so this really embarrassing thing happened to me today and I thought I had to tell it to someone. > for simplicity
> go to the library to research the afterlife.
> sit down and start reading a book on ghosts
> 7/10 teenage girl sits down across to me, says nothing
> takes out pencils and paper and starts to draw
> continue reading but notice that shes drawing a person
> its me
> don't know how to sit,
> don't want to pose,
> feel very uncomfortable shifting around in my chair
> but then it happens. my intestines start to inflate.
> I know that Mexican for lunch is staring to take a vengeance on my imperial body.
> I stand, trying to get away before the inevitable occurs
> but it was too late. as soon as a stand the might of a thousand rhinos explode out of my anus.
> I thought it was going to be a fart but I may have overdosed on my constipation medication.
> im wearing jeans because its cold out but you can clearly see mudlava flowing into my socks.
> the girl across from me looks at me in horror, and I get a better look at her picture
> its a picture of Bill Murray
> I look her directly in her eyes and say
"no ones ever going to believe you"