in no way was harry just like his father.

James Potter was a classic jock douche-bag, while Snape was just a quiet nerd who got bullied for being introverted.

James Potter (and to be fair his friends as well) spent there time goofing, off breaking rules for fun, and basically doing a lot of the stuff Harry did for entirely wrong reasons.

Snape created an alter-ego for himself, didn't get the girl he fell in love with, and even died for his love's child 18 years after her death. Who do you see as being closer to you. Heck at one point Harry, imagines the Half-Blood Prince was his father. I feel like snape would have been a much better and more loving father than James.

Harry looks like James because James was a douche who wanted his son to be just like him, this reminded Snape of James constantly and he couldn't get past it, but in the end Harry's character was his own.

You are of course right that James mellowed out, but i was talking about their time at hogwarts, where he was a first class ass.

Another thing is, if Lily had married Snape instead would James have accepted Voldemort's recruitment opportunity out of anger? would their positions have been somewhat reversed? and if so would James have even had the ability to love Lily long enough to become a double agent?

Based on their personalities coming out of Hogwarts, my opinion is that the answer to the first two questions is yes and the last is no.

TLDR: If Lily had married Snape, Voldemort would have won

I would say that Harry is exactly like James, but expresses it differently, both are arrogant, but are pretty weak alone, and are only truly formidable while with their friends. They both care for their friends to the point of risking their lives for each other, etc.
As far as their personality they are quite similar, except Harry has the virtue from Lily that James lacked.

maybe i was little harsh in some of the characteristics he may have inherited from his dad, but does Harry ever torment someone for entertainment? I pretty sure he doesn't.

I don't see where Harry is arrogant at all, if he were arrogant he wouldn't be able to stand that Hermione is better than him at just about everything.
As to being weak alone, the whole point of him being the chosen one or whatever is that he is the one destined to fight Voldemort alone, Neville the other chosen one is the one who works well with support and friends.
There is no evidence that James sacrificed anything for his friends. but there is no evidence either way so no argument

Harry is arrogant enough to believe that only he can do certain things, when the very nature of a prophecy is that it is self-fulfilling, if he simply said "I am not this important" then the entire thing would have ended, not to mention him being the chosen one meant that he had to die when he faced voldemort.
Not to mention James risked his life every month to spend the full moon in the screaming shack, and then he died to try and give Lily and Harry time to live.

Thank you for showing me where i was wrong, in that Harry is somewhat arrogant, but it is in a different league from James' I'm the best quidditch player in the school arrogance which leads to his tormenting of Snape and his assumption that Lily will like him because of it.

James didn't spend every month in the shrieking shack with Lupin, he made his other friends learn to shape shift so he could let Lupin loose on the grounds every month. While it is commendable that he wanted to let Lupin run free, it is arrogance that makes him believe he can stop Lupin from hurting people just by becoming a stag to lead Lupin away from the grounds, and luck that no one got hurt or turned.

True, but I enjoy attempting to make characters deeper, it teaches about writing and passes time. As well as forcing people to examine character actions over intentions.

Remus and Sirius explained to Harry that the reason this rivalry began was due to Snape's jealousy over James's talent at Quidditch and his popularity, as well as Snape's interest in the Dark Arts, which James despised. However, it was later revealed that James and Sirius had insulted Snape from the moment they met him in their first year on the Hogwarts Express.

James even charmed Harry's hair to constantly stick up. He used to push his hair back all the time to make it look like he had just gotten off a broomstick, and he made it so Harry's hair would always do that

I don't remember reading this in any of the books, where'd you get that from?

Well in certain Pensieve scenes it mentions how James pushes his hands through his hair to get the broom swept look. And predominantly in the first book, though still existent in other books, Harry's hair shows magical qualities such as growing back extremely fast and being permanently stuck up.
I shouldn't have stated what I said as a fact because I believe it was only heavily implied, I'm sorry

Damnit forgot to login in

Huh, that's an interesting theory.

I still don't see how a fully grown man who is risking his own life to protect his memory of a women who never loved him still didn't have the capacity to put his hatred for a man aside for the adolescent son who knows nothing of why there was the hatred in the first place.