truth. . RUBBING BATIK Mil FORWARD WHEN YOU ARE ON TOP DOESN' T GOOD TRY UP AND . I' M BUMMING" DOESN' T ARWAYS MEAN SOMETIMES IS HIST m OPPOSITE HE TO IF HIS P truth RUBBING BATIK Mil FORWARD WHEN YOU ARE ON TOP DOESN' T GOOD TRY UP AND I' M BUMMING" ARWAYS MEAN SOMETIMES IS HIST m OPPOSITE HE TO IF HIS P
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truth

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RUBBING BATIK Mil FORWARD
WHEN YOU ARE ON TOP DOESN' T GOOD
TRY UP AND .
I' M BUMMING" DOESN' T ARWAYS MEAN
SOMETIMES IS HIST m OPPOSITE
HE TO
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ER INTO Ills EAR My DIRTY
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WITH CONFIDENCE ANILINE IT
um mm: EVERYTHING instea
FORGET ABOUT BEDS
ANYTIME, : 1
JUST HEM! T n HM Mild
ASH HIM WHAT HE um
NE KNOWS EXACTKY WHAT] IT IS AND
HE Wt YOUDABEST
DON' T ARON YOUR
BAGN UPWARDS
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IT' S smug nun mu T
Tell HIM WHEN YOU' RE ABOUT TO GUM
THE FIRST TIMES In HAVE SEX
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HE DOESN' T IT ROUGH EVERY
DAY OF THE WEEK
ctr,
TRY GOING SLOW Till‘ THE END
m THREE WORDS FOR A PERFECT :
tnmn ,
TRY BEING DOMINANT SOMETIMES
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And maybe the most important one...
BE YOUR BODY
itov
IF HE IS HAVING SEI( Y. I_ ‘ AITH YOU’?
HE EVERY PART OF I
Jam
...
+1416
Views: 62286 Submitted: 09/04/2013
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[ 555 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #8 - lolokoko **User deleted account**
Reply +694 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Giving sex tips to Funnyjunk is like giving diet pills to skinny people.
User avatar #300 to #8 - sinclairr
Reply -6 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
i duno i r have the sex many time

Seriously though not everyone who goes on a website to laugh becomes a virgin for life, or stays a virgin, or some ****.
#111 to #8 - anon id: 6695ff07
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Not sure if because don't have sex or because already pro at sex
#181 to #8 - anon id: db040291
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Your comparison was flawed yet got incredible up votes, what you just implied was that funnyjunk users get so many girls as is that they dont need sex tips because they already got all the best moves...
Hence: diet pills (sex tips); skinny people [Someone whom wont need a diet pill as he is already skinny] (FJ users).

See the issue?
#538 to #8 - oxYKellark
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#548 to #8 - anon id: 496f8f8a
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
ASIANS CAN ACTUALLY READ MINDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
They can hear, and see what you're visually thinking. This is the absolute complete truth!!!!!

Asians hide their mind reading abilities by a lot of them having completely expressionless faces so they don't accidentally show facial expressions when people think things they don't like, find funny, astonishing, etc, and Asians segregate so their not nearly as susceptible to that happening.
Asians also segregate, and are untalkative to avoid accidentally saying things that are similar to what people are thinking and going to say.

Try thinking, and visually picturing things that are as wild as you can when you are around Asians, and look for Asians who give people dirty/particular looks for what appears to be for completely no reason.

PLEASE SPREAD THE MESSAGE!!!!! THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW THIS!!!!!
#431 to #8 - DCat
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
#547 to #8 - nizarut
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Are you saying we get laid so much that we don't need tips?
#217 to #8 - sedativechunk
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
**sedativechunk rolled a random image posted in comment #37 at Passing a drug test ** mfw when your comment applies to me
#109 to #8 - hurblurb
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
That would be implying we are already having sex.
More like giving diet pills to people who can't swallow pills.
User avatar #537 to #8 - swimmingprodigy
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
>implying we dont need sex tips because we're already good at sex



thanks for the compliment



wait.


****.
User avatar #250 to #8 - lolokoko **User deleted account**
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
You guys really blew this out of proportion.

Carry on
#28 to #8 - captainoptimist
Reply +60 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
That's a bad analogy. You're trying to imply that people on FJ are losers and will never have sex. But giving diet pills to skinny people is pointless because they are ALREADY skinny and don't NEED them. So, that implies that people on FJ are already awesome at sex and don't need tips.

Better analogy: Giving sex tips to Funnyjunk is like giving a waffle iron to a fish.
User avatar #282 to #28 - zombiepipboy
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I think he was implying that they don't need them, but I like your analogy as well
User avatar #9 to #8 - vexaton
Reply +98 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Giving sex tips to Funnyjunk is like giving sex tips to any other place on the internet... People who are sexually active will appreciate the tips, people who pretend to be appreciate the opportunity to brag, and the people who are lonely will take the opportunity to generalize the rest of the internet as betas.

