(untitled). . IN FRIENDS RPS 2 HRH [[ I ' l WIRE dmit TO GET HER IIT THE Dill} POTS it '. ll HER BUTT TIMI] SHE . FRIEND ' lmto THUR Mol' DOESN' T [IRE IT MOON  (untitled) IN FRIENDS RPS 2 HRH [[ I ' l WIRE dmit TO GET HER IIT THE Dill} POTS it ll BUTT TIMI] SHE FRIEND lmto THUR Mol' DOESN' T [IRE IT MOON
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[ 99 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
#2 - anon id: ecae055f
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Not many women care for butt play. To prove my point to the GF that it was ok, I put her entire dildo in my ass. She felt ok with it and about first joint on my finger in her butt she screams saying it hurts. Women are weak.
#34 to #2 - anon id: 011f0ab3
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
you don't just go around shoving **** up there, it's a ******* art. Women don't have a g-spot in their asshole so you've got to be ******* gentle and loosen her up until she starts enjoying it.
User avatar #42 to #2 - chokolocco
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
COOL STORY BRO
#59 to #2 - anon id: 80db3303
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Come on sign in like a man phanact...
#65 to #2 - anon id: 9b0d427b
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
The biggest issue is that the female tends to Tense up and clench and push back. without realizing it. And that can make it REALLY hurt. no matter how much lube you use. Because You are then fighting with her butt to get in.

Your chick wasn't weak. She just wasnt relaxed.
User avatar #90 to #2 - lotengo
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
plz tell me you said no homo before you got started
User avatar #7 to #2 - thewebspinner
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
I like the way you move think
User avatar #78 to #7 - dustypengwin
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Well, I know what song I'm listening to on loop for the next 6 hours.
#67 to #2 - plumpbooty
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
User avatar #9 to #2 - CallMeCrisco
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Eh, I don't like buttplay anymore because of my hemorrhoids but physically speaking, there's not a lot of reasons for a woman to like it. Unlike men, we're not blessed with ass g-spots. So it's a matter of liking the "full" feeling or liking it because it's taboo. Other than that, most women have no drive to shove things back there.
User avatar #17 to #9 - jarna
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Actually most of the women I've been with said they enjoy it due to the intensity of it.
So it might not have a direct advantage like it does for men, but it give more a mental and emotional reaction (which tends to be more of what women enjoy and need to get off).
#12 to #2 - pointblankhits
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Bro...
Bro...
User avatar #10 to #2 - PVTDickStryker
Reply +26 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Thats because most people that want to try butt-diving don't know **** and think everything's A-ok if you just hack a loogie on her starfish and pound away.
#11 to #2 - Jabberwocky
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Moar lube.
Moar lube.
#13 to #2 - alimaisbanned
Reply +43 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
My girlfriend gets really wild when my finger goes into her pooper during making out but if my dick goes during the cowboy-ing out of the vag into her pooper by accident then I'm in for a rodeo.  that implies she is not fond of it
My girlfriend gets really wild when my finger goes into her pooper during making out but if my dick goes during the cowboy-ing out of the vag into her pooper by accident then I'm in for a rodeo. that implies she is not fond of it
#66 to #13 - anon id: 9b0d427b
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Odd. Im the exact opposite. Fingers in the butt weird me out and Kills the mood for me... not to mention they arent as smooth.

I have this awful paranoia that he's gonna smell his hands after he does it...
#94 to #66 - anon id: ee343217
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I love the scent of freshly fingered vagina
#68 to #66 - anon id: 040308d3
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I do , And I ******* love it
User avatar #86 to #13 - Lilstow
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
start doing it with 2 fingers.

