Some Funny Jokes pt 4. Hope you enjoyed my pt 4 funny jokes brought to you by popular demand!<br /> Pt 5 is out!<br /> funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/ jokes funny jokes PwnedByADuck
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Some Funny Jokes pt 4

Hope you enjoyed my pt 4 funny jokes brought to you by popular demand!<br />
Pt 5 is out!<br />
funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/632163/Some+Funny+Jokes+pt+5/

Some Funny Jokes pt 4
Well here it is pt 4, brought to you by popular demand!
I hope you like the added pictures a friend of mine gave me the
idea.
Don' t forget to thumb either up or down feedback is greatly
appreciated!
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15
years. He breaks into a house to look for money and
guns and finds amoung couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair,
while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her,
kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the
bathroom.
While he' s in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen,
this guy' s an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He
probably spent lots ertime in jail and hasn' t seen a
woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he
wants don' t resist, don' t complain, do whatever he
tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates
you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets
angry, he' ll Ell us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn' t kissing my
neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was
gay, thought you were cute, and asked me ifhe had
any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be
strong honey. I love you toole"
lam aware most of you probably heard this and it may be a retoast but come on its
so funny I gotta make sure everyone gets the chance to read it :D
A child was continually asking his Mom
to buy him a hamster.
When she did, the child looked after it for
a couple of days, but soon he got bored,
and it became the Mom' s responsibility
to feed it.
One day she got upset with the her son' s
carelessness and asked him, "How
many times do you think this hamster
would have died until now, ifl wasn' t
looking after it?"
The child replied, "Um, I don' t know.
once?"
A man was crossing a road one day when a frog
called out to him and said, "ffyou kiss me, I' ll turn
into a beautiful princess."
He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his
pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "ffyou kiss me
and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will tell
everyone how smart and brave you are and how
you are my hero" The man took the frog out of his
pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "ffyou kiss me
and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will be
your loving companion for an entire week." The
man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and
returned it to his pocket.
The frog then cried out, "ffyou kiss me and turn me
back into a princess, I' ll stay with you for a year and
do ANYTHING you want." Again the man took the
frog out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I' told
you I' m a beautiful princess, that I' ll stay with you for
a year and do anything you want. Why won' t you
kiss me?"
The man said, "Look, I' m a computer programmer. I
don' t have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is
Would you kiss this?
Cannibals capture three men. The men are told
that they will be skinned and eaten and then
their skin will be used to make canoes. Then
they are each given a final request. The first
man asks to be killed
as quickly and painlessly as possible. His
request is granted, and they poison him. The
second man asks for paper and a pen so that
he can write a farewell letter to his family. This
request is granted,
and after he writes his letter, him
saving his skin for their canoes. Now it is the
third man' s turn. He asks for a fork. The
cannibals are confused, but it is his final
request, so they give
him aford. As soon as he has the fork he
begins stabbing himself all over and shouts,
To hell with your canoes!"
...
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Comments(249):

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User avatar #44 - anujgamer (07/18/2010) [+] (5 replies)
Frog: Kiss me! I am a beautiful princess trapped in the body of a frog.
Guy: Its just like the fairytales. Ok, here goes!
*SMOOCH*
Guy: What? Why didn't you turn into a princess?
Frog: Haha bitch. I am a poisonous frog.
+39
#34 - thuntking **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (1 reply)
#46 - anonymous (07/18/2010) [+] (2 replies)
Can someone explain the last one to me?
User avatar #47 to #46 - OriginalDH (07/18/2010) [-]
If his skin has holes in it...they can't make a canoe out of his skin. Durhurr
#217 - jeevdunurnan **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [+] (3 replies)
why not just ask not to be killed?
User avatar #11 - armadda (07/18/2010) [-]
I thumbed for the last one.
User avatar #138 - NoSenss (07/19/2010) [-]
3 men are captured by a native tribe. the chief gives each man two options. death, or kubooga booga. the 1st man says kubooga booga. the chief says "ok you will be raped a thousand times in the ass". the next guy is asked. death, or kubooga booga? he says kubooga booga (not hearing what it meant after the 1st man was asked) the chief says "ok u will b raped in the ass 10000 times". then he asks the 3rd man. he answers "i will take death". the chief looks at him and says "ok...
..death by kubooga booga!"
+9
#79 - TheJoeMyster **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#101 - killedkenny **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [+] (3 replies)
I'm not reading all this WTF
#102 to #101 - Rawkfish **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [-]
have fun not laughing lol
User avatar #26 - GeneralZCD (07/18/2010) [+] (1 reply)
on the last one, since they would listen to ur last request, wouldnt it be smart to ask to leave?
#201 - TheRobotDevil **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
User avatar #110 - Brutalmetal (07/18/2010) [+] (3 replies)
i was expecting him to kill them with a fork :P
#105 - harpieladd **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [+] (2 replies)
rofl XD "To hell with your canoes!"
rofl
#98 - Djwosco (07/18/2010) [+] (2 replies)
Didn't there use to be a section for jokes on fj? What happend to that?
User avatar #54 - tham (07/18/2010) [+] (19 replies)
I don't get the last one..
User avatar #70 to #54 - adamferrare (07/18/2010) [-]
**** YOU!!!! his skin will be used for the boat. when his skin has holes, then they use his skin for the boat, the boat sinks, because it has holes in it.
#45 - DarkChoclate **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [-]
the last one made me laugh
User avatar #50 - cph (07/18/2010) [-]
i would ask for unlimited wishes
then rape and pillage the village
#154 - anonymous (07/19/2010) [+] (5 replies)
**anonymous rolls 659,512,886** QUADS AND I GO TO COLLEGE!
#166 to #158 - seanysmiley **User deleted account** (07/19/2010) [-]
Nobody has ever succeeded at rolling 10.
#28 - Muffinos **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [+] (5 replies)
knock knock
#37 to #36 - Muffinos **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [-]
your mom
*trollface*
User avatar #99 - DaogatPiva (07/18/2010) [+] (4 replies)
I would try asking not to kill me before i asked for a fork.
#18 - PwnedByADuck **User deleted account** (07/18/2010) [+] (6 replies)
Thanks you for the feedback everyone, I will make another one either tomorrow or tuesday.

Anyone let me know if you think this is a good enough length or you feel it should be shorter or longer please

thanks again :)
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