Assassination Tactics: Cat
How to tell inyour
is plotting to
Kneading on you
You may think this is is sign of' ,
but your cat is actually checking your
in bernal organs For weaknesses.
Excessive shoveling of kitty litter
After using the litter but your cat needlessly kicks litter
around. most of it ending up all o'er the more
This is practice For burying bodies.
If you get caught in a staring contest wild’: your cat, do
not but away. Leaking away will signal to your cat
that you are weak, and an attack is likely to Follow.
Bringing you dead animals
This isn' t a gift It' s a warning.
Throwing up grass
Through this painful Feeding and purging process.
cats prepare their minds and bodies For combat.
Hiding in dark places and watching you
Your cat will often hide in order to
study you in your natural habitat. '"
Sleeping on your electronics
Humans was superior technology. Your cat
unsure this and will attempt to disrupt all
communications to the outside world.
Poison; " your Face
while you sleep
Cats aren' t very good at
smothering people. but this
won' t stop them Horn trying.
Sprinting at light speed out
tinny room you enter
When your cat does this, it' s
actually a failed ambush.