if you loosen it up she may become more willing.
#6 to #2 - canadafag
Reply +187 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
User avatar #3 - fitemeirlbro
Reply +28 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
was the 2 year old a dog because i think that most human hospitals have progressed past using anal play as a form of temperature measurement
#4 to #3 - anon id: 9c8619ef
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Or maybe it's an old ass joke...
User avatar #5 to #4 - fitemeirlbro
Reply +119 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
no its a young ass joke
User avatar #63 to #5 - deathstare
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
did you know you were making that pun? Or are you awesome by nature
#91 to #63 - anon id: c45c06cb
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Possibly one of the most forced puns i've heard in a while.
Also samefag.
User avatar #69 to #3 - talldumbdork
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
ER's I worked at in California had rolling temperature stands, both red and blue. Blue colored meant for oral use only, and red meant stop, for rectal use only. Rectal is still a much more reliable temperature in a emergency situation, and I've seen it used in elderly and patients who are in coma or unconscious. And yes.....I have stopped people just before they used a red stand on a oral temperature.
User avatar #8 to #3 - CallMeCrisco
Reply +20 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
To this day, rectal thermometers are our most accurate. Children in particular are harder to get an accurate reading on, so a lot of docs prefer to use the rectal method.

#15 to #8 - isonig
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
I would if I was a doc.
User avatar #25 to #15 - messerauditore
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
And that's how you lost your medical licence...
User avatar #46 to #8 - tittylovin
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
>put it in arm pit
>add a degree
congratulations, now you don't have to **** yourself every time you wanna know your temperature
User avatar #58 to #46 - arstya
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Sure, take the fun out of it...
User avatar #89 to #8 - gunni
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Liver thermometers are
But only for dead people
#18 - skelejockey
Reply +106 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Uh what kind of hospital let's the entire family, the sisters boyfriend, and a random other friend watch a four year old get stuck up the ass
User avatar #35 to #18 - scoobi
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Friend was probably in the waiting room while parents watched to find out. Friend told story teller later?
#71 to #18 - anon id: 422239e0
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
every hospital.... They can't do anything to a minor without a parent present or with parental consent. A doctor will not ask anyone to leave the room who came with the family. The family makes the decision who is allowed within the room not the doctor. The doctor can suggest only family be present but can not press it with legal means. The only time the above is not true is in surgery and life threatening situations and if the patient needs rest. Don't be an idiot.
#36 to #18 - swampwaterjack
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
one i wish i was in
#19 to #18 - zyketor
Reply +28 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
1 - You're right, it's ****** up. This post is total ******* ********, I'm betting.

2 - How did you get 2 and 4 mixed up? Nowhere in the OP does it say the number 4.
#20 to #19 - skelejockey
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Oh wow I don't even know lol
User avatar #1 - voltkills
Reply +36 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
if thats true that person watched a doctor stick a thermometer up the butt of a 2 year old. if that kid isnt you child thats kinda ****** up.
#14 to #1 - anon id: 2818d616
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
And you think that any man in a playground is a pedophile too, cool.
You're a misandrist.
User avatar #95 to #14 - voltkills
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
im not saying hes a pedo, im saying thats ******* weird.
#33 to #14 - anon id: 011f0ab3
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I don't think he meant just for men though, if I brought my gf to my house and she offered to give my young son a bath I wouldn't let her, just because I wouldn't want someone who isn't related to my kid seeing his privates.
#16 to #1 - isonig
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(08/07/2014) [-]
Not if he said "no pedo".
#60 - idelki
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
> sexing normally
> everything 100% hunkeedory
> dick slips out
> NO NEED FOR MANUAL REPOSITION MA'AM, FOR I AM THE ALPHA MALE, I SHALE THRUST MY GREAT LANCE OF GLORY BACK INTO THINE CORNERSTONE OF PLEASURE
> slip
> accidental anal
> her face morphs into that of pure inescapable terror
> ihavemadeahugemistake.jpg
> abortabortabort
> she's crying
> i'm crying
> cat starts crying
> mfw never again
#64 to #60 - marcury
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
at least **** didn't explode everywhere... :o that one was gross
at least **** didn't explode everywhere... :o that one was gross
#37 - spidurman
Reply +24 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#55 - grimmwaters
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Someone didn't use enough lube.
User avatar #24 - mrturferpop
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Wait, I just read it a third time, so the guys friend is ******* guy's GF?
User avatar #98 to #24 - repostforlife
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(11/17/2014) [-]
I thought we were over this. plus, being piss tired from double shifts has helped me sleep
User avatar #99 to #98 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(11/17/2014) [-]
It's okay, I slept all day today.
User avatar #26 to #24 - jacksipian
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
"my friend's gf" "my friend says 'your mom doesn't like it much either"

