Only on 4chan. . C) Anonymous (/ 11( Fri) 19: 03 tehgod, 3 Working at "Special Smiles“ summer camp Detaching kids about mun animals with real animals Hie lo pig
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C) Anonymous (/ 11( Fri) 19: 03
tehgod, 3
Working at "Special Smiles“ summer camp
Detaching kids about mun animals with real animals
Hie lo pig pen
tell kids not to go into pen
mud In help a kid with tying mes
Allar loud splat noise
saturn mud
4 retard kids in pig pen, literally nailing in mud making "Dink" noises
spics start pushing them because they are in their space
strength comes out
battle between pigs and retards happens
delay in stepping this because of the hilarity of the situation
spics knock retards ever on tap of each other
r: -Mass retard pile
win
...
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#11 - grandtheftkoala **User deleted account** (07/23/2013) [+] (18 replies)
This is probably the greatest greentext ever
#3 - badjokesjimmmy (07/23/2013) [+] (37 replies)
still my alltime favourite greentext
#33 - rambomanthree (07/23/2013) [+] (8 replies)
My tard story

>1st day of 5th grade
>new kid named billy in class
>lets just say billy is a couple nuggets short of a happy meal.
>class starts, billy is in the back crushing up his gram crackers from breakfast and snorting them like cocaine
>tard tamer, who is a ww2 vet and is like 90 comes up "billy, stop it"
>billy screaches like a parrot and runs around the room flipping over desks
>tard tamer tries to do something but cant
>billy goes on until he gets tired and sits the **** down

>MFW this happened every day

He would also save fruit in his locker and let it rot, on special occasions he would throw it at the board while the teacher was teaching. and run out yelling.

Good times man
User avatar #15 - xodia (07/23/2013) [+] (6 replies)
Does anyone have the green text of Fats Mcgee and his retard three?
#40 - thascomrad (07/23/2013) [+] (8 replies)
My favurite greentext
User avatar #128 - joshkroger (07/24/2013) [+] (2 replies)
>Sophomore year in High School
>Go to the restroom during lunch
>Tard using the urinal with his pants around his ankles - bare ass showing
>I shrug and just use the one furthest away
>I finish pissing and hes facing toward me
>He bends over to pull up his pants
>A person walks into the bathroom and gets a face full of tard ass
>His eyes widen and just makes an immediate U-turn out of the bathroom
>I proceed to cry of laughter
#122 - hairysmellyanus ONLINE (07/24/2013) [+] (16 replies)
I win. OC btw. I posted it on /b/
#104 - walkerjam (07/23/2013) [+] (1 reply)
A classic.
#82 - vissova (07/23/2013) [+] (1 reply)
For two years my school thought I had ADHD or some **** when really I have an autism that makes it slightly harder for me to learn. Long story short I spent those two years in a small program for "challenged" kids. It was awful. Here's one of the many beautiful moments that came with the experience:
>First day at the special needs program
>So far so good. Everyone's nice
>Notice this kid wearing a backwards hat and fake gold dollar signs around his neck
>He's scraping his desk with his teeth
>wtf
>Teacher asks him to take his hat off
>Assuming by the way she asked him, it'd say she knows him well
>He immediately flips the **** out
>Flips his desk, pencils and paper everywhere
>Yells "THE TEACHER AND CAMRON ARE GONNA **** RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW!!!!!"
>Walks backwards with his middle fingers up in the air into the quiet room (the quiet room was basically a padded room for lunatics except used for a time out)
>As he walks into the room he flips a table that had crayons
>Thousands of crayons cover the floor
>Everyone goes right to picking it all up and cleaning as if this happens on a daily basis
>mfw I have to put up with this for two years.
#87 to #82 - vissova (07/23/2013) [-]
I got one more. This one is maybe a month after the story I just told.   
>It's recess   
>On the swing set with my good friend Jason   
>We're telling jokes and having ourselves a giggle   
>I make a boner joke   
>He asks what a boner is   
>Teacher hears him and right away comes racing over   
>Forces me and Jason to go back into the building and into the quiet room   
>The whole way back he's screaming "WHAT'S A BONER!?"   
>Teacher won't respond   
>We're back in the building   
>Jason flips 						****					 with the passion of a thousand burning suns exploding in unison    
>Tears the fire hydrant off the wall   
>Begins spraying that 						****					 literally everywhere   
>The teachers keep everybody on the other side of the door   
>He's near the only exit   
>Another kid is sitting at the table were Jason is being covered in fire hydrant jizz   
>The entire room is full of thick smokey 						****					 now and all I could hear was "WHAT'S A 						*******					 BONER"   
>Cops arrive and take him home   
>As I sit back in my seat, I can hear him screaming "boner" as he's driven away   
>mfw this whole thing
I got one more. This one is maybe a month after the story I just told.
>It's recess
>On the swing set with my good friend Jason
>We're telling jokes and having ourselves a giggle
>I make a boner joke
>He asks what a boner is
>Teacher hears him and right away comes racing over
>Forces me and Jason to go back into the building and into the quiet room
>The whole way back he's screaming "WHAT'S A BONER!?"
>Teacher won't respond
>We're back in the building
>Jason flips **** with the passion of a thousand burning suns exploding in unison
>Tears the fire hydrant off the wall
>Begins spraying that **** literally everywhere
>The teachers keep everybody on the other side of the door
>He's near the only exit
>Another kid is sitting at the table were Jason is being covered in fire hydrant jizz
>The entire room is full of thick smokey **** now and all I could hear was "WHAT'S A ******* BONER"
>Cops arrive and take him home
>As I sit back in my seat, I can hear him screaming "boner" as he's driven away
>mfw this whole thing
#108 - carlsaganrealness (07/23/2013) [+] (10 replies)
gather round ******* , it's tard story time

