Marge.... ....You big hypocrite.. Welcome sen, ‘ha survive all we murr do v' seat your Flesh /53 . laurie rieht there Eula! Whaf kind civilized people eaf the b
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Marge...

....You big hypocrite.

Welcome sen, ‘ha survive all we murr do v' seat your Flesh /53 .
laurie rieht there Eula! Whaf kind civilized people
eaf the body and blend of’ salior?!
...
+1793
Views: 65178
Favorited: 96
Submitted: 05/14/2013
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Comments(138):

[ 138 comments ]
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#143 - Cambro ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
Theologyfag here, ready for red thumbs and "buzzkillington" jokes. But here is the actual significance of the eucharist (communion).

In the Ancient Near East culture covenants coincided with and were typically sealed by meals. The "You are the salt of the earth" verse is in reference to this, because the Israelites would share salts and other ****** between families to show loyalty and respect. Not also the Last Supper itself as a fellowship meeting where Christ makes a covenant to his disciples and all men.
Furthermore, the Last Supper feast was done on the Passover. The Passover celebrates the Jews deliverance from Egypt. The Angel of Death (or destruction by some translations) "passed over" the Jewish houses because they spread the blood of a lamb on their door that showed they had a covenant with God. To commemorate this, the Jews eat a pure lamb with no broken bones every year for their Passover celebration feast.
This allegory is why the "Jesus never sinned" bit becomes important. Also, there is an odd verse in John that states Jesus did not have his legs broken which was customary for crucified individuals. John states that Jesus died faster than the rest so he did not need the brutal technique that speeds up death. Why is this important? Because the Passover lamb could have no broken bones or impurities. Christ, by saying "this is my body and this is my blood," is actually stating that he is the new Passover lamb and by his blood the wrath of God is satisfied. It is not meant literally (cue the catholics here), it is meant symbolically. Jesus made himself the Passover lamb so mankind could have a covenant feast with him where we are promised to be delivered by God, no matter our transgressions.

TL;DR: Symbolic **** , yo. Note, if you read this you may know more about Christ and the meaning behind him than many casual Christians do.
User avatar #142 - chuca (05/15/2013) [-]
jesus: get on your knees child and accept my body into you

uh jesus that sounds gay..

jesus: ON YOUR KNEES

ok sheesh...ugh jesus your body's nasty tasting

jesus: oh ok just take a swig of my blood to wash it down

wtf jesus...
+1
#141 - kaoknight **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #147 to #141 - wafflecopper (05/15/2013) [-]
those were the old laws, many of which were to be specifically followed by priests

you know, the guys who officially REPRESENTED God

also the rapist part, the verse you are referring to referred to rape AND seduction

essentially it says that the man has to pay the father as he would if married, the father does not have to allow the marriage, the point is that the rapist would HAVE to pay, and would probably be stoned in response