nowhere does it say it's the guys girlfriend. it only ever says it's his friend's girlfriend
User avatar #27 to #26 - mrturferpop
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Oh okay, I misread the first part.
I misread it 3 times.
3 Whole times.
User avatar #28 to #27 - jacksipian
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
lol, you must be tired, i think you've had enough internet for today.
User avatar #29 to #28 - mrturferpop
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Quite the opposite, I've been awake for maybe 3 hours or so, but yesterday I didn't get much sleep and today I've been marathon-ing TV shows, so I may need to be careful.
I tend to misspell things when I'm super tired and even leave some words out of my sentences.
User avatar #30 to #29 - jacksipian
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
you're a mess lol.
User avatar #31 to #30 - mrturferpop
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Only when I need my sleep!
#72 to #31 - repostforlife
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #73 to #72 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I'm still up.
#74 to #73 - repostforlife
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
GO. TO. SLEEP. isn't it late where you are? GO to bed or so HELP me. I will stay up with you, and when I'm dead tired you will feel horrid because I wouldn't sleep unless YOU decided to go sleep
GO. TO. SLEEP. isn't it late where you are? GO to bed or so HELP me. I will stay up with you, and when I'm dead tired you will feel horrid because I wouldn't sleep unless YOU decided to go sleep
User avatar #75 to #74 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
It's 3:26AM
User avatar #76 to #75 - repostforlife
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
yup, eastern time zone. same as me. go to bed. I won't rest until you do
User avatar #77 to #76 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I'm still watching shows, I can't sleep now.
Give me another 2-5 hours, I'll be tired as ****.
User avatar #79 to #77 - repostforlife
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
it can wait till AFTER you sleep. go sleep. you need to go sleep. because otherwise you won't be able to remember all of the shows and you will have to watch it AGAIN.

go sleep
User avatar #80 to #79 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I've only watched one show twice and it's because it's a forgettable show.
User avatar #81 to #80 - repostforlife
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
just, just GO to sleep bro, go sleep. otherwise so HELP me I will ******* force myself to stay up as well. huh, how will you like THAT. knowing that someone else is suffering because of you
User avatar #82 to #81 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I would probably find it kind of funny.
Now I wanna see how long I can stay up.
User avatar #83 to #82 - repostforlife
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
You are talking to someone who has trouble sleeping. bring it. I can MORE than pull off 30 hours sleep. so try me
User avatar #84 to #83 - mrturferpop
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I'll probably pass out soon, so don't get too excited
User avatar #85 to #84 - repostforlife
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
don't wory, I will as well. it's reaching 24hrs for me. and I have a huge mind splitting headache. I just am the kind of person who looks out for others. and staying up too late is bad for you and I am simply trying to help's all it is
User avatar #97 to #85 - mrturferpop
0 123456789123345869
(11/17/2014) [-]
I'm still up.
User avatar #32 to #31 - jacksipian
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
so go get some more sleep!
User avatar #21 - darksideofthebeast
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Plot Twist : That doctor wasn't a real doctor.
#51 to #21 - beheaded
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
#22 - anon id: a31e3347
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Mean while at my place
#96 to #22 - ffinfinity
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I was going to say fast and expensive but that works too
#70 to #22 - violated
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I use my neighbor's
I use my neighbor's
User avatar #23 to #22 - thenightmarechild
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
The last time I had sex, the browns and Lions were at the superbowl.
User avatar #38 to #23 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
I'm here for you my child.
User avatar #39 to #38 - thenightmarechild
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
? I don't really think I need advice, aside from 'get out more'.
User avatar #40 to #39 - relationshipxplain
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Get out more.