I for one, appreciate the tips. Even though I know them already, I don't think my fiance knows them, and frankly, she loves sex too much to deny something that will spice things up a bit.
#51 to #9 - raditaz
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Well said man
User avatar #52 to #51 - vexaton
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Thanks
#550 to #52 - anon id: 496f8f8a
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
ASIANS CAN ACTUALLY READ MINDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
They can hear, and see what you're visually thinking. This is the absolute complete truth!!!!!

Asians hide their mind reading abilities by a lot of them having completely expressionless faces so they don't accidentally show facial expressions when people think things they don't like, find funny, astonishing, etc, and Asians segregate so their not nearly as susceptible to that happening.
Asians also segregate, and are untalkative to avoid accidentally saying things that are similar to what people are thinking and going to say.

Try thinking, and visually picturing things that are as wild as you can when you are around Asians, and look for Asians who give people dirty/particular looks for what appears to be for completely no reason.

PLEASE SPREAD THE MESSAGE!!!!! THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW THIS!!!!!
User avatar #495 to #9 - gardenmanly
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
I was logged out a second ago, and I saw that the word "spice" was censored...

Why on earth is the word spice censored. Should I feel dirty while making a spice cake. or when watering my spice garden, or when going through my spice cabinet?
Does this explain the 3 powerpuff girls and why buttercup is so vulgar? With Bubbles being the sugar, Buttercup being the spice, Blossom being everything nice?

#525 to #495 - Willmooo
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
He who controls the spice, controls the universe
User avatar #292 to #9 - crazehtoast
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I remember them for the future.
#49 to #9 - anon id: cc4267c1
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
k
#57 - megazman
Reply +624 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
User avatar #435 to #57 - Battlescarss
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
This is great.
#549 to #57 - anon id: 496f8f8a
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
ASIANS CAN ACTUALLY READ MINDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
They can hear, and see what you're visually thinking. This is the absolute complete truth!!!!!

Asians hide their mind reading abilities by a lot of them having completely expressionless faces so they don't accidentally show facial expressions when people think things they don't like, find funny, astonishing, etc, and Asians segregate so their not nearly as susceptible to that happening.
Asians also segregate, and are untalkative to avoid accidentally saying things that are similar to what people are thinking and going to say.

Try thinking, and visually picturing things that are as wild as you can when you are around Asians, and look for Asians who give people dirty/particular looks for what appears to be for completely no reason.

PLEASE SPREAD THE MESSAGE!!!!! THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW THIS!!!!!
User avatar #198 to #57 - mrcowll
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Yea... The whole caressed one could be a lie. I'm extremely ticklish so it ends up with a lot of laughter.
User avatar #333 to #198 - ompalomper
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
this comment made me wonder what would happen if you had a ticklefight during sex

i bet it would be really chaotic and awkward but the though is hilarious
User avatar #554 to #333 - Shadow Guardian
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
It's really fun. It just depends on the kind of sex and the kind of tickles.
User avatar #338 to #333 - mrcowll
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
I laugh myself to tears so it's really ******* awkward. It's so bad so if you poke me in the ribs I'll jump. I can barely ******* breath. I make it very clear about my tickling issues in any relationship though... but they always feel the need to try it out.
User avatar #61 - zumbs
Reply +84 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Okay but now teach the guys how to please girls.
#272 to #61 - orangegoblin
-1 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #567 to #272 - danniegurl
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/08/2013) [-]
how would you like if someone bit the tip of your dick?
no girl would like someone biting it.
User avatar #94 to #61 - texasbarbie
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
yes please?
User avatar #108 to #61 - gotbannedicusvile
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
takes time. But once you find her spot its easy.
#235 to #61 - anon id: dc5bcfaa
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Guys know how to please girls
You just pick the assholes who don't care about you like ~all other girls do
Save your red thumbs posting as anon, but everyone knows this is the truth
User avatar #560 to #235 - zumbs
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Sorry, you dropped your fedora.
#469 to #61 - adorableness
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Then you'll have to order my next tape.
#200 to #61 - retfarcenim
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#218 to #61 - leachan **User deleted account**
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Step one: touch clitoris   
   
You have now pleased a woman.   
   
(source: I have a vagina)
Step one: touch clitoris

You have now pleased a woman.

(source: I have a vagina)
User avatar #65 to #61 - lolollo
Reply +14 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Step one: Find a girl who isn't inept at communicating what she wants out of sex.

And we're done...
User avatar #68 to #65 - skeptical
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
such hard
trying impossible
#62 to #61 - infinitereaper
Reply +282 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I'm afraid that volume 6 hasn't been completed yet.
#76 - matralith
Reply +133 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Relatable

User avatar #480 to #76 - imaginariness
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Ouch dude
User avatar #343 to #76 - elcreepo
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
So teach her, because if she does it that way nobody honestly taught her.

And it is tricky to suck a cock, takes practice and time to make it so that your teeth aren't in the way.
User avatar #24 - connorjay
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
To the "Men like being caressed too" one, I ******* hate being touched in any sort of way like this.

