.

Also, some advice: EVERYBODY'S FIRST DRAFT IS TERRIBLE. EVERYBODY'S. Nobody out there never published a first draft--NOBODY. It's mental. If you worked twelve hours on something and it sucked, then you EDIT it and FIX it.

Somebody might read it and go "Well, I'm not into this kind of stuff," but regardless, everybody knows good character and good story and people will tell you what works and what doesn't. Your work is just that: WORK. It can be fixed. So don't ever doubt that what you write is going to be ripped to shreds, because even if it is, you will learn from the mistakes and improve. And the next 12 hours you work will be greater because when you come back, you'll have made less mistakes that can be fixed easily as the other ones.

I've read Haunted by Chuck Paluhniuk, and a few others by Cormac. They are very good writers. Try some people like Kurt Vonnegut, Terry Pratchett, Ian Rankin. They all write strange, experimental stuff that is wonderful and strange to read.

Humility wise, I'll never agree that I'm as good as people say I am. I'm a writer, just that, and writers are always learning, trying, and adapting, and I've never looked at myself and gone "I'm the best writer I know." You have the ability to be better than me. In the end, does it matter who is better? The fact there's two people here who can write some kickass stories that evoke responses is a good enough achievement for me. I'll agree I'm good when I finally hit a bestseller list or something, haha.

User avatar #81 - HailtotheKing (03/27/2015) [-]
Thanks man. I don't know your background, I don't know what experiance you have, I don't know if I'll ever be as good as you are but I'll try. And if you did put a book out I'd be the first one to buy it.
User avatar #83 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
I'm here if you ever need the help. Also, I'd like to just try and get some shorts published before I took on such a heavy endeavour like a novel.
#77 - Hey man, I'm just genuinely wondering if you could answer some…  [+] (7 new replies) 03/27/2015 on maxpaynenarration's profile 0
User avatar #78 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
Reading is one of the most important things you can do. Read stuff you like, and occasionally read stuff you don't like! I became adept at writing because I just did it a lot. If you write every day, then you just get better. It's a fact. Writing is very much like a muscle and if you practice it every day, you're going to get somewhere.

Get into a community! Writing forums, small groups, facebook groups. Write stories and understand that criticism is KEY. People are going to tear your work and your characters apart, but you have to understand it's all just a process, and you're getting better with every mistake because you learn. Other people will push you in the direction on how to get better.

Also, just read a couple of books to understand things easier. Story by Robert McKee is amazing. Writing Fiction for Dummies is good too.

Simply put, I got good by writing a lot, getting shot down, getting help from others, and by studying the craft. I am by no means, a good writer, but I feel like I'm going in the right direction with it all.

It helps to have somebody to bounce ideas off of. To talk to about what you want to write etc, etc. If you ever need help, just PM me, and I'll answer any questions you have.

Keep writing, writer.
User avatar #79 - HailtotheKing (03/27/2015) [-]
Thanks man. I don't know if you've seen any of my posts around or even heard of me (probably not) but I like to call myself a writer. Even though I'm really not. Honestly, I kind of fear it. I fear what people will have to say if I show them my writing. I fear that I'll put twelve hours into something and another person shoots it down immediately. Weirdly enough I also fear that people will like it since I don't think I deserve any praise.

I'm reading a lot but I don't know if I'm picking anything up from it. I'm drawn to books that have a, let's say, unconventional style of writing. Chuck Palahniuk and Cormack McCarthy are two of my favorite writers and their writing is far from what can be considered normal.

Also, not a good writer? Knock that shit off. Humility is good but understand this: You are the best writer I have seen on this site.
User avatar #82 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
chuckpalahniuk.net/features/13-writing-tips Also, here's 13 writing tips by Chuck Palahniuk.
User avatar #84 - HailtotheKing (03/27/2015) [-]
Damn. You are on the ball.
User avatar #80 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
I've only been around for about a month now, and I tend to scour the uploads, find some relevant content and bang out some work, so I don't see many writers unless they message me.

Also, you may have put 12 hours into something, but writing is like a car. You don't throw the whole thing away because one of the wheels is fucked! You will get to a point where your work, physically, can be tweaked. Spelling errors and such are cosmetic and can be fixed, but you have to want to get your work out there.

Also, some advice: EVERYBODY'S FIRST DRAFT IS TERRIBLE. EVERYBODY'S. Nobody out there never published a first draft--NOBODY. It's mental. If you worked twelve hours on something and it sucked, then you EDIT it and FIX it.

