Grade A Badass. Wii ------> funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/974230/Wii/. Who Was He? When Audie Murphy names in of 16. he was 95- and weighed no pounds. The
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Grade A Badass

Who Was He?
When Audie Murphy names in of 16.
he was 95- and weighed no pounds. They laughed in his face. so he applied
hath: Air Force. andthey also laughed in his face. rhen he applied forthe
Army. and they figured they could always use another absorb
gunfire. syther let him in. He wasn' t particularly good at it andthey actually
tried to get him transferred to be a cook after he passed out halfway through
training. He insisted that he wanted to fight though so they sent him into the
maelstrom.
During the invasion of Italy he was promoted to corporal for his awesome
shooting skills. and at the same time contracted malaria. which he had For
Milk! war. Tryto rememberable.
He was sent into southern France in IBM. He Encountered a German machine
gun crew who pretended they were surrendering then shot his best buddy.
Murphy completely bulked on killed everyone inthe gun nan. then used
to kill every baddie in a radius. more
machine gun nests and a bunch of snipers. They gave him a
service Cross. and made him platoon commander while everyone apologized
profusely For lung him 'Shorty.'
About halfa year later. his company was given the job of defending the
Samar Pocket. a an I region in France. eventhough all they had left was 19
guys tout ohm orig rial 125) and a couple of Mao Tank Destroyers
The Germans showed up with a ******** of guys and halfa .
since reinforcements weren' t coming fora while. Murphy and his men
hid in a trench and sent the go do the h lifting. got
ripped to shreds.
Then. this kid with malaria ran upto one ohm
crippled . hopped in behind the so I machine gun. and started
killing everything in sight. Understand thatthe was on fire. had a
He kept going an hour until he was out of bullets. then walked
backto his bewildered men asthe we exploded inthe background Mad
Max style. They gave him literally every methyl they could in in all. although
he had doubles Ma few. plus five from France and one from Belgium's
including the Mark! of honor.
Afterthe war. he me down with . and was prescribed the
antidepressant I 'dyw. When he bame addicted to the drug, betterthan
Emma program like some kind of sissy. he went coldwar% . locked himself
in a motel room fora week and gut over it. He wrote an autobiography
entitled To Hell and Back. and later bame an actor.
The Best Hollywood could Come Up With:
Audie Murphy (Audie Murphy) from To hell and Back:
in m Hell and Back. Audie Murphy plays Audie Murphy. a bathers war hero
who proves his worth on the battlefield with his awesome baddassery. The
movie wasthe film Universal made. a record it held for "
years until the making offars. Tues rights they actually needed a movie
about a giants sharked top Audie Murphy' s awesomeness.
Why it Doesn' t compare:
When some Hollywood producer wanted to make a movie based on
Murphy' s autobiography. he was determined to rave Murphy play himself
inthe film. Murphy was afraid people would maths complete insane
awesomeness the story hadto offer. and think he was embellishing or
tryingto sh in on his fame. so he actually had them take parts out forbear
that they wouldn' t be a Hollywood audience. seiously.
...
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Views: 35043
Favorited: 451
Submitted: 09/18/2010
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Comments(347):

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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #109 - patriotic canadian (09/19/2010) [-]
this man deserves a- oh wait, he has plenty


SOMEONE GET HIM FORT KNOX OR SOMETHING
#165 - Rofltroll (09/19/2010) [+] (5 replies)
That's my dad.
#221 - JasonBourne (09/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Good times...
#14 - ultimega (09/18/2010) [-]
I think he won the game.
User avatar #211 - ToastyHero (09/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
If he was my dad, I would have to kill myself because I am not worthy enough.
#212 - awesomosaurous (09/19/2010) [-]
i think i have a new hero
User avatar #190 - WittyName (09/19/2010) [+] (4 replies)
chuck norris's brother?
#75 - Rapxivviiviir (09/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
... and right before he died he prayed to Ares and they made a video game in tribute to his badass life
#63 - FuckYeahSeaking (09/18/2010) [-]
Give this man a ******* medal.. Oh wait.
#203 - ImALion (09/19/2010) [-]
Audie Murphy>Ghost, Gaz, Price
COMBINED
#182 - BrutalAnalRapist (09/19/2010) [-]
To much Epic in 1 place
To much Epic in 1 place
User avatar #112 - MurphPSU (09/19/2010) [+] (3 replies)
Hey man next time you rip off cracked give them credit?
#294 - pandaplus (09/19/2010) [-]
Audie Murphy , international badass hero
Audie Murphy , international badass hero
#202 - mr skeltal (09/19/2010) [+] (2 replies)
this was stolen from cracked . com
User avatar #205 to #202 - thelonewizard (09/19/2010) [-]
Very bottom right corner, it gives credit to You need to login to view this link In bright red text.
#200 - kasparovnutter (09/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Why is this guy not the source of all war games?
#187 - Zare (09/19/2010) [-]
thanks for adding the source at the bottom  
i knew the article and would of thumbed it down, but you gave credit
thanks for adding the source at the bottom
i knew the article and would of thumbed it down, but you gave credit
#110 - roflerman (09/19/2010) [-]
with Audie Murphey driving
User avatar #106 - KEpToK (09/19/2010) [+] (1 reply)
Unfortunately, after driving a Commercial Flight Jet Liner with his penis, and subsequently breaking the steering wheel, causing the plane to go out of control. He then tried to use said penis AS the wheel, but stabbed a hole in the bottom of the fuselage when he tried to connect his penis to the steering column.
#114 to #106 - mr skeltal (09/19/2010) [-]
somebody has an obsetion of penis...
#23 - derpasaurusrex **User deleted account** (09/18/2010) [+] (1 reply)
#22 - demented (09/18/2010) [-]
I didn't know Chuck Norris had a twin; I figured he would have killed him in the womb.
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