It's gonna happen. . Mother of godl I have trained Zombies are here! _ my entire life for this moment. f I must be a hero!. We all think we'll be the zombie ass kickers, but hey, the world will need a lot of zombies
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It's gonna happen

Mother of godl I have trained
Zombies are here! _ my entire life for
this moment.
f I must be a hero!
...
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Views: 40247
Favorited: 23
Submitted: 04/24/2013
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#98 - meebert (04/25/2013) [-]
I'm pretty sure if there was a zombie outbreak people would try to claim walmart as a fort and start killing each other, I don't think anybody has an actual plan better than " **** yeah shotgun!"
0
#94 - tacogrenade has deleted their comment [-]
#73 - magnusos (04/25/2013) [-]
**magnusos rolled a random image posted in comment #10 at I guess you could say... ** this is what i would do
User avatar #95 to #73 - raynagrimm (04/25/2013) [-]
is she a real character and not rule 63? if so can i get a link to the first episode she appears in?

i try to look my self later but if i could maybe get a name that would be helpful
#103 to #95 - CatfishCrothers ONLINE (04/25/2013) [-]
Nope she is completely rule 63.
User avatar #121 to #103 - brothergrimm (04/26/2013) [-]
shut up dude don't ruin it for him. let the kid dream
#85 to #73 - othagovna ONLINE (04/25/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#80 to #73 - deathlos (04/25/2013) [-]
i would do her too...
User avatar #82 to #80 - brothergrimm (04/25/2013) [-]
wouldn't we all.....
User avatar #91 to #82 - chickendinna (04/25/2013) [-]
yeah, maybe except for that little ********** gohan....
#61 - VaultTechy (04/25/2013) [-]
**VaultTechy rolls 7,899** roll four and see how you'd do
User avatar #111 to #61 - edzero (04/25/2013) [-]
**edzero rolls 7,482**
User avatar #112 to #111 - edzero (04/25/2013) [-]
A Dragunov SVD with silver bullets... ALRIGHT!
Soft Air gun (aww--) with handgun scope attachment (--YES!)
A Machete...
8x C4 explosives....
I am the freaking Spider-man...IN A WATER PARK!!!
A fortifed truck...all right...
the MP3 player with the song is my sidekick!
Too bad it dies and the only ridge is swarming with zombies...
aaaaaaand I got call of the horde.
Overall: I am ****** 10 times and send to hell...



User avatar #107 to #61 - theshadowed (04/25/2013) [-]
**theshadowed rolls 1,689**
User avatar #109 to #107 - theshadowed (04/25/2013) [-]
Ak-47 Gold, with silencer. Hell yeah, silenced shootings.
S&W 66 with reflex
Nunchucknorris
Motion Sensors
Samurai's Armour
Mountain Cabin
Sports Cars gold
Breivick
And Breivick tries to eat me.
Stalker pack. Beaten by motion sensors.
So, I'm alright
User avatar #106 to #61 - VaultTechy (04/25/2013) [-]
**VaultTechy rolls 5,215**
User avatar #101 to #61 - eattherich (04/25/2013) [-]
**eattherich rolls 3,029**
User avatar #93 to #61 - rotucex (04/25/2013) [-]
**rotucex rolls 4,449**
#96 to #93 - rotucex (04/25/2013) [-]
Oh wow, that was close
But anyway, I rolled AK-47 custom gold, grenade launcher attachment, soft air gun, laser sught attachment, 12x beart traps, 100g weed, samurai aarmor custom gold, I start in a shopping mall, I've got a sports car custom gold, and ARNOLD is my sidekick. Also, I've got 3 hours to prepare before zombies and 4 unarmed survivors try to arm me off, and there are "Zombified Crows": attacks in great numbers, often up to hundred individuals simultaneously. Wery veak to damage.
User avatar #104 to #96 - VaultTechy (04/25/2013) [-]
Don't forget the trips gives you a napalm strike and a roll-select
User avatar #105 to #104 - rotucex (04/25/2013) [-]
Oh, I forgot about that: so yeah, napalm strike and I'll get Desert Eagle custom gold (because it's shiny)
#92 to #61 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
**anonymous rolls 6,517**
User avatar #89 to #61 - bonkboy (04/25/2013) [-]
**bonkboy rolls 0,214**
#90 to #89 - bonkboy (04/25/2013) [-]
I think I'm 						******					 with this scenario setup. Guess I know what I'm doing on that rooftop
I think I'm ****** with this scenario setup. Guess I know what I'm doing on that rooftop
#88 to #61 - magicboudha ONLINE (04/25/2013) [-]
**magicboudha rolls 6,011**
User avatar #84 to #61 - xoskell (04/25/2013) [-]
**xoskell rolls 6,804**
#83 to #61 - deathlos (04/25/2013) [-]
**deathlos rolls 7,399**
#87 to #83 - deathlos (04/25/2013) [-]
Ak-47, unlimited ammo, Starting out in a lighthouse, with 8mines...
not bad...

