Every time. 100% not OC. Ill, How MOST we GROUPS. What if we had an online Funnyjunk D&D campaign with DJ 4DM1N as the Dungeon Master?
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Every time

100% not OC

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Submitted: 04/24/2013
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User avatar #8 - captainfuckitall (04/24/2013) [+] (24 replies)
What if we had an online Funnyjunk D&D campaign with DJ 4DM1N as the Dungeon Master?
#11 - crustypizza ONLINE (04/25/2013) [+] (22 replies)
Story time!
.First time playing in a large group(8 people)
.Our group is looking for a dungeon called: "The Dungeon of Puzzles"
.We stop at a village that is apparently near said dungeon
.In the whole village only half the houses are occupied
.We get the smart idea to split up
.We require 3/3 pieces of information to locate the dungeon
.The first house is run down and occupied by a poor woman riddled with diseases
.The two rouges: Corrin and Hachikuji decide to visit said house
.Lockpick the door and the first thing Corrin does is cut off the womans finger when she fails to answer the first question
.Hachikuji intimidates him into the corner but fails to roll a heal check so the woman dies
.Across town there is a meth house
.The Elf Wizard: Gingavitus and the Paladin Dragonborn: Jin
.They knock on the door and after waiting two minutes a bunch of locks are opened and an eye peers out of the gap
.Ginga decided to pull a weird face so the door was closed on them
.Then they got the bright idea to pretend to be law enforcement
.A loud clattering of instruments and glass breaking could be heard for a minute before it stopped
.After they stood there for another minute they realise that the meth dealer is escaping
.Jin fails roll check for both strength and constitution to break down the door so he ends up rolling on the dirt rubbing his shoulder
.Ginga decides to use Magic Missile on the door but fails his roll and it ricochets off the door, flies over his head, hits a lantern then hits Ginga in the back
.Two grown men lay on the ground for five minutes, groning in pain and by the time they got up, the meth dealer was gone
.And they got no meth out of it, building was cleared out
>DM's face when Corrin murdered a woman in cold blood and Ginga and Jin got beaten by a door
#53 - xexion (04/25/2013) [+] (16 replies)
Time for dump
#36 - motherfuckingkenji ONLINE (04/25/2013) [+] (1 reply)
#14 - spooooon (04/25/2013) [+] (3 replies)
When your a halfling and have a half orc barbarian in your group   
"Throw me at him"
When your a halfling and have a half orc barbarian in your group
"Throw me at him"
#119 - atomicoption (04/25/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Not OC, but still hilarious
User avatar #92 - deliciousdee ONLINE (04/25/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I got one:
>DMing for a Warhammer Fantasy RP group.
>Lustria campaign, so Lizardmen and dinos galore
>Have an Ogre and a knight errant in the party that are buddies
>Duo decides to split off from the group to go explore the forest
>Hear stomping in the distance
>Go investigate, come to a clearing and peer out of the brush
>A bunch of skinks trying to bring an unruly stegadon into line
>Ogre and knight errant decide to charge out screaming
>Skinks caught of guard, trying to scramble up on top of the stegadon but failing miserably
>stegadon freaks out and starts rampaging
>Ogre attempts to grapple the stegadon for a good 10 minutes in game while the knight dodges its charges and kills skinks
>Ogre now riding the Stegadon, can't get it under control
>Stegadon lands a hit on the knight
> ****** .jpg
to be continued
User avatar #94 to #92 - deliciousdee ONLINE (04/25/2013) [-]
CONTINUED:
>Knight player asks me if he can make a dodge attempt, doesn't have skill so it'll have penalties
>Knight carrying a shield, decides to make a block attempt
>Rolls equivalent of a natural 20.
>Jesus ******* christ...
>Let him make a strength check, rolls a 10
>another 10. Another 10. A 9.
>Lowly knight errant deflects massive ******* rampaging triceratops with a wooden round shield
>Stegadon goes crashing into the ground
>Ogre pins it down
>Knight happened to take charm animal
>Another nat20
>Ogre and knight return to party riding the ******* stegadon