unfortunately at that time women couldn't really work for themselves, and a raped woman would be considered unattractive and unfit to wed
0
#140 - bdowns has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #135 - manofbeardliness (05/15/2013) [-]
Fun fact, before Christianity became the official religion in Rome and the signing of the Edict of Milan, Romans regarded Christianity as a mystery cult of cannibals because of their talk of eating the body of Christ and drinking the blood.
User avatar #146 to #135 - wafflecopper (05/15/2013) [-]
thats not correct just because its how they felt
User avatar #154 to #146 - manofbeardliness (05/15/2013) [-]
I didn't say that was correct, many thought that though. Hell emperor Nero used the "mystery cult" excuse to blame the Christians for 60% of Rome being burned down in the 1st Century AD.
User avatar #155 to #154 - wafflecopper (05/15/2013) [-]
apologies, it just seemed to imply it to me
User avatar #157 to #155 - manofbeardliness (05/15/2013) [-]
No problem.
#134 - tombreaper (05/15/2013) [-]
**tombreaper rolled a random image posted in comment #4398782 at My Little Pony fanfiction, backgrounds, songs, lyrics, and GIFs. ** their fw
User avatar #148 to #134 - iloveburzum (05/15/2013) [-]
That is the one true god.
#132 - tehtrollface (05/15/2013) [-]
'ha survive we murr do v' seat vour Flesh /53'   
Fj's fw
'ha survive we murr do v' seat vour Flesh /53'
Fj's fw
-1
#125 - zephyrbrony has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #127 to #125 - kolpster (05/15/2013) [-]
At least copy it correctly.
#121 - tuckthisphit (05/15/2013) [-]
I can see the future,there shall be a ********* brewin'
User avatar #97 - fuckmods (05/15/2013) [-]
cannibalism, that it all
#92 - Leumascar ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
User avatar #69 - ninjasquirle (05/15/2013) [-]
And jesus said onto his followers "yay, this is my foot. Pass it down to Judas he looks hungry."
-29
#53 - theheartbreakkid has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #129 to #53 - kolpster (05/15/2013) [-]
iwantmorebutidontwanttoask
User avatar #126 to #53 - dabronydude (05/15/2013) [-]
i did not expect that...
why.
#123 to #53 - thamuz (05/15/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#122 to #53 - killerturd (05/15/2013) [-]
but...why?
#119 to #53 - inbardo (05/15/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#130 to #128 - kolpster (05/15/2013) [-]
This pleases me.
User avatar #116 to #53 - tuckthisphit (05/15/2013) [-]
I've seen some feces.
#98 to #53 - thezombiebait (05/15/2013) [-]
you just scared people for life
you just scared people for life
User avatar #68 to #53 - iphoneguy (05/15/2013) [-]
whoa, post that to NSFW
#58 to #53 - azsx (05/15/2013) [-]
were is that from?
#52 - timol (05/15/2013) [-]
jesus ******* christ....
-15
#33 - meisnotifu has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #34 to #33 - darkjustifier (05/15/2013) [-]
scroll up
User avatar #32 - sebg (05/15/2013) [-]
Imagine the recoil if she actually fired the gun from the way she is holding it
#36 to #32 - manirock (05/15/2013) [-]
This kills the baby
#38 to #36 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
Someone photoshpo Maggy into this.
#40 to #39 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
DO IT PHAGGOT
DO IT PHAGGOT
User avatar #43 to #40 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
Ghaggot
#44 to #43 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
Shut your whore mouth
#46 to #45 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
YOU DARE MOCK ME?!?
#49 to #46 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
U wot m8? 1v1 me ghaggot, I bet you still kiss girls. SHUT DA FUQ UP 'fore I smash yer head in m8. Swer on me mum.
#56 to #49 - azsx (05/15/2013) [-]
were is that pic from?
User avatar #61 to #56 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
Fairy Tail... it's Virgo the 5 Celestial Zodiac Spirit. I just added the "Consider the following" Cause I didn't like the Homer one.
#62 to #61 - azsx (05/15/2013) [-]
is it porn?
User avatar #67 to #62 - sirjohnk (05/15/2013) [-]
._.
#64 to #62 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
No... it's Fairy Tail lol... But theres a **** ton of fan service
#57 to #54 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
(For added effect: www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBNcjvxLfFc )   
GREEN 						***********					! USE 						*********					! PIDGEOTTO! USE WING ATTACK!
(For added effect: www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBNcjvxLfFc )
GREEN *********** ! USE ********* ! PIDGEOTTO! USE WING ATTACK!
#63 to #57 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
Pikachu Lightning Bolt. Super Effective... Pikachu go rape Pidgeottos lifeless carcass.. It's super effective.
#66 to #63 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
You 						************					. WWII PARATROOPER CLOWN! USE CREME PIE! Pikachu is stunned for 5 SECONDS! WWII Clown, finish him with a knife to the throat!   
   
Yes, yes, slit that little yellow neck goood...
You ************ . WWII PARATROOPER CLOWN! USE CREME PIE! Pikachu is stunned for 5 SECONDS! WWII Clown, finish him with a knife to the throat!