Somebody might read it and go "Well, I'm not into this kind of stuff," but regardless, everybody knows good character and good story and people will tell you what works and what doesn't. Your work is just that: WORK. It can be fixed. So don't ever doubt that what you write is going to be ripped to shreds, because even if it is, you will learn from the mistakes and improve. And the next 12 hours you work will be greater because when you come back, you'll have made less mistakes that can be fixed easily as the other ones.

I've read Haunted by Chuck Paluhniuk, and a few others by Cormac. They are very good writers. Try some people like Kurt Vonnegut, Terry Pratchett, Ian Rankin. They all write strange, experimental stuff that is wonderful and strange to read.

Humility wise, I'll never agree that I'm as good as people say I am. I'm a writer, just that, and writers are always learning, trying, and adapting, and I've never looked at myself and gone "I'm the best writer I know." You have the ability to be better than me. In the end, does it matter who is better? The fact there's two people here who can write some kickass stories that evoke responses is a good enough achievement for me. I'll agree I'm good when I finally hit a bestseller list or something, haha.

User avatar #81 - HailtotheKing (03/27/2015) [-]
Thanks man. I don't know your background, I don't know what experiance you have, I don't know if I'll ever be as good as you are but I'll try. And if you did put a book out I'd be the first one to buy it.
User avatar #83 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
I'm here if you ever need the help. Also, I'd like to just try and get some shorts published before I took on such a heavy endeavour like a novel.
#186 - GOD DAMN IT THIS IS GOOD. 03/27/2015 on Lucky Once +1
#161 - ...God damn I wish I was as good at writing as you are.  [+] (2 new replies) 03/27/2015 on Lucky Once +1
#176 - maxpaynenarration (03/27/2015) [-]
"I wish I was as good at this as you were," said HailtotheKing, his voice soft, filled with admiration. Looking back on myself, as if looking through all the faded, cracked remnants of a mirror, I realized my world was an intermittent fragment of narration, of coming close and then failing, slipping from what I once was, but at least I could turn a phrase.

You can. You just gotta believe.
User avatar #186 - HailtotheKing (03/27/2015) [-]
GOD DAMN IT THIS IS GOOD.
#50 - From what I've seen she is a very nice person, really funny, a… 03/26/2015 on Oy Vey Goyum +1
#113 - I legitimately believed for a moment that that was Danny Sexbang. 03/25/2015 on Alpha inmate 0
#31 - Well, if it were not for thatguyinabox I would not have know a… 03/25/2015 on Boozle: Chapter 4 +1
#46 - You raise a good point. I'm going to use this from now on. 03/11/2015 on Dont be average 0
#35 - I've always heard this as "one testicle, one ovarian tube…  [+] (2 new replies) 03/11/2015 on Dont be average 0
#39 - fefe (03/11/2015) [-]
why not 1 testicle and 1 ovary? why go to the unnecessary step of specifying the tube?
User avatar #46 - HailtotheKing (03/11/2015) [-]
You raise a good point. I'm going to use this from now on.
#128 - Congratulations! I truly wish you and your family the best fut… 03/08/2015 on Thought id share +1
#12 - Oh god, that picture just reminded me that Lenard Nemoy died y…  [+] (1 new reply) 02/28/2015 on Her positivity was amazing. +15
#18 - zorach (02/28/2015) [-]
Take this.
#175876 - I feel like **** and I need advice. I'm twent…  [+] (4 new replies) 02/25/2015 on Advice - love advice,... 0
User avatar #175895 - casval (02/25/2015) [-]
Check with your school's financial aid office about work study opportunities. They're usually very easy jobs that work around your class schedule and you might could even find one for the psychology department. I also agree with itszyzzbrah, try lifting weights. That does wonders for my self-confidence.

Don't feel like shit because you have to live with your parents. Its more common than you might think in our generation. It's not you, it's the economy we grew up in. When our parents were going to school, college was cheap and minimum wage jobs still payed enough to buy groceries and pay the bills. These days, you and I don't have it so easy.

Just don't forget that your parents helped you as a young adult and remember to treat them well for it later, when you're independent.
#175889 - fefe (02/25/2015) [-]
You're doing a lot more than I am at least. I've been a NEET for almost three years now with no contacts outside family and even then it's limited to a point where it might as well be considered isolation. The worst part is that I know that I should be doing shit, but I just can't seem to care anymore.
#175887 - itszyzzbrah (02/25/2015) [-]
Try lifting, brah. It not only helps you physically, but sometimes it can also help you mentally to make you feel like your worth shit. A sickkunt, m8. SICK FUCKIN' KUNT. mirin'?? You will be once you look in the mirror after a weeks of hard work.