And that is the story of how my players broke my Lustria campaign
User avatar #25 - softcover (04/25/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Playing as shifter barbarian
in a dungeon with a 10 foot high ledge
friend is gnome rogue
other friend (her boyfriend) is fighter triceratops thing
knoll leader (we were just starting the campaign) is taunting us from atop said ledge
"Throw me"
"what."
"Okay."
We plan to use momentum to help toss her, he toss first to me and I swing her up,
He picks her up and tosses her to me, I forget I'm about 3 inches from the ledge and end up killing her because I smashed her into the wall face first breaking her neck on impact with this huge wall.
#160 - ragingflamingos (04/25/2013) [+] (2 replies)
As of our last D&D game, our healer has been killed by a frost giant and a fire spell gone awry (my bad), our druid has a pet whore who turned into a dragon following him around and our tank just got possessed by a gay sado-masochist necromancer.
As of our last D&D game, our healer has been killed by a frost giant and a fire spell gone awry (my bad), our druid has a pet whore who turned into a dragon following him around and our tank just got possessed by a gay sado-masochist necromancer.
#155 - vonboon (04/25/2013) [-]
I play for the first time this sat i hope its a good time
User avatar #108 - eddymolly (04/25/2013) [-]
>playing D&D with some friends
>good party going, good selection of classes and stuff
>warrior tank, ranger DPS, cleric healer etc
>DM has a half orc barbarian called Barzon with int and wis of like 5
>keeps ******* up everything we do by being retarded
>everyone getting really pissed off with him
>end up locked in dungeon thanks to him being stupid
>only escape is through a hole in the roof about 12 foot away
>barzon attivates a trap, dungeon starts filling up with water
>snake comes out in water, starts hitting everyone
>knocks a few of us unconcious
>we're all pissed, going to loose our characters
>Barzon suddenly stands on the snakes tail
>manages to pin the snake to the floor with a spear through its tail and his own foot
>pulls out the best rolls i've ever seen
>manages to throw our characters through the hole in the roof with some natural 20's and really lucky rolls
>grabs the unconscious characters, saves them by throwing them up to us as well
>Barzon ends up sacrificing himself to save all our characters
>becomes a legend in all our future games
#99 - NinjaHermit (04/25/2013) [+] (7 replies)
User avatar #162 - elf (04/25/2013) [+] (13 replies)
If D&D becomes a trend I will officially be completely happy with FJ forever.
#87 - hiiamolli (04/25/2013) [-]
This was my last DnD group.
User avatar #29 - thadin (04/25/2013) [-]
DnD parties... Oh what fun they are.
I played as a Human Spell Sword who was the biggest asshole in exsistance. He loved to shoot flares [our DM just had them be a d10 fire attack] and they ended up in extremes. Either they annihilated everything they touched, or I set myself on fire.
Our Cleric was the only sane person, but was comically useless at healing and attacking.
A Dwarf Ranger, who probably had tourretes and used barrel lids, a sling and a doomfist for weapons. An absolute idiot, but nobody would dare **** with him.
A Halfling Bard NPC that was literally possessed by Satan.
A Human Fighter NPC who we called Dumble. Decent in fighting though, one time he scored a triple-critical hit on a Gnoll and punched straight through it's chest.
Had an H-Orc Barbarian, my character didn't like him. He slipped some sort of tar-based death potion [I'll explain it later.] in to the H-Orcs drink.

We never got far, because most of us had to move away... It was fun while it lasted.
#1 - chupavisor (04/24/2013) [+] (2 replies)
RUN AWAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
User avatar #150 - sorrowofdaedalus (04/25/2013) [-]
>First time playing DND, just messing around.
> We've got a Cleric and two archers. The need for a tank is obvious, apparently.
>Make a rogue who disguises himself as a Jester
>Everyone else I'm playing with is a several year veteran.
>We're helping Gnomes. Why? **** Gnomes, I don't know.
> Three orcs attack
>Everyone immediately goes about attacking.
>I ask the nearest gnome for explosives.
>Low rolls all around. Orcs kick ass and Gnome says no like a little bitch.
>Say **** it, and claims to attack both of them with cool Jester Swords.
>Rolls 20's for each hit, and watches the nerdgasm taking place.
User avatar #172 - thatguyontheright (04/25/2013) [-]
to me, Dungeons and Dragons is not entirely entertaining unless it hits one of two extremes, really into the game, or the group getting drunk.



Last time my group played drunk D+D we poured a bottle of perfume on a small goblin child and kicked him into a campfire.
User avatar #131 - rasberryassassin (04/25/2013) [+] (1 reply)
>first time playing D&D
>me as a druid elf
>friends are playing a human cleric, paladin, a halfling rogue and a drow wizard
>everyone is good or lawful alignment except our wizard who is choatic evil (think he sort of changed to lawful evil later)
>he also made his character an alcoholic who hates elves
>we all meet for the first time in a tavern
>wiz is drunk
>we get in a fight
>we all get arrested and have to pay fines by going on quests
>Wiz is a brony so I offer to let him ride my animal companion who is a war pony named Big Mac so as to convince the wiz to cooperate
>dm won't let wiz ride the pony because it is not chaotic evil enough
>finally we get to some wolves
>rolls are terrible, Big Mac is the only one to kill a wolf by himself
>pali rolls a 1 and hits himself in the foot
>eventually our dm gets sick of us failing and get says the last wolf bleeds out
>next we find a chest





User avatar #132 to #131 - rasberryassassin (04/25/2013) [-]
>ITS A ******* MIMIC
>grapples our rogue nearly killing him
>wiz thinks it's a good idea to throw an aoe spell at it
>spell hits our rogue
>rogue is unconscious
>mimic goes for our healer
>kills him
>eventually we all just give up and end the campaign there (we spent a few hours making characters before hand so we had enough for one day)
>though we all played terribly that night it was still really fun
#72 - pappathethird (04/25/2013) [-]
THat's not always how it ends
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