not quite sure, with 12items, and only having 4 numbers to assign, seems kinda weird,
0
#81 to #61 - deathlos has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #79 to #61 - iforgetwhattosay ONLINE (04/25/2013) [-]
**iforgetwhattosay rolls 8,667**
#76 to #61 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
**anonymous rolls 5,337**
#77 to #76 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
not bad
#75 to #61 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
*roll4*
#65 to #61 - VaultTechy (04/25/2013) [-]
Huh, I rolled Gold Samurai Armor with a Gold Desert Eagle and a Gold AK-47, starting inside the White House with a "Nunchucknorris", silver bullets and a pistol scope
0
#59 - VaultTechy has deleted their comment [-]
0
#58 - necroshiz **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #51 - majortomcomics (04/25/2013) [-]
Zombie apocalypse is completely implausible and would not even be a possibility.
#74 to #51 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
false
User avatar #52 to #51 - gmarrox (04/25/2013) [-]
That comment was both redundant and it repeated itself.
User avatar #53 to #52 - majortomcomics (04/25/2013) [-]
No, implausible means probably won't happen, impossible means it can't happen. Things that we think can't happen happen all the time, but this is definitely not gonna happen.
User avatar #56 to #53 - gmarrox (04/25/2013) [-]
And redundant means something was unnecessarily stated despite being known or previously stated, whereas repeated simply means stated again.


Semantics.
User avatar #48 - Yojimbo (04/25/2013) [-]
I would be the guy who would survive the initial outbreak, but would still end up dying of something completely zombie unrelated.

Snakebite
Measles
Dysentery
#63 to #48 - goldsignet (04/25/2013) [-]
i have decent wilderness skill (from canada and camp/hunt/trap alot), so i know that id a good chance make it for a while if the zombies were slow and lumbering like walking dead zombies. so many people say theyd go to canada and live in the mountains or far north, but what most people dont realise is that it is VERY hard to live in the wilderness during the winter without external supply, so at best id make it through 3 seasons, and die of exposure(being someone whos actually spent a few summers and winters back packing and hunting in a group of 4). shooting, archery, trapping, and foraging are beyond the talents of most average people even in perfect conditions. not saying that you dont have experience or knowledge as well, im just saying that only a few percent of the population would be able to live off the land, and even fewer would be able to do it long term
User avatar #50 to #48 - izzygirl (04/25/2013) [-]
Dysentery is definitely one of the worst ways to die.
I'd rather be eaten by zombies.
#49 to #48 - grrphc (04/25/2013) [-]
..How the **** do you know?
#46 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
I'm convinced I have a high chance of surviving a zombie Apocalypse for several reasons:   
   
1. I rarely panic, natural disasters make me happy, so shock isn't an issue   
2. Thinking is everything. The most important thing in a zombie apocalypse is figuring out what type of zombies you are dealing with and how it spreads. (For example, if the zombies have eye sight, their speed, etc.)   
3. I could care less about bashing out the brains of infected family members (They're already..dead, un, undead.)   
4. Hunting zombies is impossible and should be avoided at all costs, you fight as necessary and only in an organized group of trustable members    
5. I prefer an apocalypse over the modern world, sadly, I'm one of "those" people.   
   
That being said, I could just end up like this guy.   
   
Anyways TL;DR:   
Just because you'd easily die doesn't mean we all would, frankly I'm tired of hearing this joke.
I'm convinced I have a high chance of surviving a zombie Apocalypse for several reasons:

1. I rarely panic, natural disasters make me happy, so shock isn't an issue
2. Thinking is everything. The most important thing in a zombie apocalypse is figuring out what type of zombies you are dealing with and how it spreads. (For example, if the zombies have eye sight, their speed, etc.)
3. I could care less about bashing out the brains of infected family members (They're already..dead, un, undead.)
4. Hunting zombies is impossible and should be avoided at all costs, you fight as necessary and only in an organized group of trustable members
5. I prefer an apocalypse over the modern world, sadly, I'm one of "those" people.

That being said, I could just end up like this guy.

Anyways TL;DR:
Just because you'd easily die doesn't mean we all would, frankly I'm tired of hearing this joke.
User avatar #108 to #46 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
Ah but of course.