It's my 5 week deal im offerin to ya, brah. Lift like hell, and you'll be shredded enough to apply at a model job, modeling shirts. No need to have any skills, just a shredded body.

No need to be a sad cunt, m8. Life's bitter but it's all you got. At least you got a gf that you care about and vice versa. If it makes you feel any better, I dont have a job either. But I am happy because I lift a lot and see progress. GOOD LUCK.
User avatar #175879 - spaceking (02/25/2015) [-]
You could get a job as a dishwasher, I would be very surprised if they brought you in for a formal interview, and have a high turnover rate, so they pop up pretty often.
I hope everything works out for you.
#43 - ...I'm an idiot. 02/23/2015 on Bender Bending Rodriguez +4
#23 - Let me try to explain, even though I'm about as confused as yo…  [+] (6 new replies) 02/23/2015 on Bender Bending Rodriguez +2
#48 - deathknifeone (02/23/2015) [-]
11/11 never forget
#26 - apurpleliger (02/23/2015) [-]
Sounds about right. It was September 11th, though.
User avatar #43 - HailtotheKing (02/23/2015) [-]
...I'm an idiot.
User avatar #31 - BwainPhreeze (02/23/2015) [-]
November the 9th
User avatar #51 - capslockrage (02/23/2015) [-]
Fool.
#41 - apurpleliger (02/23/2015) [-]
It happened in America, where the month comes before the day.
www.911memorial.org/about-memorial
#36 - I disagree, but I see where you are coming from. The… 02/23/2015 on Seriously +3
#12 - I have a friend who is in a long term relationship with her Da… 02/21/2015 on Social Media Comp 20 0
#102 - Oh my god. I actually know that first kid. I ever thought this… 02/21/2015 on Cringe adventures #6 +7
#1341 - Please draw me! Go easy on me. 02/14/2015 on Mods will draw or be your... 0
#39 - C-can I get one? 02/13/2015 on 50s be like +1
#531 - Well, I guess I started coming here about six years ago, right… 02/12/2015 on How did you find FJ and get... 0

items

Total unique items point value: 2050 / Total items point value: 2100

Comments(67):

[ 67 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #73 - gugek (11/18/2014) [-]
Good afternoon, have a great rest of your day friend!
#70 - iliketomop (09/30/2014) [-]
Thanks for the add, so lonely on here :'(
User avatar #71 to #70 - HailtotheKing (09/30/2014) [-]
My pleasure, my treasure.
User avatar #72 to #71 - iliketomop (09/30/2014) [-]
and you rhyme this will be fun
User avatar #65 - insertsfunnyname (07/11/2014) [-]
Hey, thanks for the friend request ^_^
User avatar #66 to #65 - HailtotheKing (07/11/2014) [-]
My pleasure! ^^ So, new friend, what should I know about you?
User avatar #67 to #66 - insertsfunnyname (07/11/2014) [-]
I don't know really, I'm not that interesting in all honesty :v

Well, my name is Sam and I'm for Hampshire, England, you? ^^
User avatar #68 to #67 - HailtotheKing (07/12/2014) [-]
Everyone is interesting in their own way. At least I think so

Sam. Is that short for Samuel or Samantha?
User avatar #69 to #68 - insertsfunnyname (07/12/2014) [-]
That's debatable xD

It's short for Samuel - not that I've ever been called that O_o
#64 - miraikuriyama (03/23/2014) [-]
#twerktem2014
#twerktem2014
User avatar #62 - lilhanna (03/09/2014) [-]
Thank you for that great story and being so nice with dealing with the forums.
User avatar #63 to #62 - HailtotheKing (03/09/2014) [-]
What can I say, I love telling stories and I've dealt with bigger asshole on the internet
#59 - vetis (03/03/2014) [-]
BIG SCARY PANDA! RAWR!
#61 to #60 - vetis (03/03/2014) [-]
Wow, that's an ugly panda. Looks like it's in the awkward teenage stage. Lol.
User avatar #57 - HorriblyCrazy (01/02/2014) [-]
i want the d

