| Home | RSS Feeds |
| Funny Pictures | Funny Videos |
| Funny GIFs | YouTube Videos |
| Text/Links | Channels |
| User Rankings |
Favorite Comeback Ever
Proud Spartan, reporting in
W Allotting , "5
Philip of Macedonia in a _ in
message to Sparta: "You are ' .
advised to submit without
further delay, for if I bring
my army into your land, I
will destroy your farms, slay
your people, and rare your
city."
Sparta' s reply: "If."
Philip of Macedonia in a _ in
message to Sparta: "You are ' .
advised to submit without
further delay, for if I bring
my army into your land, I
will destroy your farms, slay
your people, and rare your
city."
Sparta' s reply: "If."
...
| +998 | Share On Facebook Add to favorites Subscribe to iamtheblackgoat Edit Image | |||||||
| ||||||||
#49
-
imnotkickthecat ONLINE (07/12/2013) [-] 
I cant wait to absolutely crush the Spartans in Rome: total war 2.
Then start a new game and do the reverse.
Then start a new game and do the reverse.
#100
-
greyshirtguy (07/12/2013) [-] And then Philip II of Macedonia has a son, Alexander the Great, who practically owned the **** out of everyone and fought on the front lines, directing the attack. Also, he defeated many armies and conquered many cities. However, each city he conquered, he set free. If they had a diffrent religion, he let them practice their beliefs. If they were slaves, he gave them their freedom. Because of these acts he gained their loyalty. No other king in this time would tolerate such a thing. King of Macedonia, Persia and Asia. Plus, Pharoah of Egypt, the human nature that Alexander displayed was the main reason why the Egyptians made him a Pharoah, and in those times that pretty much made him a god.
But ya'know, Spartas are still cool an' stuff as well...
But ya'know, Spartas are still cool an' stuff as well...
#122 to #100
-
beerterror (07/12/2013) [-] And then his empire collapsed in a generation. And then, a Senat of Rome conquered nearly as much land, defeating more powerful foes. And then came Ceasars. And after thousand years came Genghis Khan.
Alexander is fine and Gaugamela was probably a perfectly conducted battle, but he was a boy who bit more by far than he could chew.
Alexander is fine and Gaugamela was probably a perfectly conducted battle, but he was a boy who bit more by far than he could chew.
#109 to #100
-
Deeticky (07/12/2013) [-] I enjoyed your comment because Alexander was awesome, but he never did actually conquer Sparta.
Alexander, after defeating Persia, sent 300 suits of armor to Athens, with the following inscription:
Alexander, son of Philip, and all the Greeks except the Spartans, give these offerings taken from the foreigners who live in Asia.
Alexander, after defeating Persia, sent 300 suits of armor to Athens, with the following inscription:
Alexander, son of Philip, and all the Greeks except the Spartans, give these offerings taken from the foreigners who live in Asia.
#40
-
salihzzz (07/12/2013) [-] Or when Tito of yugoslavia sent Stalin a letter after Stalin tried to assassinate him for the 22nd time.
Tito to stalin:
'Stop sending people to kill me. We've already captured five of them, one of them with a bomb and another with a rifle... If you don't stop sending killers, I'll send one to Moscow, and I won't have to send a second.'
Tito to stalin:
'Stop sending people to kill me. We've already captured five of them, one of them with a bomb and another with a rifle... If you don't stop sending killers, I'll send one to Moscow, and I won't have to send a second.'
#1
-
anonymous poster (07/12/2013) [-]
I'm pretty sure that's not how it was worded... in this version they say they will win if they bring an army, so what is stopping them?
The version I seen started as "If we win, we will kill your men and enslave your women and children" Which makes more sense
The version I seen started as "If we win, we will kill your men and enslave your women and children" Which makes more sense
#12
-
lazorgator (07/12/2013) [-] And so he never invaded Sparta, sadly enough its because Sparta just wasn't worth the time, at this point in history it was a shell of his former self and on the way out. Later they submitted anyway.
#25
-
flinkflonk (07/12/2013) [-] Pfft.
This is nothing.
This is what Sultan Mahmud wrote to Zaporozhian Cossacks:
As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the sun and moon; slave and viceroy of God; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ; trustee chosen by God Himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians -- I command you, the Zaporogian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks.
--Turkish Sultan Mahmud IV
Their reply
O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are you, that can't slay a hedgehog with your ***** arse? The devil excretes, and your army eats. You will not, you son of a bitch, make subjects of Christian sons; we've no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, **** your mother.
You Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, *********** of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, Armenian pig, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw your own mother!
So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding Christian pigs. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!
This is nothing.
This is what Sultan Mahmud wrote to Zaporozhian Cossacks:
As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the sun and moon; slave and viceroy of God; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ; trustee chosen by God Himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians -- I command you, the Zaporogian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks.
--Turkish Sultan Mahmud IV
Their reply
O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are you, that can't slay a hedgehog with your ***** arse? The devil excretes, and your army eats. You will not, you son of a bitch, make subjects of Christian sons; we've no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, **** your mother.
You Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, *********** of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, Armenian pig, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw your own mother!
So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding Christian pigs. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!
#31 to #25
-
nadastress (07/12/2013) [-] Daenerys Targaryen, the First of Her Name, Queen of Meereen, Queen of the Andals and the Rhoynar and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, Protector of the Realm, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, called Daenerys Stormborn, the Unburnt, Mother of Dragons - Draconis bitches!
#55 to #31
-
anonymous poster (07/12/2013) [-]
You forgot Jesus Christ reborn, The Gods divine gift to the world and the center of the entire universe.
So many people think shes gonna be the savior of Westeros. I think its far more likely and interesting that she will become as ******* insane as her father and be more of villain type character.
So many people think shes gonna be the savior of Westeros. I think its far more likely and interesting that she will become as ******* insane as her father and be more of villain type character.
#70
-
yugzer (07/12/2013) [-] **yugzer rolled a random image posted in comment #50 at Works Every Time **
#41
-
anonymous poster (07/12/2013) [-]
couple years later his son alexander the great takes a piss on sparta
#131
-
yuukoku (07/12/2013) [-] Why is it that people back then were ten times wittier than most people today?
#20
-
anonymous poster (07/12/2013) [-]
You do know that Macedon's did have the stronger more superior army right?
#125
-
Onemanretardpack (07/12/2013) [-] Too bad if you know anything about them, Spartans got ****** in almost every battle. They inflict great losses, but they still end up getting wrecked
#140 to #139
-
Onemanretardpack (07/12/2013) [-] I don't understand how I'm an ******* even though you said flat challenged my character in response to a factual post
Also, do you even understand what you're saying? He said he'll bring their army to their goddamn capitol, and you're arguing over words that have the same meaning. They don't have teleporters, they would actually have to FIGHT to get into their lands. Or you could say, in a way, they'd have to GET THROUGH their army first
Also, do you even understand what you're saying? He said he'll bring their army to their goddamn capitol, and you're arguing over words that have the same meaning. They don't have teleporters, they would actually have to FIGHT to get into their lands. Or you could say, in a way, they'd have to GET THROUGH their army first
#128
-
SognaVetr (07/12/2013) [-] Macedonia then proceeded to obliterate the Spartans and making them their bitches. History, bitches.