The betas can't handle anyone who hates or doesn't agree with the sentiments of this joke
#62 to #46 - burntcheesey (04/25/2013) [-]
There is an unstoppable outbreak of the Ampulex Compressa Giganteus. Can you afford enough zombrex too last you until the military comes? (Zombrex costs 300$ a box at pharmacies)
User avatar #86 to #62 - murrlogic (04/25/2013) [-]
I would if ******* Otis would stop ******* calling me!
User avatar #66 to #62 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
I am kill
User avatar #64 to #62 - burntcheesey (04/25/2013) [-]
I noticed I used the wrong to...
User avatar #67 to #64 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
Only solution is to jump off a bridge
Comment has been flagged   Hide Hide All +Fav (0) Reply -1
#60 to #46 - acontradiction (04/25/2013) [-]
Flagged Comment Picture
This image was flagged 10/19/2013
User avatar #68 to #60 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
Sauce
#69 to #68 - acontradiction (04/25/2013) [-]
Nah, it's blood, bro. Though it does look like sauce..
User avatar #70 to #69 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
source
#72 to #70 - acontradiction (04/25/2013) [-]
I was kidding, by the way. youtube .com/watch?v=McpbIV-4_Ec
User avatar #54 to #46 - drdiddly (04/25/2013) [-]
"natural disasters make me happy" really?
What do you do, look outside at a tornado ripping apart houses and throwing people in to the air?
"Oh look! A tornado! Wow, you're a strong tornado!"
User avatar #71 to #54 - infinitereaper (04/25/2013) [-]
Oh you know I just feel and think the usual:

Ah, finally, something new to break of the monotony, all of these stupid people panicking and dying, ***** finally going down, the earth is alive, feel the wind and hear the thunder! I could die! I could live! (laughter)

Like I said I'm one of "those" people.
#44 - rotersand (04/25/2013) [-]
I've come to terms with my fate once the zombie apocalypse strikes. My abilities as a human are relatively sub-par, however with my amazing sense of smell and my tendency to wander off I'm going to be a kick ass zombie.
#40 - doyoulikeapizza (04/25/2013) [-]
**doyoulikeapizza rolled a random image posted in comment #33 at When I say I'm From Hawaii **
User avatar #37 - ericzxvc (04/25/2013) [-]
So by train you mean browse the internet all day and fantasize about being a badass? Yeah I'd say you're definitely prepared.
#36 - farfigschiter (04/25/2013) [-]
I'm a 6'4 chubby guy with terrible cardio who has never lived on his own and can't fire a weapon.
#43 to #36 - injerseyforever (04/25/2013) [-]
You're missing out on the most important rule if it happens.
#45 to #43 - jewnicorn (04/25/2013) [-]
Woohoo for cardio.
#42 to #36 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
I second that.
User avatar #24 - fedegon (04/25/2013) [-]
If zombies do become real, I'll find an effective armor to be made out of living beings and a shelter. Once I find a place completely devoid of zombies, I'll make a house in there, finding everything I need (food, water, porn), wait until the human race starts anew, new religions and such will start, and society will begin by year one. I will then train my own skills physically, since whatever survived the zombies must be pretty badass, and then I'll attempt to be the strongest in the universe. Once everything is over, as the master of the universe, I will see society, completely devoid of that curse, and then I'll look back on my house I built among the chaos, and realize one thing: No matter what comes, I will stand strong as the strongest human, as the survivor, as Roshi.
#38 to #24 - tsukaza (04/25/2013) [-]
Touching....
User avatar #23 - sirbutterballs (04/25/2013) [-]
I feel like I would become a bandit and stay up on rooftops.
#21 - misterymisterman (04/25/2013) [-]
Fixed.
#10 - savioranonymous ONLINE (04/24/2013) [-]
Hmmm?
#9 - anonymous (04/24/2013) [-]
Zombies aren't real, grow the **** up. It is scientifically impossible to reanimate the dead. Just a few minutes without oxygen does severe, irreversible damage to the brain. Only 5 year olds with over active imaginations believe in zombies. It's childish and ******** .
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#97 to #9 - wanicochil has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #57 to #9 - drdiddly (04/25/2013) [-]
Everyone must like you.

Anyways, I think zombies are real, they just haven't risen form their graves yet. I dunno. But anyways, there is this bug/ parasite that turns prey into zombies. Once it got a cockroach and the cockroach died and then minutes later, the cockroach started twitching, sat up and started walking around. If that were to affect us (probably not because we're too big) we'd probably become zombies
#113 to #57 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
That's not a zombie than.

Zombie - the body of a dead person given the semblance of life, but mute and will-less, by a supernatural force, usually for some evil purpose.

