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Think next time brain, please!

Tags: Ouch
Views: 35305 Submitted: 08/28/2013
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#2 - therichie
Reply +33 123456789123345869
(08/28/2013) [-]
User avatar #9 - malignantlybenign
Reply +17 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
had a similar occourance
>driving my jeep
>heading home from the historical museum I helped get going
>wearing an Ivy cap because looks good when you're a big dude with a beard
>see something wiggling on bill of cap
>must be a string this cap is getting old and the doors are off
>suddenly something is on my glasses
>no wait on the inside of my glasses what is it?
>big ass ******* wolf spider that was living in the roll bar
>tactically **** myself and maintain control over my jeep
>whip glasses off and try to shake the ****** off out the door
>get home and try to not cry myself to sleep...

no buneo
#3 - xxangelisxx
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(08/28/2013) [-]
I should be sorry for you, OP, but this is too hilarious.
User avatar #22 - jajathezombie
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
> Sitting in my car on campus between classes
> Nice day, windows down, sunroof open
> See a big ass ******* wolf spider on my dash
> Grab febreeze can on the floor
> Battlecry for courage
> "NOT TODAY ************"
> Swing bottle
> Spider jumps away
> Crawls into a crack in my door
> Holy **** it's inside my car door
> Start frantically spraying febreeze into the crack, standing on my seat at this point
> "I WILL ******* END YOU"
> Notice a huge black dude standing by a car a few spaces over
> Been watching me the whole time
> Shakes his head
> "Damn, white people be crazy..."
#39 to #22 - darshian
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
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#17 - danruaul
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
punching your dick doesn't hurt. Hurts to punch your balls.
User avatar #29 to #17 - waterbottlemanboy
Reply -2 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
For me, a dick punch is so much worse than getting hit in the balls.
#13 - geisterhaft
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
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#35 to #13 - burdenedsoul
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
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#23 to #13 - doktorandus
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
#19 - artjunk
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
Similar story happened to me the other day:
>Visit my grandparents place for family and ****
>They live out on a farm in the country and i live in the city
>Not too insanely far away so I usually enjoy a stroll to go back and forth
>Helped them out with some chores while I was over
>Loading/unloading bales of hay, feeding livestock, typical cowboy ****
>Finish up chores, have a spot of dinner then head back to my place
>Throw on my jacket I had discarded in the corner of the barn
>Nice mid afternoon, suns starting to set all beautiful and ****, so i decide to walk and catch the sight of it
>Get back to the city as afternoon foot traffic is really kicking in
>Kind of annoying but whatevs, I'm a big guy so crowds don't bug me much, plus its ****** majestic outside
>Start to feel a tickling sensation under my arm
>Must be some hay from the barn floor, try my best to ignore it
>Suddenly tickling moves up my shoulder
>An angry spartan horde of spiders erupts across my chest
>Slap myself full force in the chest with an apish grunt
>Spiders fall off but I'm sketched AS ****
>Just want to get home and shower in hydrofluoric acid but people are still bustling around everywhere
>Most everyone in the vicinity of my neanderthalic outburst is watching me at this point, like "wtfmate?"
User avatar #20 to #19 - artjunk
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
>Resist the urge to run so i just kinda pick up the pace, speedwalkin style
>Feel more tickling as I get closer to the heart of the city where I live
>Sweat beading on my brow as panic is setting in, just want get this jacket off asap
>People really getting perturbed by my rush
>Making my way down town
>Walking fast
>Faces pass and I'm home bound
#8 - falloutreaper
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(08/28/2013) [-]
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#42 - bbqbacon
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
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#14 - anon
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
this is sausage to me
#15 to #14 - utasco
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
wurst ?
User avatar #37 to #15 - alhemicar
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(08/29/2013) [-]
Aw **** you almost got me