tumblr at it again. . twinkle twinkle little prick you have a really tiny dick stop shaming girls for who they screw just because it isn' t you pre‘ acurate: I
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tumblr at it again

twinkle twinkle little prick
you have a really tiny dick
stop shaming girls for who they
screw
just because it isn' t you
pre‘ acurate:
I can' t hang out tomorrow I' m too
busy doing nothing alone sorry
gimme:
lfl ever see you guys in real life
I' m screaming your URL as loud
as I can
I dare you.
one time this kid sneezed in
class and i said "goodnight"
basically my social skills
i seriously laughed at this tor like 3
years
bu_ Gasparo_ ow:
it' s kinda funny how when you
get older you start to enjoy the
things you hated as a kid like
taking naps and getting
spanked
the second one was kind of
unexpected
but no one is disagreeing
I can hear my brother have sex with
his girlfriend next door and there is
just a lot of bed creaking and I just
heard her say 'Are you even trying?'
and I laughed so hard my brother
came into the room to tell me to ****
off
taillow:
is that a knife in your pocket or are
you just happy to yeah **** he' s got
a knife everyone run
my grandpa has a date tonight
and hes really old and in a
wheelchair and has to drag
around this breathing machine but
hes just sitting there waiting for
the hospice shuttle to take him to
pick up his date and he looks
EXCITED and its the cutest
thing Ne ever seen
update he came home and i asked
him how it went and he said, "i
should have taken an extra tank of
oxygen because she took my
BREATH AWAY"
today i accidentally dropped my
pencil and when i reached down to
get it i had this really awkward hand
touch with a guy that was going to
pick it up for me and he goes "oh i
see how it is" with a flirty face and i
panicked so i Just blurted 'Tm a
lesbian" and then he got really quiet
glammetal:
so i came up with a joke the other
day while i was showering
and it' s quite possibly the dumbest
thing We ever thought
but i laughed for a good five minutes
out loud in the shower
my mom thought something was
wrong with me
okay here goes; an attorney defends
a man sued for walking around town
in his underwear. it was a brief
case.
mime
when i was in tth grade a boy liked
me but i thought he was annoying,
so on the playground he tried to ask
me to be his girlfriend and i said no
and I had to think of an excuse so i
started hugging a tree and i told him
the tree was my boyfriend. then later
i saw him kicking the tree and i felt
kinda bad
I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR
TO CATCH T IN MY MOUTH
BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND
HYTHE CHUNG AND THERE
WAS A SPIDER THERE AND
THE SPIDER FELL AND SO
DID THE GRAPE AND THEY
BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE
AND I STILL HAVEN' T
STOPPED SCREAMING
I read the first line in my head in
we tune clean me maybe rm so
stupid
I threw a grape in the air
I wanna catch it I swear
It hit a spider that fell
and now they' re on my has
I ALMOST GOT INTO A CAR
CRASH JUST NOW MY LAST
WORDS WOULD' BEEN "THAT
CLOUD LOOKS LIKE A DICK."
STOP REBLOGGING THIS YOU
ASSHOLES I COULD’ DIED
IT years
nu sated
an Int
still not
More If "
we M
war
In my in
warm ma
gray m
Amau.
KIDDING
ME " BEEN
WITH
THIS SINCE I we
mus no Ts
unfunny new
uemm
WHAT ABOUT CANADA.
may
WHAT ABOUT .. 2
one time this guy was hitting on me
and he said 'Tm loving the whole
blonde hair, blue eyes thing" and I
said "so did hitler" I literally said that
to a person
my tunic insect is ill! tty because " name is actually
what , 6003
so does a use
an yes. the elusive has known for owing
you have not
experienced true panic
until you come face to
face with an
overflowing toilet
at a friend' s house
During a fancy party.
And that' s the only bathroom.
And there' s a line.
what depths of hell did you guys
spawn from
true self control is waiting until
the movie starts to eat your
popcorn
why would the movie eat my
popcorn
Mele,,
...
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Views: 86356
Favorited: 546
Submitted: 12/22/2013
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Comments(352):

