A day in the bible belt. I wonder what little children taste like. Maybe they would taste sweet, or more bitter than a normal human. Because I can tell you, the
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A day in the bible belt

I wonder what little children taste like. Maybe they would taste sweet, or more bitter than a normal human. Because I can tell you, the average white man tastes a bit like pork chops. They're better with a bit of salt, too. Do cats taste any different? Maybe, maybe. Actually, if I wanted to know that, I could just go to an asian restaurant. Asians created some cool things. I'm honestly not sure what, exactly, but I'm sure they did. They're everywhere. Apparently they can also read minds. Have you ever wanted to get a bunch of dogs, tie them up, and eat them out? I have. I've done it with little girls, but they just cry and cry and cry. Cry, cry, cry little baby, mommy's not going to save you. In fact, how do you think I got them? Their mothers sold them to me for some five gum. But, because I'm a good citizen and what they did was very very wrong and cruel, I turned them all into hats. I wear them on the different days of the week. And, just to show how good of a citizen, I found every male member of their family who's not yet decomposed (note that if they were rotting but not completely rotted yet, i still did it) and cut off their penises to turn them into belts. I took their balls and made them into maracas. Mexicans have some great food. Tacos, burritos, churros. Dog anuses. The best, I tell ya. But, more to the point, cats. They just get kicked so well. You can freeze em and punt em a good 100 yards on a cloudless day if the moon is in the house of the rising toomanyusernames dick. Yes, that's right toomanyusernames. I know all about your little dick secret. So funnyjunk. Funnyjunk funnyjunk funnyjunk. Yep. Yeppers. Yepperino. I've decided to worship the best elder god. Yes, that's right, assthulu. assthulu is like cthulu but instead of tenticles, he has braided dolphin anuses hanging from his chin. They sway beautufully in the wind. I think I spelled beautifully wrong back there, but I don't care. The backspace button is for those with a weak bowel. Are you actually reading this? I mean, I don't think anyone would actually suffer through this much mediocre writing, this travesty of human creativity, and this absolute disfiguration of words. But I mean, if you have read this much, you need a prize. Like, a seriously awesome prize. Even better than 5gum. Maybe... Yeah, I got it. You need a braided dolphin anus cloak. It's made with freshly squeezed and juiced dolphin anus. What's the plural of anus? Anus? Anuses? Anuspie? Anuseye? Angus? Mmmmm... angus

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Submitted: 06/01/2013
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#1 - solarisofcelestia (06/01/2013) [-]
I didn't ask for this.
#2 - SimianLich (06/01/2013) [+] (5 replies)
This isn't in the bible just some stupid misinformed imbiciles.
#14 - mr skeltal (06/02/2013) [-]
I'll be waiting for my cloak OP. You better deliver.
User avatar #12 - pulsedi **User deleted account** (06/02/2013) [-]
I agree. That description is more interesting than the picture...
User avatar #7 - ksiota (06/01/2013) [+] (2 replies)
"Hey, do you know what a comma is?"

"Nah, never heard of them."

"Good, I also have no knowledge of them."
#13 - unclemagic (06/02/2013) [-]
well for your description i only read up to the cat part because that **** is long.

I can tell u that baby's kinda taste like veal but their just a little tougher depending on if they move around to much.For the cats it kinda tasted a little like dear but it was hard to tell because of the high amounts of msg in the food.

#9 - mr skeltal (06/02/2013) [-]
THAT DESCRIPTION OH MY GOD
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