Yes, yes, slit that little yellow neck goood...
0
#71 to #66 - thelordofbutthurt has deleted their comment [-]
#70 to #66 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
P-pikachu?... Pikachu are you okay! PIIKACHUU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO   
   
PIKACHU   
   
Ryuuk use scary face! (Your  clown 						******					 is paralyzed, he may not be able to move)
P-pikachu?... Pikachu are you okay! PIIKACHUU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

PIKACHU

Ryuuk use scary face! (Your clown ****** is paralyzed, he may not be able to move)
#151 to #70 - ryuuk (05/15/2013) [-]
you rang?
User avatar #72 to #70 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
JESUS **** WHAT IS THAT!... GODDAMMIT WWII U.S. SOLDIER CLOWN, YOUR A ******* RANGER OF THE UNITED STATES MILITARY, STOP BEING A ***** !
#74 to #72 - thelordofbutthurt (05/15/2013) [-]
Now use Virgin ball and *mortal kombat* FINISH HIM
#77 to #74 - strangesir (05/15/2013) [-]
HAH! Jokes on you! My Ranger Clown is actually a beta virgin ************ , so your virgin ball is NO USE!
User avatar #26 - konradkurze ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
religion:
says homosexuality is bad but cannibalism is okay

so people can eat another mans flesh but arent allowed to suck on 8 inches of it?
User avatar #145 to #26 - wafflecopper (05/15/2013) [-]
canniba-what?

if you are referring to the METAPHORICAL body and blood of Christ, then you have a couple wing nuts all diddly daddleed
User avatar #84 to #26 - tkuja (05/15/2013) [-]
don't be modest
#41 to #26 - swedishassassin (05/15/2013) [-]
Random moron on FunnyJunk:

Says a dime-a-dozen statement lacking any understanding of its purpose in order to feel smart.
I don't care if you don't agree with something, but not understanding it and still disliking it makes you the same if not lower than the group that your condemning.
#48 to #41 - swedishassassin (05/15/2013) [-]
Oh, am I talking nonsense? Actually knowing what your talking about; yea what was I thinking?! Tolerance through education and understanding pft

You're right, konradurze; we should all just stay ignorant and hateful; it's been serving us well for the past 20,000 years!

I can feel the summerfags approaching, even on FunnyJunk
User avatar #153 to #48 - konradkurze ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
wtf are you on about
mainstream religion has been keeping people ignorant of alot of things, leaving alot of things up to 'gods will'

User avatar #30 to #26 - killforhire (05/15/2013) [-]
I'm curious as to what religions allow cannibalism?
User avatar #37 to #30 - smokerocks (05/15/2013) [-]
Religions that tell their followers to eat something because it is the bod of their savior . . . .

Seriously I have friends who are so ******** christian that they attend mass a few days a week, and are 24 years old and still saving themselves for marriage. They even laughed at this. Lighten up.
#42 to #37 - swedishassassin (05/15/2013) [-]
Why do you care what they do? Let them do what they want to do; it doesn't affect you. And if it really does for some bizzare reason, don't be friends with them...
User avatar #50 to #42 - smokerocks (05/15/2013) [-]
You're reading comprehension isn't that good is it? I didn't criticize them for doing it, or make fun. I simply pointed out that they followed their religion to the letter, to point out that even my devout Christian friends found this funny, where as the person i was replying to acted like they didn't get the joke.
User avatar #55 to #50 - swedishassassin (05/15/2013) [-]
...Sorry I read "they laughed at this" as "I laughed at this". I am legitimately sorry; I get kind of uptight with these posts, not because they attack religion or whatever, but because they're usually people just making pointless points in order to sound smart

Once again, I'm sorry for my mistake.
User avatar #59 to #55 - smokerocks (05/15/2013) [-]
It's all good, I'd be lying out of my ass if I acted like I'd never misread a post.
User avatar #31 to #30 - konradkurze ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
well most actually when you think about it

how many faiths symbolically eat the flesh and blood of christ
0
#29 to #26 - killforhire has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #27 to #26 - certifiedidiot ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
Don't play with your food.
#28 to #27 - konradkurze ONLINE (05/15/2013) [-]
but but but.....
i like pouncing survivors
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