Worth the read. (If you read the whole thing)
Once there was a man with a boner at the beach, he tried to hide his massive boner with a towel but frankly it was useless. A little girl walked up to him an asked "What's under the towel mister?". Embarrassed, he replied with "It's my pet bird". The man fell asleep thinking he avoided the situation. He woke up, screaming from the pain in his junk. He asked the doctor what happened and the doctor told the little girl he saw at the beach to tell him.... She said that she was angry at the bird so she broke the birds neck, cracked its eggs, and set its nest on fire. The man asked "Why would you do that!". She replied "Well, I wanted to see the bird so I looked under your towel and it spit on me when I was playing with it."