Id rather do all the touching etc.
User avatar #35 to #24 - CaptainPugwash
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I hate to break it to you, but I think you might be autistic.
Test: An old schoolfriend says hi and hugs you. Do you:
a) Say hi and hug back, or
b) Scream, punch her in the face and run off?
User avatar #38 to #35 - connorjay
Reply +118 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Don't get me wrong, I put up with it, and I'll hug back. And I'm okay with that.
It's like being poked, I ******* hate it... It's hard to explain
And I have a girlfriend who I love etc.
It's just like I'd rather not be touched.

Especially if she tries touching my fedora.

#129 to #38 - unholyjebus
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
But how do you put on and remove your fedora if your girlfriend isn't allowed to touch it?

your hand is your girlfriend...
User avatar #153 to #129 - connorjay
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I'm confused

Why would you ever want to take off your fedora?
#170 to #153 - unholyjebus
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
To have a shower... wait... nevermind.
#82 to #38 - ilikecows **User deleted account**
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
#399 to #38 - metzie
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
lel
#112 to #38 - anon id: 71611b0d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I ******* knew it
#155 to #24 - flibberdigibber
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I knew I'd find you here
User avatar #172 to #155 - connorjay
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Funnyjunk is how I kill time before Uni!

Took me a while to remember your name, I won't lie!
#16 - nagafever
Reply +90 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
**nagafever rolled a random image posted in comment #3552615 at Friendly ** I don't mind socks... anything to cover up the feet honestly
#66 to #16 - anon id: 28a8dc27
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
crocks?
#283 to #16 - burnitup
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
...i like feet
User avatar #54 to #16 - makonendrak
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Yeah, I ******* hate feet
#288 to #16 - twofreegerbils
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Just /k/ things <3
#330 to #16 - nagafever
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
**nagafever rolled a random image posted in comment #34809 at Drawing & Art - drawing games, drawing online, how to draw, drawing lessons online ** and i'm just sitting here wondering if people agree with me or they just like my roll
User avatar #56 to #16 - elynichujy
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Thigh-high socks are extremely hnng.
#43 - littlejessicaxox
Reply +82 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I found this one and highly disagree
User avatar #346 to #43 - elcreepo
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
But... hot balls against your crotch is an invitation and should be treated like such!
#460 to #43 - anon id: 750958b6
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
We can't hide our boners. Without our boners, there will be no poking for the appropriate part.
#265 to #43 - keirabarnez
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Yes, yes it does.
User avatar #266 to #265 - littlejessicaxox
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
It is the way that 85% of my sexual encounters have begun
User avatar #286 to #43 - hotsaws
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Well it would depend for me.
Going to bed at night: Oh how nice. Lets ****.
Waking up in the morning: ***** get your dick out my ass.
#100 - notafunnyguy
Reply +12 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
um **** you . when the girl goes back and fourth really fast when shes on top, its ******* amazing because her body is jerking you off harder and tighter and faster. up and down is boring and cliched.
#277 to #100 - infinitesinz
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I hate the back and forth ****, I can't feel anything at all when she does that, I just wait through it until she starts KIND OF going up and down.
User avatar #347 to #277 - elcreepo
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
It's painful for me when she does that. So I just teach her to lean back and ride it. Or go side to side, that's even better.
User avatar #539 to #347 - thighhighkneesocks
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Are sexual preferences just getting thumbed down now? Good god gentlemen!
User avatar #508 to #100 - nighkey
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
And to be honest it feels better for the lady, hence why they do it at all. Not all but MOST women only take top because they want to please their partner/feel sexy or confident. And that part does feel pretty amazing. =) But the actual 'oh my god I'm going to cum' only happens (for most) when they do that forward and back thing. Hits ALL the right places. *Drool*

So enjoy the view while she does it, and she'll probably change to up and down to make you happy when she is ready to swap and enjoy the view.

Source: Born with clit. =/
User avatar #173 to #100 - lumpwump
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
side to side master race
#102 to #100 - danielesq
Reply +49 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #114 to #102 - repostforlife
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
*small Mexican child part of joke*
#86 - pappathethird
Reply +35 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
What the hell is wrong with socks? I get that a guy shouldn't be wearing them, but I can think of few things sexier than a cute girl in nothing but her socks
User avatar #236 to #86 - horsecrab
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
Socks are adorable, but feel ******* weird to the skin. It's cute looking, but feels unnatural compared to bare skin.

Everyone is different though.
User avatar #87 to #86 - azumeow
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(09/04/2013) [-]
I was actually planning to say something too when I saw that.

Socks are adorable.
#355 - darknemisis
Reply +25 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Socks are the ******* ****...
User avatar #384 to #355 - acask
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
only the tall ones none of the ankle ones tho
#411 to #384 - Gonenuts
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
I personally love all socks on a beautiful girl. Still the tall ones are the bomb! Specially the white and black ones that go well above the knee.
User avatar #412 to #411 - acask
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
true dat have a thumb
#474 to #412 - Gonenuts
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
Thanks. Would give you one in return, but I'm not yet level 2.
User avatar #475 to #474 - acask
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
is ok
User avatar #370 to #355 - Kabutops
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
honeslty in my opinion they look good on certain girls
#472 to #355 - timetravelzero
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(09/05/2013) [-]
inb4 flagged for 2sexy4SFW