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#255 - thechosentroll (07/23/2013) [-]
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I've wondered about that a couple of times and here's the conclusions I've come to:

1. If you don't have too many sins, you'll go to heaven. I doubt you'll be able to commit any sins there, so basically, your eternity will be as bland and boring as your life was. Some people like that, but for others that's a nightmare.
2. Where do the people who don't want a boring afterlife go? Hell. There they can **** like rabbits, get wasted 24/7 and cheat Hitler at poker. Basically, the kickass version of heaven. And all the fiery pits and demons torturing people are just the masochistic/ **** part of hell, where they can live out their ********* . Because, let's be honest, more than a few people can barely contain their wiener fluids at the thought of being whipped by a hot demon chick.

This has been the blasphemy corner with mr. Chosen. Tune in next time to hear about why you'll be reincarnated as a tape worm if you're hindu and an ******* .
#377 to #255 - anonymous (07/23/2013) [-]
well, the biblical version of heaven is more opposite than that. when we do something on earth, we usually do it for the good feeling. In heaven and hell those two events, the doing and the feeling, will be taken apart. In hell, there will only be doing and none of the feeling. In Heaven, there will only be feeling.

that's what i've managed to get, at least.
#338 to #255 - radtroll (07/23/2013) [-]
in heaven, nothing is not allowed, you get to **** anyone and everyone you desire, there are rivers of beer, fruits and trees and all sorts of unimaginable luxuries, but the most important is knowledge, you never wonder about god anymore, you feel absolutely satisfied, and you can go to hell and see people getting tortured in there and be like whoa ,, glad I prayed in the first life or my ass will be boiling down there with them, then go back to heaven and do anything you can imagine ... be like I need wings, 2 fine girls, and lets hit club heaven and snort coke for the next 100,000 years.

This is the closest I can describe heaven from a Muslim point of view, you can check it in the Qura'an yourself
User avatar #351 to #338 - thechosentroll (07/23/2013) [-]
I'm starting to understand why people are willing to die for that.
#327 to #255 - anonymous (07/23/2013) [-]
But, the purpose of heaven is so you CAN sin. It's like- refrain from it for 70 years or so then have it for eternity. And the Satan doesnt rule Hell exactly, people seem to interpret him as the warden of hell. He's just being punished there. You go to hell and you are tortured for eternity. I suppose theres different interpretations but sadly most passages in the bible point towards this.
User avatar #326 to #255 - sexyhimself ONLINE (07/23/2013) [-]
you van pretty much get away with everything according to Christianity since "God forgives" and all that
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#335 to #326 - infernis has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #383 to #335 - sexyhimself ONLINE (07/23/2013) [-]
yeah, I guess
not my problem thou
User avatar #283 to #255 - lesolan (07/23/2013) [-]
Aw, man. I freaking love getting hits of TCT.
User avatar #284 to #283 - thechosentroll (07/23/2013) [-]
The hell's TCT?
User avatar #305 to #284 - lesolan (07/23/2013) [-]
TheChosentroll
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