>Be me
>Senior in high school, in study hall
>Tard orc Jesse is there
>Sits next to relatively cute girl, 8/10, would do stuff and things to
>For some unknown reason Jesse is singing the theme song to The Grimm Adventures of Billy and Mandy
>Girl politely asks tard orc to stop, since she was trying to sleep
>NOOO
>Keeps singing
>Girl asks again to stop
>NOOOOOOO
>Tard orc is still going at it
>Girl's Jimmies have been compromised
>"If you don't stop I'm telling the teacher"
>NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
>Tard orc backhands her with the speed of the Mach 5
>Critical hit, head smashes into the table
>Teacher finally does something and calls security
>As tard orc leaves, he says innocently "But what did I do? What did I do?"
#153 - edgeomatic (07/24/2013) [-]
That'll do pig... that'll do
#184 - Cambro (07/24/2013) [+] (6 replies)
HUGE, but a classic: Fats McGee and the Retards Three
#7 - nooneofinterest (07/23/2013) [-]
I used to go to school with a tard. He minded his own business and forced himself to be socially acceptable. He wasn't a little cunt like they normally are
I used to go to school with a tard. He minded his own business and forced himself to be socially acceptable. He wasn't a little cunt like they normally are
#235 - ishotthedeputy (07/24/2013) [-]
>Be pig
>Minding my own business. Doing pig ****
>Oh god they're back
>Let out a warning squeal so the retards are scared
>Doesn't stop them
>He comes in and ***** **** up
> **************************************** .jpg
>Gang up on the bastards
>They fight back
>Fatalities must occur
>Successfully curb stomp their asses
#206 - yorker (07/24/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Well, not "only on 4chan" anymore. Since it's now on FunnyJunk. Since you posted it here.
Well, not "only on 4chan" anymore. Since it's now on FunnyJunk. Since you posted it here.
User avatar #50 - dashgamer (07/23/2013) [+] (3 replies)
>In bootcamp
>Halfway through, we get a new recruit that's been kicked out of three platoons already. It's ******* impossible to be that stupid, but he's either getting the EGA with us or getting a discharge before he even starts.
>This guy can't do anything right. When he gets IT'd (Intensive Training, meaning the DI has you do a billion workouts at once), he'd always give up two minutes in. So the killhat would be telling them to be pushups, but he wouldn't do them.
>Killhat starts screaming "Is this your master plan? To make all the other recruits suffer more while you sit there like a bitch? The longer you give up, the longer they stay here!" Everybody hates this kid. "Say that your master plan is working! SAY IT!"
>You hear a weak moan through the barracks as this kid says with every bit of misery he can muster "My master plan is working! It's working!"
>Eventually, the DIs get tired and have us scream at him instead. We all get in a circle, seven dudes just crowded around this guy like some ********* bukkake, just screaming at him for an hour.
>I see him three years later in the fleet.
>Cooking my meals at the chow hall.
>Private
>Potato face glistening in the heat of the grills
>The Few and the Proud...
#224 - Cleavland Steamer (07/24/2013) [-]
the school i went to in detroit had this downy named jared. he was the greatest retard ever, a true legend. he was what all brain damaged individuals wished they could be; the envy of pathetic tards who can do nothing but convulse while muttering nonsense and trying to bite their own ears.

jared stole ties (we had ****** uniforms) and flushed them down the toilet. he constantly hit on girls, grabbed their asses, and once surprise dry humped my ex girlfriend. jared threw tantrums, swore like a sailor with tourettes, and beat the **** out of kids for no reason.

he learned so much potty language just by being in a city school, that at one point he started calling other people retarded, and insulting them people by saying they had down syndrome

oh and he was black
#90 - commandwolf (07/23/2013) [+] (2 replies)
One of the first greentext stories I ever read.
#31 - godofcorndog (07/23/2013) [-]
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