anny
User avatar #58 to #57 - HailtotheKing (01/02/2014) [-]
I want the v

agina
#50 - electraheart (06/18/2013) [-]
look at this precious baby  uwu
look at this precious baby uwu
User avatar #51 to #50 - HailtotheKing (06/18/2013) [-]
Hair curls .3.
#52 to #51 - electraheart (06/18/2013) [-]
yeehh and thats not all .3.
yeehh and thats not all .3.
User avatar #53 to #52 - HailtotheKing (06/18/2013) [-]
.3. how many of these do you have?
#54 to #53 - electraheart (06/18/2013) [-]
.3. i may or may not have made a mascot folder of her
.3. i may or may not have made a mascot folder of her
User avatar #55 to #54 - HailtotheKing (06/18/2013) [-]
I fully expected you to say that .3.
#56 to #55 - electraheart (06/18/2013) [-]
you know me so well :3
you know me so well :3
#49 - electraheart has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #47 - Furry (01/09/2013) [-]
hi ^^
User avatar #48 to #47 - HailtotheKing (01/09/2013) [-]
Hello :3
User avatar #43 - infernalinsolence (12/28/2012) [-]
“John,” said Sherlock in a lower voice. “I give you my word. I won't touch it again.”
User avatar #41 - freakaleak (09/13/2012) [-]
ouch!
User avatar #42 to #41 - HailtotheKing (09/13/2012) [-]
Sorry! .n. I was just clearing out some of the people I hardly talk to, feel free to re-add me if you want to :)
#32 - marshmallowsammich (01/19/2012) [-]
Hello there :3
Hello there :3
User avatar #33 to #32 - HailtotheKing (01/19/2012) [-]
You know what you should do?
User avatar #35 to #34 - HailtotheKing (01/19/2012) [-]
nuh uh! D:
#36 to #35 - marshmallowsammich (01/19/2012) [-]
Then wat do I do?
Then wat do I do?
#31 - LoLgenerator (09/16/2011) [-]
**LoLgenerator rolled a random image**  
  
  
╔══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╗  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Repost this if ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~   
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ you are a beautiful strong jewish jew ~ ~ ~  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ who did nine eleven ~ ~ ~ ~ ~   
╚══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╝
**LoLgenerator rolled a random image**


╔══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╗
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Repost this if ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ you are a beautiful strong jewish jew ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ who did nine eleven ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
╚══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╝
User avatar #25 - HorriblyCrazy (08/09/2011) [-]
It wouldn't let me respond D:

I'm Destiny.
Yeah, lets go with that :)
User avatar #26 to #25 - HailtotheKing (08/09/2011) [-]
:DD what a beautiful name!
User avatar #27 to #26 - HorriblyCrazy (08/09/2011) [-]
You're just a charmer, aren't you? :3
User avatar #28 to #27 - HailtotheKing (08/09/2011) [-]
nah, its just my nature
User avatar #29 to #28 - HailtotheKing (08/09/2011) [-]
good night destiny, sweet dreams
User avatar #30 to #29 - HorriblyCrazy (08/09/2011) [-]
Goodnight :) Danny
#18 - purrlikeawalrus **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #19 to #18 - HailtotheKing (08/01/2011) [-]
DD: i see.
#23 to #19 - purrlikeawalrus **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #24 to #23 - HailtotheKing (08/03/2011) [-]
-tackle hugs-
#21 to #19 - purrlikeawalrus **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #22 to #21 - HailtotheKing (08/02/2011) [-]
. n . fb?
#20 to #19 - purrlikeawalrus **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#17 - ironpns **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#8 - JustMeagan (02/22/2011) [-]
Why do you want to be my friend? No offense intended.
Why do you want to be my friend? No offense intended.
User avatar #9 to #8 - HailtotheKing (02/22/2011) [-]
no reason, im bored and wanted to make a new friend :P
User avatar #10 to #9 - JustMeagan (02/22/2011) [-]
That kind of sounds rapisty.
User avatar #11 to #10 - HailtotheKing (02/22/2011) [-]
care for some free popcorn and chocolate?
#12 to #11 - JustMeagan (02/22/2011) [-]
Really?! Where?!
User avatar #13 to #12 - HailtotheKing (02/22/2011) [-]
right in my van.
User avatar #15 to #14 - HailtotheKing (02/22/2011) [-]
well fine! i guess ill just give you the free amazingness!
-gives pop corn and chocolate-
User avatar #5 - grimendirt (01/23/2011) [-]
who is this
User avatar #6 to #5 - HailtotheKing (01/23/2011) [-]
no one, someone called you taylor once in a comment so i called you taylor on your page.
User avatar #7 to #6 - grimendirt (01/23/2011) [-]
oh that was the op muh friend.
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