after reading this i dont know what to do. this was supposed to be a pre-fap browse. foreveralone anon here. so socially awkward that im painfully accepting i will be alone the rest of my life, despite wanting to be loved, and love in return.

reading this just churns the poison in my veins. i know ill never be able to believe someone can really love me now, not truly. ill allways know they are just lying out of pity. and i cant stand pity, not for me, never for me. theres noone in my life im truly honest with. this is the only time i've even typed out this.

i cant even hop on the katawa shoujou train because i know the feels will turn to hooks in my brain and ill just end up hating even more. drinking dosent solve it. nothing solves it.

i hope your scarring fades derak. i really do. fuck that. i dont really. i think i want to want it. i cant tell whats me any more and whats the mask i put on to show people. i dont know if im really even like this or i just want to be so i have an excuse for how i am.

i know you guys dont care. i know its tldr. and i know im only an anon but, does it ever get any better? dont lie to me now, i dont need your honey-flavored bullshit. DOES IT GET ANY BETTER? sometimes i think that one day this feeling isnt going to fade, and i dont know if ill be able to do anything but just sit there and wait to die.