That's a mind controlling parasite. Not a zombie.
#47 to #9 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
Im just saying, the zombies from the walking dead actually make some amount of biological sense, and if some ass hole managed to make a virus that behaved like that, we'd all be ****** .
#114 to #47 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
It'll be a mental disease than, not a zombie.
#39 to #9 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
Or take the Zombieland approach. Simply a mutation of the mad cow disease that causes extreme aggression, insatiable hunger, and lulls the brain's activity. Viruses mutate all the time, in theory this would be possible.
#115 to #39 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
It's a kind of mental disease than caused by a virus. Not a true zombie.
#34 to #9 - deadlyyarikh (04/25/2013) [-]
Sure ******* the hottest girl in school isn't going to happen but that sure as hell isn't going to stop me from hoping it does everyday.
User avatar #33 to #9 - neiharakon (04/25/2013) [-]
Not true. Artificial stimulation of the brain stem is theoretically possible by either the means of a virus or a nano machine. Advances in the adaptation and purposing of these modifiers is where a great deal of medical funding is going.
#116 to #33 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
That's a mental disorder or disease than caused by a virus, not a true zombie.
User avatar #117 to #116 - neiharakon (04/25/2013) [-]
The effects would be identical. There would be generalized movement in sluggish form as well as an insatiable hunger due to the unrestrained basic functions. It is reanimation and cannibalism. Just because it is no longer supernatural does not qualify to dismiss as "not a zombie". This is what we got and what is very possible as a contingency so not having a "zombie apocalypse" because it isn't possible is a flat out lie. This is possible, it can happen, and you should at least be aware of that possibility.
#118 to #117 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
It's still not a zombie. It'll be a disease. Zombies have to be super natural, that's what a zombie is.

Zombie - the body of a dead person given the semblance of life, but mute and will-less, by a supernatural force, usually for some evil purpose.
User avatar #119 to #118 - neiharakon (04/25/2013) [-]
Ineffective definition is ineffective. If it eats brains and shambles about after it's already dead I'm sure we're all gonna take a moment to make a new name for it since it can't be a zombie.
#120 to #119 - anonymous (04/26/2013) [-]
Probably. I've heard some mutations of rabbis before as possibilities, in which case they'd say mutated Rabbis. Not zombies.
#25 to #9 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
It makes me very sad that this is the first person I have agreed with on the subject. And everyone hated it. People need to find a new hope to change their boring life, maybe one that requires they get off their fat ass and do something.
#22 to #9 - babbylicious (04/25/2013) [-]
He has a point you know. It is scientifically impossible for zombies to exist, and even if they did, they would decompose so quickly in most areas.
#17 to #9 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
People said the same thing to da Vinci when he proposed a flying machine. We now take flight for granted.

So suck a dick, ****** .
User avatar #11 to #9 - sparkyoneonetwo (04/24/2013) [-]
There is a Fungus that kills ants then takes over the ants brain. Then the Fungus has total control over the ant. It's that is basically a zombie ant. If that fungus was to ever effect humans humans would then basically be zombies. Maybe not the flesh eating kind from games and movies but still a zombie.
#99 to #11 - wanicochil (04/25/2013) [-]
Dam, you already posted about the zombie ants...
Dam, you already posted about the zombie ants...
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#26 to #11 - acemcgunner has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #29 to #26 - sparkyoneonetwo (04/25/2013) [-]
ummmm.... okay....
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#30 to #29 - acemcgunner has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #32 to #30 - sparkyoneonetwo (04/25/2013) [-]
ummm... okay...
#31 to #30 - ending (04/25/2013) [-]
leave me out of this.
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#27 to #26 - acemcgunner has deleted their comment [-]
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#28 to #27 - acemcgunner has deleted their comment [-]
#15 to #11 - anonymous (04/24/2013) [-]
That's not a zombie than. You described more of a mental disease or parasite like you said.

Zombie - the body of a dead person given the semblance of life, but mute and will-less, by a supernatural force, usually for some evil purpose.
User avatar #16 to #15 - sparkyoneonetwo (04/24/2013) [-]
Well if that's not a zombie 99% of all zombies aren't zombies. Most zombie come about by the same process. Something kills it then it brings it brain back to life. Almost every zombie is some kinda parasite or disease.
#18 to #16 - anonymous (04/25/2013) [-]
No what you described was mind control, not reanimating dead tissue.
User avatar #19 to #18 - sparkyoneonetwo (04/25/2013) [-]
The fungus kills the ant it's totally dead then some time latter it gets back up and move.
#13 to #11 - wheresthefudge (04/24/2013) [-]
Don't take this the wrong way, but you want "affect". "Effect" is a noun, while "affect" is a verb. You can easily remember this by "affect" and "action" starting with the same letter.   
Completely agree with the rest of what you're saying, by the way.
Don't take this the wrong way, but you want "affect". "Effect" is a noun, while "affect" is a verb. You can easily remember this by "affect" and "action" starting with the same letter.
Completely agree with the rest of what you're saying, by the way.
User avatar #14 to #13 - sparkyoneonetwo (04/24/2013) [-]
Well that is good to know. I will most likely not remember that as I have been struggling with spelling and grammar my whole life it is very hard for me for some reason.
User avatar #7 - DwightKSchrute (04/24/2013) [-]
are those.... zombified strutting Leo's???
#6 - analrespect (04/24/2013) [-]
rule #17
don't be a hero
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