My work is done.
User avatar #41 to #40 - thenightmarechild
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Question, do you really give out advice like your brethren?
User avatar #43 to #41 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Yes.

The way I put it: my brethren have very concrete xplains. Mine is more abstract. I give out advice on relationships to the best of my knowledge. There's no 'science.' So, my xplain is a tad different.

But, to answer your question, yes.
User avatar #45 to #43 - thenightmarechild
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Alright, I need some advice. Not necessarily relationship advice, but I guess dating?
User avatar #47 to #45 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
That's my field, too. Basically I'm here for any human relationship, whether that be friends, dating, first dates, hookups, social interactions, etc.

What's up?
User avatar #48 to #47 - thenightmarechild
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Well, basically i'm a bit of a shut-in. Infact, in the last three months I've probably gone out less than a dozen times. I like being in, but I wouldn't mind some company to go with it.

I've tried dating sites and such, but most of the people I've talked to feel dry, even the ones I share interests with. Maybe it's because we're on a dating site that the convos feel stale.

I guess I'm asking where a good place is, on or offline, to meet fellow shut-ins. (And don't say the library.)
User avatar #49 to #48 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Gotta ask: how old are you?
User avatar #50 to #49 - thenightmarechild
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Wow, you're the third person this week. 22.
User avatar #54 to #50 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
Let me know if you have any questions. Like I said, my advice is more abstract. If I'm not giving the right advice just say so and I'll try to help in a different way.
User avatar #56 to #54 - thenightmarechild
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
No, I think I see what you're saying. Because people like me rarely get out it'll be unlikely we'd bump into each other in the stree, (and even if we did it would be hard to start a relationship.) My best best bet is a 'blind date' sort of thing set up by friends whom know both of us as total shut ins.

I suppose I'll just ask around with some friends, I doubt they know anyone like me though, but it's worth a try.

Thanks man. I won't go to a sports club, but maybe I can find a comic book shop or something, (I might get lucky and find a guy with a nerdy sister.)
User avatar #57 to #56 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
That's always a possibility. Just try to leave the house a little more, even for little things. Have you seen that terrible movie 'Yes Man?' Do that, except just with your friends. Don't go throwing bricks at bank windows or anything.
User avatar #53 to #50 - relationshipxplain
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/08/2014) [-]
It's just so I can get a better understanding. My advice to a 16 year old will be different than from a 22 year old, etc.

This is a little long and may go off topic:
Dating sites are, by far, the most difficult way to meet someone unless you're older. There are plenty of sites (okcupid is a prime example) where people around your age can meet and possibly hit it off, but it is quite a process. That's most likely why it's so dry. It's hard to hit it off with someone you've never met.

It sounds like you're the type of person who just likes to be at home and be comfortable. That's a good feature in someone. There are plenty of women out there who are like that/looking for similar people. You just want to meet more people/possibly meet a girl to hang out with and maybe it will lead to more.

But, the problem is that if you tend to be a hermit then it's unlikely that you will meet more people. I'm not sure if you're working/what kind of job you have, but work always brings in friends/some kind of social relationships.

Either way, no matter WHAT, you're most likely going to have to be more social in the beginning. You can't meet a woman that you can hang out with if you never meet anyone at all. Once you meet someone and you become more comfortable with each other, being shut-ins will most likely be the best time you two have together.

Even though a woman you meet may seem like more of the 'I need to do something all the time' type, it doesn't mean that you should completely shut her out. Keep your mind open to other options.

Ultimately, try to get out a little more. If you don't have a lot of friends to go do something with, that's okay. You're 22. Go to the local sports bar. Have a beer, watch the game, and just meet people. You don't have to seek the girl right away. In no time you'll find yourself a little more social and find people (including women) who you have very similar interests with.
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