Why me..

>Get in shower after long day of working on my car.
>Wearing finger condom because i cut my finger on car.
>soap up whole body and put shampoo in hands.
>Shampoo looks like lube on my finger condom.
>Think about sticking finger in ass
>Stick finger in ass, feels awkward and take out.
>Shampoo burns asshole with the power of a thousand suns
>Soap gets in eyes
>I scream an jump out of shower
> can't find towel with eyes closed
> open door and run out of bathroom screaming "IT BURNS SO FUCKING BAD! ITS IN MY ASS!"
>find sheet to wipe face off with.
>Look up to see girlfriend, her parents, and my mom after long day of shopping.
>Still naked and have a finger condom hanging out of ass.