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User avatar #8 - Loppytaffy (12/22/2013) [+] (6 replies)
"Achoo"
"Goodnight"
"What?"
"Gesundheit."
#3 - theexo (12/22/2013) [+] (22 replies)
User avatar #4 to #3 - captainfuckitall (12/22/2013) [-]
Looks like you forgot to log out this time.
User avatar #5 - captainfuckitall (12/22/2013) [+] (31 replies)
Most of these are just sad. If, by some strange chance most of them are NOT fake, there is no excuse for you to have so poor social skills. Seriously. Just say "hi", it's really not that hard.
User avatar #12 to #5 - lackwit (12/22/2013) [-]
WHAT THE **** DO YOU SAY AFTER HI? AN CONVERSATION DOESN'T MAGICALLY START TO WORK BECAUSE I SAID HI TO A PERSON.
#26 - pappathethird (12/22/2013) [+] (1 reply)
This is my favourite tumblr of all time
#61 - YourName (12/22/2013) [+] (3 replies)
I know people who browse tumblr religiously and they actually talk like this in real life.  Although to be fair, some of these did make me breathe out of my nose at a slightly faster rate.
I know people who browse tumblr religiously and they actually talk like this in real life. Although to be fair, some of these did make me breathe out of my nose at a slightly faster rate.
User avatar #2 - loomiss (12/22/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Why would the movie eat my popcorn.
That is just
woo
That was good
+38
#50 - mnek has deleted their comment [+] (6 replies)
#58 - teoferrazzi (12/22/2013) [+] (8 replies)
I'm pretty sure she's american actually
#186 - yuukoku (12/23/2013) [+] (29 replies)
>"I seriously laughed at this for like 3 years"

#1 - junkinator (12/22/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Sorry, I gotta fix something. Australians spell gray "GrCUNTy"
#24 - infinitereaper (12/22/2013) [+] (1 reply)
hfw "I'm a lesbian."
User avatar #233 - saintlygrim (12/23/2013) [+] (8 replies)
**saintlygrim rolls 1** + 1 = 2
#92 - weenieandthebutt (12/22/2013) [+] (46 replies)
The first one:
>Against slut-shaming
>Shames virgins
#40 - angelooo (12/22/2013) [+] (2 replies)
90% of these.
User avatar #54 to #40 - askafj ONLINE (12/22/2013) [-]
Yea, you're right, I mean 'grey' isn't even a word.
And the last one.
And an overflowing toilet doesn't make anyone panic.
And flies doesn't fly.
And he could not have possibly thought of that joke in the shower. About the brief case.
Also, no one like taking naps when they are older or getting spanked .
The first poem isn't real, it's just imaginary.

I know I seem butthurt, but you are "doubting" atleast that is what that character is mostly known for on the internet 90% of this and there are almost no stories here.
#89 - hypocritical ONLINE (12/22/2013) [-]
grG'DAYMATEy   
   
angry australian pirate
grG'DAYMATEy

angry australian pirate
#80 - gamergirlmel (12/22/2013) [+] (1 reply)
The last one was by far my favourite
The last one was by far my favourite
User avatar #282 - reginleif (12/23/2013) [+] (1 reply)
That first entry kinda shows the hypocrisy of the Feminists though....

"Don't shame the village bicycle, you virgin loser".

They want to not be shamed for their actions, yet all you hear from them is a wave of shaming style attacks on people who disagree with them.

You know the usual attacks about being virgins, sexually deficient, unmanly, small down there...

It's not shame they're fighting against, they just want to have a monopoly on the shaming power.
User avatar #73 - temporalguardian (12/22/2013) [-]
Plot twist for the grandpa date one, she actually stole one of his oxygen tanks and ran off.
User avatar #310 - mutzaki (12/23/2013) [-]
>"Don't shame girls for ******* a lot of guys."
>Shames guys with small penises.

She seems like a wonderful person.
#38 - PlagueDoctor (12/22/2013) [+] (2 replies)
the "Call me maybe" one
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