The ceiling...
How does you?

Purty good
How was your day? :3

Really be 21, like my profile says...

Also, "I don't about your ability to hurt her..." <-- TAHW?

Yeah, my phone sucks like that, lol

I don't doubt your ability to hurt her.
And my suggestion was that you might be able to work as a butcher to try and keep your anger at bay?

Well, that would work, apart from the fact that I sometimes require the sound of a beautiful bloodcurdling scream to go along with it.
Basically, the monster within me, is less concerned with chopping up mean, and more concerned with tearing someone apart, limb by limb, it's even more fun if they put up a fight.

Like this --> [url deleted]

Fagmin, you're a fucking nigger-bitch...
http://www. YT . com/watch?v=Tf0zHxT6krs

Didn't you already link that song?

No, not in this conversation, at least.

Well I copy pasted and got the same song o3o

http://www.youtubeDOTMOTHERFUCKINGcom/watch?v=Tf0zHxT6krs&list=UUg_IIYm6GV9RNNBH sIltKiw&index=4&feature=plcp
This video, yes?

Video fucked up :3

Wat? :3

If you know much about Doctor Who, then you know that John Barrowman, who plays Jack Harkness is openly gay. Thus you'll also know that John is a prankster on sets.
Consider what uncle dolan is doing to my youtube links on my own profile page... and you get a gay uncle dolan being a troll.

Yeeeeaaah-no.
I've never seen Doctor Who and never will because I'm too lazy to watch it online. Same goes for anime and manga. I'm way too lazy to look it up on my own time.

I watch it on TV...
BBC America, FTW.
The only anime/manga I watch/read is Bleach.

Damn you and your TV!
I don't have those channels T3T

YOU SHOULD WATCH DOCTOR WHO, it mends ailing cry-babyness, overly excessive dramatical actions, and can even cure anger management issues, all while providing family fun television, and still being clever and intelligent...

I'll try :3

Url deleted :l

Painful, miserable, agonizing, tedious, sad, boring...
...
...
Why?

Up to something senses, tingling...

Is it so wrong to ask how your day went? I just wanted to know.
Besides, it can't have been that bad.

Seeing as I spend my life working to make people take the farthest path from me as they possibly can, just so that they can be as far away from me as possible... Yes.

And no, it's worse, an eternity of miserable, agonizing, loneliness, filled with the pain and sorrows of the past, unrelenting, always growing, never waning.

Why? Why try to make people run from you? And why are you so miserable? Sure a person can't always explain an emotion or reason behind that emotion, but you must have your own theories...

Because I don't like being around people, they don't help keep my madness in check, and I don't want them to see what true madness is like, as it would be the last thing they see.
As for my misery, I can explain it easily, at least for myself.
[url deleted]
It's quite simple, you see...
It was my choice.
I chose to give up all that made me happy, and kind. In return, I wanted the one I loved to never be sad, ever again. I would cut out my heart, and put it in her hands, if that's what it would take.

Who did you do this for?
And what exactly is your malfunction if you consider yourself mad?

Does it matter WHOM it is, as long as I loved them?
She was my Aerith, if that makes sense to you.
As nearly as I can tell, my very existence... I have been insane for as long as I can remember, so, to the extent of my knowledge, I've been crazy since I was born.
[url deleted]
http://www.youtube. com/watch?v=XzOhu24WNbE
Pissing me off, this highly selective URL deletion shit is.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to anger you. But how would destroying your capacity for emotion make her feel better? Why would your sacrifice of happiness appease her? If anything, you should maintain your emotional health and be there for her as best you can

Just because you can't see something, doesn't mean it isn't there.
[url deleted]
I may not be there when she wants me there, but I will always be there when she needs me the most, anything less, and I risk making her sad, making her cry. When we separated, I may have made her hate me, but it made her disconnect from me, she doesn't know I did all of it out of love, for her happiness.
Because she forgot, I told her many times, I would say to her, "No matter what I may say or do in the future, I will ALWAYS love you, nothing will stop that."

Sorry for the late reply.
But how do you risk making her sad? Isn't that true for anyone once someone develops a connection? Why don't you try to happily be with her and just try to make it work?

Wouldn't it make you sad to find out that the one you loved, suddenly hated you, then you find out years later that they acted like they hated you, because they love you, and wanted you to be happy? That they would endure that kind of despair, just to see you smile?
After so many years, I rather doubt that we could make a relationship work, at this point, I am fully engulfed in raging anger and misery, and I am sure that if I were to see her again, I would snap, and destroy everything I could possibly reach.

I agree, that would be painful.
But why do that? Why hate to make someone smile? Why try to lash out at a person to show your love them? And why, after knowing that they have loved you and wanted you to be happy, would you still hate?

But that's the trick, you see, she still thinks I hate her. I never told her that I ACTED like I hate her, she just thinks that I do. It allows her to justify not loving me anymore, without needing to dwell on the pain.

I understand that. That probably is the only way to keep someone who loves you away. But why? You're both sacrificing happiness for the other and just wallowing in the pain. Unnecessary pain might I add. You believe that she's better off without you, but think.

Is she really better off? Will she really love someone else to the point where she's deluded into thinking that causing you pain will be the only way for you I be happy? I believe that you are a nice person, and were even nicer back when this happened. I believe that you, just as anyone would else, wouldn't like to hurt people were it not for a greater cause. This is probably the first person to make you feel that way isn't it? Don't you think that instead of trying to create a future for someone else would be so much better if they fully enjoyed it?
More so, if you also got as much out of it as they did.

As I stated, the fact that she can take solace in the fact that she believes I hate her, allows her to quickly move on from the pain and sorrow.

Yes she's better off. As I have said in one of my previous posts, I have been insane for as long as I can remember, even before I met her, sometimes, too much of that insanity would break loose, and it would cause her pain, and sadness. For her to see someone so kind, and happy with her, suddenly become so angry and monstrous, it scared her, and it makes her sad, that this person she thought was so perfect, is also so very broken.

[url deleted]
http://www.youtube. com/watch?v=67O2tRPYZCI

There's only one small problem with all of that. If I cannot control my far more violent self, what do I do when that side of me crushes her skull in a violent rage?
I'm already strong enough to throw around 200 pounds of weight, at my reduced strength level, what happens when you're really pissed off, on an adrenaline rush, and can't stop yourself, with that kind of strength? TBH, I'd rather not risk finding out. (It may seem like I am making it up, purely for the sake of impressing someone, but I am really not. You can choose to believe me, and continue, or not believe me, and continue, I don't really care what you decide.)

I don't about your ability to hurt her, I just wish I could I help you.

Pardon my asking, but how old are you? (Really just asking because your age plays a big role in a possible solution)